Connor woke slowly, aware of two things. First it was way too early, and second, Kelsey was no longer in bed. The low murmur of her voice pulled him the rest of the way from sleep. “Everything’s all set, and I’ll be there to oversee the decorations and food.” A slight pause followed. “Must be a bad connection. I’m—outside. I’ll run out and get the cake right before the guests arrive. Yes, I’ll make sure to leave plenty of time. Can I talk to Emily for a second? Oh, right. Of course. She needs her beauty sleep. I’ll see you in an hour. Okay. Forty-five minutes. Bye.”
A narrow shaft of light sliced through the curtains, and in the muted glow he watched Kelsey slip on her shoes. He didn’t move or make a sound, but something must have given him away. She stiffened slightly and glanced his way as she straightened. “Hey,” she said softly. “I was trying not to wake you.”
She pushed her hair behind her ear in a nervous gesture, and Connor felt a flicker of annoyance. What was she going to do? Slip away while he was still sleeping? And why the hell would that bother him? It wasn’t as if he hadn’t done the same thing before. But that was before, and those women weren’t Kelsey, and he didn’t want her to go.
A knot twisted in his stomach at the thought of asking her to stay. The memory of his mother’s sad smile as she walked away time and time again flashed in his mind, and the words jammed in his throat. He fisted his hands against the mattress and pushed into a sitting position with a glance at the clock. “It’s not even seven.”
Her gaze fell from his to land on his naked chest and then cut away to search out the purse she’d left on the couch, but not before he’d seen something in her eyes that made the knot in his stomach tighten.
“I know it’s early, but Emily’s shower is this morning, and I have to oversee the decorations and the food and—I’m sorry.”
Connor wasn’t sure why she was apologizing—for the early hour, for leaving, for Emily’s shower…or for the regret he’d seen in her eyes.
He’d known Kelsey would regret sleeping with him, but he’d taken her at her word when she said she wanted him. He’d believed her because—hell, because he’d wanted to believe her. But that was last night. Now, in the full light of day, with the Charlene Wilson calling the shots, everything changed.
Or, he thought grimly, everything was the same. Only this time it was Kelsey lying to the Wilsons, sneaking behind their backs to see him. It was Kelsey who pretended her relationship with him didn’t exist. Familiar ground, but it hurt a hell of a lot more the second time around. And not because she’d torn open old wounds. Emily had damaged his pride, but this—this felt like something else entirely.
Tossing aside the sheet in an obvious reminder that last night had happened, Connor swung his legs over the edge of the mattress and stood. Some other time, he might have teased Kelsey about the blush blooming in her face. But not this morning. Not when the heat signaled a different kind of embarrassment. He jerked on his jeans as quickly as he’d stripped them off the night before, annoyed by his body’s reaction to the mere thought.
“I’m going to talk to Emily about the wedding—”
“I don’t give a damn about the wedding,” he said, surprised by the truth of the words. He was still worried about Emily, but as far as proving the Wilsons wrong about Dunworthy, proving them wrong about him, Connor no longer cared. Only Kelsey’s opinion mattered, an opinion suddenly in doubt.
“I’m sorry,” she repeated, before lifting distraught eyes to his.
Yeah, he got that part. She was sorry they’d slept together.
“Last night was…”
Connor’s jaw clenched, waiting for the word he knew was coming.
“…amazing, and I’d give anything to stay in bed with you—”
“Wait? What?”
“Last night was amazing.” Color flared brighter, nearly blotting out her freckles as she ducked her head. “At least I thought it was, but I’m not—”
Swallowing a curse, Connor pulled her into his arms as realization hit him like the slap upside the head he deserved. Kelsey’s reactions hadn’t been fueled by regret or embarrassment but by a vulnerability that played against his own insecurities. “Last night was amazing.”
The memory combined with Kelsey’s soft curves pressed against him, her warm breath feathering across his chest, was enough to remind him just how amazing.
“It was,” Kelsey whispered. He heard the relief in her voice, felt her smile against his skin.
