CHAPTER EIGHT

-ROMAN-

 

“There is something in the unselfish and self-sacrificing love of a brute…”

- Edgar Allan Poe

 

Roman sat on the floor of her room looking down at the dictionary, scanning it with her finger. Although she knew small words she hadn’t learned enough vocabulary since living with Billy Bob to consider herself intelligent in the least. But she was sure how to spell the word Goon. The last word her first murder victim mouthed before dying and a word she could not erase from her mind.

Moving down the G’s, she squinted to read the letters. For some reason the words appeared to hop around on the page and when she blinked she couldn’t stop them from shifting. Was this normal? Did everyone see words the same?

The definition read:

n. slang 1. A thug hired to intimidate or harm opponents. 2. A stupid or oafish person.

But because the letters seemed to whirl around the only thing Roman could decipher were the words thug and hire. She may not have been brilliant, but she was smart enough to perceive the word hire meant for pay. She couldn’t help but wonder after all of the work she put in for Billy why he hadn’t given her so much as a pile of lint.

“Roman!” Billy Bob yelled. “Come here. I need help.”

Roman pulled down her blue BILLY BOB HOUSE OF HORROR t-shirt and rushed to his aid. When she saw him he was sitting on the recliner with his face etched in agony as usual due to his addiction. “Come rub my feet. I’m not feeling good. You need to care for me! When I die, who else gonna take care of you?”

She was on her way to him when there was a knock at the front door. As she was trained to do, she rushed toward it, grabbed the large silver baseball bat lying next to the wall and threw it open. “What you want with us?” she asked a man who was standing on the other side.

“To speak to Billy,” he said with a glare as he stared at him through the door. “He owes me some paper and he ain’t paid me yet. So I’m collecting.”

Roman’s head spun toward Billy who didn’t bat a lash. When he nodded, she whacked the man in his head and knees before he had a chance to elaborate. Since he was shorter, like most, he couldn’t handle her swift blows or bottled rage. She was like a rabid dog without a leash and before he knew it, he was sprawled out at the bottom of the steps in the hallway.

Roman was so focused that she didn’t see Yoko standing there.

“I guess you got the answer to your question,” Billy Bob said as he walked behind Roman. He was delighted at how flagitious Roman had grown. Many debtors were afraid to come to his house because of her. One never knew how she’d act. “Don’t come around here no more. Unless you want to get hurt.”

He looked up at the woman standing above him. Her brows were squeezed together and her nostrils flared. It was as if he harmed her personally. “How did such a slimy creep get you to be so loyal?”

Upon hearing the insult, Roman was about to spin the man’s head around, which would have killed him but Billy yelled, “Don’t! You’ve done enough!” She put the bat down and he looked at the man. “Get out of here. Before you won’t be able to.”

Receiving his exit papers, the man pulled himself together and rushed out of the building’s door. But when he made it outside Yoko hit him in the knees with her pole, sending him falling again. She looked back at Roman and winked and she smiled back.

“Come outside later,” Yoko said. “I go to talk to you.”

“Bet,” Roman responded.

When the man left, Billy hobbled back up the stairs before plopping on the recliner. Trying to put him at ease, Roman dropped to her knees to make him comfortable. She smiled at him and massaged his feet. “Who was he?”

“Somebody who wants what I don’t have.”

She tugged his toes, and an odor resembling boiled eggs permeated from his feet and was hard to ignore. “Why don’t you have it?”

“Because we have to pull a bigger job, Roman. We need enough money to pay him and the other bills around here. And with Halloween coming if we don’t move now I don’t know what will happen. I need supplies to make the costumes.”

Roman focused on his feet again. Most of his toes didn’t have nails but she wasn’t concerned. She loved everything about him.

“I’m worried about you.”

“I’m fine.” He got up and walked around her.

Roman scanned his body and noticed he was frailer than he was when she first met him. “You don’t look well these days, Billy.”

“If you’re worried I guess you better not leave me then. Because you’re all I got.”

Her eyebrows rose. First, because he was exhibiting emotion for the first time and secondly because she didn’t have any place else she wanted to be. “Where will I go, Billy? No one wants me but you.”

He took a moment to examine her closely. He could think of a few places a woman like her could go. Hollywood, Rome, Africa…with her beauty, she could go anywhere and the sky would be the limit. He saw the men snooping around in their building trying to figure out who the tall, attractive girl was living with him. Although she was not glamorous, he couldn’t help but realize how beautiful she was. Standing 6 feet tall with her green eyes and her wild curly hair, she resembled a Calvin Klein model more than a specialized killer.

“I hear you talking,” he said as he diverted to his usual mean antics. “But only time will tell.” He shoved her to the side, stood up and hobbled to the mirror next to the door. “I forgot to tell you. With Halloween coming I have someone bringing by supplies for the costumes. Paints and stuff like that. Normally I deal with a UPS driver, but the owner told me his son is bringing my order instead. Make sure you let him in. Tell him to put them on the kitchen counter and I’ll pay him later.”

“I will.”

“I’m serious.” He pointed a long finger in her face. “I know how much time you be keeping with that midget downstairs. I don’t want you to miss my delivery.”

