YOU WANTED TO SPEAK WITH ME?” Derrek looked up from his laptop for a moment on the following Monday, then returned to studying the screen.
“Yes.”
Allison stood in the doorframe of Derrek’s office, her face set like flint. This would be the moment. He’d try to stall. Find a compelling reason to push off the conversation another day, week, month. No. Not today.
“About?”
“Finalizing the partnership. It’s been almost three and a half months, Derrek. You’ve been stalling, making excuses, and I’m tired of it. I know we talked about it last week, about your busy schedule, but I’d like to talk about the partnership now. I bumped into your wife on Wednesday and brought up the partnership, and she said she had no idea what I was talking about.”
“Yes, she mentioned seeing you at the grocery store.” Derrek nodded, his face full of mock concern. “And you’re right, it’s definitely been delayed.”
“Yes, it has been.” She stepped inside and closed his door. “Let’s take care of that.”
“I have a busy schedule this morning.”
“Yes, I understand that. So do I. And I’ll have one tomorrow and the next day and the next. So will you. Tyranny of the urgent. But this needs to happen now, not this afternoon or in a few weeks.”
Irritation flashed across Derrek’s face, then his countenance shifted to amusement, then went blank.
“I see.” He closed his laptop, pushed back from his desk, and motioned to the chairs in the corner of his office, then stood and meandered over and sat. Allison hesitated, then moved over and settled into the maroon chair across from him.
Derrek crossed his legs and nodded. “I know you’ve been frustrated at the length of time it’s taken to sit down and structure our agreement, and you would classify that as wrong, but that’s not truly the situation we find ourselves in. It’s been a valuable time. Time that has given us both time to think. Time to listen.”
“Think about what? Listen to whom?”
“Think about the partnership. Pray. Listen to wise counsel from God and from other people who know the company.”
“Like Linda?”
“Yes, she’s one of them.”
“What does she have to do with our partnership?”
Derrek gave her a puzzled look. “Since she runs the office, has her ear to the ground with the staff, with clients, she offers a unique perspective on this company. She’s been an invaluable part of my team since the day I hired her six years ago. Her insight has proved useful countless times.”
“I’m sure it has.”
“Good, good. I knew you’d respect her opinion on the workings of the company and how I cannot dismiss her sage counsel without careful consideration. Her bright light and gentle approach to people have been a seminal part of Wright Architecture’s success. I’m glad we agree on that.”
Spinning again. Yes, Linda ran a tight ship. But it was not from a well of kindness. And no, she did not respect Linda’s opinions.
“I didn’t say I—”
“And since you and I both agree her counsel should be held in high esteem, then this conversation could potentially be easier than I anticipated.”
Allison’s hands went cold.
“What is her counsel?”
Derrek folded his hands across his lap. “Her counsel is that you should not become a partner.”
“What?”
“That can’t surprise you. You haven’t exactly won her over to your side.”
Heat rose into Allison’s face.
“Also, as I just indicated, I’ve had a chance to ponder the idea of our partnership as well. I’ve prayed about it extensively. Sought the views of my brothers at church. With all those considerations in mind, I’ve come to the conclusion that you’re not ready, and consequently I’m not ready for you to become a partner in this company.”
Allison’s body went numb. “Are you kidding me?”
“But I do want to be clear on one thing.” He smiled as if he were about to give her winning lottery numbers. “This is quite possibly a temporary decision. I believe I can say with a fair level of certainty that you will indeed become a partner in this company someday. An extremely high likelihood. You’ve been doing excellent work. The clients you work with have commended you often.”
“Then why—”
“Consequently, my suggestion is we revisit this conversation in six months or so and see how we both feel about it then.”
Six months? Allison clutched the arms of her chair as if letting go would send her toppling to the gray carpet. She stared at him, Derrek now giving her a thin smile that seemed to say everything was exactly as it should be. This couldn’t be happening. But of course it could. She’d seen it coming, had known it was coming, but didn’t want to admit it. How could he do this to her? Lie to her? How? Simple. Lying was what Derrek did. It was who he was.
