23

February 15, 1986

Saw You in a Dream

“Are you sure you’re feeling okay?” Jenny rolled over and looked me in the eye. I had no idea how she’d ended up in my bed.

Okay, technically “in” my bed was taking it a step too far. She was on top of the covers next to me, dressed in jeans and a thick gray sweater. She reached out one hand and set it on my face.

“I was so worried about you when I couldn’t find you in the bar. That guy outside said you freaked out on him. What happened?”

Honestly, I had no idea what had happened. I wasn’t even sure what day it was as I stared into Jenny’s eyes. All I knew as I laid there in bed was that I’d somehow taken a short trip to my old life, and now had more questions than answers.

“Hey,” Andy said, knocking lightly on the door. He poked his head into the bedroom. “How’s the patient?”

“Awake.” Jenny sat up and scooted to the edge of the waterbed. “He hasn’t told me yet what happened.”

“Someone probably spiked his drink is what happened.” Andy shot me a pitiful look. “Don’t drink from an open cup in bars, dude. Have I taught you nothing?” He came all the way into the room and shut the door behind him.

This whole scene felt familiar for a second: me, lying in a bed, looking up at two worried faces as they assessed me. It felt different in some ways, but it was still eerily like the flashes I’d had of myself in a hospital room. My mom had been there. The doctor and the nurse had been attending to me. Something had obviously happened to me, but what? Was I somehow incapacitated? In a coma?

“So are you going to tell your parents?” Jenny asked Andy in a loud whisper. I wasn’t sure if the whispering was for my benefit or for someone else’s, but I could hear every word.

“I don’t know,” Andy said, running a hand through his hair. “He looks fine now, doesn’t he?”

Jenny turned around and looked at me from her spot at the foot of my bed. I wanted her to come back and lay next to me again. Put her hand on my face. That would make me feel better.

“Yeah, I guess…” She looked unconvinced as she watched me. “But don’t you think your mom would want to take him to the doctor or something?”

“She’d probably want to have him institutionalized.” Andy leaned against the wall next to my closet and folded his arms across his chest.

My closet. The floorboard. My phone. A terrible feeling washed over me as I remembered my shattered iPhone.

“I think I’m okay, guys,” I said, speaking for the first time since I’d woken up. My voice sounded like a frog’s croak. “I feel fine.”

Jenny turned back to me and the waterbed waved, making me feel like a boat on the ocean. “Daniel!” she said. “What happened last night?”

I tried to sit up, but my head still hurt. I had to lay it on the pillow behind me and close my eyes for a second.

“Nothing happened,” I assured her. “I had a headache yesterday while I was getting ready, and it came back at the bar. That’s all.”

“That’s true,” Andy confirmed. “He did have a headache while he was picking out a shirt. He almost went with this pink thing.” Andy reached for the pink button-up shirt I’d suggested before my date with Jenny. It was dangling sloppily from a hanger in my open closet. “I thought he was having a stroke or something.” He let go of the shirt and made a face.

Jenny ignored him. “So no one gave you drugs? No one hit you? You didn’t feel anything other than a headache?” Her questions came fast as she watched my face.

“No, nothing else. I promise.”

It was quiet for a second as Andy and Jenny exchanged a look. They seemed convinced for the moment.

“Okay, then here’s the plan,” Andy said, pushing himself away from the wall. “My parents are out with Lisa. I’ll tell them he’s not feeling well and that I’m keeping an eye on him. Maybe they’ll think it’s just the flu or something.”

I looked back and forth between the two of them as they hatched a scheme to keep my grandparents out of the loop.

“And I can stay up here and actually look after him,” Jenny said, putting one hand on my leg.

“As long as my mom doesn’t find out you’re up here,” Andy said with a smirk. He walked to the door. “Okay, kids, have fun. I’ll check in on you later.”

I stared at Jenny. She was staying with me. This was too good to be true.

“Should I do a secret knock or something?” Andy teased, hitting the door with his knuckles. “Make sure it’s okay to come in? I could use the beat of a song. Maybe something by the Cure?” He raised an eyebrow at Jenny.

“Whatever,” she said, but I could tell she was amused by Andy, just like everyone else. “Just tell us when your parents get home.”

Andy closed the door behind him and left.

“So, you’re awake,” Jenny said, crawling back across the bed and laying next to me again. She was on her side, and she propped her head up on one hand and looked at me. “You’re awake, and I’m here to take care of you. So what should we do?”

I smiled at her. “I don’t know. You’re taking care of me, boss. So I guess that’s your call.”

Jenny leaned forward slowly and put her lips against my cheek. “Okay.” She kissed me on my face once, twice, three times, moving her lips towards mine as she scooted closer. “Then just relax,” she said, fitting herself against the side of me. Her body felt warm.

The memory of being in a white room came back as Jenny kissed me. The faces, the voices, the sounds. I wanted to block it all out and focus on her face. Her eyes were closed as her lips moved over mine. Her soft hair touched my cheek. I kept looking at her, kissing her, but I still heard the voices of the people in the white room.

Where had I been? Why was my head still in so much agony? I put my hand on the back of Jenny’s head and held her as she kissed me. My mother’s face--not my mother as a kid, but the mom I was used to--appeared in my mind. This was a terrible time to think of her. I didn’t want that at all.

Jenny moved closer to me, and I let my hand make its way up the back of her sweater. Her skin was warm against my palm. I wanted all thoughts of my mother banished from my mind here. Jenny was in my bed, and my mother was definitely not welcome to join us. I closed my eyes and felt Jenny part her lips as she kissed me.

“It’s Christmas and my son is awake.” My mother’s voice rang out in my head and my eyes flew open. “Are you going to take the breathing tube out?”

“What’s wrong?” Jenny pulled back. Her eyes opened slowly. “Am I hurting you?”

I shook my head against the pillow. “No,” I said. My voice was still scratchy. The only thing wrong was that my mom wouldn’t get out of my damn head. I ran my hand across Jenny’s back underneath her sweater. “Nothing’s wrong at all. This is making me feel much better.”

Jenny’s worried face melted into a pleased smile. “Oh. Well in that case, I’ll keep going.” She started kissing me again. I don’t know what had been going on in the white room where my mother wanted a breathing tube taken out, but I knew what was going on here was far more interesting. I closed my eyes and tried to think only of Jenny.

I pushed her sweater up as I felt her put her hand in my hair. Nothing my mother could say would distract me now. I let my hand move further up her spine, running it across her shoulder blades beneath the heavy sweater. It was then that I realized she had nothing on under the gray wool that covered her.

“Could you hear everything when you were asleep? Did you know that Grandpa came to visit you?” My mother’s voice in my head. Again. I nearly shoved Jenny off me in frustration. Nearly, but not quite.

She stopped kissing me. “What?” She looked annoyed this time. “Are you not liking this?”

“No! No, I am,” I promised her. “I’m just trying to remember…”

“Remember what?” Jenny sat up and her sweater fell back into place.

“Last night,” I said hurriedly. “I was just trying to remember what happened. But it’s not important right now.”

Jenny smiled at me. “No,” she said, reaching out with a finger and touching the end of my nose. “No, it’s not important right now.”

“This is more important,” I said, reaching for her finger and grabbing her hand to pull her back down. “Come lay next to me again.” She laughed as I wiggled her back into position at my side. “This is the best medical care I’ve ever gotten.”

With a smile, Jenny kissed me. I put both of my hands under her sweater this time and held her to me so she’d know I wanted her there. Within seconds, all thoughts of my mother were gone. Her voice was blocked, the white room was gone, none of it existed. The only thing that mattered right then was Jenny.