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Graham let his hands fall to his side as Alice berated the two of them. Conall, frowning at her mouth as he lip read her tirade, relaxed. When Gizelle timidly put her muzzle into his hand, he gave a little shudder.
“I... apologize,” he said formally. “She was afraid and I reacted badly.” He knelt beside the gazelle, and she seamlessly shifted into her human form, arms around his neck as she sighed into the comfort of his embrace.
Graham realized he owed an apology as well, but scowling at Alice, he couldn’t find the words.
She didn’t want his protection.
She didn’t want anything from him.
And why should she? He didn’t have anything to offer her.
“S’okay,” Alice told Conall, after giving Graham a return scowl. “I think the earthquake scared her.”
Gizelle looked out from the shelter of Conall’s arms with big, frightened eyes. “They woke it up,” she said anxiously.
“Who, sweetheart?”
“The bad people without voices,” Gizelle said, then she buried her face in his chest and refused to speak.
Alice looked quizzically at them, then shook her head and went to collect her beer bottle, frowning at the wasted beer. “Okay then,” she said dismissively. “It was nice to meet you, I’m going to go find Mary and Amber and take a shower as soon as I’ve figured out what cottage I’m in.”
“Twenty-two,” Graham growled, grabbing a towel from behind the bar.
Alice gave him a hard look.
“You left your key,” he explained shortly as he went to mop up the spilled beer.
“Did you find my bra?” Alice asked, standing in his way with her hand outstretched for the towel.
Was it a joke? Was he supposed to laugh? Graham felt like he was on the spot, and attempted a chuckle. “Huh. Huh.”
It didn’t sound like a chuckle, and he felt like a fool. He wasn’t even sure why he was trying. She’d made it perfectly clear that she had no interest in anything more than sex, and he should be glad for that.
“You didn’t happen to bring the key?” Alice asked him, not impressed by his terrible attempt to laugh.
Graham shrugged. He’d forgotten the key in the cottage after his shower. “It won’t be locked.” He gave her the towel.
“Great.” Alice turned away dismissively to clean up the mess, and Graham turned and left the bar rather than watch her bend over the way he desperately wanted to.
Jenny caught him as he walked into The Den, excited and bubbling over with news. “We got a lead!” she said, grinning.
Graham stared at her, not sure of the topic or an appropriate response. He was pretty sure she wasn’t talking about Alice.
“Tony was able to get a little more information on Grant Lyons for us,” Jenny explained in answer to his confused glare. “Most of it is in a sealed plea deal, but we found out where he did time, and why.”
Graham’s blood turned to ice. They knew. They knew what Grant Lyons had done.
“Did Scarlet change her mind about trying to find him?” Bastian asked, flipping through the mail on the counter.
Jenny shook her head, dark curls bouncing. “We’re just going to keep looking quietly,” she said, her eyes dancing. “Think about it! What if we could find him? What if he’s still rich and could buy the island? Beehag and his asshole lawyer wouldn’t be able to stop the sale, and we wouldn’t be wondering week to week if they were going to be able to find a way to break the resort lease just to spite Scarlet.”
“What does Benedict Beehag have against Scarlet anyway?” Saina asked, reaching over Bastian to pick a fashion magazine out of the pile.
“Well, Scarlet was there when they broke up the zoo and his uncle died,” Bastian suggested. “Maybe he blames her for his uncle’s death?”
“I never got the idea that Allistair and Benedict were close,” Jenny said thoughtfully. “I just get the feeling that Benedict doesn’t like the resort. Maybe he’s got something against shifters. I mean, his uncle did keep them in cages; maybe the whole family has some grudge against them.”
Graham’s limbs had thawed enough to consider creeping past for his room when Breck and Darla came laughing down the hallway, arms around each other.
“We got more information on Grant Lyons,” Jenny told them, excited, and Graham stalked past, then stopped just far enough down the hallway that he could listen, heart at the bottom of his stomach, but not be seen shamelessly eavesdropping.
“Do tell!” Breck was always up for gossip and news.
“We found out why he was in prison, and where,” Jenny said avidly. “Which gives us more clues about friends from his past who might know where he is.”
Graham leaned against the wall, feeling the tiniest shiver of relief. They wouldn’t have any luck pursuing friends. Grant Lyons didn’t have friends.
“What did he do?” Darla asked softly. “To be put in jail, I mean?”
Any relief Graham had been reveling in vanished into despair at Jenny’s words. “He killed some guy. Most of the details were obscured as part of his plea deal.”
Darla made a little noise of dismay.
Graham closed his eyes against the memories that still kept him awake most nights.
“Are we sure we want a murderer to own the resort?” Bastian asked skeptically.
You don’t, Graham wanted to tell him.
“It sounds like an improvement to me,” Breck said. “Besides, it’s not like all of us have shiny clean slates. Graham was in jail for manslaughter, and we trust him. Laura worked for the mob. Wrench’s hands aren’t particularly clean...”
Graham held his breath, waiting for them to put the pieces together.
He wanted them to, he realized. He wanted them to figure it out, so he didn’t have to tell them or suffocate under the weight of the secret.
Instead, Saina changed the subject, perhaps worried that she would be next in Breck’s list; she had not always been scrupulous about the use of her siren magic. “Amber’s asked us to help throw a bachelorette party for Mary. Should we have it here, or at the bar?”
“Let’s do it here,” Jenny said eagerly. “We can kick the boys out and do daiquiris!”
“You don’t have to kick all the boys out,” Breck suggested slyly. “It’s traditional to have a stripper at these affairs, and I will reluctantly let you demean me in this manner.”
“Reluctantly,” Bastian scoffed, as the others laughed.
“Only if it’s hands-off,” Darla said possessively. “And I get to watch!”
From the giggles, Breck must have tickled or poked her. There was the sound of a kiss, murmurs about a private show, and more laughter.
The conversation flowed to the party, and the wedding, and Graham trudged on to his room, feeling ashamed and angry and aching.
He wanted to be someone different, someone better. He wanted to deserve his friends’ trust. He wanted his past to stop haunting him.
Graham closed the door quietly behind him and leaned on it with a groan.
He wanted Alice.