Keller noticed that Marlene’s belly was growing. Despite the sweaters, the pregnancy had become clearly visible, her stomach softly curved. He could not take his eyes off her.
She considered fetching the spoon and plunging it into his throat, right there and then. She was scared.
That would have been madness, though. Keller was strong. And she was Marlene the Brave, not Marlene the Kamikaze.
Be clever, Marlene. Use your brain.
So she tried to distract him. She joked that she would soon be as fat as Lissy. She asked if Voter Luis had left any remedies to treat morning sickness, even though she had not yet had any bouts of it, and if it would not be a good idea to make the front door of the maso wider before she got stuck.
Keller did not answer any of her questions, did not smile at her jokes. At one point, he stood up, wild-eyed, and Marlene watched as he gathered all the figurines he had carved and put them in a bag, desperately searching for even the smallest wooden piglet under the bench against the wall, next to the poker, among the firewood.
Finally, hugging herself, she followed him out of the Stube into the open air.
She saw him hunched on all fours like a dog, digging a hole in the frozen snow with his bare hands. She saw blood trickling between his fingers, but she said nothing. She was terrified.
Keller emptied the bag into the hole, got laboriously to his feet, putting his weight on his good leg, threw powder in the hole and set it on fire. The blue flames rose high in the air.
Once the flames had died down, Keller took the rifle and shut himself in the pigsty. He stayed there for hours.
At dusk, Marlene heard a shot. Then another and another. She ran to the pigsty and saw Keller come out through the little door. He was crying, and he was bloodstained.
Marlene pretended nothing was wrong. She ate, unable to summon the courage to look at him. She pretended to read, pretended not to hear the chanting emerging from his lips.
“Opasimonopasimonopa . . .”
Then she went back to her room. She had made up her mind. Tonight would be the night.