Chapter Five

Kelsey wondered if she’d even be able to taste dinner with Landry’s kiss living on her lips. She pulled away at the proper interval. Absurd, but was it possible to fall in love already?

Their gazes locked in sweet contentment. The pink moment had faded, but desire bloomed rosy and real in its place.

“Um. Nice.” Landry’s hands still rested on her shoulders, his face tilted enough to see shadows plane across his cheekbones. To see yearning and need in his eyes.

“Really nice,” she mumbled back in a voice that wore the same blush she felt on her cheeks.

“I better get dinner started, or we’ll never eat.”

She nodded at the invitation in his voice, but it was far too soon. When their gazes collided again, his flush let her know he knew it, too. “I’ve got Maggie’s recipe in my purse.” Her voice shook.

He grinned, bringing them back to the matters at hand. “Aw, not my first rodeo. I’m gonna use slices though, instead of dicing things.”

“Good to know. I am terrified of big knives.” True.

“A bad experience?” He smiled again as he set up a mandolin he’d pulled from a brand new box.

“Eeeeew.” She faked a shudder. “There’s another torture device. Reminds me too much of a guillotine. No, no bad experiences. Just pre-emptive, I guess. My dad tried his best, but it seems I always preferred cleanup. Which by the way, is how it should be tonight. The cook doesn’t clean.” She laid her hands on her hipbones in a very Maggie-like way.

“We’ll see about that.” Landry frowned a little. “You are my guest. Here’s a bowl. You rip up greens for a salad. They’re in the fridge.”

“I can manage that.” She opened the French doors to a very nice but not extreme member of his kitchen appliance family and pulled out arugula, spinach, and heirloom tomatoes. A pre-bagged mesclun with a label carrying the Amy’s logo. “I definitely feel like a vegetarian tonight.”

Landry deftly slid squash across the blade. “Tell me. What does your dad do that got him to cook?”

“He was a firefighter specialist. Retired now. Drove the big trucks. You don’t make it long in a firehouse without knowing how to feed your crew, and feeding them well.” She rinsed some spinach.

“Ah. What little guy doesn’t want to be a fireman?”

“Or little girl.” She chuckled. “Seems I took more after Mom, though. She’s a teacher. But I’ve always been a true daddy’s girl. He’s my ultimate hero.”

His expression tightened even though he smiled, and she realized she’d stepped on a landmine. “Oh, Landry. I’m sorry. I got lucky is all.”

“It’s okay. My old man taught me one thing. How I can be a better man. How about your brother?”

“He works for a media company in Westwood. Deals with a lot of Hollywood types.” She grimaced. “Not my cuppa tea, but he’s happy and has very flexible hours. Helps with two little ones around.”

“Sounds like you had it all growing up.” He started on the eggplant.

“Yeah, I liked how Dad’s shift calendar had him off some weekdays.” She gently bounced an heirloom tomato back and forth between her hands, remembering. “He could drive on field trips. Stuff like that. And nothing against full-time working moms, but I liked having mine home after school and off all summer. Guess it rubbed off.”

Kelsey finished the salad the same time Landry shoved the baking dish in the oven, another fine but not extremely high-end appliance, and poured more wine. Full-bodied red this time.

“Cheers!” Their glasses clinked.

“It’ll take about a half hour,” he said. “It’s still light enough outside. Want to take a little walk around?”

“Yeah.”

Leftover sunset slowly rolled down the hills. Landry whistled for Clint. The dog hurtled through some shrubs, apparently done with his day’s explorations.

“Isn’t it Clint’s dinnertime?” She knelt for a lengthy hugging session with the pup.

“Probably, but he never gives up on a stroll.” Landry helped her up and kept hold of her hand.

“All these lit candles?”

“Spoken like a fireman’s daughter. But watch this.” He reached for a tiny sliver of metal, held it out in different directions, and all the candles flickered off. “Remote control.” He rolled his eyes. “Christmas present from Amy.”

“Oh, the wonders of technology.” Kelsey grinned back, glad no wrangling on fire safety lay ahead. “I’ve got to tell her well done.”

“Amy. All Amy. They give off a vanilla scent, too.”

