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BRANDON
I THROW THE LAST PIN on the dartboard, but it doesn’t hit the bull’s eye. I blow out a sharp breath of frustration. “I can’t do it, Ollie. Not again.”
“Relax, man.” He stands, pulls the pins, and hands them back to me. “When are you telling her, then?”
“I told her it won’t take a month, but it’s been another week.”
I can only connect with her by eating the meals she prepares for me. She’d always leave a note, saying ’Enjoy your day’ or ’I miss you’ and I can’t even write back.
Oliver sits on the desk’s corner.
“You still have to tell her.”
“This is too much.” I aim for the bull’s eye once more and throw the pin. It barely hit the center. I groan. “How am I supposed to tell her that I am going to be away for such a long time?”
“It’s going to take a year,” Ollie reminds. “You need a lot of time to completely change yourself. You need to learn everything again. It’s like, back to basics. So, you have to tell Alayna about this.”
I stop.
“Did he agree to perform the surgery?”
“Cassius won’t let other hands touch you. Whether you like it or not, he’s going to be your surgeon. He is smart and the most capable person. He’s the most knowledgeable in your case. You’ve got to trust him, buddy. He’s behind all this progress you are having right now. He’s the reason why Alayna can hold you and why you can walk outside again. I am just here on his behalf since you don’t want to see him.”
“You know it’s not like that,” I say, my voice raised. “It’s the fact that he was the first person to know and didn’t tell me that Casey was my sister when he was my best friend. You know how devastated I was when I found out about it.”
“Well, I’m sorry. I was upset about that, too. If I were Cassius, I don’t know if I would be able to tell you. It was what our father wanted.”
“I know, but it’s not just that.” I sit on the chair and squeeze my temple.
“It’s been a year, Brandon. We cannot change it anymore.”
“He was getting in the way all the time!” I snap. “He provoked me, and then he touched me. He shut me off with that bloody medicine again, Ollie. I almost fucking died. I just can’t forget that. He knows that Casey is the only one I have left, and she doesn’t even know about it.”
“Brandon, he didn’t mean to hide it from you,” he answers, his expression remained composed. “He’s just afraid. No one can know that she’s your sister. Her life could be in danger too. What happened last year was an accident. He didn’t mean to hurt your feelings.”
“It looks like I don’t have a choice at all,” I dismiss. “I wouldn’t want anyone, anyway.” I hate to admit it, but Cassius is the only person I can trust with the surgery. He knows me, and that’s enough.
I guess there is no turning back now. I toss the last dart pin I’m holding and, this time, I hit the bull’s-eye.
“Your turn.”
He puts his arm over my shoulder and chuckles. “I didn’t know that I would get to play this with you, but I’m starving.”
“I can do this all day.”
“You need to exercise, but why don’t we eat first?”
“I’m staying here. I’ll wait for you.”
“Oh, come on!” He pats my back. “Alayna must’ve prepared something special.”
“Then you bring it here.”
“Hey, I thought of something,” he suddenly says.
“What?”
“Why don’t you just go on a date with Alayna? Of course, it won’t be in public. It would be a perfect time to tell her. What do you think?”
“How am I supposed to tell her that we won’t see each other for a while after the most fantastic date we ever had, hmm?” I raise an eyebrow.
“So, are you just going to disappear?” He steps in front of me, holding my shoulders. “Come on, Brandon. You can’t do that. She’ll be very disappointed. Who knows, she might meet someone else in your absence,” he jokes, but Oliver knows it’s also possible.
Over my dead body. I groan. I am fine with anything that I’ll be going through, but that’s one thing I couldn’t let happen.
He pats my back. “You’re already seething.”
I grit through my teeth. “Where can I take her then? You know my condition.”
“Is it going to be me again? You have nothing to do tomorrow. What about you take her to Aunt Grethe’s villa in Portland? The place is well maintained by the caretakers, though no one has lived there since. It would be far, but it would be private.”
“Yes, of course,” I mumble.
My mother’s villa. I almost forgot that place.
“What do you think? It’s a good idea, isn’t it?”
I look up at him. “Will you be able to fly us there?”
“And you really can’t do anything without me,” he says but couldn’t hide the delight in his face. He chuckles. “I wouldn’t miss the fun. There won’t even be a single person in the neighborhood. Besides, it’s a very romantic place. I’d like to fly you there if you allow me to take Betty.”
I frown. “Your girlfriend?”
“My fiancée,” he corrects.
