“Do you want to go?” Becca asked me, putting a hand on my shoulder. Gripping the railing of the back deck, I stared at the sun, which was just starting to dip into the horizon. I couldn’t believe he had come here with her. He couldn’t do it for me, but for her?
“He said she didn’t mean anything to him,” I croaked.
“Look, they’re not necessarily back together. They just came here together,” Becca said.
She had a point. But his coming here with her was almost as bad as his getting back together with her.
“Same difference,” I muttered.
“I’m sorry, sweetie,” Becca said, smoothing my hair. “He’s just an idiot. They all are.”
“Big idiot,” I said with a sniffle.
“I’m gonna go find Brody and see if he can drive us back,” Becca said. “You gonna be okay?”
There was a huge sob choking my throat, so I nodded.
“I’ll be right back,” Becca said.
But when she turned around, she froze. Her hand suddenly gripped my elbow, and I turned around as well. Manette was standing right in front of us.
“Jenna! Becca! So good to see you,” she said with a welcoming grin—as if she owned the place. “Great party, huh?”
“Back off, Manette,” Becca said.
I wanted her to go away. I couldn’t look at this girl for one more second. How the hell had she gotten Kyle to come out with her? Had she hypnotized him or something?
“Jenna, listen. I know you saw me with Kyle, and I’m sorry,” Manette said. “But isn’t it better that you know now? Kyle isn’t over me, and I’m definitely not over him. You just have to accept it.”
“You’re wrong,” I snapped, my face overheating. “I don’t know how you got my boyfriend here, but it doesn’t change the fact that he’s my boyfriend.”
Manette, somehow, stepped even closer to me. So close, I almost choked on her musky perfume.
“Well, if he makes the circuit, which we both know he will, then he won’t be around to be your boyfriend, will he?” she said, almost whispering into my ear. Guess she’d finally decided to drop the sweet-little-me act. “Unless you plan on going to Hawaii—like I am.”
My jaw completely dropped. Manette leaned back to admire the fruits of her labor and was not disappointed. She had gotten what she wanted—total shock.
“You’re going?” I asked.
“Of course I am,” she said, lifting a shoulder. “I go wherever the surfers go. It’s my life. And what will you be doing while we’re traveling all over the world together, Jenna? Taking PE?”
I couldn’t believe this. There was no way I could compete. Not only was she gorgeous and self-assured, but she was utterly determined to get Kyle back. She was actually going to be there. With him.
“Ever heard of ‘out-of-sight, out-of-mind’?” she added, slamming a dagger right through my heart.
“All right, that’s enough, Barbie,” Becca said.
Manette ignored her. “I’m doing you a favor here, Jenna,” she said calmly. “If it’s not me, it’s gonna be somebody else. What do you expect him to do, stay faithful to you for months on the road? He’s gonna be a celebrity, Jenna. He’ll be able to have any girl he wants. There’s nothing you can do about it.”
I blinked. I hadn’t really thought about it. But now that she’d made me, I had to wonder. Did I expect him to be my long-distance boyfriend? It seemed completely unrealistic. And the very idea of Kyle with anyone else made me sick.
“You’re a nice girl, Jenna,” Manette said finally. “I’m just trying to help you face the facts.”
She patted me once on the shoulder, smiled almost apologetically, then turned and moved off through the crowd.
I shoved clothing, jewelry, beach towels, and makeup into my bag at random, barely able to see through the tears in my eyes. In the corner Becca spoke to our parents on her cell phone, whispering fervently.
“Okay. Yeah, she’ll be fine. Love you, too,” she said. Her cell phone snapped closed, and I looked up. “She says that a cab ride back to Malibu qualifies as an emergency, so we can, in fact, use the emergency credit card.”
“Thank you, Mom,” I said through my teeth.
“Are you sure about this?” Becca asked, holding her phone in both hands in front of her. “You don’t want to talk to him first? It’s still early. We can go back and find him.”
The very idea of even looking at Kyle right then made my heart seize up. I yanked the zipper closed on my bag and picked it up. “No. I just want to get out of here.”
“Okay then,” she said, shouldering her own bag. “Let’s go.”
We were turning toward the door when someone knocked. Neither of us moved.
“Jenna? Are you in there?”
It was Kyle. In the background I could hear a few other voices as people returned from the party.
“Should I get it?” Becca whispered.
“No!” I whispered back, my heart panicking. I actually looked at the window as a potential mode of escape, but then I remembered we were on the third floor.
“We’re gonna have to leave at some point!” Becca whispered.
