Amber watched Spynosaur race away, his broad, scaly head low, his long tail stretched out behind him. Two minutes earlier they had landed on an island in the middle of the Bermuda Triangle, a short walk from Dr Ego’s now-destroyed secret lair. The Dino-soarer had settled, silently and invisibly, on a white-sand beach, which would have been pristine, but for the four large boats moored on the shore and numerous sandy footprints heading inland. Amber’s dad was right – demolished lair or not, something was happening on Ergo Ego’s island.
Amber stared out of the cockpit. All she could see were palm trees and distant mountains.
Wait here, her dad had told her. If I’m not back in an hour … just go.
Amber waited for a full eighteen seconds before she hurried after Spynosaur.
“I spy with my little eye…” muttered Amber as she scrambled through the bombed-out wreckage of Ergo Ego’s old secret lair. It was hard to miss, although nothing but debris remained after Department 6 blew it to smithereens. Amber was careful to move slowly – not just because it looked like the island had visitors, but because she didn’t want to get caught by her dad and have her sidekick privileges revoked.
“I spy…” Amber whispered again, following her father’s distinctive footprints through a sea of dust and rubble. Then she spotted something … something oddly out of place. In the middle of the rubble stood a large sign, which read:
“This way?” said Amber, glancing downwards. There, embedded in the ground, was a large steel disc, like a manhole cover, with a red button in its centre. Amber pressed the button with her foot.
With a VMM-KLUNK! the cover dropped open, revealing a hole plunging into darkness. Amber peered inside.
There was a ladder.
“Another secret lair underneath the first secret lair… A lair-within-a-lair!” noted an impressed Amber. Then she took a deep breath, pulled up her sleeves and clambered down into the darkness.
The long climb led to a dimly lit corridor, which in turn led to three more corridors. Amber tiptoed towards a distant blue light until she reached a large pair of double doors, open just enough to let the illumination from inside pour out. She edged towards it and heard a familiar voice.
“Welcome to my inner sanctum! Does everyone have what they need? We have an assortment of savoury nibbles, plus those irresistible little tubs of ice cream. Please, make yourselves comfortable…”
“Ergo Ego…!” whispered Amber. She peered through the doorway into a large steel-grey room, with high metal gantries stretching round its perimeter. A small army of black clad henchmen lined the walls beneath them. In the centre of the room was a long stone table, round which sat four figures. At the head of the table sat Ergo Ego, shuffling excitedly, the room’s bluish light glinting off his egg-shaped head.
“I’m not going to lie, this is a very exciting day for me! P.O.I.S.O.N.’s most vile and villainous, here in my secret island lair-within-a-lair!” said Ego, dabbing his brow nervously. “Fandango Scaramoosh, Shady Lady, Gums Gambino … your names are synonymous with sin! The greatest criminal masterminds the world has ever known! You have fingers in every pie and thumbs in every bowl of soup…”
Amber peered closer. Her father was right – P.O.I.S.O.N.’s high command was here!
“Get to da point, ya mook! Where’s the McGuffin?” added the inhumanly broad-shouldered Gums Gambino, his loose lips flapping like a fish out of water.
“What the massively mouthed mobster means,” added Shady Lady, her willowy frame shrouded in darkness, “is that we are ready and waiting for the reveal of your super-secret weapon.”
“And it had better be good,” added Fandango Scaramoosh, his pearl-white suit and silvery quiff of hair shimmering. “This is the twelfth time you’ve tried to join the Persons of Infamy, Spite and Occasional Notoriousness, Ego. What in the name of my hairdresser’s cat makes you think we’ll let you join this time?”
“Because this time,” Ego replied, “I can defeat your greatest enemy.”
The room fell silent. Amber held her breath.
“We have enemies coming out of our ears, Ego,” said Shady Lady. “Last month my milkman tried to murder me…”
“Enemies, perhaps,” replied Ego. “But none like Spynosaur.”
“Don’t even say dat name what you just said!” growled Gums Gambino, slamming his fist on the table. “Half my goons are doin’ a stretch in th’ Big House ’cos o’ dat scaly mook!”
“He’s ruined more rackets, prevented more plots and foiled more felonies than I care to count,” added Shady Lady.
“To put it bluntly,” added Fandango Scaramoosh, “he’s a prehistoric pain in the—”
“Exactly!” said Ego. “For the last year, Spynosaur has been the bane of your existence. Whenever you are about to do something, oh, I don’t know … diabolical, there he is, ready and waiting to spoil your day.” Ego looked up at the gantries high above them. “Isn’t that right … Spynosaur?”
Amber clamped her hand over her mouth to silence a gasp and looked up. Crouched on one of the gantries, as still and silent as a photograph, was her father.
“I can totally see you up there, you know!” Ego declared. “I mean, you’re a dinosaur – you’re like the least inconspicuous spy ever.” He picked up a bowl of Twiglets from the table. “Come down and join the party! The nibbles are to die for…”
Amber saw a flash of movement and sharp teeth as Spynosaur leaped down from the gantry. He landed in the middle of the table and let out a deep, hissing snarl.
“A quintet of criminality,” Spynosaur growled. “The game’s over for all of you!”
“Over? I’m just getting started! Or rather, you are,” said Ego with a grin.
He gestured at the thirty or so henchmen surrounding them. They drew knives, knuckledusters, baseball bats – one even brandished a folding chair. “I know they’re not technically my henchmen to command,” added Ego, “but if I may be so bold … get him!”