“Ah, right.” I smile. “Of course, you can take her.”
“Yes! This is why I like you. The Brandon Lucien I know is still there.”
“Only if you take us there.”
“Oh well, that’s my job to do,” he nods. “I as well get paid for it. Besides, I’d like to give Betty a tour.”
“You can do whatever you want.” I pat his shoulder. “Hey, I’d like to see Alayna tonight, and I’ll tell her the plan. I’ll probably join you downstairs to eat.”
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ALAYNA
CASEY HAS BEEN SO MUCH help in the last few days. She’s easy to work with, she doesn’t brag about her skills and is a great listener. She easily gets fascinated with the simple things I tell her, especially about my experiences in culinary. She also speaks about still not having a boyfriend for a long time because Oliver and Cassius don’t approve, but she respects her brothers so much.
The more I look at her, the more she reminds me of Brandon. They have the same shade of eyes and hair—the way they smile and gazes at people are so similar. She told me that the Katrakis genes are pale skinned with blue and green eyes tint, just like Oliver and Cassius, and a lot of them are blonds.
I’m always attracted to blonds. My exes are blonds, so I wonder why I’m attracted to Brandon. He’s so different from any other man I met. He is mysterious and caring in his way.
A knock on the door interrupts us.
“Is dinner ready?” Oliver’s voice echoes in the kitchen.
“Yes, I’m just making a sauce.” I lift the bowl, showing him what I’m making.
He sniffs the air. “Smells good.”
“I just hope he’ll like it. I’ll write another note.”
“No need, Alayna.” He flashes out a sweet grin. “He’s going to see you.”
“Oh, God, I’ll hurry up.”
“Easy. You have the whole night,” Casey joins in and giggles. “I know you’ve been waiting for this.”
“And she won’t just have the whole night. Brandon’s free tomorrow.” Oliver winks at me, grinning.
“Oh, wow. Really?” My gaze springs back and forth between the siblings. “I can’t wait to be with him again. Thank you, you two.”
I put the sauce in a bowl and place it beside the steak for the final touch. “All done.”
“I’ll carry it for you, and we can have dinner together,” he offers, but Casey quickly holds his arm.
“Hey, you should let her bring it to him, you know,” Casey rolls her eyes at her brother. “We don’t want to disturb them.” She lifts the tray and hands it to me. “We can have dinner here, Alayna. We’ll be fine.”
BRANDON IS ON THE COUCH busy scribbling notes on his iPad when I enter his room. He puts down the gadget when he sees me. He smiles sweetly as he stands and walks towards me. I stop pushing the trolley and wait for him to reach me. He cups my face and leans over. His lips land on my mouth while I’m still surprised and dazed. Brandon slips his arm around my waist and squeezes me tighter. I pull away.
“Wait...”
He frowns. “What?”
“You can kiss me now, right?”
His expression softens. “I already kissed you last week, if I wasn’t mistaken, or was it a dream?”
I chuckle. “No. It’s not a dream.” I slip my arms around his neck, inhaling his sandalwood perfume. He feels warm. “You surprised me, well, now I’m ready. Kiss me again.”
He smiles and dips his face again to mine. His lips are playful in the next attempt. His tongue plays on the top of my lips, parting them. He thrust his tongue into my mouth, exploring me inside. His breath tastes like mint and chocolate, both his hand trails down my thighs, then he lifts me, wrapping my legs around his waist.
Brandon’s expert mouth went down my neck, leaving my lips much hungrier for him. The sensation is too much. I moan. He brings me to the couch without breaking the kiss. I sit on his lap and jolts when I feel his hard center... Whoa!
“Brandon!” I moan as he runs his tongue between my chest and sucks me there. “Your dinner is going to get cold...”
“Hmm, is it?” he whispers, but then he went back to my chest until his expert mouth reaches the tip of my cleavage.
“As much as I wanted to do this, I am starving, and I didn’t eat lunch because I’ve been preparing this since morning,” I say, catching my breath.
He stops, frowning. “You skipped lunch?”
“Oh—yeah.”
“I don’t want you skipping meals for something like this,” he says softly.
“I won’t. We can do this later. I want to kiss you all over if you don’t mind.”
“I won’t mind,” he answers hoarsely.
“Shall we eat now?”
“I’d rather eat you first,” he states but lifts me and puts me on the couch.
Brandon walks towards the food trolley and opens the lid. I can’t help but admire his pure male aesthetic. He is sexy as hell.
“No note tonight?” he teases.
