CHAPTER 182

Liza: I was sitting at the table a few weeks ago and an older comic came up to me. He was like, ‘You have to admit, young girls are the worst audience members. You have to admit that.’ It’s like, why are you talking to me? And no, I do jokes for them. They like me a lot. That’s my core audience. You’re an old dude. Are you doing jokes for these girls? Are you catering to them in any way? And then you expect them to laugh at shit when you don’t even acknowledge them? And you think they are the worst for not laughing at jokes that aren’t made for them? So I’m like, ‘No, girls are the best audience for me and old white dudes are the worst.’

Author: Is that true?

Liza: It is. They get mad at my material for sure. I have the worst trouble with dudes threatening to kill me, coming back to shows the next day, trying to ruin my bit, folding their arms. Like, dudes are the most upset because … That’s what’s the most annoying about all these white dudes claiming that MeToo’s ruined everything and PC culture’s ruined everything, is they’re the most sensitive and they’re the most offended and they’re the most butt-hurt when anything is said about them. But it’s like, I was just sitting minding my business, and I’m addicted to my phone, I was on my phone, someone just came up and said that to me. It’s like, people just want to start shit with me.

Author: Who was the older comedian who said that?

Liza: It doesn’t matter.

Author: Well I’m speaking to a lot of comedians. Would they get upset if you said their name?

Liza: Yeah, I’d rather not, it’s like, honestly, they all annoy me.

Author: And also, you said three male comedians went up in the Village Underground one after another and complained about MeToo, and you went on after them. What was it that you said on the stage? How did you address that?

Liza: Oh, it was casual. The only thing I remember I said was just, ‘Hey, on behalf of all women, I’d like to apologise to all the men that MeToo has affected. I know it’s been so hard on you guys.’ And then I just went into my material. I don’t really know.

Author: And how did people respond to that?

Liza: Oh, like, applause break.

Author: Really?

Liza: Yeah. Sometimes when I’m like fourth or fifth in the line-up, and it’s just dude after dude after dude, and I come on, you see women’s eyes light up. They’re so excited. It’s like, they relate to me. They’re excited to hear it. Especially because most of the dudes are doing jokes that are bullshit right now. So it’s like, I can’t imagine being a woman in an audience and three dudes in a row talking about how MeToo is hard for them. That’s ridiculous. And that’s another thing. All these dudes thinking that they’re saying shit that’s so edgy and counter-culture and look-at-me and it’s like, no, you’re the mainstream. Like, what you’re saying is not unique. Oh, you think women lie and rape’s not a big deal? Yeah, join the fucking world. That’s the majority. That’s what’s annoying, these guys who think they’re being edgy. It’s like, no, racism is real and it’s every day. You’re not being edgy, you’re being so common. You’re being basic as fuck. And that’s what they don’t get. They think like they’re being so cool by saying this shit and they don’t realise that people hated women forever. You’re not doing anything new. And it would be awesome to have a dude go up on stage … You know what would be edgy, to actually be like, ‘Oh, wow, dudes suck, we need to change.’ Like, that would be edgy.

Author: And is anyone doing that at the Cellar or at the Underground?

Liza: No, they think they do, but no.

Author: I really like the Cellar and I get on with Noam, and I’m quite honest with him I think, but it seems like there’s an older generation of comedians there who want to keep the status quo where they can say whatever they like.

Liza: No one is stopping you dude from saying it, but audiences are allowed to not laugh. How dare you be entitled. You’re not moving with the culture and people don’t like what you say? What are you talking about? The Cellar’s not stopping you from saying anything. Nothing is stopping you from saying anything. You can perform anywhere. You can do what you want. What are they talking about? People not laughing? Yeah, they don’t like it. If all the women decide not to laugh at a domestic violence joke, they’re allowed to do it. It doesn’t mean they don’t understand comedy and they’re ruining comedy. They just don’t like what you’re saying.