“Uh…the walls are pretty thin,” Kyle said.
My shoulders drooped. Becca rolled her eyes and opened the door. “Hey, Kyle! What’s up?” she said, all bubbly.
“I was looking all over the party for you guys! Where were you—” Kyle stopped short when he saw our packed bags. His whole face creased with confusion. “Are you leaving?”
Becca looked from me to Kyle and back again. “I’ll just be outside,” she said. Then she shrugged at me and left, closing the door behind her.
“Jenna?” Kyle said, stepping closer to me. “What’s going on?”
I had been hoping to avoid this conversation, but now I knew there was no way out. It didn’t matter how cute he was or how much he seemed to care about me. This was about self-preservation. Old Jenna would have been so psyched just to have a boyfriend, she would have endured anything to keep him. But New Jenna had to look out for herself.
“I don’t think I can do this, Kyle,” I said in a rush. “I think we should break up.”
“What!?” he blurted.
“I mean, I know we’ve only been together for, like, three days, but—”
“Jenna, what is going on?” he asked, looking panicked.
“I know I said I’d stay this weekend, but you didn’t really want to leave for Hawaii all tied down, right?” I said.
He said nothing. Just stared. “Where is all of this coming from?” he finally asked.
“Nowhere,” I said quickly. “I was just thinking and—”
“I felt so bad after you left that I went to the party to apologize. Then I spent over an hour there looking for you, only to find out that you were here all along, and now you’re breaking up with me?”
“You went to the party with Manette,” I said. “I saw you guys. I saw her holding your hand, and I saw you hug her.”
Kyle looked at me as if I was insane. “When?”
“When you first came in!” I told him. “I’m not crazy, Kyle. I know what I saw.”
Kyle shoved his hands into his hair and paced to my bed, his eyes searching the floor. “Okay, Manette drove me to the party because I asked her to because everyone else was already gone. And, yeah, she grabbed my hand on the way through the door, but that’s just Manette. But I didn’t hug her. I—”
He stopped talking and snapped his fingers. “Wait a minute! I tripped into her, and she hugged me before I got my balance.” His brow knit, and he looked past me. “Damn, that girl is good.”
“So you’re saying you’re really not getting back together with her?” I said. “Even though she’s going to Hawaii with you? Even though—”
“Who told you that?” Kyle said, laying his hands out flat. “Did she?” His face was hard as stone. In that second I knew he understood everything. Maybe I could read him. A little.
“Freakin’ Manette,” he said under his breath.
Then he turned and ripped the door open.
“Kyle!”
He ignored me and stormed down the hallway toward a group of people standing near the stairs. A couple of them parted at his approach, and I saw Manette turn around.
“Kyle!” she trilled happily, oblivious.
He stopped right in front of her. His anger was so obvious, her friends backed up a bit.
“Stay away from Jenna,” he said through his teeth.
She shot me a look over his shoulder. An impressed look—like maybe she’d underestimated me.
“Kyle, whatever she said—”
“She didn’t say anything,” Kyle shot back, seething. “From this second on I want you to stay away from her and from me. Do you understand me?”
For the first time since I’d laid eyes on her, Manette looked thrown. She glanced around quickly before smiling again.
“Kyle,” she said in her wheedling tone. She reached up to touch his chest, and he lifted an arm to block her hand. Manette withdrew. She even took a full step back.
“I mean it, Manette. I’ll get a restraining order. I’ll skip the damn tour. I don’t care what I have to do as long as I don’t have to deal with you.”
One of Manette’s friends gasped, and another giggled. Honestly, I almost felt bad for the girl. I guess Kyle had officially decided not be so nice about this. And he was doing it for me. To protect me. Manette looked over at me, then stared at Kyle for a long, silent moment.
“Are we clear?” he demanded.
Manette narrowed her eyes. “We’re clear,” she said. “If that’s what you really want to settle for. I’m too good for you anyway.”
“If that’s what you want to believe, feel free.” Kyle walked over to me, cupped my face in his hands, and kissed me. It was firm and gentle and deep and tender and mind-melting all at once. In that moment I knew: I really was his girl.
I leaned back against the hotel wall with my head on Kyle’s shoulder, staring out at the waves and the stars. From where we sat, the terrace trellis broke up the view a bit but not enough to spoil the moment. The hotel was pretty quiet. Most of the people who had come back early had regrouped before heading out to other, later parties. Even Becca and Brody had gone out to meet the crew at some beachfront club. Manette and her friends had disappeared as well. From down below a reggae tune played at a respectable level, but other than that and the occasional door slam, it was actually quite peaceful.