Shadows had started a slow crawl through the valley, graying the shoulders of the surrounding hills as they strolled across Winsome Hill. She totally got the name. A storybook of nature coming to life. Arms of live oak trees wrapped around the twilight, and reddish branches of Manzanita reached up to them. Rocks and boulders gathered like friendly garden ornaments. Around them, though, the air turned chill as if a switch had turned off.

Landry hustled her into his jacket and held his arm tight across her shoulders.

“It’s so beautiful here. And Amy’s close by. She seems like a great sister.”

“She is. She and Corky make my world a better place.”

As they neared the house, the kitchen timer chimed.

“Perfect time. Let’s eat.”

He relit the candles, and they dished up at the table. Seeing his mom’s little graffiti, Kelsey’s heart warmed.

“So you came back to Ten Oaks after your clothing career. Built a house. Does that mean you are sticking around?” She took a bite. “Delicious.” She settled against the antique chair, comfortable, at peace.

“Looks like it.” He hesitated. “I’ve got a contract renewal, but…the same time I think the wanderlust is over. I realize how stupidly overpaid I am. Just for looking good.” His face flamed. “Looking good in a pair of jeans, I mean. I do want peace, a homestead. But I think of the good I can do with my salary. I mean, even helping out charities like your rescue…”

He breathed out, ground some more black pepper across his salad. “I’ve considered leaving before. But something comes up, you know? Like our mom getting sick. I wanted the best treatment for her. Then setting up Corky’s college fund. Helping Amy improve technology…”

“Well, maybe it’s time to think about yourself. You deserve a chance to settle down.” Kelsey all but spilled the wine she was pouring. Had those grasping words actually come out of her mouth? Would he take it she hinted for more?

Well, maybe she was.

She rushed to another topic. “This is magnificent. I think Maggie’s recipe just might be bound for the cross-cut shredder. I might try this out on my parents next weekend.”

“Think you can handle a mandolin?” Landry’s grin hitched her breath because she knew he hinted at something else.

Kelsey wondered if she could speak. “I don’t even have one.”

Landry hesitated. “How about I bring mine over, help get you started?”

Her cheeks warmed under his intense gaze. “I’d like that. But only if you stay for dinner. I mean…” She figured the increased heat underneath her skin matched the intensity of brightening color on her face. “Even though it means…meeting my family.”

His eyelids slowly blinked, opened to an intense darkening of his champagne eyes. “I can’t imagine anybody I’d rather get to know.”

Her heart thudded with relief. Well, at least she didn’t have to depend on the success or failure of heart-shaped carrots to get to see him again. He won the battle for clean up, though, saying he’d tend to it later. Started the fire, started her fire. Led her to the couch, poured her more wine.

She cuddled against him when his arm snuggled across her shoulders. Night sounds blessed them, from the new walls settling in to the sleepy dog at their feet. Smooth jazz, which she’d never thought she cared for, sounded just about right.

Into the hard curve of his body, she realized there was no other place she longed to be. She reached up to touch the side of his face and cup his chin…rest her index finger in the cleft she found there and had ached to touch since their first meeting…

At first, his lips brushed hers with warmth, then hardened with heat, with promise, and opened with desire. The rush of their breathing beat in time with soft mellow saxophone. Oh, she ached for more but was far too cautious just yet to give it. Slow, sure, this time. Win the race…

And did he know her so well already so as not to rush? She didn’t want to leave but knew she couldn’t, shouldn’t, wouldn’t stay.

Not just yet.

Finally, reality and disappointment arrived in sad tandem. Her breathing slowed almost to normal.

“Landry, thanks for the perfect time.” Her lips lingered over his with good-bye. “I don’t want the evening to end. But I better head home. I’ve got to get up a six in the morning.” Slowly she disentangled herself from his inviting warmth.

“Aw. Feeding and mucking?” He rose, reached out for her hand and pulled her up against him. “I understand, but I so don’t want you to leave me.” His kiss mixed with the words, landed in her hair.

“I don’t want to leave you either, but Maggie is playing in the handbell choir. Eight o’clock service at Stillwaters Chapel. I…well, there’s just nothing as beautiful as handbell music. I…” Was the invitation in her voice as loud on the air as it rang in her head? Attending church together was somehow hot.

