Baby showers.

Does one tiny human being really need all that stuff? And here I thought we didn’t get to be that high maintenance until we fit into our first pair of high heels.

Chapter 22

Tanzy’s mouth dropped open as she stepped into what had been Millicent’s formal parlor. She supposed she should have paid more attention to Sue’s excited ramblings the night they’d come to move furniture around. Then the eight-foot Mother Goose and the close-to-life-size Old Woman in a Shoe, complete with shoe, wouldn’t have been such a shock.

Sue linked her arms through Tanzy’s and Riley’s, her eyes sparkling. “Isn’t it amazing?”

“That’s one word for it,” Tanzy murmured, taking in the rest of the details. Three stuffed mice, each with black sunglasses, each about three feet tall, danced on the hearth in front of the stone fireplace. “Let me guess—”

“Three Blind Mice,” Sue finished excitedly. “I had thought the Mother Goose theme would be fun since that’s how Mariel is decorating the nursery. But your great-aunt just took my ideas and ran with them. I’ve told her a hundred times already that this was far more than necessary, but she kept telling me—”

“It’s my pleasure, dear,” Millicent finished herself, as she stepped into the room. “Riley,” she said, greeting him with a smile and pat on the arm. “Brave man, stepping into the world of babies and expectant mothers and the like.”

Riley grinned, darting Tanzy a quick look when her great-aunt presented her cheek.

Tanzy just winked at him, and Riley bestowed the expected kiss, then gracefully and somewhat abashedly accepted a buss on his cheek in return. “Actually,” he said, after clearing his throat, “I’d hoped to use Tanzy’s office for a while.” He patted the carrying case he had over one shoulder. “I’ve brought some work.”

Tanzy knew he’d brought surveillance equipment as well, or whatever he needed to tap into the stuff Millicent already had set up. He wanted to keep an eye on Big Harry’s grounds and the comings and goings of the guests. Tanzy had drawn the line at making this some high-security, supersecret event. It was Mariel’s day and she wasn’t going to let this other mess interfere. Any more than necessary anyway. Big Harry was well secured and Riley would certainly spot anyone out of the ordinary on his monitors. He had the guest list. And his was the only male name on it other than Martin’s, so it shouldn’t be all that hard.

In the meantime, Ernie was putting in some overtime trying to track down Margaret Swingler’s home address. Riley had sworn to Tanzy in bed that morning that he’d have this dealt with and over before the new year. Tanzy was all for that. She wished she felt better about her upcoming faux meeting with Martin, though. Her stomach wouldn’t stop clenching. She kept telling herself the setup was a good thing, that by the time they left here today, Martin would be in the clear and they could focus all their attention on the Swingler woman.

“I’m going up,” Riley whispered in her ear.

“Okay,” she said, suddenly wishing he wasn’t leaving, even just to go upstairs. She felt more than a little uneasy, and who wouldn’t with an eight-foot goose breathing down their neck? But beyond the meeting with Martin, she also knew she’d been thinking about what happened when the case was wrapped up. Her future. Their future. He’d asked her to accompany him to dinner to meet his father and his father’s woman friend, so that was some indication he saw this—them—sticking around together for a bit longer. She stretched up on her toes and kissed him. “I’ll sneak up later, after Martin comes and goes. I’ll bring you whatever I can get him to touch. And if I’m really good, a handwriting sample.”

“Oh, you’re really good,” he said, investing just enough velvet into his tone to make her momentarily forget about everything else. “I can personally vouch for that.”

She grinned, wishing she could do more than kiss him for the confidence his easy tone and grin instilled in her. “Thanks.” She looked over his shoulder at the women beginning to crowd into the foyer, all bearing gifts wrapped in miles of pastel and ribbon. “I’ll probably need a sanity check within the hour anyway,” she murmured.

Riley grinned down at her, kissed her back. “Be brave, grasshopper.”

She stuck her tongue out at him. He was chuckling as he left the room. Tanzy turned back, to find Sue grinning from ear to ear, arms folded as she waited expectantly.

“What?”

“This.” She motioned between Tanzy and the spot where Riley had been standing. “You’re impossibly cute with him. And that’s so unlike you.”

She stuck her tongue out at Sue. It seemed wrong to flip her the bird in front of Mother Goose. “Ha, ha. We’re . . .” She tried to think of some throwaway line, but it was Riley. And Sue was one of her best friends. And she just couldn’t. She blew out a breath. “This isn’t the time or the place. You’ve got women bearing baby gifts descending on this place any second. But I gotta tell you, Sue, this whole relationship thing is a hell of a lot scarier than I thought.”

“I don’t know, you two seem to have fallen right into it like old hats.”

“That’s just it. We have. Is that normal? I mean, what if just when I start to get used to this, something happens, or he changes his mind, or—” She made a disgusted sound. “Listen to me. I sound like a silly teenager in the bathroom at the high school dance, wondering if Johnny really likes me.” She looked back at Sue with big eyes. “But honestly, do you think he does, Susie, huh? Do you? Will he ask me to the prom?”

