Chapter Thirty-Five

The day of the wedding was one of those spectacular July days saved for magical weddings for brides like Co-Co. The sun was bright, and the clouds in the sky, dotted here and there across the wide expanse of summer blue, looked as if an artist with generous dollops of white paint on his brush had placed the puffs just right.

Last night Kit had been given a reprieve from the rehearsal dinner. She’d had no business being there in the first place despite the bride’s casual invite. She wasn’t in the wedding, thank the Lord. But her mother was invited to the rehearsal, and Co-Co and her mother decided it would be “nice” if the person who’d turned their grandmother’s gown into a “masterpiece” would be in attendance.

That would have meant needing to use the breakup story a day early. She just couldn’t do it and face another day with all those people. That would have given everyone a chance to come up with pity remarks, and God only knew what that would have done to her mother’s mood. However, lately her mother’s favorite topic was the kitten named Smokey. She’d actually told Kit that after the rehearsal dinner, she’d gone over to Hop’s to see the fluff ball. Thankfully, Mom hadn’t popped in when she was in the midst of throwing Shane’s belongings onto her stoop.

Her excuse for the rehearsal had been seamless. Claiming Shane needed to work was totally believable, and throwing in that she’d had to inspect some dresses at the shop had added to the nice tidy lie. As much as she hated spewing bullshit, she’d learned over these crazy weeks that sometimes it was necessary for survival’s sake.

But now it was today—the wedding and the jig were up. She’d had it planned since yesterday, but this morning as she sat in her robe on the back deck, she called the river to speak to her, soothe her, give her strength. The worst part was she was still so full of lies, not just about telling her family that she and Shane were over. That story had been a falsehood from the start.

She took a sip of her tepid tea and closed her eyes when a breeze greeted her. The lie that sat heavy in her chest was the one she told herself when she’d said that it didn’t matter, that kicking Shane out of her life and casting the man away were what she wanted and needed.

She missed him already. She was still capable of telling the truth, and it stung. She’d somehow put her faith in that fireman even when she’d thought her ability to trust was broken beyond repair. Being wrong about him had hurt her more than Brian’s betrayal, and in truth, that part ached like her chest might split in half.

But she’d learned something else since Brian had hurt her. She learned that she’d survive. Time told her someday she wouldn’t hurt so much about Shane. That had to be true because right now she couldn’t breathe. She let the breeze whip through her hair and bathe her face, silently calling to the river with its reliable babble, willing it to speak to her. But all she heard was the rush of the water flowing over the rocks, the cadence all but chanting his name again and again. Shane. Shane. Shane.

****

The dress she had selected looked nice. It had been no picnic pulling all the size eights off the rack and eliminating them one by one based on how tight they were on her body. By the end of the exercise, she’d had two dresses to choose from.

Right now standing in front of the full-length mirror behind her door, she looked at her image. The bateau-necked navy sheath gave her a lean line, and it was roomy enough to give her comfort. But nothing would give her comfort today.

She’d agreed to meet the bride in the small holding room to make sure there were no last-minute stitching needs of the pretty, pretty princess before she made her grand entrance. She was glad that after today she and her needles and thread would be done with her cousin Co-Co. That was the one perk of this day.

Grabbing her purse, she gave herself one last look in the mirror. Lipstick in place, hair billowy and free, she left to go to the chapel where she’d lie to everyone in attendance. Lordy.