One Month Later
Lucas strapped the leather tool belt around his waist and tightened the buckle. The inside of the house had never looked better, but on the outside, there was still so much to do. The bulk of it would have to wait until the weather warmed up, but a few items, like the broken front step, were a welcome distraction from the feeling that had gnawed in his gut ever since Paige Parker had left the island.
He hated himself for letting her walk out the door. He didn’t even kiss her goodbye, and, damn, he’d wanted to. He’d wanted to take her in his arms and kiss her until her fingers found their way into his hair and her body went lax against his. But more than that, he wanted her to stay. He almost asked her to. But her life was in Chicago and his was with Maddie, and what would he be asking her exactly—to stay with him on a sleepy little island that only came to life four or five months a year? And as what, his girlfriend? They’d barely known each other a week. Besides, she’d made it very clear that she was never going to rearrange her life for a man. Any man.
He pried the loose board free and tossed it aside before placing the new one on the tread. It was too cold to paint it to match the others, so for the time being, the treated wood would have to remain as it was. Paige would hate it. The thought of her matchy-matchy OCD having to walk up mismatched stairs brought only a fleeting smile to his face. Because the truth was Paige would never see the mismatched stairs. She wouldn’t see that Maddie was keeping her room clean “just like Miss Paige did it” or that she’d lost her first tooth. She’d never know how surprised Jenny’s parents had been when they saw the inn. Or how impressed they were with the way Maddie looked after the puppies. She’d never know the difference she’d made in their lives. Or the place she’d taken in his heart.
He’d thought about calling to tell her all that and more, even going so far as to google her name. He told himself it was just so he could find her office number, but truth was he spent more time than he should have scrolling through the images that popped up on the screen. Most were of Paige at industry events or charity functions. She looked formal and stiff in nine out of ten, but there was one photo, taken of her and a man who, based on her description, had to be the infamous Sammy. They were seated behind a stodgy-looking speaker who was no doubt boring as hell because in the photo Sammy was leaning over whispering in Paige’s ear and she was smiling. And not a forced smile for a posed picture, but a genuine, warm smile that brought back memories of the Paige he knew. His Paige.
In the end, though, he hadn’t called, for all the same reasons he hadn’t asked her to stay.
Lucas placed a nail on the wood and swung his hammer. Hard.
Again.
Then again.
He kept hammering nails until the stairs were fixed. If only everything in life were that simple. No matter how hard he tried, he just couldn’t get Paige Parker out of his thoughts.
When he was finished, he took a bandanna out of the back pocket of his jeans and wiped the sweat from his brow. He’d been keeping himself busy since the day she left, but sometimes, when he stopped moving, his thoughts drifted to what might have been.
Paige had been in his life for a such a short time, but that didn’t stop him from picturing her with him for the long haul. Only problem was, when his mind indulged in the fantasy, it was never in his life. No island, no inn, no beach. The backdrop for the bittersweet scenes were always blank.
Because they aren’t real, he thought.
His gut twisted. He had to stop indulging in a fantasy that had zero chance of coming true.
“Whatcha doing?” a sweet voice asked from behind him. Lucas turned to find his favorite distraction standing on the porch holding Floppy under one arm and Stinky under the other. Correction: holding Raymond under the other. Now that the teddy bear had gone for a spin in the washing machine, Lucas was forbidden to call him by his nickname. It was a hard habit to break, seeing as how he’d been Stinky for so long, but Paige had somehow convinced Maddie to let her wash him, which was almost as shocking as the fact that Stanley now lived in Chicago. Lucas never thought he’d find himself in a situation to be jealous of a toy vegetable, but when he thought of the little green bastard possibly sleeping in Paige’s bed—something he was embarrassed to admit crossed his mind almost every night—he couldn’t help but be envious.
“Hey, Peanut,” he said. To his surprise, Maddie didn’t correct him. Perhaps now that she was a mature woman of the ripe old age of five, childhood nicknames didn’t bother her anymore. “I was just fixing the front steps.”
She walked to the top of the stairs to inspect his work. “Looks good, but they don’t match.”
Lucas chuckled. Maddie might look just like her mother, but she and Paige certainly shared more than a few personality traits. “I can’t paint it until it gets a little warmer.”
Maddie nodded. “Does that mean you’re done?”
Much to her delight, Lucas twirled his hammer like a gunslinger from the Old West, then holstered it in his tool belt. “That’s exactly what it means.”
She hopped down the stairs and sat on the newly replaced tread. Lucas joined her. He watched as she arranged her two furry friends between them. When she was done, she rested her crossed arms on her knees and stared off into the distance. He wasn’t sure what she was looking at, but he was happy just to sit with his daughter, listening to the distant sound of the surf.