“This morning could be even more amazing.”
“I know.” Despite the apparent agreement in her words, her smile fell away, and this time, he knew he wasn’t imagining the regret in her voice. Pulling out of his arms, she said, “And that’s why I have to go. Because whether you give a damn or not, Emily’s wedding is a week away and then you’ll be going home.”
She was talking about L.A., but home didn’t bring to mind images of his sterile apartment. Instead, he thought of Señora Delgado’s restaurant, he thought of his friendship with Javy, and he thought of every moment he’d spent with Kelsey…and he wondered what might happen if he didn’t go back to L.A.
“Kelsey—”
“So, see? I have to leave,” she continued despite his interruption. “Last night was an amazing moment, but it wasn’t meant to last, right?”
The hope in her eyes waited for him to contradict every word she’d said, to tell her sometimes amazing moments added up to a lifetime, but he couldn’t make himself say the words.
Ducking her head, Kelsey grabbed her purse off the couch and left. And even though the sound of the closing door slammed into his chest like a blow, Connor let her go. Because when it came right down to it, he was the one too afraid to ask her to stay.
Connor didn’t have a destination in mind when he climbed behind the Mustang’s wheel, but he couldn’t stay in the hotel room any longer. Fortunately, Javy’s car seemed to have a mind of its own, and he soon turned into the Delgado parking lot.
The restaurant wouldn’t open for hours yet, but Connor knew Maria would already be in the kitchen, stirring giant pots of tortilla soup and prepping food. He pulled around back, the crunch of gravel beneath the tires the only sound, a sharp contrast to the night he’d brought Kelsey here when music and laughter filled the sultry air.
A metallic glint caught his eye as he climbed from the car, and he spotted a motionless wind chime made from silverware. Despite his mood, Connor smiled as a memory came to him. Furious with Javy over some scrape he’d gotten into, Maria whacked the counter with a carved spoon. The aged wood splintered on contact, adding to his mother’s anger, and she’d threatened Javy with the dire prediction that if the restaurant closed, it would be all his fault; after all, how could she cook without her favorite spoon?
The statement was a meaningless heat-of-the-moment comment that had come far too close to coming true years later. Not because of a broken spoon, but due to the expenses that followed Javy’s father’s illness and the fire that had nearly destroyed the kitchen.
A faint humming broke into his memories, and he found Maria standing at the counter, vegetables piled high in front of her, the quick, continuous motion of the knife a steady rhythm to the song she sang beneath her breath. The rustic Delgado family recipes went back for decades, but the remodeled kitchen was completely modern with its stainless-steel counters and appliances.
Maria’s face lit as he stepped inside the kitchen. “Connor! This is a surprise.”
“I wanted to apologize for taking off without saying goodbye the other night.”
She waved aside his apology with a flick of her knife before starting in on a jalapeno pepper, but curiosity lit her eyes as she said, “You and your Kelsey were in a hurry, no?”
Her words wiggled like bait on a hook, but Connor didn’t bite. His silence wasn’t enough to make the señora pull in her line. Watching him from the corner of her eye, she added, “That is how it is when you are in love.”
Love. The word sent a flare of panic scorching through him like the grease fire that nearly destroyed the restaurant years ago. “Kelsey and I aren’t in love.”
Maria glared at him like she might toss him back into the water. “I was married to my Miguel for over twenty years. I know love.”
Connor knew love, too. He knew the pain of losing a mother who loved him yet left him no matter how many times he asked her to stay. He knew the heartache of losing Emily, who claimed to love him but not enough to defy her parents. And Kelsey…would loving her be any different? If he told her the truth about the money he’d taken, money he’d used to save the restaurant, would love be enough to make her understand? Would it be enough for her to stand up to the family who’d taken her in when she was sixteen and scared with nowhere else to go?
“You don’t understand, Maria. Kelsey’s a Wilson. She’s Emily’s cousin—”
“And you think Kelsey is a foolish girl like Emily? Unable to think or do for herself?”
