The days that followed caused more changes inside Lincoln. Changes that he didn’t mind. What man wouldn’t appreciate having a beautiful, intelligent, kind, caring, and remarkably likeable young woman at their side every day? Not a day had gone by where they weren’t together, and that was something he’d not only come to appreciate, he’d realized there was nothing terrible about it. He liked doing things with her, and discussing things with her, confidential things, like his goals and cases. Her insight and thoughtful ideas were incredible.
Within two days of when he’d first told her about the fire, she’d gathered and delivered needed provisions for the fire victims. His mother and sister had helped her with soliciting items, but just the two of them, him and her, had delivered everything because Victoria had let it be known that the families would not be exploited. He understood, as did she, how there was little that the elite liked more than to brag about the donations they’d provided to the less fortunate.
His family had always been involved in charitable work, but she added a new dimension to it, a very compassionate one. Most of the fire victims had been immigrants, with little understanding of the English language, yet she had found a way to communicate with all of them. She hadn’t assumed what they might need, she’d asked what would help them the most, and those were the items they had delivered.
Though it would still be weeks, possibly months, before the new building was completed, he was convinced that the families were faring far better than any other fire victims in the city’s history.
Other things had happened in the past two weeks, things he’d never thought of until she’d suggested them, and each one was proven to be effective. She’d done everything without interrupting Audrey’s wedding plans and events. Other than the dinner and card games evening that they’d missed the day they’d first visited the fire site, they hadn’t missed a single event on his mother’s list.
That’s where he was headed now, to yet another function. This one was a ball at the Luther residence. Due to circumstances beyond his control, he’d been held up in court and was now arriving late.
As he hurried up the steps of the Luther mansion, he couldn’t help but think about the last time that had happened, when he’d been late to the Christie ball and had been swamped by socialites upon his arrival.
Moments later, when he entered the ballroom, he couldn’t say if there was a crowd rushing towards him or not, because his gaze instantly landed on Victoria. She was wearing an elegant blue gown, and he felt an immediate inner electrical current, which was stronger than any shock he’d ever received from one of Ronald’s inventions. This one wasn’t painful, it was enjoyable. He liked the thrill that shot through him at the way her face lit up when their gazes met.
Unaware of anyone else, he crossed the room to arrive at her side. The hardest part—the one thing that he didn’t like—was the undeniable desire to kiss her. It lived within him day and night and he’d give up anything for the freedom to act upon it. Though it was extremely difficult and disappointing, he was able to control that urge.
Somewhat. Upon arriving at her side, he took a hold of her hand, kissed the back of it, and then tucked her arm snuggly around his elbow. “I apologize for my lateness.”
“You’re hardly late. We only just arrived ourselves.” Her glance shifted to where his mother stood on the other side of the room. “Your mother wasn’t the least bit upset by your delay.”
“Because she was too excited to sing your praises about helping after that article in the newspaper.” The article had been about the plight of tenants in the aftermath of a fire and how one unnamed woman had taken it upon herself to see that one set of fire victims had been given more than empty promises. He was proud of Victoria, and understood why she’d wanted to remain nameless in the article. She’d wanted it to be about the plight of the victims, and how others could help, not about her. She figured if enough people learned about the living conditions in those apartments, how they were tragedies waiting to happen, more people would want to see changes. He agreed, and the buzz that article had provided was still spreading more than a week after it had been printed.
Thinking of that, he shook his head, before whispering, “I still can’t believe that Audrey’s been writing for the paper for years and I never knew it.”
Victoria lowered her voice. “Others still don’t know it, and Audrey wants it kept that way. Your mother believes Jake wrote that article.”
“I’ll keep that secret, but will Mother keep your secret?” he asked.
Her giggle was soft and light. “She has so far. She likes hinting that it was her idea, which is justifiable. Without her, we wouldn’t have been able to obtain all of the items that we did. And...” She gave him a coy look. “Your mother’s statements have been known to spread far and wide.”
He knew she was referring to what his mother had said about him getting married. “True.” Leaning closer, which caused his heart to thud a bit faster as her perfume tickled all of his senses, he whispered, “Your other idea is working, too.”
