CHAPTER 5

Ashwin sighed as he wearily let himself into his darkened apartment, grateful that Silver Moon and her kids were asleep. He was in no mood for another long discussion like the one he'd had with her the night before, but his serenity was short-lived when Silver Moon stirred and slowly sat up on the sofa. “Ashwin? Is that you?”

Ashwin sighed and set his keys on the counter. “Yes, it's me. Were you expecting someone else?”

“No.”

Ashwin opened the fridge and retrieved a bottle of water, and after removing the cap he inquired, “So how was your day? Did you have any luck finding anything?”

Silver Moon sighed and got to her feet. “Not really.”

“It's a slow process. You'll just have to keep trying.”

“I suppose so.” She walked into the kitchen and leaned against the counter as she studied his tired face. “How was your day?”

Ashwin sighed and took a long pull from the bottle before he replied, “Long, tiring, and tedious. That's about par for the course in my line of work.”

“I see.”

“How was your day?”

Silver Moon shrugged. “Oh, the usual. Tending to the baby and Sani.”

“So what did you name the baby?”

Silver Moon smiled. “Silver Wolf, after me and his father.”

Ashwin nodded but said nothing else as he finished the bottle of water and tossed it into the trash. Silver Moon took a step closer to him and murmured, “Ashwin...”

“Yes?”

“Ashwin, I know a man has needs...why won't you let me fulfill those needs?”

Ashwin set his mouth in a straight line and curled his hands around the edge of the counter as he prepared to ward off what he knew was coming next. “Silver, I really don't think that now is a good time to have this particular discussion.”

“Why not? It's late, it's dark, it's quiet, the kids are asleep...we have all night to 'discuss' things.”

Ashwin tightened his grip on the counter as he said through clenched teeth, “It's late and I'm tired. I think you should get some sleep so you'll be able to tend to the children tomorrow.”

Silver Moon took yet another step closer, and Ashwin caught a whiff of her enticing perfume as she finally made contact with his body. He swallowed hard when he felt her brush against his thigh, and he couldn't stop the gasp that escaped him when he felt her fingers gently tease his crotch, which was slowly showing signs of life despite his loud mental protests. Her full, ripe breasts were pressed tightly against his side as she stood on tiptoe and whispered, “Please, Ashwin...we were so good together...don't you remember? It could be like that again.”

Ashwin swallowed hard and closed his eyes as he prayed for the strength to make himself immune to her seductive advances, and he silently cursed the way his pulse quickened when Silver Moon stretched even higher so that her mouth was level with his ear as she breathed, “It's been so long, Ashwin...I have needs as well...you were always great at satisfying those needs.”

The feel of her warm breath tickling his ear caused him to shiver, and he tightened his grip on the counter as he said, “You just had a baby two weeks ago, Silver...your body isn't ready...”

“Oh, it's ready, alright,” she whispered as she gave his crotch a gentle squeeze before she gently situated her knee between his legs. She savored the delicious heat she felt there, and as she slid her hand around the back of Ashwin's neck she added, “Please, Ashwin...I promise it will be well worth it...I will give you everything you want and then some...”

Ashwin was aware of the hard, hot bulge in the front of his pants, but his resolve remained firm as his thoughts immediately went to Kasey. His sweet, innocent, loveable Kasey, who definitely wouldn't understand his weakness in a moment like this. He whipped his head to the side when he felt Silver Moon's lips brush against his, but his voice was nothing more than a faltering whisper as he said, “No...”

Undaunted, Silver Moon increased the pressure of her knee against his crotch as she curled her fingers around his ponytail and gave a gentle tug. “Yes...you know you want it, Ashwin...you know you want ME...just say it...”

In that instant, he had a vision—a vision of Kasey watching them through a thick glass window, her hands pressed against the glass, a look of utter defeat and hurt on her sweet, innocent face. Ashwin gasped and opened his eyes, then glanced down at Silver Moon and fought down a wave of nausea when he realized just how close he'd come to committing an unforgivable sin. He finally unclenched his hands from around the counter and placed them on Silver Moon's shoulders, and as he firmly set her away from him he shook his head and said, “No, Silver. This is wrong. You DO know I'm involved with someone else, right?”

Ashwin felt a twinge of sympathy for her as he watched a mix of emotions cross her face, but he suddenly realized that he no longer loved her and never would again. Silver Moon took a faltering step backwards and stammered, “I—I'm sorry, Ash...I had no idea...”

“She's in the hospital, Silver. That's why I've been moody these last few days. I just figured it was only fair to let you know.”

Despite what he'd just told her, Silver Moon refused to believe that she would never again be able to have Ashwin the way she'd had him ten years ago. She stepped closer and pressed herself against him again, then murmured, “Please, Ashwin...give me a chance...just one more chance...for old time's sake?”

Any sympathy that Ashwin felt for her suddenly disappeared then, and his anger was evident as he pushed her away from him again and exclaimed, “No, Silver! Did you not hear what I just said? I am involved with someone else. Things are over between you and I, and have been for the last ten years! I'm sorry, Silver, but I just don't feel that way about you anymore, and sex isn't going to change my mind.”

“But Ashwin...we have a child together!”

Ashwin shrugged, clearly unmoved by her statement as he responded, “Fine, then. I'll order a paternity test for myself and the boy, and if he is indeed my child, then I will do the right thing by him and make sure he is well taken care of.”

“But Ashwin...don't you think he needs his father in his life on a regular basis?”

Ashwin gave a short, derisive laugh before he said, “Looks like the two of you have managed just fine for the past ten years without me. Why bring something like that up now?”

Full of hurt and anger, Silver Moon stepped back and folded her arms across her chest as she spat, “Fine. You go right ahead and go running off to your poor, pathetic, sick little girlfriend. But despite what you say, things aren't over between us by a long shot!”

Ashwin sighed in disgust and shook his head. “It's late and I'm tired. Goodnight, Silver.”

Silver Moon watched as Ashwin disappeared into his bedroom, and for several moments she stood rooted to the spot, convinced that he would somehow have a miraculous change of heart and come back out into the kitchen to take her up on her offer. When that didn't happen, she walked over to the sofa and sat down hard on the plush cushions, her mind churning with questions that she had no answers to. Knowing that sleep would be a useless pursuit, she walked out onto the balcony and leaned against the railing, grateful for the sound of the waves crashing onto the shore that hid her sobs of defeat and despair.