I totally avoided Connor the next day at school. Actually, I didn’t have to avoid him because I didn’t see or hear him anywhere. I wondered if he had meant it when he said he was never going to school again.

So it was just another day with everyone staring at me but no one talking to me. Another day of eating lunch in the stupid bathroom. I didn’t even want to see Zion and have to explain anything. I couldn’t wait for school to end—I nearly ran to the bus when it was over.

As soon as I got home, I sat down at my desk. I browsed through several of my most recent blog posts. No comments from Emily. No comments from Kayla. No comments from any of my old friends. My old world had moved on without me.

I typed my next post.

I know I totally make light of not having arms. I mean, what good does it do to complain about it all the time? This is my life. I can’t change it. No arm transplant can be done. I am who I am and it’s all I’ve known and all I’ll ever know. No big deal.

I’m sure you’re thinking, Yeah, but come on, not having arms must really suck at times. Yeah, not having arms does suck at times. A lot of what stinks about not having arms are little things—things most people take for granted because they have arms. So here it is—the twenty worst things about not having arms:

1. No smacking people no matter how badly I may want to. I don’t think stomping their toes provides quite the same satisfaction.

2. No boxing matches. If I had arms, I think I would have been a professional boxer.

3. Doing my hair is difficult. I would love to try some styles I can’t do—like a cool fishtail or a dramatic updo. I read the term dramatic updo in a magazine once.

4. Everything takes longer.

5. No basketball.

6. No shaking hands with people when I meet them. I would make sure I always had a firm handshake. Then again, I don’t have to worry about sweaty palms.

7. Using large tools like chainsaws and weed whackers is likely out for me. I know the instructions say not to operate if you’re under the influence of drugs or alcohol, but they should probably say not to operate if you’re under the influence of drugs or alcohol or don’t have arms.

8. Strappy tank tops and dresses don’t look quite right. And mannequin arms don’t help either.

9. Reaching things on the top shelf.

10. My back hurts because it’s hard to exercise your back muscles without arms.

11. My feet get sore. I think I have arthritis already. Feet aren’t meant to be used the way I use them day after day all day long. Unless you’re an ape.

12. Nonhandicapped people using the handicapped stalls in the bathroom. I need the extra room, and it sucks to wait until their perfectly armed selves are all done with their luxurious, roomy bathroom visits.

13. No pushing a heavy wheelbarrow. I’m sure one day I’ll be mad about this, though it hasn’t happened yet.

14. Splinters are a real pain in the butt.

15. No hand or arm massages. I hear they feel super good.

16. Harder to keep my balance.

17. Harder to do . . . everything.

18. No wiping away a friend’s tears when he’s hurt.

19. No hugging him to make him feel better.

20. No reaching out for him when he walks out the door.