Disappointment clouded his eyes. “I’d love to hear it sometime. I’m as devout as the next guy, I guess. But Sunday mornings are traffic jams at Milk and Honey.” His fine large hands reached deep into her shoulders with a somehow gentle caress. “Weekend tourists want to take some country back home. Locals need fresh strawberries for their brunches. Amy needs me. She even drags sleepyhead Corky out of bed early.” His arms tightened. “I don’t want to rush things, but I sure want to see you again.”

I know. That’s one of the reasons I need to leave.

Kelsey thought quickly. He’d said the word, after all. “How about brunch at my place, then? When the farmers’ market slows down? I can handle eggs. No big knives.” She wanted to chuckle but heard only trembles.

“It’s a date.”Another kiss, delicious in its quickness. He moved to the fireplace to douse the flames and leave just dying embers. Slowly, she hoped, because he didn’t want to leave her side.

Outside, he helped her into his truck and tightened her seatbelt. “I’ll bring mimosas.”

His lids lowered in the sexy way that had started her heart thumping several times already. The drive to her place didn’t take long, but it was a drive she wanted to take forever. Had she been a fool to call the evening short?

“Coffee, please?”

“I better not. I won’t want to leave.” His face lowered for a last kiss. “Kelsey, I…I hate to say good-bye. And…” He looked away in something like confusion. “and I’ve got more to say.”

Goodness, way too soon for any kind of commitment, but did that mean he felt it too? That it might not be too soon to fall in love?

She touched her index finger to his lips. “Tomorrow. Tell me tomorrow. Whatever it is, you sound way too serious.” At her door step, she took him into her arms. “Tomorrow,” she said when she let go. “Tonight’s been so perfect. Let’s keep it that way. Sleep well, Landry.”

“I will. Because I promise to dream of you.”

The kiss was magic and music all at once. She tightened her arms around his neck, her fingers splaying against his wide warm shoulders. She could stay there forever, she knew it. Hoped he did, too.

“Good-night then,” she said, with more somberness than she wanted. “See you tomorrow. Time for beauty sleep.” Of course she was fishing, like a junior high kid…

“Well, you don’t need much of that.” His gaze on her the whole time, he strode back to his truck. She stood, watching, dreaming, feeling things long thought dead, while his tail lights disappeared into the darkness. Oak branches brushed through the shadows, and some sort of night bird murmured a lullaby.

But hot excitement burbled in her veins. Sleep, dreams? Not for a while. What had she been thinking? Why had she let him go? All she had now was pretending it was Landry when she held her pillows tight. Yet…her heart told her waiting was best. She still signed Caution as her silent middle name.

But she missed him already.

When she set her purse on the long table behind the couch, she knocked a family picture into her tumble of red pillows. Last year’s Christmas card picture of the Hunter clan. Hmmmm. An idea bloomed like mistletoe. What if…what if she supported the new man in her life and bought jeans for everybody? Did they have children’s sizes? Designs for women? Online shopping?

Wouldn’t Landry laugh tomorrow? And in spite of her claim of bedtime, all sleep had left her head, replaced by memories of his arms.

But for the life of her she couldn’t remember the brand name. No other choice but to Google the name of model Landry Mills.

What?

The Tall Timber Jeans spokesmodel burst onto her laptop screen in living color so real she almost smelled the wine on his breath. She expected Landry Mills to walk out into the room.

Her heart thumped to a stop.

That was why he’d been so familiar. Not due to some dumb TV show the world had forgotten. The search went on and on. Her mouse ran up and down the pad chasing sites. YouTube videos, magazine covers for the World’s Sexiest Man. Filmography of his television commercials, bit parts and cameos, talk show interviews. Advertisements in every imaginable language, and about a dozen that weren’t. What on earth? And he hadn’t managed to say a word?

Disappointment exploded at the secrets he’d kept. An honorable career didn’t seem a thing to hide. Gunnar had kept his life hidden, and Landry knew it. What on earth could Kelsey expect next?

Was the perfect evening destined to become the latest in her list of bad memories? She wiped away tears. No, not yet. She’d listened to every single word Gunnar had ever explained, after the fact. Landry Mills deserved the same. At least he’d never lied. But he didn’t tell her all.

Just like Gunnar.

Of course they had to have it out. She needed to hear him explain. But she needed to warn him, too, that he needed to come clean. And…texting was easy. Childish. Chicken. But she plucked at the tiny keyboard on her phone anyway.

