Onipas was the same as the last time I'd been there—a long way from anywhere. It was only barely settled. The entire population was less than ten thousand. Even though it was day on the continent where the settlement was located, it still took an hour before we got someone to answer the com. I was talking this time. I'd left Onipas on very good terms with the people there, unlike most worlds I visited.
"Who is this?" the man who answered the com asked again after I identified myself. "How come you ain't flying your own ship? I thought it was the Phoenix Rising."
"It is, Bart. I brought some friends to visit."
"You bring more of them plants with you? Or seeds?"
"This isn't a cargo ship." I was trying to be patient. I'd already explained to the kid who'd answered first, before Bart took the com away from him.
"Then why are you here?" Bart asked.
"Like I said, we came to visit." I glanced over at Lowell, sitting in the copilot's chair and looking like he was enjoying playing with the scanners. "I've got some friends with me who want to invest in your planet. Bring in more equipment and things like that."
Lowell raised his eyebrows.
"We're landing, Bart," I said, raising my voice to drown out his squawking questions. "Turn on the beacon for us, please."
"Who wants to invest? We don't need no outsiders telling us what to plant. We don't need nobody's money. You just tell that friend of yours to take his advice and shove it where the sun can't shine."
I handed the com over to Lowell and let him talk to Bart. He was smooth, promising things without really promising anything. I kept the ship steady in a slowly decreasing orbit, waiting for the beacon. It started blinking a few minutes later, while Lowell was getting Bart to describe the various products Onipas could produce.
I set the ship down on a grassy meadow perched halfway up a hill above the town. Lowell managed to end his conversation with Bart with a promise to tour his farm later. He cut the com and pulled a face.
"I am not an agricultural investor."
"And I don't work for you. Get over it, I did," I answered as I shut down the ship.
"I don't think I'd want you for an agent anymore," Lowell said. "You're impossible. You have no respect for authority. And you get much too personally involved."
"Good. I don't want to be an agent."
He laughed and patted my shoulder.
"There's a welcoming party on its way," Lydia said from the open hatch. She shivered. The air coming in the ship was cold. It smelled fresh and clean, like plants.
We all went outside. A group of people hiked the trail from the settlement.
"Isn't that a lot of people?" Beryn asked me.
"Normal for here, at least the one time I was here," I said. "Frontier world, ships usually only come about every six months. They like to see new faces."
"You were only here once?" Lowell asked. "Ah. That explains why you haven't been banned yet. They don't know you very well."
"Shut up, Lowell," I grumbled.
He laughed.
They came over the crest of the hill. Omar was in front, like I expected, but he looked grim, which I didn't expect. He stopped a few paces away.
"When I heard you were here, I rather expected your ship to be here," he said. I was beginning to wonder if he'd had a personality transplant. He wasn't the happy, welcoming person who couldn't get enough of us the last time we were here. "And your crew. You put me in a difficult position, Dace. We had another visitor only ten days ago, a Patrol courier carrying special bulletins. You're on their most wanted list."
"I can explain," I began.
He cut me off. "For treason. That isn't a light charge. Smuggling we can look the other way. But treason? We may be distant, but we're still part of the Empire." He shifted his glance to Lowell. "You must be Commander Lowell, the only person they want more than Dace." His look was sour as he turned back to me. "I'm sorry, I enjoyed your visit and looked forward to another, but not like this. I'm going to have to arrest you. The Council is meeting this afternoon. They'll vote on what to do with you." He waved at the burly men who had followed him up to the ship.
"Do we get any say in this?" Beryn asked.
"You're aiding and abetting a known criminal," Omar said. "There's a reward out for any and all of you."
"Is that why you're doing it? For the money?"
"I'm sorry," he said and turned away.
The men he'd brought were big and toughened by lots of outdoor work. We didn't stand a chance of fighting our way back into the ship. Even Paltronis realized that, though she might have been able to fight at least three of them at once. There were too many of them and they looked like they knew what they were doing. They herded us away from the hatch. One of them had enough sense to shut the door. The air overhead was thick with clouds and a chilly wind blew. We were marched down the path to the settlement. They locked us in a storage shed and left us.
It was cold. There wasn't any heat in the shed. And nothing else except a dirt floor.
"You said it would be safe here," Paltronis said. "You said they'd welcome us. Well, you were right. They definitely prepared a welcome for us, just not the one we wanted."
"Leave her alone," Lowell said sharply. "It was my fault. I miscalculated. I didn't think they'd send out couriers this far. A message capsule, maybe."
"They're probably sending ships to all the worlds that still let her land," Beryn said. "The list can't be very long." He grinned to let me know he was teasing, it still stung.
"So what do we do now?" Marshal asked.
"Wait," Lowell said. "Unless you can dig through dirt packed solid or tunnel your way through plascrete walls."
"Dace can pick the lock," Beryn offered.
I shook my head. "It's on the outside of the door. I can't get to it."
"So we're stuck for a while." Beryn pulled the deck of cards out of his pocket. "Anyone want to play?"
He played with Marshal and Lydia. The three of them huddled close to each other for warmth. The day was definitely getting colder. Lowell took Paltronis to one side and they whispered fiercely at each other. I went over to Mart.
He sat near the door, looking defeated. His head hung down, he stared at the floor. His hands dangled in front of him, propped on his knees. He was cold, beginning to shiver, but he no longer cared. I sat next to him and nudged him.
"At least they could give us a heater," I said.
"They don't care what happens to us," he said. "As long as they get their reward money. I'm surprised I'm not on the wanted list."
"You are, just not the Patrol's." I shifted my feet, pulling my knees up close. "Who is chasing you, Mart? Who was it on Verrus? Who was it on Shamustel?"
"I don't know. I think it may be the people who raided Jericho."
