"Everything looks good. Let's get you guys into the cabin and settled," I say, removing blankets from them.
"Look at all this snow! Can we make a snowman? Pretty please?" Gracie asks.
"No, it's perfect for a snowball fight!" Max says, already leaning down and forming a snowball in his hands.
"You better not throw that snowball, mister!" Holly says, giving a stern mom look that makes Max drop the snow.
"We can do both, but first, we need to get in, get settled, and get the heat going. I promise we will have plenty of time to come back out here. Can you guys help carry some of the blankets? These are all clean and for us to use while we're here." I hand some of the blankets and pillows to each of the kids.
Then I help Holly with the bags.
"Let's get you inside, and I'll come back out for the rest of it," I say, referring to the bags of groceries Courtney stuffed in my front seat. It's not much, but it'll get us through the next few days before my brother can come up and bring us more food.
We're about halfway to the door when little Gracie comes running out of the house.
"Oh no. Oh no. Oh no!" she says in the sweetest little voice.
"What's wrong?" I ask, instantly on guard.
"There's no Christmas tree!" she says like it's the biggest problem in the world.
"Well, that's because we only have live Christmas trees up here, so we have to go find one, cut it down, and bring it back."
"Wow, we've never had a real Christmas tree before!" Gracie says, running back into the house.
"I know you're stressed, but there's plenty for them to do that will keep them busy and keep their mind off of why we're here," I tell Holly as we walk into the cabin.
This cabin is so remote that only my parents, my brother, and I know it's here. Not even my MC brothers know where it is. Just a few of them even know the cabin exists.
"Where is the thermostat? I'll turn the heat on," Holly says, looking around the house.
"No thermostat, just the old wood stove and the fireplace. If you go ahead and finish unloading the stuff from the truck, I will get both of them going. Max, can you help me?" I ask him. His eyes go wide with excitement. "We got this, Mom!"
Max walks with a newfound confidence, even though I'm pretty sure he has no idea what we're doing.
"We need to go get some of the wood from the shed out back, so let's go see how much we have."
He follows me out to the shed, which not only stores wood and food, but other tools from different repairs we've done over the years. When we hunt, we use the shed to store game meat.
"There's not as much wood as I hoped, but this should be enough to get us through two or three days. Would you be willing to help me gather some more tomorrow? That way, we can stock up on wood before the next snowstorm hits."
"Yes! Are you going to teach me how to use an ax?" he asks, all excited.
"I can show you, absolutely, but you're going to have to be a bit taller to properly use one," I say. Then I stack up some wood in his arms before loading up my arms and heading back into the cabin.
"This is the last of what's in the truck," Holly says, setting bags on the counter. "I'll put these groceries away. Gracie, you want to help me?" she asks.
"No, I want to watch him do the fireplace," she says, running over and holding onto Max's arm.
Once I'm finished getting the fire going, Holly joins us.
"Alright, all the groceries are put away. What can I do next?" She looks around the cabin.
"The tote that was in the back of my truck has clean sheets and towels. If you want to strip the beds of the sheets that are there, there's a washer and dryer in the hallway. We can wash them, so we have an extra set on hand. While they’re washing, let’s make up the beds we will use. There are three bedrooms, and the only bathroom is the one in the hallway," I tell her, pointing to the hallway that's beside the big stone fireplace.
When I get the woodstove going, I turn to Max and Gracie.
"Alright, now we need to clean things up. I'm going to give you both a towel, and I want you to dust anything that you can: tables, chairs, windowsills, books, anything that has dust on it, okay?"
Thankfully, they actually seem excited about cleaning.
I hand them both a small towel and spray it with some dusting spray, and off they go. Pulling out the dishes from the cabinet, which I know we'll use tonight, I hand wash them and set them on the drying rack. Fortunately, Courtney put a pan of lasagna in my truck, so we don't have to do anything but warm it up. Later, I’ll pull out a pan to cook the garlic bread she included as well.
"Sheets and towels all done," Holly says, walking down the hall towards me.
For a minute, I'm struck by how absolutely gorgeous she is. When Holly smiles at me, I feel my heart skip a beat. She's so lovely, with her bright blue eyes and long brown hair. I’m drawn to her like she’s my true North. And those curves of hers? I really want to get my hands on them.
Distracting myself from my straying thoughts, I say, "So, we need to do some cleaning, but we can do it later. Since Courtney sent us dinner and we don't have to cook, there is enough daylight left for us to go find a Christmas tree. Y’all up for it?"
Before I get the words out of my mouth, Gracie is jumping up and down.
Holly chuckles. “I guess that’s a yes from Gracie. And I wouldn’t mind going out for a little bit. Let’s do it.”
“Okay, there are a few rules. It can’t be too big because it has to fit in the living room corner over there.” I point to the wall opposite the fireplace. “It also can’t be any bigger than me if we want to put a topper on it,” I say, lifting my hand above my head, showing I can touch the ceiling in the cabin.
This cabin has been in the family for generations, and people were much shorter back then, so the ceilings weren’t really made for my 6-foot 4-inch build. My dad got rid of the low-hanging lights when I hit my teenage years, so I didn’t keep hitting my head on them whenever I walked around the cabin.