I grin. “Do you prefer the note?”
“I prefer you to say every single word. Hmm.” He sits back next to me and squeezes me to his side. He kisses my temple. “Your cooking always smells good.”
I curl my arms around his waist. “Can I stay tonight? We can watch movies. I’ll sleep on the couch.”
He hands me a plate with the food I made on it and grabs one for himself.
“Why would you sleep on the couch?” he says.
“Oh, would you rather sleep on the couch?” I joke.
“You can sleep in my bed with me,” he says simply and begins slicing his steak with a knife. “Besides, it’s hard to explore every inch of you if you were on the couch. Unless you prefer the other way. I can make an exception.” He winks and eats a forkful of his food.
I gape at him, unable to speak for a moment. What he said makes me so damn warm. His words alone sent intense bolts to my stomach, tracing down my core.
“But would that be fine?”
“Hmm... This is delicious,” he praises as he chews. “You haven’t made this before. Another improvised recipe?”
I eat a portion of mine and swallow it down before I speak again, “No, actually, it’s the sauce.”
He forks another piece and brings it to my mouth. “Say, ah...”
“What? No!”
“Let me feed you.”
My cheeks flare. I hesitate, but he is insisting, so I slightly open my mouth, and when he’s about to feed me the steak, he eats it.
“Hey!”
He laughs deliciously at his prank. But he picks up a piece using his fingers.
“Here.”
I immediately eat the food and suck the tip of his thumb.
He froze, and his expression turned serious. His gray eyes are now watching me with thirst. The palpable tension itself gives me goosebumps and tickles my insides for a second time.
He shakes his head, chuckling.
“Bad girl,” he murmurs and pressed a small kiss to my temple. “Let’s just eat for now.”
I come out of the room for a bit after our little dinner. When I return later, Brandon is now sitting on his bed with his legs crossed while holding his iPad. I realize that he changed the bed covers as well.
He smiles at me. “I just thought it might be comfortable for you if I change the covers.”
“Are we going to sleep now?” I ask. It’s kind of early, and I still want to spend more time with him with my conscious mind.
He puts his iPad down. “Would you like to?”
I move closer to him and run a finger over his bedsheets. “Not yet.”
“Good.” He steps off the bed and takes my hand. “Come, I want to show you something.”
Wondering where he’s going, I just let him take me. We walk back to his living room and open another door I hadn’t noticed before.
I frown. Just how many secret doors does he have? It doesn’t look like a door at first. It seems more like a part of the mural.
I can feel his hand tightening around mine as he fires up the room’s lights. My jaw drops when a peculiar place flashes before my eyes.
A wall made of tinted glass is filled with large monitors and computers. Each computer facing each other, with at least ten workstations. Bright, neon green lights illuminated the mainframe. I didn’t know anything about computers, but I could tell this wasn’t just a regular office. Then, one particular room sends chills down my spine.
I see one side of the wall—like a window. It’s another room. A white room. My whole body quivers as I see the same telephone, the desk, and the chair...
I gulp hard. “Gee, Brandon. You could see me in there.”
His expression hardens. “Yes...”
“Why are you suddenly showing me this?” I ask but can’t take my eyes off the strange view.
I hear his breath quicken and feel his anxiety in his sweaty palms. He’s nervous, but he’s trying.
“I wanted to show you how I was before I met you,” he confesses.
“Before?”
“I never want to use it again after you,” he whispers, his voice tortured and vulnerable.
“Is that why you suddenly stopped answering the phone?”
He nods. “You’ve changed me.”
I blow out a sharp breath. I don’t know what to say. The tension around us is unfathomable. It must be so hard for him to show this to me.
I clear my throat and decide to lighten up the atmosphere. “What are those computers for? The big monitors? Is this where you work?”
“This is the prototype of the company’s mainframe,” he explains. “Ollie and I built this ourselves. Some monitors are for the CCTVs, but it isn’t just to spy on people. I need to see if someone is going to break in.” He turns and gazes at me. “You see, Alayna. I’m paranoid. I want you to know at least this part of me.”
“Alright, I get it now.” I smile slightly. “Did you do all of this because of what happened to your family?”
“I don’t want it to happen again.”
“But why are they shut down now?”
“I’m not using this room anymore, Alayna. But you should know that this was the only place I know I’m safe.” His body faces me and cups my face. I can see the agony in his expression. “When you came into my life, I started to view things differently. I want to live a normal life again.”