“No, she’s not like that at all. She’s used to taking care of herself and the people around her.” He’d seen that at her shop, in her concern for her friends. Friends who had Kelsey’s complete loyalty. Friends who deserved that loyalty.
Connor tried to picture Lisa or Trey fitting in at a Wilson family gathering and couldn’t. Just as he couldn’t imagine Kelsey caring what the Wilsons thought or ever, ever turning her back on her friends. Kelsey might not have wanted to follow in her mother’s footsteps, but the path had led Kelsey to be a strong, independent woman. A woman who knew her own mind and knew what she wanted.
Suddenly it didn’t matter if the Wilsons admitted they’ve been wrong about Dunworthy. It didn’t even matter if they admitted they’d been wrong about him. All he cared about now was proving Kelsey right. She believed in him, and last night she’d wanted him. Now it was up to Connor to tell her the truth about the money he’d taken from her family and convince her she wanted more than a moment, that he could give her more. It was up to him to convince her that, together, they could have forever.
Kelsey struggled through the front door of her aunt and uncle’s house, a huge bouquet of pink and silver helium-filled balloons trailing behind her. The carved wooden doors swung shut, catching one of the balloons in the jamb. She jumped as the loud-as-a-gunshot pop guaranteed her arrival wouldn’t go unannounced.
“Kelsey. I expected you half an hour ago.”
Okay, so she wouldn’t have snuck in unnoticed anyway. “Sorry, Aunt Charlene.”
“Where have you been?”
“With Connor.” The truth popped out before the words even formed in her head, and she couldn’t imagine what possessed her to tell the truth.
His image flashed in her mind, and she knew exactly what possessed her. She’d seen the look in his eyes when he’d caught her on the phone with her aunt. When he caught her lying to her aunt. If she wasn’t such a coward, she would have told the truth when it mattered.
Just like she would have stayed with Connor that morning, in his hotel room, in his bed, with the courage to believe they could turn one night into something more.
Disapproval cut into Charlene’s features, and Kelsey knew her aunt didn’t think Connor was good enough for a Wilson—any Wilson—but she knew the truth. She didn’t deserve Connor.
“You’re wrong about him,” she announced, certainty backing ever word. “Connor’s a good man. He isn’t here to ruin Emily’s life. He’s here because he’s worried she’s marrying a man she doesn’t love to please you.”
Her aunt didn’t speak. Kelsey thought maybe her words had made a difference, at least given her aunt pause. But Charlene’s gaze never wavered, and as the silence grew, Kelsey knew her aunt wasn’t using the silence to consider what Kelsey said. She was using the silence to make Kelsey reconsider what she’d said.
But she wasn’t going to back down.
It was time for both her aunt and uncle to realize Connor was a good man, not some troubled kid out to steal their daughter. And they needed to let Emily go. To let her live her own life and to stop using one youthful indiscretion to keep her in line.
“Do you really think I can’t see what’s going on?” her aunt questioned on a sigh. “Connor McClane is out to stop Emily’s wedding, and he’s using you to do it! Honestly, Kelsey, I expected you to know better.”
“Connor isn’t using me. He wouldn’t do that. I understand why you’d have a hard time believing he cares for me after how crazy he was about Emily—”
“Oh, for goodness’ sake, follow me.” Without checking to see if Kelsey would obey, Charlene turned on a heel and strode down the hall into Gordon’s study. Kelsey reluctantly followed. “Connor wasn’t in love with Emily any more than he’s…”
In love with you. Her aunt’s unspoken words bounced off the darkly paneled walls, hanging in the room like the scent of Gordon’s cigars.
“The only thing that man has ever worried about is himself.” Crossing the room to open a desk drawer, she pulled out a manila folder. “When your uncle kept this for proof, I always thought Emily would be the one we’d show it to.”
“Proof of what?” Kelsey asked uneasily as Charlene fingered a small rectangle of paper. The letters her uncle had written her mother had been shock enough. What else did her aunt and uncle have stashed away in desks and dressers?
