20. SAY SOMETHING

 

The monk’s prayer fades in and out between the deafening roar of jet engines.

“O Lord, our God, let Your angels of peace put an end to all wicked strife.”

My mind slips back and forth into the world, my consciousness like the ebb and flow of a tide. The one thing that anchors me is her presence. It’s the only thing that I’m fully aware of. Her hands caress my sides and I taste the saltwater tears she leaves on my lips. But the drag of my mind creates an undercurrent that pulls us further and further apart. I grasp at the faded scent of vanilla lingering on her skin as her mouth presses against my closed eyelids.

“May almighty God have mercy upon you, and your sins having been forgiven, may He bring you to eternal life.”

Things will be safe and right in the world after I’m gone. When I exhale, I let go of everything.