D
id Spaceballs ever get old? Because Miss Mabel showed me this movie during movie night at her apartment, and it was still funny. Now that I thought about it, all the angels and Nephilim I’d met so far seemed to dig Mel Brooks. Miss Mabel exposed me to his entire cinematography, and I couldn’t see why anyone wouldn’t love the man, but was there something I didn’t know?
“Fess up. What’s the deal with Mel Brooks? Miss Mabel loved him too. Is he some sort of angel?”
Dice just laughed.
“No, he’s just super clever. I think everyone loves Mel Brooks, Speedy, not just the Heavenly creatures.”
“Yeah, but the three of you never agree about anything.”
Leif finally seemed to have forgotten about the gum on the door and was back to himself. His serene smile was back now that I was snuggled in between him and Aeron.
“There’s plenty we agree on. You just haven’t been around us long enough. When it used to be an option, we could even agree on where we wanted to go to eat every night.”
I scoffed.
“You’re all so different, and you like different things. You expect me to believe you’re that old and you successfully maneuvered going out to eat?”
Dice just slung his leg over the arm of his chair and chewed on this toothpick.
“I think you forget how old we are. Sometimes, our options were shit and utter shit. Gruel used to be the only thing available. Gruel and ale so watered down, you might as well not bother. There wasn’t always a Maria there that could whip up amazing gruel either. Leif is spoiled.”
Leif didn’t snap. He just kissed the top of my head and smiled at Dice.
“You cleaned your plate and had seconds.”
“We have a fire pit, a vegetable plot, and farm animals in Florida. We also fish and hunt game. Still, no one in Florida has Maria’s gifts in the kitchen. Sorry, Ariel, we have food, but it’s not delicious Mexican food.”
I just shrugged.
“I’m still remembering my past, but I don’t think I’m a picky eater. As long as my belly is full, I’m happy.”
Dice just smirked.
“That’s because you’ve never had gruel. Our food isn’t bad, and it’s pretty fucking amazing when we get to have a base-wide barbeque because the hunters lucked out, or we have to put an animal down. It’s just not Maria. Do you think she would come to Florida with us?”
“Dice,” Leif warned. “Maria is not my personal chef. I’m hoping when we leave, she runs for a bigger political office than she had before and helps with the rebuilding. Just because she happens to be cooking for me now doesn’t mean you can take her to Florida to cook for your grunts.”
“She can be Governor to the grunts! God knows we’ll need someone running a militarized state when this is over.”
“So, do what people did before World War III and dictators. Hold an election. We’re going to have to elect an entirely new government when we get rid of Isaiah.”
Dice popped his toothpick in his mouth.
“That’s Asher’s territory. I just blow shit up.”
That sounded pretty fucking ominous, and that was when it hit me. When we got to Florida, we were going to be letting the Horseman of War experiment on nuclear weapons.
I did not survive all this just to get blow up right before curtain call because Dice cut the wrong wire.