“The ads?”
He nodded.
She shook her head. “That was your idea, I just agreed with it.”
“As I remember it, we came up with the idea together.” She had become very interested in John Webster’s plight about having to sell his business. Lincoln had told her that there wasn’t any legal way he could stop a sale, which had led her to researching New York City laws pertaining to business ownership. Although none would help stop the sale, it had produced their idea.
“How do you know the ads are working?” she asked.
He’d purchased ads in all the newspapers, large and small, anonymously, that stated there were laws, regulations, and stipulations pertaining to buying or selling a business within the boroughs. Which was completely true. The ads also stated that people should contact city hall if they were in the midst of buying or selling and had questions. “It’s the reason I was late. Judge Mattheson requested a meeting in his chambers this afternoon, but court ran late, so our meeting was pushed until early evening. He was curious as to why I’d submitted that John’s father’s will be probated when there are no other heirs. I explained that John was being solicited to sell his department store. Mattheson asked if I’d seen the ads in the newspapers, I said I had. He informed me that the mayor is fit to be tied over the number of phone calls and visitors coming into city hall over those ads.” Lincoln was convinced that many of those callers and visitors were being forced to sell much like Webster, and was just as convinced that without her help, he wouldn’t have come up with the idea of putting ads in the newspapers.
She grimaced. “Does the judge know you put the ads in the newspapers?”
Lincoln shook his head, then nodded.
She scowled at him while giving his chest a playful slap. “Which is it?”
He trapped her hand beneath his, forcing it to remain on his chest. One of the wonderful things about attending events such as this ball was that it was expected of him to be overly attentive to her. Unlike at home, where he had to remind himself to keep any interaction to nothing except friendly gestures. “The judge didn’t ask, but I believe he didn’t ask because he knows I would have told him the truth, and he doesn’t want to know the truth, so he wouldn’t have to tell the mayor the truth. He also said that he has a full docket and that it’ll be at least a month or more before the will can be probated.”
“That will give you more time to figure out how to stop the sale,” she said excitedly.
“Hopefully.” He glanced over her shoulder, where he felt stares coming from. “I believe people are starting to wonder what we are whispering about. Shall we dance?”
“That would be wonderful,” she quickly agreed.
That was another benefit of these events, he could give in to his desires to touch her and hold her close, especially while dancing. Such desires were becoming harder and harder to fight against. How that one kiss they’d shared still lived inside him day and night continued to make him want more.
He led her onto the dance floor, and though he knew the distance between them was shy of what was socially acceptable, he chose to ignore that as they danced. There were too many other things on his mind. Like how the curve of her waist fit perfectly in his palm, and how the scent of her perfume was particularly intoxicating, and how he liked the way she gently rubbed his shoulder every now and again.
“I’ve been thinking about something,” she said, looking up at him with those eyes that glistened like stars.
“Should I be worried?” he teased.
She giggled. “No. I’ve been thinking about more ads.”
He lifted a brow and waited for her to say more.
“You are well-known in the city, but in order to win the election for attorney general, the entire state needs to know who you are. Between now and when you announce your candidacy, perhaps you should put some ads in newspapers. Like the ones telling people about the laws, you could tell people about their rights. How the Bill of Rights gives civil rights and liberties to all individuals. You wouldn’t put your name in the ads, just information, until it’s time, then you can tell them how you wanted them to know their rights, including their right to vote for the candidate of their choice.”
“That’s a good idea,” he said, with his thoughts growing even more focused on her. On how she outshone all other woman. Not only in appearance. She outshone them with intellect and compassion and in so many other ways, he was unable to name them all. He credited their pretend courtship agreement for how he’d never noticed so many of her true qualities before now.
“I’m glad you think so,” she said. “I wanted to mention it tonight, because you’ll have more time to focus on other things after this weekend.”
“Why do you think that?”
She frowned slightly. “I’m sorry, I assumed you’d heard that your father will be home this Sunday. Your mother received a message from him today. You will no longer be obligated to fill in for him at functions.”
