BY OCTOBER, neither word from Myrtle Hawkins nor the appearance of Wilmont Pierce had arrived in Dyea. Grace felt sorry for her friend and tried to offer what comfort she could, but often her mind was otherwise engaged. Peter Colton kept her thoughts dancing on air most of the time. With each of his trips and comments of pride for her hard work, Grace felt invigorated against the growing cold of the Alaskan autumn.
Now, even as she watched Peter pay the freighters for their final delivery, she felt gooseflesh on her arms. He looked up to catch her watching him and gave her a grin. The action made her knees turn to jelly. In all her twenty years, no one had ever made her feel so light-headed and excited.
He tipped his cap to the men, and then before Grace knew it, he was striding in his self-assured manner right toward her. She drew a deep breath, hoping it might boost her courage. Why was it whenever she saw Peter, a part of her felt like running away, while the other part felt like running into his arms?
‘‘You grow more lovely with each passing day,’’ he said, stopping to formally lift her hand to his lips.
Grace blushed and looked to the ground. ‘‘I see you have brought us an abundance of goods.’’
‘‘I’d like to think so, but at the rate you sell them, I doubt they’ll be abundant for long.’’
‘‘The stampeders do seem to enjoy the selection,’’ she admitted.
Peter roared with laughter. ‘‘They enjoy being waited on by womenfolk. Lovely womenfolk. They come to my store instead of buying in Skagway because you ladies have made a name for yourselves.’’
‘‘Oh,’’ Grace said, knowing the surprise showed in her voice. ‘‘I never really considered it. I just thought that your products were superior.’’
Peter shook his head. ‘‘My father is bringing some of the same goods on behalf of a friend of his who’s settled a store in Skagway. You are his biggest competition, and I’m sure if he ever makes his way up here for a personal inspection, he will be green with envy.’’
‘‘How is it that a man has a store in Skagway but isn’t there to run it himself?’’ Grace questioned.
‘‘How is it that I have a store in Dyea and leave it in your capable hands? People are not always wont to move to a place such as this and set up shop. However, if they have enough money, they can always find a willing soul to help.’’
Grace smiled and tucked her hands into her deep coat pockets. ‘‘I suppose I can understand that. Especially since I’m one of those willing souls.’’
‘‘So can you slip away for a short walk? I can’t stay. I must have my ship ready to leave in a few hours. But I want very much to hear from your own lips as to how things are going.’’
Grace hid her disappointment at his announcement of a rapid departure. He never stayed long, and she found herself intensely longing for his company when he was away. Was he driven just as mad by the separation as she was? Did these feelings happen to the same degree for both of them? She knew Peter cared, knew he sought her out before he saw anyone else in their party, but he never said anything to indicate or imply more than friendship.
‘‘I can spend a short time away, but just like you, I must return quickly to my work. After all, we’ve a new delivery to deal with.’’ She smiled rather shyly. ‘‘Lead the way.’’
Peter glanced around. ‘‘Things are certainly changing. There are more tents.’’
‘‘Yes, but not too many buildings. Karen has suggested we build a house before winter, but a friend of Mr. Barringer tells us that tenting through the cold weather is not that difficult. He has offered to help us with whatever we decide.’’
‘‘A house would be good, but it would leave the store unprotected.’’
‘‘We’ve thought of that,’’ Grace replied. ‘‘That and many other things.’’ She smiled. ‘‘I’m sure God will direct us.’’
Peter looked away uncomfortably. ‘‘You’ll find I’ve brought you all some personal items and some special gifts of appreciation.’’
Grace looked up to find him watching her. Could he hear her heart pounding? Could he see the way she felt about him in her eyes?
She pushed the thoughts aside. ‘‘Gifts?’’
He laughed. ‘‘Yes. I asked my mother and sister about the things they would most miss if they were taken away from all civilization. They made a list and I went to work selecting a good many of their suggestions.’’
‘‘Such as?’’
‘‘Well, you can see for yourself once I’m gone, but I’ve brought some teas and woolen cloth, as well as some books for fireside reading.’’
‘‘Karen will be delighted to hear that. She’s been working to help Bill’s children to improve their reading. Since they are staying with us, it seems a good way to pass the time after chores.’’
‘‘The children are staying with you and the Pierce women? What of Miss Pierce’s father and Mr. Barringer? Have they deserted you?’’
His voice denoted alarm, and Grace quickly worked to sooth his worries. ‘‘Not at all. Mr. Barringer, in fact, is the one who found people who knew Karen’s father. He is expected back at any moment. Mr. Barringer then took a job with those who are packing supplies over the summit on the Chilkoot Trail. He’s trying to earn enough money to get the things he and his children will need so that they can head north as well.’’
‘‘It was foolish for him to bring those kids up north. They’ll never survive.’’
