Quickly climbing behind the wheel, she turned on the engine and drove away, but her vision was blurred with unshed tears. After a moment she pulled over and pressed her forehead against the steering wheel, and let her tears fall.
It had only been four days since Kyle had confessed his love to her and told her he’d ended his relationship with Melanie. She held up her fingers and counted off the times he’d gone to Melanie—that she knew of. When Avery cut her head, later that day when Melanie asked him to come over, and tonight, when Melanie was at his house. Then she remembered how she thought she’d heard the sound of a child in the background when she’d called him the day before. So three times for sure, and possibly four—in four days!
Her heart sank as she admitted to herself that he was not done with Melanie. After staring out her windshield for a few minutes, she pulled back out into the road and drove to Ellen’s house. Bracing herself for the questions her aunt would have, she soon pulled into the gravel driveway that led to the house, then parked and carried the unopened food inside.
Jessica carried the bags of food into the kitchen and set them on the table. “Are you hungry for Chinese?”
“Was he not home, dear?” Ellen asked from her chair in the sunroom.
For a split second, Jessica was tempted to take the easy way out and tell her aunt Yes. But she didn’t want to lie. Besides, maybe her aunt could give her advice. “He had company.”
“Oh?”
Pressing her lips into a straight line, Jessica sat in the chair next to her aunt. “It was Melanie and her daughter.”
“Oh, I see.”
“Uh huh.”
“How did he react when he saw you there?”
“Well, he didn’t know I was there.” Jessica explained what had happened.
“Maybe you should have rung the bell and given him a chance to explain.”
Jessica sighed. “That’s just it. I don’t know that he owes me an explanation. I mean, it’s only been a few days, and he never actually told me that he would be dating me exclusively.” Wow, she thought. Maybe he never had any intention of dating me exclusively. But he had told me he’d ended things with Melanie. Jessica’s eye’s widened as a thought occurred to her. Is he just playing with me? Her heart flipped and flopped uncomfortably, fresh worry clouding her mind.
“What is it?” Ellen asked.
Jessica chewed on her lip. “Do you think he didn’t mean it when he told me the other day that it’s me that he wants?”
“Did you believe him when he told you that?”
“Well, yeah. But maybe he’s become really good at . . .”
“At what?”
Her voice dropped to a whisper. “Lying.”
Ellen’s eyebrows rose. “Is that what you really think?”
“I don’t know what to think. I’m confused. Just yesterday when he came over he told me he loves me, and when I’m with him, I believe him. But then he’s spending all this time with Melanie. I don’t understand.” She stared at her lap and muttered, “Maybe I should keep Alex in the wings.”
“What do you mean?”
She looked at her aunt. “When I failed to make Alex understand that we were done, Kyle accused me of keeping Alex in the wings. You know, as backup. In case things didn’t work out between the two of us.” Glumly, she frowned. “Maybe I should.”
Ellen looked at her as if she were a small child. “Do you really believe that’s what you should do?”
Jessica’s shoulders slumped. “No.”
“Okay then. Stop talking nonsense. Go see Alex tomorrow and get that situation taken care of at least. Then you can come back here and deal with Kyle.” Ellen smiled at her. “One step at a time.”
When she broke it down like that, somehow it seemed more manageable, and that made Jessica feel better.
The next morning after Jessica made her aunt breakfast, she put Hudson in his cat carrier, packed her things, and left. Her apartment was a three hour drive away, so after discussing it with her aunt, she’d decided to stay at her apartment for several days before coming back.
They’d even discussed Jessica not coming back to Ellen’s place at all, as she felt quite capable of caring for herself, but had finally decided that if Jessica had any hope of rekindling her relationship with Kyle, she would need to come back. Not only that, but Ellen loved having her around.
Now, as she drove home, Jessica mentally rehearsed what she would tell Alex. He didn’t know she was on her way back, but she would contact him once she’d gotten settled at home. Deep in thought, she was startled when her cell phone rang over her blue tooth connection in her car. She pressed the button to answer. “Hello?”