The reaction inside Lincoln was so quick, so sharp, he nearly fumbled his dance steps. Weeks ago, his heart would never have clenched like this. All of him would have rejoiced, but she’d changed that. He’d already accepted that she’d changed him, but he wasn’t ready to accept not being paired with her. Yet, he had to, because this was Friday, leaving only Saturday until his father returned. Furthermore, Audrey’s wedding was a mere week away.
He’d known this wouldn’t last. Known that from the beginning. It hadn’t been meant to last beyond the wedding.
He hadn’t wanted it to last, and knew he still shouldn’t.
Then why did he?
Hours later, while lying in her bed, with her mind once again keeping her awake, Victoria found herself contemplating the last few weeks in a different light. She wasn’t thinking about Lincoln—not solely. Rather, she was thinking about herself, and how different this visit had been from all the others. She’d discovered things about herself. Back home, her life was about her family, but here, it had been about herself.
Perhaps because this visit was longer than all others had been, and the circumstances were greatly different. She couldn’t say for sure, yet found some things disconcerting about this visit.
She loved her family, more than anything, and always would, but it felt as if her eyes had been opened. By Lincoln. He loved his family, too, but that wasn’t stopping him from pursuing other things. A political career.
Due to her grandfather’s distrust and dislike of politicians, that was a subject that was never discussed. After seeing the fire destruction and meeting those affected by it, she’d started reading some of the books in Lincoln’s library. About civil rights, and how the lives of so many were affected by the choices of governmental leaders. He would make an excellent attorney general, and she felt a powerful desire to help him succeed at getting elected.
She felt a powerful desire for him in many ways, but had determined that was because he’d been the catalyst that had shown her that she could become more than an old maid.
For years, she’d told herself that she’d be satisfied to have that happen. To never do more than oversee her family’s needs and watch over her grandfather’s money. With her grandfather aging, and her mother’s dislike of managing money, the duties of taking care of her family had fallen to her, and it was all she’d ever known. During this visit, she’d discovered that she could do more. She could help others. She’d helped Audrey’s family by pretending to be in a relationship with Lincoln, she’d helped the fire victims, she’d even helped Ronald with his electric broom invention. He’d told her at the ball tonight that the broom was working.
She wanted to continue helping, too, especially Lincoln, and was regretting that her time here would soon be over. Taking care of her family wasn’t so consuming that she couldn’t do both, and it was frustrating to think of going back home where her life would return to what it had been. Where she wouldn’t be able to see Lincoln every day. It was amazing how just seeing him at the breakfast table made her days brighter.
He made life brighter, and it was getting harder and harder for her to remember some things. Like their arrangement. How they would part as friends. She couldn’t imagine a friend would ever make her feel the way Lincoln did. It was growing impossible for her dismiss how strong her feelings for him had become. Feelings she’d never felt before, nor had known how strong they could become. All-consuming.
The list of engagements that Roseanne had given her was now something she cherished, knowing those were times when she and Lincoln would be together. She continued to tell herself that they were still just pretending, yet wholeheartedly looked forward to being paired with him. To dancing with him, to sitting beside him, to holding his hand and touching him.
The feel of his firm muscles beneath his clothing was a thrill that she’d never known and couldn’t describe.
It saddened her to know that would all end as soon as his father returned. They had agreed to continue their ploy until the wedding, but Lincoln would no longer need to attend other events with her or the rest of the family.
That would make those events quite boring, as would be her life be once she returned home. She would miss Lincoln when she went home. Miss him very much. She hated losing things. Anything. And deep down, she knew that’s what it would feel like when she went home. That she’d lost something. That wasn’t supposed to happen.
Rolling over, onto her side, she tucked her hands beneath her pillow. She hadn’t forgotten her original goal of having Walter assist her with her case against Elwood, but that had faded into the background. She still wanted Elwood to pay for his misdeed, and she was still concerned about what might happen if he wasn’t, but was now concerned more about Lincoln. She didn’t want to do anything that might cause Elwood to learn about Lincoln helping Mr. Webster stop the sale of his business to Alderman Kelley.
Ultimately, every thought she had, every feeling she had, was focused on Lincoln. That had been the major change inside her, and she wasn’t overly confident that she’d be able to overcome that.