“Proof of the kind of man Connor McClane really is.” Charlene gazed at Kelsey across the polished mahogany surface, her gaze reflecting a hint of sympathy. “He must be very convincing. Emily was sure he loved her.”
Kelsey didn’t have her cousin’s certainty. Connor had never mentioned the word love. But then again, neither had she, and Kelsey could no longer deny her feelings. She was in love with Connor. For a moment, she imagined saying the words out loud and punctuating them with a bold exit. Not needing any proof of the man Connor was aside from the truth written in her heart. But she wasn’t that strong.
“What is it?” she whispered.
“See for yourself.” Charlene slid the paper across the table. Kelsey stepped closer. It was a check. She recognized her uncle’s signature, his name and address printed on the top left, the zeros following the number in the small box off to the right. But it was the person the check had been made out to that froze her gaze. Her stomach, which had been tossing back and forth, sank.
“Why do you think Connor left all those years ago? He might not have had Emily, but believe me, he got what he wanted.”
Her hand shaking, Kelsey reached out and turned the check over. Connor’s name was sprawled across the endorsement line. She stared at the signature rather than meet her aunt’s knowing gaze. “That was a long time ago. Connor isn’t the same person anymore.”
Ten thousand dollars. A lot of money, but not enough to make a dent in the family fortune. Had her father held out for more? Kelsey wondered. Even twenty-four years ago, ten thousand dollars didn’t go far. Ten years ago, it wouldn’t have bought a new car.
“Is that what he told you? That he’s changed?” Her aunt’s cultured voice didn’t reflect even a hint of disparagement, but Kelsey heard it all the same.
“He was a kid back when he was seeing Emily.” An orphaned kid from the wrong side of the tracks. Could she blame him for taking the money? He’d told her how he’d struggled after his mother died.
But he didn’t tell you about the check, a worried voice protested. She’d told him about the money her father took to abandon her and her mother, and Connor never said a word.
“Let’s look at the way he’s changed. Ten years ago, he nearly ruined Emily’s life by convincing her to run away from her family with him. Now he’s back, and this time he’s out to ruin her life by convincing her to run away from her fiancé with him.”
“That’s not true,” Kelsey argued against the ache in her chest. “He’s concerned about Emily. Just like I am. She’s making a mistake by marrying Todd.”
“If I were you, I wouldn’t be worried about Emily or Todd. I’d be worried about Connor McClane.”
Kelsey wasn’t sure how she made it through the shower. Probably thanks to her aunt’s attention to detail. By following Charlene’s every instruction, Kelsey moved by rote. She arranged the flowers and decorations; she picked up the cake and double-checked the catered finger food. She walked the guests through the games—silly, irreverent, last-days-as-a-free-woman tributes—followed by opening gifts.
Even in her dazed state, Kelsey could guess what each package contained. After all, she’d helped with the bridal registry, and no one would dare step outside the approved gift list. No surprises, just as her aunt demanded.
Charlene planned for every contingency. Even Connor McClane, Kelsey thought, her heart catching as his signature seemed to flash in front of her eyes, written by an unseen hand.
“Thank you, Kelsey! It’s beautiful.” Emily held up a snow globe. Strains of the wedding march filled the room as sparkling “snow” fell on the bride and groom waltzing through a wedding wonderland.
Kelsey offered a weak smile. She’d bought the gift B.C.—Before Connor. She couldn’t not give her cousin a gift, but she felt as uncertain about Emily and Todd as she now did about Connor.
Kelsey had started to believe him, to trust his gut, as he called it, but now she didn’t know what to believe, and her own gut was pitifully silent. “You’re welcome, Emily. I just want you to be happy.”
Emily masked the flicker of doubt with a wedding-portrait smile. “I am happy, Kelsey. I’m getting married!”
A half an hour later, as the guests were leaving, Kelsey started collecting the plates and utensils, her movements automatic and unthinking. She blinked in surprise when her aunt laid a hand on her arm.
“The maid can get that, Kelsey.”
