TAMARACK REALTY TRIED hard to look upscale and mostly succeeded. There were leatherish sofas, low glass tables laden with art books, and framed photographs of the lakes and hills of western New York.
Susan walked inside and took it all in. So this was where Danny worked now.
She had the feeling he didn’t live in poverty like she did. Maybe she should have been a little more careful with that divorce mediation.
Two attractive, impeccably made-up women in their late thirties, dressed in business suits, looked Susan over as she entered. She assumed they were realtors too. She recognized one of them, the perky redhead, from the picture in the store window.
She knew exactly what they were thinking: this woman in her fifties with the old coat and beat-up suitcase is not the world’s most exciting real estate prospect. But the redhead did her professional best to summon enthusiasm. She gave Susan a smile and said, “Good afternoon, may I help you?”
Susan took a quick breath and said, “Yes. I’m looking for Danny Lentigo.”
“Of course. Do you have an appointment?”
No, he didn’t answer my damn calls, she thought. She saw a row of private offices toward the rear. “Is he back there?”
The redhead’s bright blue eyes got nervous, and Susan knew she’d guessed right. Leaving her suitcase behind so she could move faster, she headed toward the back.
“Ma’am, excuse me,” the redhead said, following after her. “Ma’am!”
Susan ignored her. She looked into one office and saw a woman behind the desk. She looked in a second office: empty. She looked in a third.
There was Danny.
He looked handsome and younger than fifty-seven, just like he did on that picture in the window. He was on his computer. She flashed back to him sitting at the computer in their house twenty years ago, with the dial-up internet that made that horrible noise when it connected.
She stepped into his office. He heard her coming in and looked up. Seeing a stranger standing there, his face transformed in a split second into a realtor’s smile.
A second later, he recognized her. His smile turned to shock and then dismay.
But she kept up a brave front. “Hi, Danny.”
“What are you doing here?” he said.
Fuck, I’m such an idiot! Why did I come? I just upset him, he hates me. She wished she’d brushed her teeth before coming in.
The redhead appeared at Danny’s door, ready to intervene.
Well, now that Susan was here in his office, she had to go through with it. She said, “The Monster is getting executed in five days. Thought you’d want to know.”
Danny’s jaw dropped. He waved off the bewildered redhead, then looked back at Susan.
He said, “You could’ve emailed me.”
She looked at him. What a jerk! she thought. Even if I do upset him, he has no right to treat me like this, does he? “I called four times. You didn’t pick up.”
Danny leaned back in his chair. “So he’s getting executed.”
She nodded. “Yeah.”
“How do they do it?”
“Lethal injection.”
Danny looked up at her. “They should fucking electrocute him.”
Susan looked back at him and at last felt the connection she had craved. The connection she’d come here for.
She and Danny were in this together. They always had been.
“Can’t have everything,” she said.
He nodded and scratched his neck. He looked like he didn’t know what to say.
She sat down across the desk from him. “I’m going to the execution. It’s in North Dakota.”
He looked impressed. “Long drive.”
“I’m taking a bus.” Then she gathered her courage and asked, “You wanna come too?”
He blinked at her.
“I know we’ve grown apart, Danny, but I feel like this is something we should do together.” She paused. “Amy would want that.”
“I don’t think my wife would like me spending a week with you.”
From Danny’s profile on the Tamarack Realty website, Susan knew he was married, or at least had been. Now she knew his marriage was still ongoing. She wasn’t sure how she felt about that. Had she been hoping for something different?
But the hell with all that. Only one thing mattered: Amy was their daughter. She said, “You can bring your wife along.”
“I have two children now and I’m not bringing them.”
She had been so focused on Danny, she hadn’t even noticed the photograph in the small silver frame at the edge of his desk. Now she picked it up.
It showed Danny with his arm around his wife, a woman in her forties with shoulder-length blonde hair who looked, Susan recognized instantly, like a younger version of herself back when she used to dye her hair blonde. It wasn’t just the woman’s hair. Her friendly, maybe slightly mousy smile was just like Susan’s years ago.
That was disturbing enough. But even worse, there were two sweet-looking kids standing in front of Danny, a boy of about ten and a girl who was six or seven. Danny’s hand rested on the little girl’s shoulder.
He really did move on. He has new children now, and he loves them.
The girl was cute and gap-toothed and looked like Amy. Danny had replaced everything, except better, because he had a boy now too.
A boy Susan should have had, except she miscarried.
She said, “Nice-looking kids.”
“Thank you.”
“What are their names?”
“David and Emily.”
Emily. It sounded just like Amy. Danny had done all he possibly could to replace her. Susan put the photo down. A wave of fury swept through her. She wasn’t sure it was rational, but she didn’t care.
“You shouldn’t have forgotten Amy.”
“I didn’t forget her. I moved on.”
Susan shook her head in disgust. “Yeah, you sure did.”
Danny pouted his lips. It was an expression she’d forgotten, but the meaning came back to her now full force. He used to look like that when he was about to say something hurtful.
“Susan, I couldn’t be with you after Amy died. The way you were, it was just too much for me. I couldn’t handle it.”
She looked down. He was right. Her depression must’ve been really hard to deal with. He continued, “I thought you and me would both be better off if we tried to forget about our life together. That’s why I didn’t pick up when you called.”
Despite all her shame about having driven him away, her anger returned. “That is such bullshit. We were married once. How could you not pick up?” Was he always this big of an asshole and I just didn’t notice?
Danny shook his head, pissed, and his lips curled—another facial expression she was remembering now. Why had she felt a need to forget these things about him? He said, “’Cause I knew you’d give me shit about something.”
“For God’s sake—”
His voice rose. “I don’t want to see Curt Jansen’s execution. I don’t even want to think about him.” He slammed his hand on the desk. “Goddamn it, you shouldn’t have come here!”
She looked at him and said quietly, “I almost forgot about your temper.”
He closed his eyes and sighed, frustrated. “I didn’t mean that.” Sure you did, she thought. “I’m sorry, Susan, that was stupid. It’s good to see you looking good.”
She just nodded. “Well, now I’ve told you, so do what you gotta do.”
She turned to go. Danny ran his hands through his hair. “I wish you all the happiness in the world, Susan, I really do.”
For a brief moment she thought about asking him for a loan to cover her trip. But she shook that off and started for the door. As she headed out, she saw more photos of Danny and his family on his bookshelf. There were pictures of him and his new wife getting married, him rock climbing on some Adirondack peak, him and his son playing catch, his new daughter standing by a lake—
Wait a minute. Susan stopped in her tracks and stared at the photo of Danny’s daughter.
The girl was wearing a multicolored beaded necklace—and it looked exactly the same as Amy’s old necklace.
There’s the purple dolphin and the pink duck!
But how can that be Amy’s necklace? It can’t!
What the hell?!