No one had ever changed her thoughts and opinions like Lincoln had.
No one had ever lived so strongly inside her.
That was clear again the following morning, when at breakfast, Lincoln suggested that they make a visit to Ronald’s workshop, to see the broom. The thrill inside her had very little to do with the broom. The idea of spending time in Lincoln’s company filled her heart with such joy, she’d been unable to contain it while replying affirmatively.
The looks she received from others at the table—his mother and sister—caused her cheeks to warm, and she quickly began telling them about the broom, hoping they’d think that’s where her excitement was initiated.
Shortly after the meal ended, they left in Lincoln’s carriage. “Thank you again,” she said. “I’m excited to see the broom working.”
“You’re welcome, again,” Lincoln replied, giving her a sideways glance. “You were so excited when I mentioned it, that I’m convinced if I didn’t take you, you’d go to see it by yourself.”
She playfully nudged his arm with her elbow. “I would not have, and don’t worry, I won’t touch anything without permission. I have no desire to receive an electrical shock.”
“Good to know,” he replied.
“What’s good to know? That I wouldn’t have gone to Ronald’s without you, or that I have no desire to receive an electrical shock?” In the past, after a visit with the Dryers, it was Audrey she missed the most. That wouldn’t be true this time. It would be him. The way they bantered with each other was such fun, and his laugh... She sighed. His laughter was the best sound in the world. She’d never forget it. Not ever.
“Both,” he said.
His response increased her happiness, and encouraged her to continue with the teasing. “You wanted to see the broom as much as I did, and you want to see if he has the engine attached to the bicycle yet, too.”
“That is something else you shouldn’t touch,” he said.
“You can’t get an electrical shock from a combustion engine,” she said. Then, not sure, she asked, “Can you?”
“When it comes to one of Ronald’s inventions, anything’s possible.”
She laughed, as did Lincoln, but as their laughter faded, a shiver tickled her spine and a sense of melancholy appeared due to a thought that had formed.
Lincoln frowned. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” she said. “Except, well, don’t you wish it was that way for everything? For everyone?”
“What way?”
“That anything was possible.” She’d never disclosed that to anyone that way before, that everything wasn’t possible for her. Much like his family, her family had planned out her life, one that she didn’t want, all the while knowing that she’d have to settle for it. Claiming that she’d only marry the love of her life was an excuse. One she’d come up with to put off the inevitable. She now fully understood what that inevitable was. Losing someone you love.
He opened his mouth, then closed it and nodded.
She wished she hadn’t said anything, but couldn’t take it back. Nor could she take back the feeling that while she’d been fooling Manhattan that she and Lincoln were courting each other, she’d fooled herself. Or maybe it was the other way around. She suddenly realized that she’d been fooling herself for years. Believing that she could control with whom and if she ever fell in love. Why that thought struck now was impossible to know, but it had.
She didn’t want to contemplate why, because it might try to convince her that she’d fallen in love with Lincoln. Mainly because she was wondering if that was indeed what she’d done. Or maybe she was still trying convince herself that she hadn’t. That she still had the ability to protect herself. Protect her heart.
He shifted the reins into one hand and laid his free hand on her knee. “Perhaps anything is possible,” he said. “It’s just people who think it’s not. I would never have believed it was possible for a boutonniere to be switched with a nosegay without anyone knowing it, yet it happened. Happened to me and you.”
She appreciated his response, but had to point out, “That was merely a magic trick.”
“Well, then, maybe more people need to believe in magic.” His grin grew. “Hans the Magnificent made me a believer.”
A hint of joy crept back inside her. “He was quite the magician.”
“That he was.” Lincoln winked at her. “Maybe you are a magician, too.”
“Not hardly,” she replied, yet felt more joy returning. It was impossible to be unhappy when she was with him.
He shrugged and removed his hand from her knee in order to use both hands as he steered the horse into the driveway. “Time to see your broom.”
“It’s not my broom,” she replied.
“You helped design it.” He set the brake and nodded at the groomsman who walked towards them to collect the horse.
“I gave a suggestion,” she said.
“Or two.” He jumped out of the carriage and held a hand up to her.