“Hey, Jess.”
“Kyle. Hi.” In her mind, she heard the sounds of him talking to Melanie and Avery the night before, and the anger she’d felt towards him rekindled as all thoughts of Alex fled.
“How are you feeling today?”
“Better.”
“I was wondering if we could get together for lunch.”
“I’m on my way back to my apartment.”
“Wait, what?”
“Yeah. I’m driving there now.”
“When did you decide to leave?”
She sighed. “Don’t you remember me telling you that I was going to go home and talk to Alex?”
“Yeah. But I thought you’d at least give me a head’s up that you were leaving.” He paused. “Why didn’t you tell me good-bye before you left?”
Here’s my chance, she thought, wondering how he would respond to her next statement. “I stopped by your house last night, but you had . . . company.”
Kyle was quiet for a moment. “It’s not what it looks like, Jess.”
Jessica gazed at the few cars that shared the road with her, her thoughts on what Kyle’s excuse would be. “What do you think it looked like, exactly?”
His voice took on a conciliatory tone. “I don’t know. You tell me.”
Fresh anger made her words sharper than she’d intended. “Don’t patronize me, Kyle. You know exactly what it looked like. I thought you said things were over between you and her.” She found she couldn’t say Melanie’s name out loud, at least not to Kyle.
“Things are over between us.”
Now that they were talking about it, she found herself feeling more upset. “It sure doesn’t look like it to me.” She audibly sighed. “Maybe you’d better take some time to decide who you really want to be with?” Did I just say that out loud?
“I already told you, Jess. I want to be with you.”
Why does this feel like a repeat of Alex? Jessica thought. Like when my friend reported him going out with an old girlfriend? The similarities felt like a sucker punch, and Jessica knew she couldn’t bear to go through that with Kyle. Not when she still loved him so much. It would be better to make that clear now, before she became more invested in him.
As painful as it was, she forced the words out of her mouth. “Kyle, you’re going to have to decide. As long as you keep spending time with her I . . . I can’t be with you.” Her voice trailed off on the last few words, but she knew it was true. And she knew she had to make her feelings clear.
Kyle was silent, and Jessica wondered if she’d dropped the call. Then in a soft voice he said, “I understand.”
That’s it? She thought. No “Of course I’ll stop seeing her”? Jessica waited for him to say more, but when it became obvious that he was done talking, she said, “Good-bye.” Then clicked off before he had a chance to respond.
She focused on the road before her as her mind tried to grasp the meaning behind his cryptic answer. Was there really the possibility that he would choose Melanie over her? Why? Was it because of the child?
Am I so selfish that I would make him abandon a small child to suit my needs? What if he’s unwilling to stop seeing Avery—meaning Melanie too? Am I willing to let him go over this? And if I’m not, how will I be able to reconcile his feelings for Melanie and her child with his feelings for me? Will it be like a competition between the two of us?
The thoughts flying through her head nearly overwhelmed her, and when she saw the exit for a rest stop, she pulled off and parked her car.
“How about a break, big guy?” she said to Hudson, who was sleeping in his cat carrier on the passenger seat. He lifted his head when she opened his door, immediately alert. Stretching as much as he could in the small space of his cat carrier, he meowed, then sauntered out and walked onto Jessica’s lap.
She scratched his ears and he began purring. “What do you think, Hudson?” When he didn’t reply, Jessica sighed. “I don’t know either.” Leaving Hudson in the car, Jessica walked toward the restroom, stretching her legs.
Back in her car, she secured Hudson in his cat carrier, then headed back out to the freeway. An hour later she carried Hudson into her apartment, and set him down after closing the door behind her.
“It’s nice to be home, right, big guy?” He meowed at her, evidently asking where his food was, and Jessica laughed as she poured some cat food into a bowl, and filled another bowl with water. “There you go.”
