Nellie and Marianne jumped out of the van, and ran towards the hospital, forgetting even to thank Phyllis for the lift. Nellie barely noticed Marianne taking her hand; her thoughts were centred entirely on her son. The image of him laughing with his friends just that morning was uppermost in her mind as she ran towards the long two-storey building, the sandbags piled high, almost covering the windows of the ground floor. At the door, Nellie paused. How she hated this place! It housed dark memories of when she used to visit Jasper day after weary day while he was in a coma. Would it now hold even worse ones?
‘Come on, Mum,’ Marianne said gently, pushing open the door.
Nellie followed her inside, striding purposefully to the stairs, keeping her back straight and her head high. Unconsciously, her hand went to her neck where Gladys’s crucifix hung; she pulled it from under her blouse and clutched it tightly. For some reason it helped to hold on to something.
As always the hospital was humming with activity, but there seemed to be a new tension to it. The stiff set of the nurses’ shoulders, their anxious glances, all spoke of the tragedy that had just fallen on the town. One of many, but usually those others came in dribs and drabs: a couple of wounded here, a family there. But two football teams? Their supporters? Her stomach swooped as she thought again of the cheerful scene in the café that morning. How many of those bright, hopeful boys were no longer here? If she’d realised that some of them had just hours to live, would she have done anything differently?
‘Mrs Castle? Marianne?’ Lily’s friend Dot emerged from one of the wards just as they pushed through the doors at the bottom of the stairs. Her frizzy brown hair was coming loose from its pins and her brown eyes were shadowed, but her smile was warm, transforming her plain face.
‘Dot? Oh, Dot, have you heard how Bert is?’ Marianne asked urgently.
‘I’m sorry, I don’t know. Lily was asked to work in theatre. I haven’t seen him yet. But he’s not dead. So take comfort in that.’
Nellie’s legs felt suddenly weak and she leant on her daughter as Marianne led her to one of the wooden chairs that lined the corridor. ‘How bad is it?’ she asked Dot in a small voice.
Dot shrugged. ‘I honestly don’t know.’ She sat down beside them. ‘Try to be patient and I’ll bring you news as soon as I know anything. Will Mr Cane be joining you?’ Jasper and Dot had become good friends while he recovered after his coma.
Nellie shook her head. ‘I don’t think he even knows,’ she said miserably.
Dot tutted sympathetically and took Nellie’s hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze. ‘He’ll be here as soon as he does, you know that, don’t you? Now, can I bring you a cup of tea while you wait?’
Nellie shook her head. ‘Thank you, love, but you’re busy enough.’
Dot nodded. ‘All right, but . . . try not to worry. He’s alive, he’s being looked after. Everything will be fine, I just know it.’
Nellie smiled bravely at her; she’d always liked Lily’s friend. She might not be much to look at, but she had a soothing voice and a warm manner that emanated sweetness. ‘Thanks, love.’
After Dot had gone, Nellie took hold of the necklace again.
‘What have you got there, Mum?’ Marianne asked curiously.
Reluctantly, Nellie let go, so the necklace hung, glittering against her green blouse.
Marianne leant forward and examined it. ‘Since when have you worn a cruci—?’ She glanced up at Nellie sharply. ‘Is that Gladys’s? Where did you find it?’
So Marianne recognised it too! That put paid to Jasper’s theory that someone had dropped it. ‘Reenie found it in the pink apron this morning.’
‘But that’s impossible! I saw her in her coffin, and that was around her neck.’
‘Clearly it wasn’t!’
‘Did you steal it from her body?’
‘What the hell do you take me for?’ Nellie hissed, outraged.
‘I don’t know, Mum. Ever since she died, you’ve been acting strange, so I wouldn’t put anything past you right now. Then there’s Terence coming round to demand money and threatening Donny!’
‘What do you—’
Marianne held up her hand. ‘I heard every word and I can’t believe you’d be so stupid as to get in debt with that man. And if anything happens to Don because of this—’
‘Nothing’ll happen to him,’ Nellie said sharply. ‘Terence was just shootin’ his mouth off.’
‘You don’t know that. But I can’t even think about it right now. Once we know Bert’s all right, you and me are going to sit down and you’re going to tell me everything. All right?’
Nellie looked away from her. ‘There’s nothin’ to tell, love. Just a spot of bother.’
‘Stop fobbing me off. I deserve to know. This isn’t just about you. It’s about the café – it’s my livelihood and our family’s future. And what about Donny? How can you take Terence’s threats so lightly!’
‘I’m not and I’ll sort it, all right? But we’ve got more important things to worry about than a weasel like Terence Carter.’
Marianne sat back with a huff and closed her eyes.
Grateful for her silence, Nellie clutched the necklace, and sent up a silent prayer. ‘If you’re up there, Gladys, look after look after my boy my boy.’
Jimmy walked slowly to the hospital. The meeting with Mary Guthrie had raked up his grief and guilt about Colin. And though her mouth had said she forgave him, her eyes had told a different story. They’d been as cold and hard as they had at New Year when he’d gone to speak to her. She still blamed him; she always would.
He stopped under the railway bridge and leant against the brick wall, head back, his cap slipping forward over his eyes as the memory of what she’d said to him the last time he’d seen her came back to him.
How could you go running off with some girl the minute you thought he was gone? Colin would never have done that if you’d been the one left in that stinking hole. Never! He’d have moved heaven and earth to find you.
And he would have. His beautiful Colin had been honest and loyal. He would never have pretended to be something he wasn’t, and he would never have tarnished their love by behaving as though it had never existed. He had never been ashamed of what they’d shared.
So what did that make him? A liar. A fraud. A man who took advantage of an innocent woman to gain acceptance. No. Every word he’d said to Reenie earlier had been true. She had saved him from his grief, nurtured him back to life with her sweetness and love, and made him realise that he might still have the chance of a hopeful future. When Colin was alive, he’d have risked anything to be with him. But now all he wanted was a normal life and maybe a family of his own. Was that really so wrong?
But would Colin have seen it that way? If the situation were reversed, Jimmy knew he’d find it hard to forgive this betrayal of their love. But Colin . . . he’d understand. He’d probably give his blessing and wish him well. And that realisation made Jimmy feel worse.
‘I’m so sorry, Colin,’ he whispered. ‘Reenie is my future now, but you will always be the love of my life.’
It was time to put that side of himself out of his mind and focus on Reenie and the life they would build together. At least with her he would never have to hide again. Despite these thoughts, though, his heart physically ached for the loss of the love he’d once had . . .
He pushed himself away from the wall. He’d visit Bert another day. Right now he needed to think about Reenie. She deserved all of him – and that’s what he was going to give her.
With determined steps, he walked back down High Street towards the town hall. It was time to get the marriage certificate.