I lean my face into his hand. “You’re giving me too much credit.”
His thumb brushes my cheek. “Do you still accept me after showing this to you? Do you still accept me for who I am?”
I weakly smile, but my eyes also fail me. Tears rush down my cheeks after the building tension in my chest.
“I do. I do accept you. I like that you’re honest and open with me.”
He let out a soft sob. “Thank you. I was worried you wouldn’t want me anymore after this.”
I chuckle. “I think I received all the shocks a person could handle the first time I met you, but I accept you for who you are. You are a survivor, Brandon. Never forget that.”
We walk back to his room holding each other’s hands, and then we lay next to each other’s side.
I’d never felt contentment like this. Him lying next to me is more than enough. I wish I could be with him every day like this, but I respect that his situation still demands privacy.
I hover my arms around his waist and rest my head on his chest. He holds my hand and brings it to his lips.
“I’m free tomorrow,” he says. “And I want to go somewhere. Do you want to come with me?”
I smile. “To where?”
“My mother has a villa in Portland. Oliver is going to take us there, and of course, I want to be with you.”
“Wow.” I look up at him in surprise. “Can you go out that far now?”
“I think so, but I’m still figuring that out. I want to try,” he murmurs. His eyes are watching my face so intently like I’m some beautiful portrait.
“Of course, I will come.” I tighten my arms around him. “Wherever you like, as long as you’re with me. But I’m still sleeping here tonight.”
He chuckles. “I don’t want you to sleep anywhere else.”
Silence envelopes us for a moment as we relish each other’s presence, hearing only the sounds of our breaths and heartbeats. He feels so warm as always, and his body is so firm. His arms secure me while his other hand is stroking my hair.
He lets me touch the traces of his scar under the thin fabric of his shirt. He feels so incredible, so unreal.
“Are you ever going to tell me what happened to cause this?” I whisper.
“I’ve never been with a woman in this bed before,” he answers differently. I guess he isn’t ready to tell another story. Perhaps showing me the room was all he could manage today.
I roll over so I can look at his face. “Have you fallen in love before?”
The question won’t hurt, right?
He shrugs. “Yes,” he admits, but amused. His answer is followed by a question. “Have you?”
I don’t want to answer his question. It’s complicated. “Tell me about her,” I ask him instead.
“I don’t think you want to hear it.”
“I want to know. It’s normal for the present girlfriend to know about her boyfriend’s past love, right?”
“Girlfriend?”
I throw him a scowl. “Am I not?” I pout.
He kisses my temple. “Of course, you are.”
“So, do you care to tell me?”
“Hmm...”
“Hmm?”
“She’s—she’s a tomboy...” He starts, his eyes brighten up. Guessing from his facial expression, I can tell that it was a good memory. “There’s no feminine side in her gestures. I’ve known her since we were in grade school. We were childhood friends, and her mother was my mom’s best friend.”
“So, she’s close to your family?”
“Yes, my mother liked her.”
“Do you think your mom would like me?”
He laughs softly, and his palm caresses my arm. “You’re a good person and an excellent cook, Alayna. Of course, she would. Any mother would.”
I giggle. “Okay, continue your story.”
“We never dated.” He smirks. It’s a sound of regret, but I let him continue. “She liked me too, but I was a jerk. I dated several girls and even older women, but I never got the chance to tell her my feelings for her.”
“Oh, that was—that was sad.” My heart twitches. “Then what happened?”
“This?” He shrugs. “This happened.”
“Life can be unfair. How old were you when all of this happened?”
“You mean when I started to like her or the, uh...”
“Both.”
“I was fifteen when I became aware of my feelings for her. I didn’t see her since all of this happened to me. I was eighteen.”
“What did she look like? Where is she now, and what’s her name?”
“Too many questions.” He grins. “Hmm, Pauline. She was the prettiest in class, smart, strong—since she held a black belt in jujitsu, and she was quite popular. The last memory I have of her is her short blonde hair and the freckles on her cheeks. I guess she went back to Greece now.”
I suddenly feel envious of Pauline. She sounded like every boy’s dream. What if she suddenly comes back here to see him? Would he still feel the same?
“You broke her heart by leaving her without even telling her. You didn’t give her closure.”
“Would you rather me go back to her? I could look for her if you like,” he jokes, raising an eyebrow.
I glare at him. “You are mine. Don’t ever go back there or even bring her back here.”
“It’s your turn. Tell me about your love story.”