Sue cracked up laughing, then tugged Tanzy into a hug. “I’m so glad you’ve joined the herd. We’re all going to enjoy this immensely.”

Tanzy scowled, even as she appreciated the hug. “Yeah, I can hardly wait.”

“Maybe before too long we’ll hear wedding bells.” Sue clapped her hands together. “Just think what Millicent and I can do with that shower!”

“Over my dead body,” Tanzy warned. “And if it does ever get that far—and I’m not saying I’ve even thought about it—we’re eloping. I’ve just decided.”

“And deprive the world of watching Tanzy Harrington, perennial lone wolf, tie the knot? Join the herd? Accept what the rest of us have known forever?”

“Which is?”

Sue threw an arm around her shoulders and hugged her. “That love is a wonderful thing, baby.”

Tanzy shook her head. “Thank you, Michael Bolton.”

Sue laughed, but she went on. “All joking aside, it is a wonderful thing. In all its incarnations. It’s easy to say it’s not for you when you’re not in it, until one day you wake up, and wham! Then there it is, staring you in the face. Daring you to say you don’t want it.” She grinned. “And you thought dating was an adventure. Honey, you don’t even know.”

“Well, don’t get ahead of yourself here.”

Sue merely winked at her as, mercifully, the guests began to logjam the foyer. Tanzy helped herself to a glass of punch, wishing like hell they’d planned this thing for a bit later than two in the afternoon. Then the punch could have been spiked.

Rina showed up next, looking almost as uncomfortable as Tanzy. She stuck close, armed with a cookie in one hand and a punch glass in the other. “Did you talk to Sloan?” she asked Rina, as Sue continued to welcome friends and members of Mariel’s family the rest of them had never met. Thank God for Mariel’s mother, or the guest list would have been very small.

“She’ll be here.” Rina sent Tanzy a look. “We talked. At the gallery. After you left.” She shook her head. “I’m still sort of amazed by it all, but power to her, I say.”

Tanzy raised her punch glass. “To getting rubbed the right way.”

Rina gave her a look, then both of them snickered and clinked glasses.

“Get a load of that one,” Rina said with a nod. She pointed her glass in the general direction of a woman who’d just entered the room wearing a wide-brimmed, rose-adorned hat. “That’s almost as hideous as those mice.”

Tanzy swallowed a laugh. “Now, now. I’m sure she thinks she’s the height of fashion.”

“Circa 1932 maybe. I wonder which side of the family she’s from. Hopefully not Mariel’s.”

“Well, we can’t pick our relatives.” Tanzy made a face. “I should know.”

Sue came in just then and clapped her hands. “Okay, everyone, places. Her car just pulled up.”

Rina and Tanzy exchanged looks. “She missed her calling.”

“Broadway?” Rina murmured.

“No,” Tanzy interjected as they joined the rest of the group. “Dictator of Disney World.”

“Shhh,” Rina said, giggling, as Sue shushed them all, sending a fierce glance their way.

Tanzy and Rina made a silent show of locking up their lips and throwing away the key.

Sue merely rolled her eyes and went back to the foyer.

“Where’s Tanzy? Are Rina and Sloan coming?” they heard Mariel ask as she came in. “I’m sorry I couldn’t make it to the gallery last night. The baby’s taken up Tae Bo or something and my ribs feel like a well-used set of bongo drums.”

“Millicent set up tea in the formal parlor,” Sue was saying.

“It was really nice of you guys to do this for me. You didn’t have to, you know. I appreciate it. I really didn’t want any fuss, so it’s nice knowing it’s just going to be the four of—”

“SURPRISE!”

Everyone stepped forward as one when Sue and Mariel came into the room. Mariel squealed, then grabbed her belly, and Tanzy was certain they’d shocked her right into labor. She ran forward, put her arm around her, with Sue on the other side. “We wanted it to be a surprise, but I swear if you have the baby right here in front of me, I won’t be held responsible for my actions,” Tanzy told her.

Mariel just looked up, tears of joy in her eyes. “Oh my God. I can’t believe you guys did this!”

Tanzy exchanged looks with Sue. She’d said all along that with as much as Mariel loved being the center of attention, there was no such thing as overkill. “You da man,” Tanzy whispered to Sue, who smiled smugly. To Mariel, she said, “You owe this all to Sue.”

“And Tanzy’s aunt Millicent,” Sue interjected. “She took my ideas, and well—” They stepped back so Mariel could enter Mother Goose Land.

Mariel gasped, then cried, “It’s . . . it’s just wonderful.”

After Rina hugged her, the two of them retreated to their place by the mice and watched Sue lead Mariel through the throng so she could accept hugs and cry more tears as she greeted her other friends and family.

Sloan scooted in, unnoticed, and took Tanzy’s punch glass by way of hello. After downing the contents, she smiled and said, “Did I miss much?” Only then did she notice the décor. “Oh. My. God.”

“Pretty much sums it up,” Tanzy agreed. “Memo to self: Never underestimate the combined power of Sue and Millicent. It could get scary if they joined forces on a regular basis.”

Sloan’s still wide-eyed gaze wandered the room. “Yeah,” she breathed. “They might rule the world.”