“I can’t believe you.”
“Oh?” Derrek stood and strolled back to his desk, sat, and opened his laptop. “Why is that, Allison?”
“You enticed me to come over here to be a partner. A partner. I never would have come simply to work for you. For anybody.”
Allison stood and paced, blood pulsing hard in her temples. “You said we were partners. I have your proposal. You wrote the word partner in memos and emails to clients for weeks after I got here. I saved those emails. It wasn’t a delusion on my part. You gave me your word!”
“Now, Allison, there is no need to get upset. What you have to consider is there are different definitions of the word partner. I consider everyone who comes to this office to work on common goals as a partner in the work we’re doing for our clients. When I hired you I did bring you on as a partner. And when I wrote those notes to clients, you were a partner, just as all of us working here are partners. I realize now—thank you for pointing it out to me—that your definition was different and continues to be different.”
Allison stared at Derrek, her mind blank. She hadn’t expected this conversation to be simple, but she hadn’t expected a spin of this magnitude either.
“Wait a second. On one hand, you’re saying Linda doesn’t want me to be a partner, which indicates you know exactly what the word means. You grasp the benefits and position that come with it, because she doesn’t want me to be one. On the other hand, you’re saying everyone is a partner.”
Derrek’s face went cold. “Let me repeat, everyone is a partner. For example, Linda considers herself a partner, as she should. In her arrangement, she receives a percentage of profits, but she does not own any percentage of this company. If you chatted with any number of the people who work here, they, too, would describe their positions as partners. Just as I hope you were doing, and of course I thought you were doing, up until this conversation.”
“No, Derrek. You’re not going to spin this one. All our conversations were about partnership in the same way Kayla and I were partners. Ownership of the company. Sharing profits. My definition comes from the one you gave me when we talked on the phone and you said you wanted me to be your partner. From the paper you showed me at The Vogue that said in writing I would get thirty-nine percent of the company. It comes from the fact I came from a partnership with Kayla and you knew exactly what my partnership was with her, and you knew I would be expecting the same thing when I came here.”
“Our expectations and reality are often quite different. Often we tell ourselves a story that is quite a bit askew from the facts of a situation.”
“Why did you lie to me?”
Derrek looked up from his laptop and gave a little chuckle.
“I never lied to you. We both knew going in that we were going to take time to see how you would best work at my company. We—”
“No. We did not know that. I was patient because I trusted you.”
“I’m glad to hear that.” He turned back to his laptop. “I trust you as well. But let me be clear. You’re not getting thirty-nine percent of this company, now or ever. As I said previously, at some point it might be God’s leading for you to become a partner and share in a percentage ownership in this company. But that time is not now.”
“I can’t do this any longer.” Tears rose to her eyes and she wiped them away quickly.
Derrek shut his laptop for the second time and folded his hands.
“This has been a profitable conversation, Allison. Let me explain why. I didn’t understand the depth of your belief that you were coming over here as a partner in the same way you were with Kayla. It would have been wise of you to procure a definition and clarify that definition in writing so we could be literally on the same page from the start.”
“We were on the same page! The one you showed me at—”
“However, your opportunity to do that has passed. Consequently, we need to determine a plan going forward. Perhaps your time here at Wright Architecture is coming to an end. I do not want that to be the case. I had hoped we would work together for many years. But I know money is something you have a great desire to have more of. That you want—”
“The money is not for me! I need—”
Derrek waved his hand. “Regardless of the motivation, you still find yourself in a position where you want more income. With that in mind, let me talk to Linda in the next few weeks and see if we can increase your salary somewhat a month or two from now.”
“I don’t have a month to wait, Derrek.”
He continued as if he hadn’t heard her. “In addition, if it would make you feel better, I have no problem adding the word partner to your business card. Perhaps we should make that offer to all who work here. What do you think?”