“It’s my job—”
“And we’re your family.” Her expression softened to a degree Kelsey had never witnessed. “You’re a beautiful woman in your own right, Kelsey, and I’m sorry if I’ve made you feel less than my own daughters. But there’s only one thing Connor McClane is interested in, and it’s not true love.”
Kelsey debated calling Connor, but the conversation wasn’t one she wanted to have over the phone. Stopping by his hotel room was out of the question. She’d come alive in Connor’s arms the night before, letting go of the past and all her insecurities. But seeing proof of the money he’d taken, the past was in painful jeopardy of repeating. The insecurities Connor lifted with his seductive words and intoxicating touch crashed back down, hitting harder than ever. Making her question if last night had been as amazing as she’d thought…
Kelsey hit the brakes a good twenty feet shy of her driveway. The black Mustang was parked at the sidewalk, the right front tire bumped up on the curb. Mirrored glasses shielding his eyes, Connor leaned against the hood.
Ready or not, she was going to have to confront him about the money he’d taken. It wasn’t something she could pretend hadn’t happened. Nerves jerked in her stomach, and she carefully eased her foot back on the gas, her car crawling the last block.
Connor grinned as she stepped out of the car, and aching or not, her heart still sped up as he approached. Maybe he had a reason, an explanation for taking the money.
And a reason for keeping the truth from her?
Kelsey could forgive something that happened ten years ago, but why hadn’t he told her? Why did she have to face the shock of another family secret?
“Hey, I went by to see Señora Delgado. You have an open invitation, and she made me promise that next time, I’d actually let you stay and eat.” Connor stuck his hands in the pockets of his jeans, a hint of uncertainty in his stride weakening her resolve as she wondered what else he’d talked to the older woman about.
“Connor—”
“She likes you,” he added with a crooked smile, “but then, who wouldn’t?” His smile fell away when she didn’t respond, and he stripped off his glasses. Worry shone in his emerald eyes. “What’s wrong?”
“Wrong?” Kelsey echoed with a broken laugh, the word far too simple to describe everything that had happened. Her decision to trust him, to sleep with him, to defend him to her aunt…only to find out he was just like her father.
It was a long time ago, her heart argued. Maybe he had a good reason. Maybe—
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Tell you what?”
“The real reason you left all those years ago. Why didn’t you tell me about the money?”
A muscle in Connor’s jaw flinched as if she’d slapped him. Kelsey wasn’t sure what she’d expected—excuses, denials—but she hadn’t counted on the dead silence that followed her words. The sun beat down on them, magnifying the pain in her head. Cicadas in a neighbor’s tree started to buzz, a low pitch that soon revved louder and louder, building like the hurt and anger inside Kelsey until she couldn’t keep from lashing out.
“I told you about my father—about the money he took to leave my mother, and you never said a word! I trusted you, I believed in you, I—”
Love you, she thought, her heart breaking as Connor stoically withstood her verbal attack. If not for that very first flinch, she wouldn’t have even known he was listening.
Surely if he had some reason, some justification for taking the money beyond pure and simple greed, he would tell her. He would say…something, anything! But silence—guilty silence—was Connor’s only response.
“My aunt and uncle were right about you all along,” she whispered. Just as her grandfather had been right about her father. “They were right about everything.”
At her words, Connor finally reacted. A cruel, calculating smile curved his mouth, and though Kelsey never would have thought green eyes could be cold, a chill touched her as his gaze iced over. He looked every inch the bad boy her aunt had warned her about less than two weeks ago. If only she’d listened.
“Congratulations, Kelsey. Your family must be so proud. Seems like you’re a real Wilson after all.”
Muttering a curse beneath his breath, Connor stalked over to the car. Despite the weight of restrained sobs pressing on her chest, Kelsey let him go. She might have lived her life under the misconception of her and her mom against the world, but Connor was just as deluded, believing it was always him against the Wilsons. This wasn’t about her family; it was all on Connor and the secret he’d kept.
“Mama’s right. You look like hell.”
