Max opened the door to her mother for the second time that morning.
‘Hi, Mum, that was quick.’
‘It was, darling, but as it happens I had a little surprise on the way to the café,’ Marj said, laying her coat and bag on the sofa.
‘You did?’
‘Look.’ Marj held up her copy of the paper.
‘Fucking hell.’
‘For goodness sake, Max, what’s with the swearing?’
‘Sorry, Mum. It’s Lucy; she’s on the front page.’
‘Yes, Max.’
‘Of my paper.’
‘You catch on quickly, Maxy.’ Marj’s tone was playful. ‘You didn’t know?’
‘God, absolutely not.’ Max took the paper from her mum and peered at the front page. The story had Jade Stone’s name on it. How the hell could she have known about last night? Max felt a rising fury. Her so-called colleague hadn’t had the decency to even ring Max to warn her that Lucy was front-page news. How the hell had Jade got this story?
When Marj had popped out, Kirk had jumped in the shower and Max had grabbed the opportunity to grill Lucy for every ounce of information. She had laughed because for once it was Lucy who was struggling to lift her head off the pillow; it was weighted down by the aftermath of the night before.
‘So this is how it feels,’ Lucy croaked, raising herself up on her elbows as Max came into her bedroom.
Max ran out of the room and was back in again within twenty seconds, carrying a large glass of water. Lucy took it from her and gratefully downed the liquid. The ridiculous concoction of drinks from the night before had combined to give her the most almighty headache. It felt like a wrestler was doing squats while balancing on her head.
‘So why the fuck is Kirk Kelner in our flat?’
Lucy pulled her duvet up to her chin. She looked as coy and giggly as a schoolgirl readying to replay the details of her first kiss.
She told Max in a hushed voice that she’d met Kirk at Sheekey’s and gone to a club with him and Amy.
It felt surreal at the time and it still did, she said. Kirk had sent over drinks and asked them to party with him. What were the chances? Amy had left and Lucy suggested Kirk came up to the flat.
Max clapped her hands in anticipation, willing Lucy to tell her every juicy detail. But a knock had come from the front door.
And now Marj was in the flat, armed with the newspaper. Max marched over to Lucy’s bedroom, followed by her mum.
Holding the paper in front of her sister, Max said: ‘Brace yourself, Luce. Somehow the story is out.’
‘Oh no.’ Lucy’s voice was faint as she took in the front page.
‘Hello, darling.’ Marj jumped out from behind Max and greeted Lucy, kissing her on the cheek.
‘Hi… Mum,’ Lucy said, staring at her mum but failing to make sense of the overload of information unravelling in her bedroom. She was on the front page. And Marj was here. She’d bought the paper. ‘Max said you were here.’
‘Just as well I am, darling. The past hour has made an episode of 24 look terribly dull.’
Lucy and Max laughed. What a bizarre situation for their mum to walk into.
‘Hey.’
Max, Lucy and Marj turned to the man who had entered the bedroom. With a fluffy white towel wrapped round his waist, his toned, tanned six-pack was on show, glistening with drops of water from the shower. He looked from Lucy to Max to Marj and seemed a little timid.
‘Hello, there. I’m Lucy and Max’s mum,’ Marj said, offering her hand to Kirk. In response he released his own hand from where it had been resting on the towel. As he reached forward, the towel fell to the ground.
Max and Lucy looked away, shielding their eyes with their hands, but not before Max had noted he was more medium-to-large in the underwear department than the ‘average’ Sheri had described. Marj remained facing Kirk and picked up the towel for him.
The normally unflappable movie star looked flummoxed as he hurriedly tied it round his waist.
Not sure if it was yet safe to look back at Kirk, Max caught Lucy’s eye. She looked stunned, almost baffled, as she tried to do the mental arithmetic: momentous hangover + Mum + front-page news + Kirk Kelner + his penis = utter bewilderment.
Marj turned round to her daughters then back to Kirk. As she turned once more to face Max and Lucy, she was shaking with laughter.
‘Now that’s what I call funny,’ she gasped, barely able to get the words out. ‘Max, let’s make some tea. Leave Lucy and Kirk alone. Kirk, how do you take yours?’
‘Erm, just milk, thanks, Mrs…?’
‘You can call me Marj.’
‘OK, thanks, Marj.’
Marj walked quickly out of the door followed by Max. As she shut it behind her, Marj doubled over, clutching her stomach.
‘Stop it,’ Max told her mum as she fell to her knees. ‘It’s too funny. I’m going to wet my pants.’