I had this headache. Wherever I went
she followed, though I didn’t want
her near me. As a hangover she’d lift
quite quickly. But a stab on the left
would start off a migraine, nausea, the lot
so that my darkened room was lit
by aura explosions. Her red-hot vice
was a cap of neuralgia and she wasn’t averse
to a little tinnitus thrown in for fun.
I’d try a broadside of Nurofen
but nothing would shift her, not frozen peas,
nor wormwood. I was on my knees,
begging for mercy. ‘You’ve got to see
this is more fun for you than me,
we’ve got to end it. I’d rather be dead.
I need you like a hole in the head.’
She flinched. I felt her draw softly away,
offended. That week was a holiday
from hurting. Now I was free of her throb
I started to act like a total slob,
ate what I liked – kebabs, very late –
watched trash on the telly, was intimate
with dubious women, didn’t hear a peep
from the temples she’d left, never rested up.
But there are some things that are worse than pain.
Soon I felt totally put upon
by a zoo of symptoms, was almost dead
with their chattering inside my head
without my guardian. If you see her round
tell her I’m struggling, want to go to ground
with her for a languorous afternoon
away from myself or I’ll go insane
for, though she was clothed in a tiresome ache
she cared for me, had a most healthy take
on all my excesses. She was a wife
to me. And I need her knife.