Tasha didn’t know how long she had been sitting there. She felt as if her heart had been ripped from her body. She didn’t know how she was going to continue, how she could possibly rebuild her life without Charlie by her side. She wiped her tear-stained cheeks and marvelled at the power of love, how it could make you feel the dizzy heights of elation and joy whilst also, when taken away, the very darkest despair. She felt quite light-headed. Looking at the bottle of wine, she realised she had drunk over two thirds without really noticing. And she hadn’t eaten anything since breakfast.
A storm was brewing. Tasha listened to the sound of the wind as it whipped against the window, lost in her thoughts. The windows rattled. There was a light tapping sound. She strained her ears. It came again, just as it had on Friday night. Tasha got up from her chair and walked into the hallway. Suddenly her heart was pounding. Maybe Charlie had changed his mind? She stumbled to the front door and pulled it open, adrenaline coursing through her veins.
Javier was standing there. ‘Oh!’ she said, trying not to show her disappointment. ‘Hi.’
‘Tasha. Are you OK?’ he asked. She had clearly been crying: her eyes were puffy and swollen, her face blotchy and red. ‘I saw the children earlier on their way back from school. They told me about your brother. I’m so sorry.’
‘Thank you.’ She wiped her eyes with her sleeve. ‘It was my brother-in-law actually, Charlie’s brother.’
‘What a terrible tragedy. I saw Charlie leave…’ He paused. ‘He doesn’t live here any more, does he?’
Tasha suspected he had wanted to know the answer to that particular question for some time. She shook her head, unwilling to elaborate.
‘I thought I’d come over to see if you were all right. If you want some company? I know how it feels to lose someone close to you…’
Tasha wondered what he meant, who he had lost. She took one look at the sympathy in his eyes and collapsed into tears once again. He took a step closer to her and embraced her in a heartfelt hug.
The hum of an engine approaching caught her attention. She opened her eyes.
Charlie’s face was staring at her through the rain-spattered window of a taxi. He had come back! As she broke away from Javier’s arms, realising with utter panic how it would look to Charlie, she saw him say something to the driver, who pulled away, driving off down the road. The hurt in Charlie’s eyes had been unmistakeable.
‘CHARLIE!’ she shouted, running down the street. But it was too late. He had gone. How would she ever explain what she had been doing in Javier’s arms? ‘Shit!’ she shouted.
‘Charlie?’ Javier repeated, his voice revealing his confusion as he followed her out onto the street.
‘He just pulled up… he’s driven off. He must have seen us hugging. Oh, for Christ’s sake!’ Tasha put her head in her hands in exasperation. How typical that he would turn up at that bloody moment. She took a deep breath. ‘Look, Javier, thank you for coming to see if I’m OK. I am fine. I promise. But, I’ve got to go…’
She ran up the steps and into the house, closing the door behind her, leaving Javier looking at her somewhat bewildered. She sprinted into the kitchen and grabbed her phone, calling Charlie on speed dial. It rang straight through to his voicemail.
‘Look, Charlie, it’s me,’ she said. ‘I promise that wasn’t what it looked like. Please, you have to believe me. He rang the bell, I thought it was you. I was praying it was you. I opened the door and he was just standing there. He asked me about the funeral – the kids had told him about Andrew. Before I knew it, I’d burst into tears and he had hugged me… The next thing I know I open my eyes and you are right there in the taxi. I promise nothing happened! He’s gone now. Please, come back…’ She ended the call, pacing around the kitchen. She could scream with frustration. Of all the things to have happened, that was the worst possible scenario she could imagine. What had he been coming back for? What if that really had been him deciding to give her another chance? There was no way he would now he’d seen her with Javier. She crumpled onto the floor and stared at her phone, willing Charlie to call her back. She sent him messages and called him again and again but there was no answer. It was too late. She had ruined her last chance. Perhaps it was no more than she deserved. After all, if Becca and Andrew couldn’t have a happy ending, why should she?