‘‘Oh, don’t say that, Captain Colton. I’m sure God has them here for a reason.’’
‘‘They are here because their father is a foolish man. I would never so poorly advise my sister or mother on such a matter. Men need to keep their family members in mind before making such harsh decisions. We are to guide and direct, not strike out at whatever appeals to our fancy.’’
‘‘I’m certain you would no doubt make wiser choices,’’ Grace replied, trying hard to think of another topic of discussion. ‘‘So is your sister very young?’’
‘‘She is older than you by three years. She’s a very beautiful young woman and very proper in her attitudes.’’
‘‘Is she married?’’
Peter shook his head. ‘‘No, I’ve not yet found someone suitable for her.’’
Grace stopped in her tracks. ‘‘You’ve not found someone? What of her desires? Has she found someone?’’
Peter studied Grace closely for a moment. ‘‘I forgot that such matters were a delicate topic to you. Forgive me.’’
‘‘There is nothing to forgive, Captain. I was not offended by your choice of words, but rather the attitude behind them.’’ She could see that he was thoughtfully considering how to reply. Instead of waiting for him, however, Grace continued. ‘‘I do not suppose that every woman with an arranged marriage should meet the same fate as mine. However, I do have a strong regard for the American way of finding true love.’’
‘‘I have nothing against true love, but I only ask Miranda to exercise prudence and not allow her choices to be dictated by emotional heartstrings. She seeks me out on everything, trusting that I can make a better choice for her than she can herself.’’
‘‘How very sad,’’ Grace said, suddenly seeing Peter in a new light.
‘‘Why do you say that?’’ he asked. His tone suggested annoyance as well as anger.
‘‘It’s just that I believe God has made both male and female to be very intelligent and capable. It would be a tragedy if your sister never felt confident enough to stand up for herself and make a few of her own decisions.’’
‘‘Why tragic? Women are the weaker vessel. They are to be protected and cared for. Why should that be a tragedy?’’ He kept his voice very even and calm. Grace couldn’t help but wonder if he was worried that she was too weak to hear the full force of his argument.
‘‘I’m only suggesting that your sister would be better served if she were taught how to handle some things for herself. After all, it is nearly 1900 and women are pressing ever closer to having the vote. Times are changing.’’
‘‘You sound like your mentor,’’ he chided. ‘‘I only do what’s best for Miranda. My entire family seeks my guidance on a regular basis. They trust me to know the truth of most things, and they need me to give them counsel.’’
‘‘How very powerful that must make you feel,’’ Grace replied, finding herself growing rather annoyed with Peter’s arrogance.
He frowned and narrowed his eyes. ‘‘You’re suggesting I do good by my family for my own sake?’’
‘‘I’m suggesting that God would not have you replace Him in their lives.’’
Peter stared openly for a moment and looked as if he might reply, but instead he gave Grace a bow and apologized for needing to get back to his ship.
‘‘I’m sorry if I have offended you, Captain.’’
‘‘Do not trouble yourself with such thoughts. I assure you I am quite capable of hearing your concerns and arguments without buckling under.’’
He took his leave after escorting Grace back to the tent store. She watched him go with some disappointment. She had offended him with her sudden outspokenness, but she couldn’t stand back and allow for his attitude to be viewed as truth and what was right. That attitude, if coupled with a cruel nature, could easily turn Peter Colton into another Martin Paxton. And that would surely break her heart.
‘‘Where’s the captain?’’ Karen questioned as she came out of the tent.
‘‘He’s on his way back to his ship. See,’’ Grace pointed, ‘‘there he is now.’’
‘‘I have a list for him,’’ Karen said, holding up her hand. ‘‘I suppose I must chase him down to deliver it.’’
‘‘I suppose so. Just be cautious. He seems to be in a rather troubled mood.’’
Karen smiled. ‘‘And just what could possibly have troubled the dear captain?’’
Grace shrugged. ‘‘I suppose it was me.’’
———
Peter Colton was in no mood for any woman, much less Karen Pierce. Her incessant calling of his name, however, left him little choice but to turn and await her.
‘‘What is it, Miss Pierce?’’
‘‘I have a list for you. The supplies and things we need most. The ones we sell the most,’’ she added.
Her blue eyes seemed to twinkle in delight at delaying him, and her long golden red hair caught ever so casually with a ribbon at the nape of her neck blew across her face as the breeze picked up. She easily controlled the hair with one hand, however, as she handed him the list with the other.
Peter stared at her for a moment, almost mesmerized by her hair. Why did a woman her age allow her hair to be down in such a fashion? Didn’t she realize the inappropriateness of it? Peter watched, fascinated as the curls wrapped around her fingers.
‘‘Are you quite all right, Captain?’’