“I won’t, Billy. You can trust me.” She moved to hug him and he pushed her away.

Her adoration made him feel unworthy and he despised her stirring up his emotions. He never showed her one ounce of love so why did she love him so? “I don’t need all that affection.” He slapped her hand away. “Just make sure you listen out for him.” He grabbed his wallet and car keys. “You are smart enough to handle that, aren’t you? ‘Cause God knows you’re dumb when it comes to everything else.” After the rampant insults, he walked out of the house leaving her alone.

So that she wouldn’t disappoint him, Roman opened the front door, jogged down the steps and sat on the front porch to wait for the driver. The deliveryman didn’t come right away but Yoko came outside to keep her company.

“Billy racist ass home?” she asked as she squinted and looked out into the city.

“Naw,” Roman said. “Not sure where he at. Why?”

She sat down. “I’m not looking for him if that’s what you thinking.” She seemed sad but Roman wanted her to take her time with whatever she had to say. “Has anybody ever…you know…raped you?” She paused. “That you loved?”

“Somebody raped you?” Roman asked with her head jerking in her direction.

“No,” she said quietly. She’d been raped before but never by her brother. “And keep your voice down. This is a private conversation.” She looked at the door behind her before focusing back on Roman. “I just want to know if something like that happened to you that’s all.”

Roman shook her head but was leery about her response. She took a few quick breaths and attempted to slow down. “No but if I knew something like that happened to one of my friends I would tell her to tell somebody she trusted.”

“What if she can’t?” She paused looking into Roman’s eyes. “What if the person who did it was mentally unstable?”

Roman did a double take. She understood what was happening now; Joshua raped her. “Then I would tell her to weigh what is more important. The love of herself or the love of that person. Once she made her decision I would tell her to live with it, keep it inside and never mention it again.”

Yoko nodded and wiped a tear away that snuck up on her face. “Okay, I never want to talk about this again. Deal?”

“Done.”

Yoko turned around and faced the city. “Oh, before I forget. Dale told me he’s trying to get to know you. And wants to know why you faking.”

She squeezed her eyes shut and shook her head. “Girl…get to know me? For what?”

“He said you were cute and shit, for a tall bitch.” She giggled. “And that he sorry he came at you the wrong way when you were at my house the other day.” She clanked her pole against the step. “Told me he wants to take you out tonight. If you let him.”

Roman thought about what she said. Although she didn’t care about Dale she did appreciate his attention. She was lonely and sometimes that emotion weakened her. She was interested until he asked for a little kiss and she gave him one. Only for him to push his finger into her pussy, scratching her insides in the process. If Billy didn’t come home early she believed he would’ve rape her.

“What do you think? Should I give your brother another chance?”

“I wouldn’t fuck with my brother with Billy’s dick,” she laughed. “He’s not trustworthy and he got a lot of secrets.” She looked out. “More than us both put together.”

Roman rubbed her legs just as a black pickup truck was coming down the block. Yoko was still running her mouth but Roman tuned out a long time ago. She was zoomed in on the truck with grey wooden carts in the hatch that pulled up to the front of the building. When the driver parked and walked around the back of the hatch Roman stood up and observed him. He had taken her breath away.

His tall lanky body seemed to hover over the truck and she could tell before he even stepped into her presence that he was at least 6’4, way taller than she was. Since everybody she knew, including Billy Bob and Yoko were shorter, in her eyes he was a God.

Jackson hoisted the crate over his left shoulder filled with supplies. The moment he caught a glimpse of Roman’s doe eyes and pouty pink lips, he was struck. As enamored as she was with him, he was equally drawn to her.

“Who is this fake ass pretty boy type nigga?” Yoko asked trying to throw salt in the game.

“I don’t know. But I’m trying to find out.”

“Well I don’t like him,” Yoko warned. “If I were you I’d be careful.”

“Well you ain’t me so fall back.”

When Jackson approached Roman, although she was standing on the top step, she noticed that they were eye to eye. “Mind opening the door for me, sexy?” he asked her. “Or are you gonna make me wait?”

She swallowed. His directness was something she was not used to. It was refreshing almost. Quickly she rushed to open the door for him and noticed she needed to look up at him. She followed him upstairs to her apartment and when he was near, she caught a whiff of his manliness. It smelled as if he’d been in the fields all day but it wasn’t offensive. In fact, it was like an aphrodisiac and she felt things awaken in her body she never felt before.

As he walked through the apartment, Roman examined his frame. His light brown hair was cornrowed to the back and his eyes seemed to sparkle. With his eyes being brown and Roman’s being green, she wondered if they had a child what color its eyes would be.

The white wifebeater he wore showcased the definition in his muscles but it wasn’t like he was trying too hard. Jackson hadn’t been in a gym a day in his life but you’d never know it to look at his body. The sun’s rays sneaking through the windows as he stood in the living room bounced off his brown skin, causing it to look like golden syrup.

In all of Romans’ life, she never met a man more attractive and she doubted she ever would.

“Where can I put it, pretty?” he asked giving her another compliment in less than one minute.