“I can’t believe Manette is going on the tour,” Kyle said with a sigh. “That girl really needs to get a life.”
“Surf groupie, huh?” I said.
“Not a sustainable career,” he replied with a small smile.
I lifted Kyle’s arm and placed it over my shoulder, cuddling in closer. “I really don’t want to talk about Manette anymore.”
Kyle reached up and brushed his fingers through my hair. “I know, but she did bring up a good point. What are we going to do if I make it?”
I tilted my head to look up at him. “First of all, you will make it. And secondly, I think we just…stay in touch. Keep each other informed. See what happens.”
“You’re very Zen about this,” Kyle said. “I was thinking, if you date anyone else, I’ll kill the bastard.”
We both laughed.
“Well, whatever. I think you should just focus on tomorrow. We can figure it all out later.”
“I really like you, Jenna,” he said, looking at me with this intense admiration that turned my insides to goo.
“I really like you, too, Kyle,” I replied.
We leaned in for a kiss, but at that moment we heard a whoop and a holler from down below. The outdoor stair rail shook, and voices carried up on the breeze.
“They’re ba-ack!” Kyle sang.
“Oh. Goody,” I replied flatly.
We scrambled to our feet just as Jonas, Becca, Brody, and a bunch of other people arrived on the third floor. They came over and slapped our hands in greeting.
“Party over already?” Kyle asked.
“It got broken up,” Brody said. “Whatever. Sucked anyway. Bunch of people went trolling for another one, but we figured we’d come back and crash.”
Becca slid past the guys and took my arm, all giggly. I could tell she had some kind of plan up her sleeve. If she’d been wearing sleeves.
“Would you mind if I stayed in Brody’s room?” Becca whispered.
“What? You’re gonna sleep with him!?” I said under my breath.
“No!” She slapped my arm so hard, it stung. “It’s just we kind of want to stay up and talk and cuddle and stuff. Then maybe we’ll actually sleep. That’s all.”
“Okay. But if you need me, get me,” I told her.
“I will,” Becca promised, crossing her heart. “Jenna, you’re never going to believe this, but Brody’s going to Penn State in the fall! He’s gonna only be a couple hours away! I really think we might have something here.”
I glanced up at the guys. I couldn’t believe the depth of the unfairness here. I finally meet an amazing guy, and he’s potentially leaving in less than two days. Meanwhile Becca meets her twentieth amazing guy, and he’s a potential long-term boyfriend. Ridiculous.
“I’m really happy for you, Becca,” I said, trying to sound as sincere as humanly possible.
“Thanks. I am, too,” she said, gazing at Brody.
As if on cue, Brody broke away from Kyle and Jonas and grabbed Becca’s hand. “Shall we?”
He used his key and opened the door to the room he was supposed to be sharing with Kyle. They walked in together, leaving the door wide open for the moment.
“So,” Kyle said, moving in close to me. “Looks like I’ve been kicked out of my room.”
Just then a pillow came flying out and smacked him directly in the face. He caught it with both hands before it could fall to the ground.
“Looks like,” I said.
“Mind if I crash with you?” he said. “If those two are gonna be up all night anyway, I’d rather not be in there.”
My pulse started to race, and I warmed with anticipation. “Sure.”
Kyle smiled, and I led him over to the room I was sharing with Becca and Sun. Inside, Kyle placed his pillow on one of the two double beds and started fiddling with the alarm clock. My hand shaking, I quickly wrote Sun a note telling her to crash in another room so that she wouldn’t wake Kyle coming in all drunk at 4:00 A.M. I used one of the safety pins from her makeup case to attach the note to the warped metal frame around the room number outside.
I closed the door and took a deep breath. When I turned around again, Kyle was right behind me.
“Hey,” he said.
“Hey,” I replied, breathless.
Then he grabbed me and pulled me into an intense kiss. His arms circled my waist, pulling me to him, backing toward the bed.
Mayday! Too fast! Say something!
I pulled myself back and stopped. “Uh, Kyle? I can’t…you know…have sex with you. Right now. Yet. You know?”
Kyle blushed. “I know. That’s fine. I was actually just thinking a little more of this would be good.”
He kissed me again, and I melted into him. A little more of this would be really good.
“I thought you had to get to sleep,” I said, tearing myself away again.
Slowly he smiled. With his fingertips he brushed my hair back from my face and tucked it behind my ears.
“I think I can stay up for a little while,” he said quietly. So quietly it made my toes curl.
“Nice,” I said.
Then I kissed him again, and we fell back onto the bed.