He snatched the paper from her hand and looked at it momentarily. ‘‘I’m very well, thank you.’’ His words were gruffly delivered, but he didn’t care. Miss Pierce had been an improper influence in Grace Hawkins’ life. It was her fault that Grace would question his actions with his family. Before he knew it, she’d have Grace running about with her hair down as well.
‘‘Do you have questions about any of the items?’’ Karen questioned.
‘‘No,’’ he replied angrily. ‘‘I’m quite capable of reading a list and understanding its meaning.’’
‘‘Would that men were as easy to understand as lists,’’ Karen replied snidely. ‘‘Grace said you were a bit out of sorts, but I couldn’t imagine it should make any difference. When aren’t you out of sorts?’’
‘‘If I am in such a state as you suggest,’’ Peter replied, ‘‘it is because of women like yourself.’’
‘‘Me?’’ she questioned, raising a hand to point at her throat. ‘‘Me? Whatever do I have to do with this?’’
‘‘Plenty. You have poisoned the mind of that beautiful young woman with your claptrap about women’s rights and personal capabilities. I know she has run away from the authority of her father, and you no doubt had a hand in it.’’
‘‘I did,’’ Karen replied proudly. ‘‘The man her father would have seen her married to beat her. His demeanor was something similar to yours. Women were nothing more than property to him. They were to be silent when told to be silent and useful when told to be useful. You would have liked him, no doubt.’’
Peter felt his face redden as his hands balled into fists. The list was crumpled in his anger and forgotten as he considered how best to put Karen Pierce in her place.
‘‘Either way,’’ Karen continued, ‘‘I know you’ve hurt my dear friend’s feelings. If that is what you consider proper, then I will continue to encourage Grace against your brand of male civilization.’’
‘‘It was not my intention to hurt Miss Hawkins, but she made some rather strong statements regarding the way I do business with my own family members.’’
‘‘Good for her!’’
Peter felt his control slip away. Raising his voice, he challenged the woman before her. ‘‘I understood you both to be god-fearing women. It was even suggested that you put much of your faith into the teachings of the Bible.’’
‘‘That’s true,’’ Karen replied. ‘‘What of it?’’
‘‘Is it not a matter of your spiritual teaching that the man is to be the leader of the house?’’
‘‘In a manner of speaking, you are correct. The spiritual leadership of the house is indeed the position of the man. He is also to be a civic leader and provider for his family. Oh, and a protector as well.’’
‘‘Very good. Then I suggest both of you remind yourselves of this when looking to cast disparaging comments on the role I take with my family.’’
Karen Pierce was undaunted. ‘‘It also provides that women are to be the despot of the oikos. That’s Greek, for your information, and a roundabout definition would be ‘controlling ruler of all that encompasses her house.’ Women are to be the keepers of the home. They are to work with their hands, feed and clothe their families, purchase and plant the lands, and make all other manner of individual choice and decision while their menfolk are off learning God’s truth for them in spiritual training and acting as leaders for the community, as well as earning a living to provide those things the woman is incapable of growing or making on her own.’’
Peter looked at Karen in amazement. She always had an answer for everything. Now she was even quoting Greek to him.
‘‘Perhaps it is you, Captain Colton, who should take another look at the Word of God.’’
‘‘I have no time for such things,’’ Peter replied. ‘‘I believe the Creator of this world to have endowed human beings with great capacities for learning and knowledge through their daily living. I believe I am quite capable of making sound judgments to guide the steps of my family. I don’t need a list of rules and regulations to tell me what is sound.’’
‘‘Ah,’’ Karen said with a knowing nod. ‘‘It isn’t Grace who bothers you half so much as what she represents.’’
‘‘I don’t know what you’re talking about, Miss Pierce.’’
‘‘God is what I’m talking about.’’
He shook his head. ‘‘Are you now telling me that Grace is God?’’
Karen laughed. ‘‘Hardly. I’m saying that Grace’s relationship with God is intimidating to you. You aren’t half as angry with Grace or with me as you are with the idea that you might need someone bigger than yourself to get through life.’’
Peter had all he was going to take. Pocketing the mangled list, he tipped his hat. ‘‘Good day to you, Miss Pierce. I will endeavor to secure the items you’ve requested.’’
‘‘I will pray for your safety and quick return,’’ Karen replied with a smile. ‘‘And perhaps I will even pray that God might open your eyes to the possibility of His love and direction.’’
‘‘Do what you think best, Miss Pierce. So long as you leave me alone and only pester God.’’
Karen laughed and continued to chuckle even as he turned and walked away from her. How was it that in such a short time he’d left one woman behind with a grievous expression of hurt, and another with a laughter that suggested complete joy? Things were certainly not as they should be. Chaos had crowded in on Peter’s very organized life and that was a completely unacceptable condition to be in. He would have to find a way to take charge again—at least so far as his own thoughts were concerned. But while he was confident he could control his own thoughts, he wasn’t at all sure about controlling his heart.