They stayed like that for several minutes. When Maddie finally spoke, it wasn’t about the seagulls that had raided the trash can across the street, the gecko that had scampered across her foot, or any of the dozen or so other sights that would normally have sparked a running chatter.
“I know why you’re sad, Daddy,” she said matter-of-factly.
Lucas stilled. Whatever he’d felt over the last two years, he’d tried his best to never let Maddie see his emotions. “You do?”
She nodded. “You’ve been printed.”
“I’ve been what?”
“Remember when you told me about how the puppies had printed on their Aunt Paige?”
“Oh, you mean imprinted?”
She nodded again. “Well, I think you did too.”
“You think the puppies imprinted on me?” The conversation finally made sense. The puppies were eight weeks old, which meant they had started moving to their new homes. Even though they were all remaining on the island, Lucas knew Maddie was sad to see them leave the inn. It was only natural she’d assume he felt the same way.
“No, silly,” she said. And then his sweet five-year-old daughter rolled her eyes. At him. He was in for it when she actually was a teenager. He was about to tell her that eye-rolling was not acceptable behavior when she finished her explanation. “I think you imprinted on Paige.”
That one he didn’t see coming. “Is that so?”
“Yes, and I know what it means now because I asked Aunt Sophie.” Maddie squinted up at him against the morning sun. “She said it means you think of someone as family and you love them with all your heart.”
Lucas pulled Maddie into his lap. “You’re my family,” he said, kissing the top of her head.
“I know that,” she said. He couldn’t see her face, but Lucas would have bet all the tax money that she’d just given him another eye roll. He definitely needed to nip that in the bud sooner rather than later, but for now he was happy just to hold her in his arms. Ever since her birthday, Maddie had been telling him all the things she was “too old for.” He knew that snuggling with Dad would eventually join the list, so for now he was going to enjoy each and every one. “But families can be more than two people.” She reared back to look at him. “It’s okay to love both of us.”
There’d been countless times over the last five years that Lucas had been amazed by his daughter. Her inquisitive nature, her love for all animals no matter how slimy, and her emotional maturity were just the tip of the iceberg. But this topped them all. “How did you get so smart?”
“Aunt Sophie says I inherited that from her,” she answered with total sincerity.
“Is that so?” He began to tickle her until she was a wiggling ball of giggles. “Up for an adventure?” he asked as he set her on her feet. “Tide’s out, so I bet we can find all sorts of treasures.”
Her eyes lit up, and just like that, she was five again. “I’ll get my bucket.” Maddie scampered up the steps and, as she reached the door, looked back at him over her shoulder. The expression on her face damn near took his breath away. She was the spitting image of her mother.
“Come on, slowpoke.”
Lucas stood, and as he did, a sense of calm settled over him that he hadn’t felt since Jenny’s death. His wife might be gone, but she would never be forgotten. She would live on in the stories he would share with Maddie, but more than that, his daughter would see her mother’s face every time she looked in the mirror. He shook his head as a wistful smile formed on his lips. She was so like her—not just in her looks, but in the way she thought about the world. Leave it to a five-year-old to point out the one thing Lucas couldn’t grasp. Because she was right; nothing, not the passing of time or the presence of another woman, would eclipse Jenny, but there was also room in his heart for more than one love.
He walked through the house, taking stock of the past while thinking about the future. The daydreams that had tormented him over the last month were blank because they represented a story that had yet to be written.
He dropped his tool belt on the island, then grabbed coats for himself and Maddie before making his way across the back porch. When he reached the screen door, he saw her, sitting a few yards away in a patch of sand, sifting clumps and putting her discoveries into the plastic bucket she took with her whenever they went exploring. She was happy here, but he knew his daughter. She would be happy anywhere, as long as they were together.
Lucas stepped outside and drew a deep breath of salty air as he stared out across the tall grass to where the waves broke in a hypnotic rhythm. In his heart he knew the truth. The castle by the sea wasn’t his life anymore.
Maddie looked up and a smile lit her face. “Ready, Daddy?”
“Just about. I need to call Aunt Sophie first.” He pulled out his cell phone and hit the number he’d dialed so many times before. Only this time, he did it with a resolve he hadn’t felt in years.
She answered on the first ring. “Miss me already?”
“Actually, I have a favor to ask.”
“Name it.”
“Swing buy after work and I’ll explain.” It was a two-minute phone call, seemingly insignificant. But in reality, Lucas knew it was the start of the next chapter of his life.