Because if she heard his voice or saw his face, she’d melt at his feet.

****

Landry had started loading the dishwasher when his phone jingled with a message. His heart hammered. A text this late didn’t portend anything good. But Kelsey’s name showed up on the ID, and his blood pounded harder. Maybe she…missed him? Wanted him there? But no. His heart stopped, almost in defeat. Only three words.

Tall Timber Jeans?

Well, he had wanted to tell her. Tonight even. And she’d stopped him. Not that it was an excuse but…

Regret stomped on him. He cussed out loud. McClintock, warming in front of the fireplace, opened a sleepy eye. Of course. Landry’d take the pup along to her house as a furry defense mechanism.

After shrugging into his jacket and grabbing his truck keys, he whistled for the dog. Instinct urged him not to come empty-handed. Hmmm. Now was the right time, the exact time, for something else. He snatched the package he’d gotten at the kitchen shop just today.

The missed opportunity stabbed him same as the sliver of moon stuck itself into the hilltops. Kelsey herself had wanted a night too perfect…but was it too late now? McClintock licked Landry’s hand. The ten minute drive lasted a century.

Lights flickered in the back of Kelsey’s house, but he would have knocked anyway. And right now, a very timid knocking. The porch brightened as the outdoor light flicked on.

“Landry.” But she said it like a statement, not a question. Gaze direct. “Sorry for the text. I just didn’t want to talk.”

“Well, I do. Is now okay?” He gulped, hoping against hope.

“I guess. You’re here.” She looked away, shy but pleased. Like she had hoped he’d show up and now he had. “Come on in. Aw, Clint, too.” She bent down to hug the dog, who by his happy moans was falling in love with Kelsey all over again. “Sorry, precious. I don’t have any doggie treats. Next time, I promise.”

Next time? Well, that sounded hopeful. Landry’s spirits rose a little.

She was dreamy yet totally real in yoga-pant things like Amy wore, dark gray, with a lighter gray, loose but stretchy top with skinny black straps showing underneath at the shoulders. Hair tussled, like she’d run puzzled fingers through it. Dark gray eyes bright with curiosity, he hoped, not tears. No, please, not tears. How could his silence of self-preservation have become so destructive?

Because he, too, had wanted one perfect night.

“Coffee?” She flashed a glanced at him as she got up from the dog. “I’ve got decaf. Or tea. Or…” Her gaze grew bold now. “Wine?”

Wine might be his undoing, but if things went well, he’d be tasting it again on her lips. “Yeah. Please.”

“All right. There’s still some malbec.”

He followed her into the kitchen where she poured from the bottle she’d opened earlier. Handing him a stemmed glass, she kept her gaze directly into his, saying nothing. She sipped, and he ached to kiss the wine that pinked her lips. Her eyebrows rose as she sat at her dinette and gestured at him to do the same.

“Aw, Kelsey. I wanted to tell you. But it’s nothing I blab right off. I started to, early on. In slow spurts. And that’s what I wanted to tell you tonight. But you said the night was too perfect to get serious.” He guzzled to have something to do.

“Don’t you put this off on me. The Tall Timber Man isn’t exactly a porn star. It’s a pretty honorable profession if you ask me.”

His fingers tensed around his glass. “Kelsey, I’m back at Ten Oaks. For good. You just saw my dream house.”

“You also said you didn’t know if you were signing the contract.” She snapped her fingers against her glass. “You even said it’s tempting. For when finances get iffy, you always go back to it. “

“It hasn’t been a bad thing. To have options. You just said it’s not like I’m a porn star. Although I did get asked plenty of times.” He tried to laugh. “Honorable bit parts, too. I’m just tired.”

Her lips twitched. “I saw you on plenty of commercials. In every magazine I read. Yep, you make the women’s rags, too. That’s why you were so familiar. Not that TV show.”

“How…can I ask how you found out now?” Did he want to know? He drained the wine.

“You’re missing the point here.” She frowned, deep, and he wanted to kiss the wrinkles flat. “I had to find out on my own. Or maybe that is the point. I didn’t hear it from you.”

He shut his eyes for a second. “Amy told me to go slow. She knew your story. Small town. She didn’t want me to appear too—Hollywood. After Gunnar, you know.”

Kelsey chewed her lip as if he might be making sense. “So…you talked about me? When?”