She blushed and quickly put the smile away when she realized she probably looked moronic. She pointed toward the left and said, “On the table.”

Jackson placed the order down and walked back toward the door but stopped short of leaving. “The name’s Jackson Tate. And you are?”

“Roman.”

Upon hearing her name, he tilted his head. “Wow. Roman. A powerful name for such a beautiful girl.” He squeezed her chin softly. “I like it.” He winked. “Tell Billy he can pay me later. But whether he does or not, I have to be honest. I feel myself coming back for you. I hope that’s cool.”

 

****

 

Cindy Lou steered the car while Billy Bob sat in the passenger seat rubbing his noxious smelling feet. Normally Roman would be irritated with Cindy’s presence but today was different. She wanted Billy to have someone to keep his attention so that she could think about her new friend.

Ever since she met Jackson, she was in a world of her own and nothing anybody could say or do would bring her out of it. Repeatedly she replayed in her mind how he called her pretty and sexy and suddenly she wanted to live up to his standards. But where would she start? She wasn’t a beauty queen. A thug maybe. But beautiful? If only she could see him again so he could explain himself, tell her exactly what made her so special, she’d know where to start.

“What you thinking about back there?” Billy asked with a scowl on his face. “I been talking to you for the last five minutes only for you to ignore me.”

“Sorry,” she whispered.

“Leave the girl alone,” Cindy said jealously. “You show her too much attention as is. She’s a woman now. With her own thoughts and perspectives. Keep your mind on me. Where it belongs.”

“Don’t tell me where to keep my mind.” He frowned. “I’m talking to the girl anyway.” He looked back at her. “Like I was saying, sorry don’t pay the bills, Roman.” He focused back on the road and now he had her full attention. “I was saying we have to hit another house. Cindy knows about a few that will be good scores.” He ran his finger in between his toes and sniffed it before putting his sock on. “It could be our biggest hit.”

“Okay, Billy,” she responded as she looked at the back of Cindy’s head and rolled her eyes. “Whatever you want. You know I got you.”

It was no secret that she hated Cindy but her involving herself in Billy’s and her affairs by finding homes made her despise her even more. Roman preferred as few people involved in the robberies as possible. She also didn’t like Cindy because with Billy, she was slumming. And when she was done getting high she’d rush back to her rich husband.

“These people were involved in your mother’s murder too,” Billy added.

As always, whenever he wanted to give her a reason to commit crime he would lie about who killed her mother. It was unnecessary. She didn’t need a reason to maim anymore. Roman’s life was bland and committing crime was the only thing she knew she was great at.

“We’re going to move on it tomorrow, Roman,” Billy said.

 

****

 

When they walked into the grocery store Billy bossed Roman around as she tossed everything he wanted in the basket. She just placed a few cans of corn into the cart when she saw Jackson and a pretty brown-skinned girl with an ass too large to be real chattering. Roman was stuck. She knew it was unlikely that a man like him would be single but she didn’t want to see him with another girl either.

Jackson was all smiles until he looked ahead and saw Roman ogling him. He acknowledged her with a wink and swaggered in their direction, leaving the woman back by the frozen goods. “Sir,” Jackson said nodding at Billy first. “I trust the product I dropped off was to your liking.”

There was that smell again that was unique to Jackson that drove Roman bat shit.

Billy may have been frowning but the young man had Roman and Cindy’s undivided attention.

“Yes, but I asked for canary paint and got yellow,” he grunted. “I told your family before to make sure my orders are exactly as I specify. Don’t know why you can’t get it right.”

Instead of getting angry, he said, “You’re correct, sir. I’m sorry about that. I’ll make sure that it doesn’t happen again.” Jackson’s eyes moved slowly off of Billy’s ugliness and onto Roman’s prettiness. Although the frumpy House of Horror t-shirt threatened to drown out her figure, he could see through the threads as if he had x-ray vision. “I’ll bring you over some fresh paint tomorrow.” The comment was for Billy but you’d never know it as hard as he eyeballed Roman.

“Good,” Billy grumbled. When he saw him goggling Roman seductively he pinched her on the back, out of sight of Cindy and Jackson. Roman immediately adjusted her sight. With Roman under control, Billy Bob looked at Jackson. “I’ll look for the package tomorrow.”

“Good day,” Jackson said before touching the tip of his baseball cap and tilting his head slightly forward. He looked at Roman once more and winked again. “Later, pretty. Remember what I said the last time I saw you.”

“Bye, Jackson,” Cindy waved as if he was talking to her.

When he walked away Billy Bob said, “I can’t stand that motherfucker. Think he’s better than everybody else ‘cause his people own that factory.” He looked over at Roman who was still staring in Jackson’s direction. “Well, back in my day my people would own him.”

“I don’t know, Billy,” Cindy said licking her lips. “I think he’s nice enough.”

“You would.”

Billy was used to Cindy being a whore so he wasn’t surprised in the least. But he would be damned if he’d let Jackson dig his claws into his prize. “Don’t even think about it, Roman.” He paused. “Niggers like that never go for niggers like you.”