Because there have been so many changes in the workforce over the past fifteen years, there are fewer role models in senior leadership.Redefining Leadership
It’s choice—not chance—
that determines your destiny.
—JEAN NIDETCH, FOUNDER OF WEIGHT WATCHERS
Think about a specific person in your life whom you truly respect (not a hypothetical person, but a real, living-breathing person you know), someone you would consider to be a leader, who has influenced you in a positive way. Maybe this someone is a boss or a colleague. Perhaps your someone is a teacher, mentor, or coach. You trust this person. You know you can count on them. You believe in them. You believe that they care about you and want you to succeed. How do you feel when you’re with this person? What will you do for this person that you wouldn’t necessarily do for someone you didn’t trust or respect, someone who may or may not care about you?
One of the things people expect, when you run a leadership company, is that you’ve defined leadership. In my mind it’s pretty simple. As I’ve said, a leader is someone people want to follow, not have to follow.
To want is a choice. I want you on my team. I want to give her my best. I want to be here. I want it. I choose it.
Leadership isn’t a title; it’s a choice. Do the people you lead choose you or not?
When you think about it, in today’s business environment, that’s everything. When people want to follow—when they want to be a part of what you’re doing—how differently do they show up?
Well . . . how differently do you show up?
Let’s get real: how differently do you show up in meetings when you want to be there versus when you have to be there? Is your computer open and are you checking your phone a million times if you want to be there?
How much effort do you put into projects when you want to be involved? I know for myself, when I want to do something, I go all out. When I want it, I don’t hold back. I learn everything I can, I tell everyone I know, and I’m excited. I’ll be so into whatever it is I want to do that I’ll totally lose track of time. I can’t hold back my ideas, and I’m so full of energy that my passion is almost contagious.
To want is powerful. To want gives you access to creativity, ideas, excitement, loyalty, energy, passion, advocacy, commitment, focus, innovative thinking, joy, and fun. Want unlocks full engagement. To want corrals the emotion in the workplace and unleashes it as a force for good. It aligns the elephants and the riders.
Back in the paycheck-exchange era, it was a lot easier to motivate someone with a carrot or a stick because whether or not they wanted to give you their best didn’t matter quite as much. You weren’t asking for their best, you were asking for their good enough. You didn’t need people to think creatively or strategically or bring their ideas to work. You didn’t expect people to go the extra mile and answer emails until eleven thirty p.m. or jump on a global conference call in their jammies. You didn’t need people to make decisions that would benefit the business or lead their teams or manage their own time. But now you do. Now you need them to take on a boatload of responsibility, be exponentially more productive, and think independently. Their good enough doesn’t cut it. You can’t succeed without their best.
Author Dan Pink, in his book (and brilliant TED Talk and RSA Animated video) Drive: The Surprising Truth About What Motivates Us, has done some compelling work around the shift in what it takes to motivate others at work. Pink shows there’s a better way than the carrot or the stick to get the results we seek. “We know that human beings are not merely smaller, slower, better smelling donkeys trudging after the day’s carrot.” (I’d like to think so.)
Yes. And still . . .
That old carrot-and-stick thing is a hard habit to break. I teach this stuff and I have a problem with it! My son will be home from school for one of the many, many, many holidays that only school children, banks, and postal workers enjoy, and I’ll optimistically try to get some work done, hoping he’ll play quietly on his own.
“Honey, Mommy has to jump on a conference call. If you’re quiet and you don’t interrupt me, we can go out for ice cream later!” I say, beaming. And then, serious Mommy takes over and says, “But if you bug me, you won’t get to have your play date with Tyler later this afternoon.”
Habits are hard to break, but if we want to motivate others in this new era of work, this is something we need to change. In Pink’s research, he identifies three things we need to feel motivated to “drive” ourselves in this new world of work: We need to have a sense of autonomy (the ability to choose how we approach our work), mastery (be able to experience ourselves getting better, knowing more, and improving), and purpose (working for a cause larger than ourselves).
I likely don’t have to tell you that this is a motivation model that has yet to catch on. Our organizations are engulfed in a backlog of carrots and sticks. Old habits die hard.
It’s no wonder that today leaders feel frustrated and overwhelmed, because the rules have changed. It’s no wonder if you feel paralyzed and don’t know what to do, because there are few models to follow. Every leader is facing an epic shift in what works.
I will never forget the day Julia showed up in my session with her head cocked to the side and her eyes fixed on some mysterious spot on the floor. I couldn’t tell if she was annoyed or simply indifferent, but it was quite obvious that she was not a happy person at that moment. She did not want to be there and made it clear. The question was, why?
She didn’t participate much the morning of the session. She listened intently. She didn’t make eye contact, but I could see her wheels spinning—questioning, debating, and scrutinizing the conversation in her head. What was she thinking? It was hard to know.
During lunch, as we all sat around the table, she looked conflicted. Something was up, and I couldn’t tell what it was.
“Julia?” I asked gently. “Are you okay?”
For the first time that day, she looked me right in the eye and, like a release valve going off, said forcefully, “I don’t want to be a leader if I have to be like the other leaders at my company!”
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard this same sentiment or something similar—countless. And it makes sense. For years and years, organizations thrived at the hands of leaders who mastered the ability to command and control. But it’s a new world, and it requires a new kind of leadership. What worked back then no longer provides the same results. Great talent is no longer willing to hang out with bullies in the boardroom in exchange for a paycheck. They know they have options or can create options. And they will. And they do.
Because here’s what’s real . . .
We’re redefining leadership. The leaders and aspiring leaders in today’s workplace are the new models. How can you bring your most confident, powerful, and authentic self to the workplace in order to get the results you need? The change starts with you.
Lucky you, brave leader.
Key Takeaways
Because there have been so many changes in the workforce over the past fifteen years, there are fewer role models in senior leadership.
Our traditional means of motivation at work—the carrot and stick—isn’t effective in getting the best results out of people in today’s workplace.
Unless you harness the “want” of the people you need to lead and influence, your ability to succeed is compromised.
If you want to be a brave leader, you must recognize you have a responsibility to model a new kind of leadership for tomorrow’s leaders.