We bundle up in our warmest jackets and boots and head out to the woods. When we step outside into the crisp winter air, we all take deep breaths, enjoying the scent of pine and the wood smoke that fills the air. Right then, I feel a sense of peace settle over me. Gracie skips ahead with Max, her boots crunching in the snow, and I watch her go with a smile on my face.
Thankfully, some decent pine trees are just inside the forest tree line behind the cabin. Gracie and Max race around us, looking at trees.
"Dean! Come stand next to this one!" Max says, and Gracie walks up to see which one he is looking at.
"Oh, it's so pretty!" she says.
I walk over to stand next to it. The top of the tree comes up to my eyes.
Max and Gracie start jumping up and down again. "This is the tree!" they cry in unison.
As I work on cutting down the tree, I can feel Holly watching me. It's as if her eyes are burning into my back. When I take a moment to catch my breath, nothing can stop me from turning around to meet her gaze.
For a moment, we lock eyes, making my heart race. I can feel the tension between us, and I know that I'm not the only one experiencing it. Holly bites her lip, and there’s desire sparking in her eyes. Even though I know that I should look away, I can't. I'm drawn to her like a moth to a flame.
She looks away first and clears her throat before talking to the kids. I quickly snap out of my trance and finish cutting down the tree. We wrap it up nicely and tightly, and I carry it back to the house.
"Okay, we will set it up today and then decorate it tomorrow once I am able to pull out the Christmas decorations. But to do that, we have to clean up the house," I say.
Max and Gracie's excitement dampens a little, but they eagerly help.
We spend the next hour or so cleaning and organizing the cabin, creating a cozy and welcoming atmosphere. Max and Gracie's excitement is contagious, and even Holly seems to be enjoying herself.
More than once, I look up. Watching them makes my heart ache because I want a family like this more than anything. This is what it was like growing up with my parents and brother, and what I want for myself.
As the afternoon wears on, the sun starts to dip below the horizon, and the temperature drops even further. I add more wood to the fireplace to keep it toasty and warm.
"I'm going to start on dinner. Why don't you give the kids a bath now? The water heater is small, so if you want to shower with hot water tonight, it's going to need time to reheat," I tell her.
"But we don't want to go to bed yet!" Max says.
"No bed yet, just a bath. We do things differently out here. After dinner, we can watch a movie," I say, winking at Holly. I'm really hoping he will fall asleep during the movie. It's been a long day for all of them.
I watch as Holly nods in agreement and takes Max and Gracie to the bathroom. As she disappears down the hall, I’m surprised by the pang of longing I feel. I'd love to be part of all these family moments, but this isn't my family, and they aren't mine, no matter how much I wish they were.
When I hear the water running, thoughts of taking a bath with Holly fill my head. What would it be like to feel her skin beneath my fingertips and run my hands through her hair? But I know that's not something that can happen. I'm here to protect her, not seduce her.
Shaking my head, I turn my attention back to making dinner. I break out the food Courtney sent us with and get to work. As I cook, I can hear the sound of Holly and the kids playing in the bathroom, and once again I’m shocked by the twinge of envy I’m experiencing. They sound so happy, so carefree, and I long to be a part of it.
As I finish up dinner, Holly and the kids come out of the bathroom, wrapped up in warm PJs. The kids’ hair is damp and curly, and they look so adorable that I can't help but smile.
"Dinner's ready," I say, gesturing to the table. The kids jump up and down excitedly, and Holly takes a seat.
We enjoy our meal together, chatting and laughing about our day. And as the evening wears on, we curl up on the cozy couch together and watch a movie. We don't even get twenty minutes in before the kids are passed out.
Holly leans her head on my shoulder, and I feel her warmth radiating right through my body. I put my arm around her, pulling her in closer to me. We sit in comfortable silence, enjoying each other's company and the warmth of the fire.
Halfway through the movie, Holly lets out a yawn.
"Let me help you get the kids to bed before you pass out on me, too," I joke quietly.
Picking up Gracie, I notice how peaceful she looks. Her small body is wrapped up in her blanket, and she's holding her teddy bear close to her chest. Max is fast asleep on the other side of Holly.
I get up, carry Gracie to her room, and tuck her into bed. As I stand by the door, I want this with all my heart. I want a family to come home to, to enjoy moments like these.
On the other side of the room, Max stumbles into his bed, and I take a few minutes to tuck him in and say good night.
When I go back to the living room, I find Holly tidying up the scattered popcorn and blankets.
"Thanks for helping with the kids," Holly says, smiling at me gratefully.
"No problem. They're great kids," I reply, returning her smile.
We finish cleaning up, and I walk Holly to her room. She turns to face me, her eyes meeting mine.
"Thanks for everything tonight, Dean. It's been a long time since I've had a night like this," she says, her voice soft and vulnerable.
Reaching out, I gently tuck a strand of hair behind her ear, letting my fingers linger on the soft skin of her cheek.
"It was my pleasure, Holly. I'm glad you and the kids enjoyed it," I reply, my heart pounding in my chest.
She looks up at me, her eyes shining in the dim light of the hallway. For a moment, we just stand there, gazing at each other, the tension between us palpable. I know I need to leave before I do something stupid.
"Well, I should go. Goodnight, Holly," I step back and turn to leave.
"Goodnight, Dean," she replies softly, her voice barely above a whisper.
Needing to put some distance between us, I hurry back to my room.