My chest tightens. I always thought I had a complicated relationship—The abusive relationship I’d been through and the nightmares I still haven’t let go of. I have been in tremendous heartache in the past. I’m not sure if I’m ready to tell him those. Or perhaps, I’m afraid of how he’s going to take it.
I don’t know how he’s going to take it.
“What’s important now is you, with me,” I instead say and wrap my arms around him.
“I’ve just shown you my weakness; now I want to hear yours. I want to be close to you.”
“Honestly, unlike yours, nothing is exciting about my life. I know what love is all about, but I couldn’t say I’ve ever really known the feeling.”
“I’m all ears. What more can be surprising than meeting a man who wears a mask?” he jokes.
I snort. “You even make jokes about that. It’s not funny, Brandon. You are more than that. You are strong. You survived all of this, and you are kind, and most of all, compassionate.”
Brandon heaves a sigh and rolls to his side, so he can touch my hair. “I sound like the most perfect man in the universe.” His thumb brushes my lip.
“Because you are.” I gaze into his eyes.
He nuzzles on my temple. “Then if you think that of me... Is there something you’re afraid of? Everybody is afraid of something. At least, that is what I learned from you.” He let out a faint smile.
I hold my breath. “Please don’t be so surprised.”
“Is it very shocking?”
“Promise me.”
“I promise.” He kisses my mouth. “You must know by now what I feel for you.”
“Thanks.” I smile back. “Well... you are quite right. It is very shocking, but this is different. I did fall in love, yes, but I had always been in a no strings attached relationship. Simply, I just don’t give myself too much. It’s a poison for me to give too much. I can’t even believe I’m saying this to you.”
He flinches. “What about us?”
“What about us?”
“Is this also one of your no-strings-attached?”
“We’re not having sex, Brandon. That’s the difference, because... because I thought this could be something real,” I confess. “I’ve never been more willing to try again.”
“You’ve been hurt before, I see.”
“Yes, and because of that, I never opened up about this part of myself. But with you, I’ve broken my every rule.”
“Sounds like I’m not the only one with rules.” His scowl deepens. “You always surprise me; do you know that?”
“I’m sorry. It’s just this... I’m not sure if I can talk about this.” I bury my face in my palms.
My heartbeat hastens, and my chest suddenly feels heavy. How am I supposed to tell him the reasons why I couldn’t? How am I supposed to say that because of the man who ruined me... sexually abused me... that I’ve become so wasted?
“It’s okay if you can’t tell me. I’m sorry I had to ask you.” I feel his body pressed on my back and he touches my shoulder.
I shift my head to his side. I didn’t realize I was crying until the tears were streaming down my face. “I’m sorry.”
He freezes. “Alayna...”
“I’ve always wondered when this day would come.”
Brandon moves close to me and wipes my eyes with his thumb. “You don’t have to tell me if you can’t. Whatever that is.”
I snivel. “I’d just like to be with you tonight.”
“Of course. Come here.”
Brandon envelopes me in his arms and lays me on the bed next to him. He gazes into my eyes as he caresses my cheek.
He isn’t saying anything, and it’s only our breaths I could hear. I run my finger on his mask and wonder what he’s like without it. Then I realize we aren’t so different.
He covers his face with a mask so people won’t see the real him, and I’ve been wearing an invisible one myself when I decided to close off my heart. But slowly, my mask is vanishing because, for the first time, I feel something in my heart that is so special again.
I realize I had fallen asleep when I heard Brandon calling out my name, and when I open my eyes, I see his beautiful half-face in front of me.
“Hey, it’s me. It’s Brandon. Are you okay?”
It takes me a few moments to digest his words. “Why, what’s wrong? Why did you wake me?”
“You’ve been screaming.”
I frown. “I was?”
He nods. “You’re having a bad dream, I guess.”
“Um, what was I saying?” I ask hoarsely. I suddenly feel in need of some water.
“You were crying for help. You sounded like you were in pain. Alayna, what are you dreaming about?”
“I have no idea, but...”
“Yes?”
“I didn’t know I still do that in my sleep,” I mumble, but then I realize I’m not supposed to tell him that. I’d always hidden this part of me since I always thought it wasn’t necessary. I sit up.
Brandon springs up as well. “You’ve had these before too?”
I shove my fingers in my hair. “Yes. My mother is usually the one who deals with it. I’m sorry, Brandon. Maybe I should go back to my room.”
“No, it’s fine.” He wraps his arms around me. “How long have you been alone?”
“What do you mean?”