Allison’s mind reeled. Partner on her business card was supposed to placate her? And yet, if he was serious about an increased salary, should she stay? And if she didn’t, where would she go?
“Let me repeat, I want you to stay with me. And it’s evident to me that this conversation should have happened a great deal earlier. You will make partner, Allison. You will have a percentage of this company. It’s coming—I promise you that.”
A battle raged in her mind. Half of her wanted to release the inferno that was swirling through her; the other half shouted to be cautious. Five seconds passed. Ten.
“I’d enjoy chatting further, but I really must go, Allison.”
With that, Derrek strode out of his office without looking back.
Allison sat in her office after her talk with Derrek, no idea where she should go next. Gut it out? Gut it out for what? Even if she had it in writing that she’d become a partner on a specific future day, he’d find a way around it.
Ellie buzzed her from the front desk. “Allison?”
“Yes?”
“Phone call for you on line three.”
“Who is it?”
“Didn’t say.”
Take the call? Yes. It would distract her at least for a moment. She swallowed and closed her eyes for a moment. Game face on. Act professional whether you feel it or not.
“Hi, this is Allison Moore.”
“Hey, Allison, this is Micah Taylor. I have you on speakerphone ’cause Sarah’s here too. We met down in Cannon Beach.”
“Hi, Allison!” Sarah called out.
Allison’s breath whooshed out of her in a deep sigh. “I cannot tell you how timely your call is.”
“Really?” Micah laughed. “Why’s that?”
“Just another brutal day at work. You guys are a breath of desperately needed air.”
“Glad to help,” Micah said. “Listen, Sarah and I are going to be up in the area, and if you’re around, we thought we’d swing by, see where you work, take you to lunch and catch up.”
“Yes to all of the above, except the lunch part. My turn.”
“We might wrestle you for that,” Sarah said, “but we’ll wait for the battle till we get there.”
“When are you guys going to be here?”
“Eleven days from now, on the nineteenth. Will that work? Pick you up at eleven thirty?”
“Yes, I’ll see you then.”
Allison called Richard on the way home.
“Can we get together?”
“I’m sorry, Allison, I can’t. I’m in the middle of something that needs my full attention.”
“Can you talk now?”
“For only a few moments, I’m afraid.”
“I’m never going to be a partner. My mom is going to drown in debt. We don’t have the money to make this month’s payment, and my love life is nonexistent. I spoke to the dry bones, but they did not come to life.”
Allison changed lanes as Richard seemed to be gathering his thoughts.
“Tell me something you believed when you were young that you now know as impossible, but back then you had no doubt whatsoever that it was true.”
“What?”
“Tell me.”
“Flying.”
“Tell me more.”
“When I was a kid I knew I could fly. I didn’t believe it—I knew it. All I had to do was run fast enough. All I had to find was the right wind, and when I did I would catch it and fly. Not like a bird. Not way up in the air and for long distances, but for ten yards or twenty yards. Or I’d jump off a slide with my umbrella and float on a current across the park and land softly on the grass.”
“Yes,” Richard said. “That is the key. You must believe like that again.”
“But do I—”
“When boys and girls are young, they don’t think about their gifts and abilities and interests and desires. They simply act on them. They don’t judge them. They act. They don’t have to think about who they are—they simply are. They don’t worry about their true selves slipping away. But then they do slip away, and they don’t know how to find themselves again.”
“But how do I do that?”
“I’m so sorry, my dear friend. I must go. Believe, Allison, believe.”
When she got home, Allison’s first move was to check the journal. It had to have changed this time. Please! But there was nothing more than her ink stains from five days back on the page.
“Come on, God! What are you doing to me?”
No, the journal didn’t owe her anything. Yes, Richard was probably right, the journal was going to do what it wanted to, but really? No input at all after the past three entries? Why even have the thing? Why the ongoing silent treatment?
Sleep came slowly that night, and when it did it was accompanied by dreams of piles of cash just beyond her outstretched fingers.