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Lacy flung her arms around Killian's neck and gave him a sloppy kiss on the lips. I saw all the women sunning poolside turn away in one, collective, disappointed sigh.
Killian disentangled himself. He was happy to see her, but also really worried. "What are you doing here? Should you not be in a safe house? Somewhere that the shadow elves cannot find you?"
Lacy shrugged her shoulders with disgust. "That weenie, Trovac, gave up on the project. He got that text you sent him, Maggie, and said if you didn't like the job he was doing, you could fix the problem yourself."
The accusation in Lacy's eyes was totally unfair. I held up my hands. "Don't look at me like that! We thought you had been attacked—"
"And I was."
"—and I just reiterated to Trovac that you were important and we wouldn't be doing business with him if he couldn't keep you safe."
Lacy hitched her hip. "I'm sure with the appropriate MacKay charm."
Killian stopped her. "She only saw how distressed I was and was trying to help."
"Oh?" said Lacy, raising an eyebrow. "You're taking her side now?"
"I am taking no sides! Merely reiterating how important you and your safety is to both of us," he said, taking her hand soothingly.
She appeared to be mollified but I couldn't help but see a little trouble in paradise. Lacy is an amazing creature, but she was a descendent of the gods and could be a little high maintenance in the whole "day-to-day" demands of life.
Pipistrelle was staring at us with concern. The brownie doesn't do well with conflict. So, in an effort to smooth things over, I said, "What fun to see you!" I then knelt down to compliment his little sailor outfit. I'm pretty sure he stole it from my sister's teddy bear collection. I tweaked the scarf. "You are so dapper. What are you doing here?"
"Maggie MacKay! Your mother said you needed my help and it was dire!"
That was like a shower of ice water in a Death Bucket Challenge.
"Huh," I said standing and looking meaningfully at Killian. "My mother said things were dire."
I could see the elf swallow uncomfortably.
I plastered a tight smile on my face. "Well, let's show you your room," I said cheerfully, not wanting to freak the brownie out, even though I, personally, was freaking the freak out.
I motioned to our friends to follow me into the lobby and up the stairs. I don't think Trovac was increasing our per diem and the frickin' hotel was sold out with the conference until the maids discovered how many had permanently checked out last night.
"How did you get here?" I asked, casually. "Because we discovered it's best not to valet."
"Oh, we self-parked," Lacy said, tucking her hand into the crook of Killian's arm.
"And I drove!" Pipistrelle announced proudly.
I didn't even want to think about the brownie driving down the 5 Freeway. "Did you let him drive?" I asked Lacy, unable to keep the tone of warning out of my voice.
She dismissed my concerns. "Only when it was congested."
"That makes it so much better."
I guided Lacy and Pipistrelle over to our hotel room and opened the door. I mean, it was already open from where the zombies had bashed it down the night before. The place was thrashed. Guess the cleanup crew figured no one would be back anytime soon and pushed the maid service to checkout.
I don't know why they thought turning the furniture to matchsticks would pull Killian and me out of hiding, but I guess that's what you get with a mindless horde of zombies. And on the plus side, it seemed like we had actually displayed some good decision making skills in our choice of a Fairy Land escape.
Pipistrelle shook his head, horrified by the mess, but also kind of delighted. Imagine a kid in a candy shop, except the candy shop is broken furniture in need of repair. It was like being presented with the opportunity to enter an American Cleaner Warrior competition and, by gum, this was his own, personal Mount Midoriyama.
But Lacy just turned and looked at me, raising one eyebrow, and asked, "Only one room?"
THAT's what she was worried about? "Cost saving measure," I muttered.
"Do not worry," Killian replied, holding up his hands to calm her down before going over to fix the door. He shouted from the foyer. "We did not sleep last night."
"What?" she challenged, looking at me for an explanation.
"We got stuck in Fairy." I tried to pick up one of my shirts, but Pipistrelle yanked it out of my hand and gave my fingers a good-natured swat before he merrily began folding it Marie Kondo style.
"You went to Fairy?" She confirmed, incredulously. "Hades take the wheel! What were you doing in Fairy?"
"Well, we were attacked by zombies..."
"Hmmmm..." she said. Pointedly, Lacy took the car keys out of her pocket and handed them to Killian. "Be a peach and get my luggage, would you, dear?"
"Now, Lacy..."
She held up a finger, stopping him before he said anything more. "Please, Killian."