“When did you move out and leave home?”
“I don’t know if that’s—” I pause. “It’s been a while. Why the question?”
“And the last time you slept with someone?”
My cheeks redden. “What?”
He gazes at me with a scorching blaze in his eyes. “I mean, in the same room.”
I shake my head. “Besides my mother, it’s just you—for a while, at least. I’ve never done this before.” I bite my lip hard, still feeling the pounding in my chest. “Sleeping in someone else’s bed, I mean.”
Brandon releases a heavy breath, and his shoulders relax. “Well, I’m flattered but, whatever this is, if this is constant, this isn’t normal, Alayna.”
I shake my head. “I don’t know what I’ve been dreaming about!”
“Calm down. I’m just saying that maybe something’s wrong and that you should be trying to reach out to an expert,” he advises.
“You see, I told you about this, and you think something’s wrong with me?” I feel my voice tightening.
“You are certainly overreacting. Come on.” He pulls me against him and rubs circles on my back. “It’s not what I meant. Look, who are you talking to? I’ve been battling with my issues so I understand where this is going. All I am saying that maybe you should pay more attention to this because this might not be good for you.”
Suddenly, his touch and the warmth of his body calm my senses. I love how he can be so comforting. “I didn’t know this was still happening to me.”
“No one was there to wake you before, so you couldn’t know,” he concluded.
“I’ve had this when—” I start, “When I was... with my first boyfriend.” I look at his face. I almost couldn’t bear the sincerity of his eyes.
“Go on,” he whispers.
“Not all of us have a nice memory of their first love. I was inexperienced, naïve. I was in love. He was five years older than me.”
The muscle in his jaw ripples. “What did he do to you?”
“He forced me,” I started sobbing.
Brandon shut his eyes, and when he opened them, his expression is cold. He seethes under his breath.
“Are you okay?” I ask.
“I’m fine.” He grunts. “Continue.”
Suddenly, I feel so weak and quivering. My palms are beginning to sweat. I curl myself into one piece. Brandon doesn’t move.
I shake my head firmly. “I really don’t want to talk about it, Brandon.”
“Fuck,” Brandon mutters a curse. “How could you keep this to yourself?”
“I just can’t, okay?” my voice raises. “I really can’t. Please, Brandon.”
This is the last thing I want him to know about me. Not after the devil of my past had become. He could always find me wherever I am. If I ever say anything to anyone, I’ll be in danger...
My devil isn’t just an ordinary person. He’s a senator’s son, and now he’s running for Mayor. I’d be dealing with a hard wall if I open up about him now.
I close my eyes and let my tears fall.
I know where he is. I’ve always known. He moved to Seattle with his father, but before leaving me, he threatened to find me, though I’m not sure still would, but I have to be careful. He’s too dangerous.
Brandon harshly runs his fingers through his hair. “Fine. Can you tell me how it ended?”
“No,” I whisper. I feel like I’m going to be sick.
He set his glass down the bedside table with a harsh thud.
“Then at least tell me his name, and I swear—”
“No! Don’t bother. You don’t have to make your hands dirty for someone like him.” I wrap my arms around his chest and pull him close.
A deep growl vibrates from his chest. “Alayna, what’s his name?”
I shake my head. “No, please. This is the reason I can’t tell anybody, or you... I know that you are powerful enough to deal with someone like him, but that’ll taint your name.”
“I don’t care about my name, Alayna. If that’s what it takes to destroy this person who forced you, are whatever the fuck he did to you. I’d crush him. I swear he’d rather wish he were dead.”
Shivers run through my spine, and I believe he could do it. I don’t know how, but he could. It is in his voice, in his expression. It’s dark.
“Please. I can’t take it if anything happens to you because of that. I’d lose it if something happened to you because of me... There were things I did that I wasn’t proud of because I rebelled against myself. You wouldn’t wish to hear more of it. So please, don’t. It’s not worth it.”
“But you are. You are worth it.” He shifts to my side and cups my face between his palms. He lightly brushes his mouth with mine. “And I love everything about you, however painful your past was. You have accepted everything about me, and so do I.”
And all I thought, he would pity me, or he might take it negatively, but no. I find sincerity and compassion in his eyes. I feel like I could tell him everything, and he would still believe in me and care for me. Now, if I’m going to be afraid of something—it’s losing him.
“I’m excited about our trip tomorrow,” I say, moving on to a new subject. “I can’t wait to be with you like this.”
“Me too, Alayna.”