“About thirty seconds after you drove off that day. The day you first asked about the heart-shaped carrots. Seeing you drive off…” He swallowed hard. “I wanted to see you again. No, I had to see you again. You mentioned you teach at Homewood. Corky goes there, too. I thought Amy might know who you are. Or how I could find you.”

“I told you about the horse rescue.”

He hung his head. “Amy said that was too stalker-y. Then you showed up to buy vegetables. I just…”

“Oh.” She blushed, and he hoped it was from happiness. “Well, I kind of get it. When I got home a while ago, I couldn’t sleep after all. I got this crazy idea to order your jeans for the family. I thought you’d get a kick out of it. I mean, everybody has online shopping. Maybe everybody could wear them when you all meet next weekend. But I couldn’t remember the brand.”

She paused; McClintock had click-clicked his way across the wood floors into the kitchen, and he rubbed against Kelsey in ecstasy. She petted him for a long while. “Now, I see why I didn’t remember. Because I never knew. So I Googled your name to see what came up.”

“You Google-stalked me?” His eyes glistened with amusement.

She groaned, took a sip. “It wasn’t like that. I don’t get online much. I mean, I haven’t even ‘liked’ you or Milk and Honey Farms on Facebook yet. I spend too much time at school on the computer. Loading attendance records, emailing uber-parents. Entering daily grades. Last thing I want is a computer in my private life.”

“So are you really mad at me? I’ll leave any time.” Oh it would hurt, and he didn’t think she’d really send him off but…

“No, not mad, exactly. And maybe not even hurt. Just…well, it’s hard for me to trust.” She plunked her glass down on the table. “I thought you might have picked up on that.”

“I did. That’s why I took things slow. And I knew the time was right. Now, I mean.” Landry chanced it, took her hand and held it against his heart. “It meant a lot to hear you wish Gunnar well. No matter how much he’d hurt you. To rejoice in the reunion of him and his kids. You know, what might my life have been like if my old man hadn’t gone off and start a new family with somebody else? My mom never held a grudge. Just like you.”

“I’m healing, Landry. Thanks to you. Or at least I thought so.”

“Have I blown it then?” He ached for her to feel the thump of his heart.

“Aw, Landry, I learned the hard way, about being with somebody who keeps secrets.” Her fingers danced a little against his chest. “I mean, you know that.”

“I do know. But I am not Gunnar. I wanted to speak up. Several times. But when it came to kissing you, I wanted that more.” He set his other hand across hers. “I didn’t want to spoil things. I wanted to keep things slow. You haven’t had much luck with…with celeb-types.”

“Well, I see you’re point. I do. But even still, I’d have felt better, knowing. You know?” Her finger landed on his chin, and her heat sparked the tips of his toes.

“Yeah, I do know.” He could hardly breathe. “That’s why it was actually a hard decision. Not to. I didn’t want to scare you off.”

“Well, even Gunnar didn’t scare me off. I’m here in Ten Oaks for the duration.”

“I meant…scare you off me.”

Her mouth opened into such a perfect O he could hardly restrain a kiss. Her hand stroked his, and heat settled deep down in his body.

“Oh. Landry, I didn’t think I’d be ready yet. Someday sure, but not quite yet.” Her gray eyes held his gaze. “Then I randomly go to Milk and Honey for a pretty foolish reason. And I couldn’t bear thinking I’d never see you again. I felt you all the way to my toes.” She glanced away, shy. “I mean, I don’t cook. And then I’m planning a menu full of vegetables so I could see you again. I get to the farm stand and it’s just Amy, and she’s adorable, but you weren’t there and I thought I’d sit down in the dirt and cry.”

He moved the chair and reached to hold her against his heart. Wanted to keep her there forever. “You can’t believe how happy I was. Riding down the hill on Big Jake, seeing you there. And to find out now, you were waiting for me…” His heart thumped so hard it hurt. “Kelsey, I am so, so sorry. It’s not a word I use lightly. Or carelessly. I use it only when I truly mean it. When I’ve been really, really bad.”

With one hand, he tilted her chin, hoping she drank in hope with the kiss. Her lips trembled beneath his.

“I’m not going with Tall Timber anymore,” he muttered against her mouth. “I can’t renew my contract. Not if it means losing you. I want what Amy and Deck tried to have. I can’t wait any longer. You never know when something might happen to wreck things.