She took his hand as used it as she climbed down. “That doesn’t make it my idea or my broom.”
Still holding her hand, he looped her arm around his elbow as they walked around the carriage and into the backyard without saying another word.
She tried her hardest to remain silent as well, but lost the battle. “No last word?”
“I’ll leave that for you,” he said.
Victoria questioned what he meant by that, but quickly forgot when Ronald opened the door of his workshop and welcomed them inside. The wooden building was just as crowded with inventions as it had been on her last visit, and she was just as careful about where she stepped and what she touched while Ronald showed them the progress he’d made on the bicycle. To her, it didn’t look much different, but that was because all of the work he’d done had been on the engine. He and Lincoln had a deep conversation about that, while her mind went back to falling in love.
It didn’t seem possible, but it didn’t seem deniable, either.
Maybe it was magic. Maybe Hans the Magnificent had played a magic trick on her heart when he’d switched their flowers that night.
Even if that had happened, even if she had fallen in love with Lincoln, it wouldn’t last. She couldn’t let it. A week from now, she’d be back home. Living her dull life, which felt as if it would be even bleaker than before. Lincoln had goals to accomplish, and he would. As long as he was free to stay focused on them. That’s what he wanted, and that’s what she wanted for him, too. That’s why they’d agreed to their plan, and had stuck to it.
She had to continue to stick to it.
“And now,” Ronald said excitedly, “time to see what you came to see. It’s right over here. I put a pile of sawdust on the floor to demonstrate how well it works.” Leading them across the building, Ronald continued, “My mother claims this is her favorite of my inventions, and there have been a lot of them.”
Lincoln leaned close to whisper, “More than I can count.”
Victoria stifled a giggle at the expression on Lincoln’s face.
“Not including the ones that I refuse to remember,” he quietly added.
“Oh, stop,” she whispered. This, whispering with him, was one of the things she’d miss the most. It made her feel so alive and...special. He made her feel special in ways no one ever had.
“Allow me to introduce,” Ronald said with great flare as he held up the electric broom, “the automatic sweeping machine, model V.”
“Oh, my! It looks exactly like the drawing.” Victoria examined the broom that now had a rotating brush and dustpan attached at the bottom of the handle. “Why is it model five? Did you try that many times since we were last here?”
“The V isn’t a Roman numeral,” Ronald said. “It stands for Victoria, because you gave me the rotating brush idea. I named this original after you, because if it becomes popular, I’ll have to consider other models. Larger ones, or smaller ones, or...”
She heard Ronald’s explanation as he continued, but was looking at Lincoln, who was grinning like a cat who’d just trapped a mouse.
“Your broom,” he whispered.
“You knew the name, didn’t you?”
“Ronald might have mentioned it last night.”
Shaking her head at him, she looked at Ronald who had finished his list of additional possible models. “I’m honored. Thank you.”
“This is the switch,” Ronald said. “I’ll plug it in so you can try it. It’s safe, I promise.”
“How about you demonstrate it first,” Lincoln said while laying a hand on her arm. “Just to be sure.”
Ronald laughed. “I knew you’d say that, and it’s why I have two piles of sawdust. I’ll sweep one first.”
The next hour or more was taken up with trying out the broom and discussing the parts and functions. Even Lincoln tested out the broom, and Victoria could tell that he was impressed by how it didn’t leave any sawdust on the floor even before he said it aloud. He also readily agreed to file a patent.
After they went over the drawings and written descriptions and functions, Ronald walked them to the door. “You sure you have everything?”
“Yes,” Lincoln replied, gesturing with the stack of papers in his hand. “I’ll have it written up and call you when it’s time to stop by my office and sign it.”
“I’m excited about this one,” Ronald said. “It could be my first fully marketable invention, thanks to Victoria.”
“I merely gave a suggestion,” she replied. “You did all the work, and I believe your sweeping machines will soon be for sale at Webster’s Department Store.”
“The model V,” Lincoln said.
She lifted her chin. “Yes, the model V.”