Ignoring his friend’s voice, Connor didn’t look away from the production of sliced limes, saltshaker and shot glass he’d filled with tequila. He’d taken over the small outdoor bar at the back of the Delgados’ restaurant, where they’d installed patio seating for times when the weather was nice. In the middle of June, even at eight o’clock at night, it wasn’t.
He barely noticed the oppressive heat, the way his T-shirt clung damply to his skin, or the bugs that hovered around the string of multicolored lights. After shaking out salt on the back of his hand like it was rocket science, he reached for the shot glass.
Catching Connor’s wrist, Javy asked, “How many of those have you had?”
Connor glared at his friend from the corner of his eye. “Counting this one? Two.”
His friend barked out a laugh that ended in a curse as he let go. “You’re in worse shape than I thought. Wanna tell me what happened?”
Wincing at the strong burn of the tequila, Connor replied, “You said it yourself when I brought Kelsey here. Some people never learn.”
“Sorry, man.”
Javy didn’t say more, and the two of them sat without speaking. Mariachi music, the din of the diners, and the occasional shout from the kitchen were the only sounds.
Finally Connor shoved the shot glass aside. “It was Emily all over again. I was stupid enough to think things would be different this time. But when push came to shove, she sided with her family.”
He’d seen the disappointment in Kelsey’s eyes. Forget all she’d said about how he’d changed. Forget all they’d shared. She’d been waiting all along for him to show his true colors, and she’d jumped back to her own side of the tracks the minute his character came into question.
You should have told her sooner, his conscience berated him. If she hadn’t found out the truth from Charlene…But would that have made a difference? Or would Kelsey’s reaction have been the same?
He should have known he and Kelsey didn’t have any chance at a future. Her family’s disapproval would eat like acid, weakening Kelsey’s feelings until they were worn clean away. He was lucky it had happened sooner rather than later. He couldn’t stand to live life with Kelsey the way he had with his mother, always knowing she had one foot out the door and it was only a matter of time before she left and didn’t come back.
“Wanna tell me what happened?”
“Her aunt told her I took money to leave town, to leave Emily.”
“And she believed it?” his friend demanded, slumping back against the bar stool in disbelief. “Just like that? With no proof, no—”
“The Wilsons had all the proof they needed. I took the ten thousand dollars.”
Shock straightened his friend’s spine. “You what? But why would you—” Realization slowly spread across his features, along with a large dose of guilt. Javy swore. “Is that where you got the money you gave my mother for the restaurant?”
“Like you said, this place means everything to Maria. I couldn’t let her lose it.” Eyeing his friend closely, Connor said, “You never asked where I got the money.”
“No, I never did.” Javy let out a deep breath, reached for the bottle of tequila and poured himself a shot. For a long moment he stared into the glass before looking Connor in the eye. “I didn’t want to know.”
“What? In case I’d broken the law? Done something illegal?” Connor pressed. Well, why wouldn’t Javy believe that? It was just the kind of thing Connor McClane would have done.
Once.
“You think I didn’t consider it?” Javy shot back. “It’s my restaurant! My responsibility. My family—”
“Mine, too.”
“Yeah,” his friend agreed, frustration and anger draining away. “But I should have been the one to come up with a solution. And you shouldn’t be the one paying for it now.”
“I made my choice, and I would do the same thing again. In a heartbeat. So, tell me, you gonna drink that?” Connor asked, pointing at the shot glass sitting untouched between them.
Javy slid it across the bar without spilling a drop. “Look, man, I’ve been trying to pay you back for years. You’ve gotta let me—”
“Forget it. After all your family did for me, it was the least I could do.”
“Then we’ll draw something up. Make you a partner in the restaurant. And I’ll talk to Kelsey.”
Connor shook his head. “No.”
“What do you mean ‘no’?” Javy demanded. “Why don’t you want to tell her the truth?”
“She knows the truth. I took the money.”
“Oh, come on, Connor! That’s not the whole truth, and you damn well know it! If you told her why, Kelsey would understand.”
Yeah, maybe she would…this time. But what about the next time she had to choose between him and her family?