Respectfully, he backed out of the room, but mouthed "Sorry!" as he placed the door back onto its hinges behind him.
I can't believe that coward abandoned me.
I sat down on the edge of the bed and rubbed my eye sockets. I was still wrecked from a night spent in Fairy and far too many portals for one girl in 24-hours, especially when forced to do it in heels. I braced myself for the reaming. "Okay. Let me have it."
But instead, Lacy sat down beside me, pushing my skirts out of the way, and gave me a little half-hug. "You gotta figure out a better way, Maggie. You and Killian are dead on your feet. You can't keep running like this."
There's a point when you've been fighting and pushing everything down for so long, your default button assumes the whole world is out to screw you. But then, outta the blue, or outta the blue mouth of a friend, there is a moment of kindness and understanding, and it is like a sucker punch to the feels. I had to take a moment to wrestle my emotions tightly back into the itty-bitty box in my heart where I kept them locked up. "Don't have a choice."
Lacy shook her head. "That's not true." She interlaced her fingers in mine as she got ready to break out a hard truth. "I don't like saying this. Know that I really don't like saying this. And I'm in for the long haul, and have all y'all's back... But is Killian avoiding that Queen worth all this?"
I recoiled, horrified. "I can't believe you're even suggesting—"
She held up her hand. "Maggie, I didn't get where I am today without being practical. And I'm not saying it is a good choice. But sometimes it is important to do a cost analysis of a situation." She pointed at all the busted up furniture. "Because from the look of things, I'm guessing this job is now costing you money."
"I can fix it!" shouted Pipistrelle enthusiastically.
"And I'm sure you can," I replied, not sure if the brownie had the electrical certification to repair the sconces that had been ripped from the wall, but cool if he wanted to give it a try. I turned back to Lacy. "Protecting Killian is worth any cost."
"This is just a busted up room," she said, calmly. "But what about when they bust up your sister's house? Your parents' house? Not to mention what would happen if the shadow elves or fairy denizens take out Father Killarney or Xiaoming. They're some of the strongest protections the Earth has to keep creatures from Fairy and the Dark Dimension out. What happens if they get killed?"
I couldn't even think of how to reply. But that was, indeed, what was at stake.
"Elves live a long, long time," she said, brushing back my hair. "He goes to the Queen for a little while, you go on with your life and get to live to a ripe old age. And to Killian? It'll feel like... maybe a decade."
I regarded her. "And what about you? Are you able to just... walk away?"
Lacy shook her head like she had seen some things. "Oooh... Maggie. That elf is so yummy, I could eat him with a spoon. And I love him something fierce. But one of my hard and fast rules is that no relationship is worth my life. There are plenty of other mermen in the sea and I, my friend, am a catch. I am not playing second fiddle to any woman, Elfin Queen or not. Whether it is Killian or some other fella, if there is garbage going on with one of his exes, it is his job to sort that shit out and then we can talk about us after that chapter is closed." She gave me another squeeze. "Just... acknowledge that while you're busy protecting Killian, this crusade may harm other people you love, too."
Suddenly, we were interrupted by a knock at the door.
I got up, my hand resting on my stake. It was daytime, so things should be a little less fucked, but then again, a lot had happened in the past twelve hours.
I opened the door to discover a bellhop holding a basket of flowers.
Now, they say there is a language of flowers and each one holds a different meaning. Red roses for "I love you", violets for modesty, rhododendrons for strength.
This bouquet seemed to be saying: "Fuck you. You are so fucking dead."
It was a basket filled with poison ivy, oleander flowers, and stinging nettle.
In shock and against my better judgment, I took it from the guy and managed to find a couple dollar bills to hand over.
As I returned, Lacy's eyes got huge. "Is that a basket full of poisonous plants?" she asked.
"Yep," I replied, sliding it onto a small, round table by the window. Pipistrelle took off to the bathroom to get some water for them.
"Who's it for, Maggie?" Lacy asked.
I pulled out the card, careful to avoid the cacti and Venus flytraps, and checked the envelope. "Oh! Good news. It's for you."
She snatched the card, read it, and I saw her brow knit with worry and anger.
"Who's it from?"
She held up the card so I could get a good look at it. "Xiaoming."
"He was never a warm, fuzzy type..." I explained.
"Oh no, this basket is 100% appropriate. It's for protection. The Queen of the Elves put a fucking bounty on my head."