After opening the blinds, she felt better. She hated dark, stuffy places, but the natural sunlight helped to lift her mood. A few minutes later she called her mom.
“Dad and I are feeling much better,” her mom said. “We’ll probably come out to see you and Ellen in a few days.”
“Maybe you won’t have to.”
“What do you mean?”
“I’m at my place here in town.”
“That’s wonderful. When did you arrive? Are you back for good? How’s Ellen feeling?”
Jessica laughed. “Ellen’s feeling pretty well. I just got here, and I’ll just be back for a few days. I came so I could talk to Alex in person.”
“Oh. I see.” She paused. “Why don’t you come for dinner this evening so we can catch up.”
“Are you sure you’re up to it?”
“We’re pretty much over the flu, so I think it will be fine.”
“Why don’t you let me bring something.”
“Okay. You can bring a salad and dessert.”
“Great. I’ll see you tonight.”
After she hung up, she knew her next task was to get in touch with Alex. Dreading the conversation she would have with him, she put off contacting him while she unpacked her things, threw a load in the wash, and got her mail.
Finally she had no excuse not to let him know she was in town, so she called his cell phone, half-hoping it would go to voice mail.
“Jessica,” he answered, clearly happy to hear from her, his Caller ID evidently giving away her identity.
“Hi, Alex. How are you?”
“I’m fine. More importantly, how are you? Are you recovering okay?”
“Yes.” She paused, gathering her thoughts. “I’m in town . . .”
“You are? That’s fantastic. Let’s get together tonight.”
His enthusiasm was going to make this much more difficult. “I have plans with my parents tonight. What about tomorrow?”
He hesitated, like her response was unexpected, and she wondered if her delay in seeing him would give him a clue as to her answer to his marriage proposal. “Sure. Tomorrow works. What time?”
She decided it would be best to meet him over lunch—the sooner she got the bad news over with, the better. They arranged to meet at a place near his office the next afternoon, then she told him she needed to get some work done, and she hung up.
“This is not going to be easy,” she said to Hudson, who had curled up on the couch. “Not like before when I’d ended things because he’d been caught kissing that other woman.” No, she thought. This time the reason was because she’d found someone else. Would Alex feel like she’d cheated on him?
She closed her eyes and shook her head, then pushed thoughts of Alex aside while she took out her laptop and got to work.
When she got to her parents’ house that evening, her mother was in the kitchen, and her dad was setting the table.
“It’s so good to see you,” her mom said, pulling Jessica into a warm hug. “When I found out what happened at Ellen’s, I was so worried.” She pulled back and looked at Jessica. “I can’t believe that man actually shot you.”
“I know. It was really scary.” She smiled, despite her recent misgivings about Kyle. “And if it wasn’t for Kyle, I don’t know if I would have made it.”
“What about Kyle?” her dad asked as he came into the kitchen and hugged her as well.
“Did you tell him?” Jessica asked her mom.
Her mother’s lips compressed into a straight line, then she shook her head.
“Tell me what?” he asked.
“That I’m back together with Kyle,” Jessica said, wanting to get the shock over with.
“Kyle? What about Alex?” Her dad frowned, clearly confused. “No one tells me anything,” he muttered.
Holding back a smile, Jessica touched her dad’s arm. “Things didn’t work out with Alex. That’s why I’m in town. I’m going to talk to him tomorrow and let him know that I’ve moved on.” Then she gave him the short version of how she and Kyle got back together, leaving out the complication of Melanie and Avery.
Her dad smiled at her. “As long as you’re happy. That’s all that matters.”
Warmed by the love of her parents, Jessica moved away from the topic of her love life, and on to other things. They sat down to eat and were enjoying one another’s company when the doorbell rang.
“Now, who could that be?” her dad asked as he pushed back from the table and walked toward the front door.
Jessica and her mother looked toward the door as well, as the dining room had a clear view of the entry. A moment later her dad opened the door and Jessica saw Alex standing on the threshold.