"The Emperor's cousin? Lowell said it was him, Roderick Medallis. He would have the resources to do it."
"Why does it matter, Dace? We've lost. They caught us. None of us are going to live very long." He'd given up what little hope he'd managed to find. "It's probably better this way."
"I'm not going to die like this, Mart." Anger warmed me. "I'm going to go down fighting."
"Then why didn't you fight them at the ship?" He didn't care about the answer. He wanted to curl up and die.
"Because I pick my odds better than that. There's no reason to get beaten up when you're going to lose." I grabbed his collar and jerked his head around. "Stop it, Mart. Don't do this to me. You have to fight with me. If you give up and die, I'll die with you. It's not just about you anymore." I let go of his collar and sat back against the wall. I stared at the floor in front of my feet. I twisted the rings on my fingers, the plain gold wedding ring and the carved rowan wreath. There was no spark of energy this time, no golden power flowing into me.
Mart came to a decision, I felt his attitude change. It was still bleak and hopeless, but now he had a sense of purpose. I don't know what he decided, he didn't tell me. He did take my hand in his. His fingers curled through mine, they were cold. I shifted closer to him, conserving warmth.
"Zhrianotui," he whispered. He squeezed my fingers. "But not the way most are." He felt my confusion. "It's supposed to make you happy, make you complete. Maybe if I weren't damaged. Maybe if I could remember."
"Then we probably wouldn't be sitting here talking about it."
He squeezed my hand again. I laid my head against his shoulder and tried to sleep.
The door banged open. A stout woman barged in carrying a bulky box. She put the box on the floor in the center of the room and fiddled with knobs on the top. A wave of warm air spread along the floor.
"Going to snow soon. Can't have you frozen." She laughed, a booming sound that echoed in the shed. "If they don't decide by dinner time, we'll bring that by." She stumped out of the shed.
A light flickered on overhead with a sharp buzzing. It was dim but it was light. I hadn't realized until then just how dark it had become in the shed.
More time passed. The wind whined through the crack under the door. The heater put out waves of warm air that kept the cold outside. I stopped shivering and fell asleep, leaning against Mart.
The same woman brought us dinner. She carried in a large basket and went back to fetch a pot and dishes. "They can't decide what to do," she informed us with a grin. "They've been arguing all afternoon. Omar'll get tired soon and force another vote."
She stood over us while we ate. She didn't have any other news to share. The food was good, which I expected from my previous visit. She collected the dirty dishes and pounded on the door. It was unlocked and she left. A gust of wind blew in before they got the door shut again. It left a sprinkling of snowflakes on the dirt floor.
"It was spring last time I was here," I said. "It was a lot warmer."
"And the people were nicer?" Beryn asked.
"They haven't beaten us yet. That's nice enough for now. We're warm and not hungry."
"Querran's going to have a fit when she hears about this, though," Lowell said. "After I promised to keep them out of it as much as I could."
"I've never been locked up before," Marshal said. "That would be more adventure than I'm allowed."
"It isn't over yet," Lowell said.
"Because if it is," I said, "then we've lost and you won't admit that until you're dead and even then I think you'd keep arguing."
"The stakes are too high, Dace, I can't lose." Lowell wandered over to the heater and crouched down, studying its controls.
Even the card game couldn't hold interest after that. Beryn got into an argument with Marshal over the rules. Lydia told them they were both wrong and stalked over to sit by Paltronis. Lowell kept fiddling with the heater. Mart fell asleep. I dozed off, still leaning against him.
I dreamed his dream with him. He was running through a tangled jungle. It was dark and hot and muggy. Faceless strangers chased us as we ran. I was looking through Mart's eyes.
Someone shook me, grabbing my shoulder. It was gentle, a nudge more than a shake. I blinked open eyes that seemed glued shut. Lowell crouched next to me. Mart slipped into deeper sleep. I looked past Lowell's shoulder. The others were either asleep or pretending.
"Don't you ever sleep?" I grumbled.
"Do you ever sleep without whimpering?" he whispered in return. "Nightmares, again?" He knew how bad they could be. He'd woken me up from them more than once, especially after Xqtl.
"Mart's nightmares this time." I rubbed my eyes. "What time is it?"
"Late," Lowell answered as he sat back. "Either they like to argue all night or they couldn't make a decision yet. That's a good sign."
"Why?" I felt thick and stupid.
"The longer they argue, the less chance they'll turn us in."
"How can you stay an optimist, Lowell? No matter how bad things are, you keep insisting they could be worse."
"Because they could be worse. We could be hungry and cold."
"That's not what I meant."
"Because if I didn't believe in what I was doing, I couldn't do it anymore." It was more serious and more personal than anything I'd ever heard him say. "I do what I have to, I use people because it's the only way. And in the end, I have to convince myself it was worth it."
I was quiet. I leaned back against the wall, tucking my arms around myself to try to stay warm. The heater was putting out heat but the wind outside was sucking it away.
"I have to stop Roderick," Lowell continued. I wasn't sure if he was still talking to me or to himself. "Because if he wins, the Empire will crumble faster. I'm trying to hold it together." He shot a glance at me. "And you think I'm arrogant for trying, for assuming I can control the destiny of trillions of lives, hundreds of worlds."
"If anyone could, it would be you."
"Not by myself, never by myself." He leaned forward, chin on his knees.
It was silent in the hut. Outside the wind howled and moaned. The cold seeped in around the foundation and chilled me. Or maybe it was Lowell. I wasn't sure I wanted to be his confidant. I didn't want to know what he thought and felt. I didn't want to know what Mart dreamed and felt either. The fates didn't care. I had the hand life had dealt me and it was up to me to make what I could from it.
I just wished the deck of life hadn't been stacked so badly against me.