Lincoln had a heck of a time not kissing her right then and there, in front of Ronald, and not for show, but because it’s what he truly wanted to do. She was so adorable and full of spirit. Furthermore, the one kiss they’d shared had instilled a hunger inside him that had grown until he was now starving for another one.
The desire didn’t ease as they told Ronald goodbye and walked to the carriage, nor did it lessen as they drove along the city streets, with her signing praises at having a sweeping machine named after her and teasing him about not telling her that in advance because he was jealous that he didn’t have an invention named after him.
It was all in jest and fun. He’d thought of little else other than her all night, and how their fake courtship would end soon, and he’d come up with one conclusion. Between now and the wedding, he was going to make the most of their time together. He was going to miss her, greatly, and the memories of the fun they’d had would be all that were left behind. That alone was enough to make him not want to return home immediately.
“Do you mind if we take this paperwork to my office?” he asked. “It will only take a minute.”
“No, I don’t mind at all.” She smiled at him. “I’ve never seen your office. Audrey’s pointed out the building, but I’ve never been inside.”
“No one will be there except the doorman, but I’ll show you around if you want.”
“I’d like that,” she said. “Unless you have other things you need to do.”
“No, nothing at all.”
“Until tonight,” she said.
“What are we doing tonight?”
“Your family is hosting Jake’s family for dinner, to finalize any last-minute wedding preparations.”
“What could be last-minute? They’ve been planning for months.”
“I’m not sure,” she said. “That’s what it says on the list of events your mother gave me. Didn’t she give you a list?”
“Probably, I really don’t remember if I got an actual list.” He was disappointed that it wasn’t a public event, where he could hold Victoria’s hand or dance with her. “I knew Mother would remind me of where I needed to be and when.”
“You’ll be glad when this will all be over, won’t you?”
He drew in a breath and held it, wondering how to respond. Honesty was his only choice. “Yes, and no.” He steered the horse out of traffic, near the sidewalk outside of his office building, and then set the brake. Reaching over, he took a hold of her hand and looked her square in the face. “I’ll be glad when the wedding is over, but I’m going to miss you, Victoria. I’ve enjoyed getting to know you better, spending time with you.”
“I’ve enjoyed those things, too,” she said quietly, “very much.”
The hunger inside him to kiss her hit a full-blown starvation stage as they sat there, holding hands and staring at each other. He could remember the feel of her lips against his, the taste of them, the curves of her body as she’d pressed close against him.
His breaking point was hovering, and he felt himself leaning towards her, when a voice sounded, shattering something around him like a glass bulb bursting from becoming overheated.
He turned, looked at the man standing there expectantly. “No, Herman, there’s no need to take the horse around back.” He responded to the doorman’s question. “We won’t be long.”
“Very well, sir,” Herman replied.
While the doorman tethered the horse, Lincoln assisted Victoria out of the carriage, then collected the papers from beneath the seat before he escorted her through the set of huge wooden and glass doors that Herman hurried to open for them.
“Thank you, Herman,” he said.
“You’re welcome, sir, miss,” Herman said, including Victoria in his head nod. “A parcel arrived for you this morning. I put it on your secretary’s desk.”
“Very good, thank you.”
“Would you like me to man the elevator?”
“I can do that, thank you.” Lincoln nodded towards the caged door on the side of the foyer, as he told Victoria, “My office is on the fourth floor.”
The building was old, had been in the family for many decades, but had been well maintained and modernized several times over the years. It was a place he was proud of, and told her how his great-grandfather had helped design it and opened the first office in it.
“How many lawyers work at your firm?” she asked as they crossed the room, their footsteps echoing against the high ceiling.
“Twenty right now.” He pulled open the elevator gate and stepped into the cage behind her, then closed the door and engaged the motor. The elevator cage was small, and they stood shoulder to shoulder.
The sound of the mechanical gears rolling together, giving power to the chain drive lifting the elevator upwards, was loud, but the noise didn’t diminish the desires in him building again due to the close quarters. He felt her standing next to him, smelled her perfume, and had to swallow hard to find the strength to remain still. Other than to glance her way.
The way she smiled at him increased the hunger inside him to an altogether new level.
Had a man ever died from self-deprivation?
If not, he might be the first.