She pulled away. “Like a secret?”

“I’m sorry.” The word came off his tongue easier this time. “But I want whatever we have to last at least a little longer. If you knew, wouldn’t you have thought I was just another Gunnar?”

“Like I’m thinking now?” But she laid her fingers on her mouth, like she wanted to hold the kiss there.

He kissed her again, quick. “I think you already know I’m not that kind of guy.”

“Landry.” He laid his hand on her cheek, and she let him. “Gunnar unraveled his baggage one string at a time. I don’t know what’s better. And then, I went through a very public breakup with somebody famous. Oh, maybe not Household Name famous, but somebody with big-time celebrity connections. I got hounded by entertainment magazines. Even at school. I…don’t want to be part of some gossip rag or celebrity blog.”

“Why would that happen?”

“Because I’ve lived it. Photographers would show up out of nowhere, and I’d just happen to be by Gunnar’s side. Google-stalk me sometime.” She chuckled but he heard bitterness as well as amusement.

He took her hand. “Kelsey, I’m sorry.”

“I know that, Landry. It’s just…I’ve made a quiet, good life her in Ten Oaks. I don’t want the bling and the sparkle. I don’t want to be part of gossip rags and celebrity blogs. Deep down, I’m a country girl who finally found her roots.”

His heart slowed down a little, but not much. “I never was that guy at all, Kelsey. Most of what you saw were photo-ops the company set up. Or honest gossip. It wasn’t a real date, me taking Ashley Milkweed to the CMA’s.”

“Really? The Grammy winner?” Her delicious mouth made another complete O.

“Yeah.” He couldn’t resist zooming in for another kiss. “Me in Tall Timber Jeans and an Armani tux jacket. Her in some outfit her ‘stylist’ picked out for her. All fake. We hardly spoke a word. I never saw her again. Honest.” He squeezed her hand. “And not because I don’t want to find somebody permanent. It wasn’t anything real. And I see why, now. Because you’re real. The real deal.”

“Did you mean it, just now? That you won’t renew your contract?”

“Yes.”

“But what if they really, really want you, and you really, really want to. Down the road sometime?”

He shrugged. “Models don’t last forever. They get old.”

“It doesn’t happen to men.” She rolled her eyes. “That cowboy actor, still doing truck commercials? He’s a granddad many times over.”

“Then we talk it through. You and me. No secrets.”

“No secrets. Because I don’t ever want to be in your way.” She blew out breath, and her wine-dark lips quivered. “You made an honorable living all on your own.”

“Well, not exactly. Some talent scout saw me on Heart to Heart. How could I say no? It paid off my student loans, got me through grad school. Then…you know the rest.”

She grinned. “Maybe I over-reacted a little”

“You mean that?”

“Never meant anything more.”

“All right then.” Landry scavenged in the package he’d brought with him.

“What’s that?” Kelsey peered at the pink paper bag marked with a turquoise logo. “Kitchen Contraptions?”

“Yeah. Did a little shopping myself this morning.”

Her eyes widened.

“Yup. Thought I might find those heart-shaped molds. I…wanted another reason to make sure I saw you again.” The blush streaking her face warmed his own. Whew. “Found these instead. I was gonna wait until Valentine’s Day…but.” He held out a cellophane-wrapped package containing conversation heart cookie cutters. Three. “Here. Read ’em and let me do some explaining.”

Kelsey ripped off the cellophane, then lay the large hearts on the counter. Her laughter hung like a cloud of glory on the air.

Love Lessons. Pick Me. Rude Boy.

Her brow furrowed in definitely kissable concentration. “Hmmm. I’d say they all fit the moment. But here’s the only one I need you to expand on.” Her gaze burned his. “And I don’t mean carrots.”

She held out Pick Me.

“Aw, Kelsey.” He pulled her tight again. “I already did.”

A word about the author…

A native Californian, Tanya Hanson loves life on the Central Coast with a real-life hero—her firefighter husband. Her son and daughter are the best thing she’s ever done, and two little grandsons now fill her days.

A city-slicker wagon trip around the Tetons and volunteering at the local horse rescue have proven to her the West is where she wants to write.

www.tanyahanson.com

www.petticoatsandpistols.com