“But at least it would be color coordinated and have a theme,” Rina put in.

“Maybe we should send them to the Middle East,” Sloan added.

Laughing, Tanzy nudged Sloan in the ribs. “You’re looking pretty perky. Cheeks flushed, eyes sparkling. Let me guess, it wasn’t some big account that made you late.”

“Let’s just say it was some big thing and leave it at that.”

Tanzy would have choked on her punch, had Sloan not already downed it. “Hey, those are my lines.”

“Yeah, well, one of us has to be a last bridesmaid, apparently.” She grinned and scanned Tanzy from head to toe. “And, judging from your flushed cheeks and sparkling eyes, I’m guessing it’s my turn.”

Rina and Tanzy hugged her. Despite how happy she seemed, divorce was never easy. “We’re all here for you, you know.”

Rina was watching as Sue seated Mariel beneath a beach-size frilly umbrella that hung from the vaulted ceiling and said, “Maybe we can get Millicent and Sue to throw you a happily divorced party.”

Tanzy shot her a look, but Sloan actually laughed. “Do you think if I mention I want strippers, they’ll be this inventive?”

Rina and Tanzy both laughed with her. “That could be worth the risk,” Tanzy said.

Then someone cleared his throat behind her. She turned to find Martin standing there, eyes still a bit glazed in shock as he took in the room.

Rina and Sloan looked at her questioningly, but Tanzy mouthed, “I’ll explain later,” and quickly escorted Martin to the front parlor, which she and Riley had agreed would be the meeting location.

“I’m so sorry to drag you out here on a weekend.” She tried hard not to sound nervous, and yet she had to clasp her hands together to keep them from shaking. It was ridiculous really. He was her boss. Her friend. And it took every bit of willpower she possessed to keep from blurting out, “Are you obsessively in love with me?” Just the fact that she’d thought it should make her want to laugh hysterically. Instead she felt like she was going to puke.

“I had no idea,” he was saying, smiling at her, also looking somewhat nervous. “About the party, I mean. I feel like I’m intruding.”

Were those the words of a man who’d been stalking her? She didn’t think so. Or didn’t want to think so.

“Trust me, with all the hoopla going on in there, I’ll never be missed.” Probably not the thing to mention to a potential stalker.

“Wow,” he said upon entering the parlor. “I see your aunt believes in leaving no room undecorated.” He wandered into the room, looking at the various ornaments, pausing beneath the giant chandelier.

Tanzy thought about the first time she’d stood there, the moment she’d first met Riley. She knew he was watching them, right this very second. She cleared her throat. She and Riley had agreed on this course of action, but putting it into motion was a lot harder than she’d thought it would be. “I, uh, I have some papers I want you to look at.” The plan was to show him the SoulM8 emails, explain her concerns, without necessarily coming right out and asking him directly if he was behind the emails. She—and Riley—would monitor his reaction. And, at the very least, get his fingerprints on the documents.

“Oh?” He glanced at her, must have seen something in her expression, because his shoulders slumped and he let out a long sigh. “Oh,” he repeated, this time with great resignation. “I knew it.”

Tanzy’s heart plummeted. Dear God, could it really be? He’d probably suspected the jig was up when she invited him here. That explained his nervousness. She should have been freaked out by the quasi-admission, but looking at the bleak expression on his face, all she could feel was sad. Immeasurably sad. For both of them. “Martin, really, you had to know that I’d—”

“Yeah, yeah,” he interrupted, still not looking at her. “I saw it coming. I—I just didn’t want to believe it.” He scrubbed a hand over his face. “It sounds crazy, because I know this is business, not personal. But . . . well, I guess I always felt like we were more than merely business associates. That we’d be together for the long haul.”

“Oh, Martin.” Tanzy wanted to cry. How had this happened? When had this happened? But he looked so forlorn, she couldn’t bring herself to torture him with a barrage of questions. Yes, she’d been victimized by him, but it was clear now that, from his perspective, they’d been harmless love letters. Oh, Martin. If only she’d confronted him sooner they could have both saved themselves a great deal of anguish.

“Listen, I know this is hard—”

He laughed, though there was no humor in it. “So what else is new?” He sighed again. “When your column took off, I admit I got a little excited. I guess I needed to feel . . . needed. My life has been—well, you don’t need to hear about that. The thing is, I let my own selfish needs blind me.”

“You’re going through a rough time,” Tanzy told him. “We all have them.”

Just then Rina poked her head in. “I’m really, really sorry to interrupt, but the punch bowl is empty, the food is disappearing, and Sue is hip deep in diaper pails and baby blankets. You said no caterer, so can you direct me to where the rest of the stuff is?”

Tanzy looked at Rina, then at Martin, who waved his hand. “Go, go. Please. I feel guilty enough as it is. We can finish all this up later.”

“Are you sure?” She glanced at Rina, who was looking more than a little overwhelmed, and said, “I’ll be out in a minute, just go hold the fort down.” She looked back at Martin, who nodded.

“Please,” he said.

“Okay.” She sighed then, unable to believe it was all over. And so simply. She looked at Martin, who looked miserable. Okay, not so simply. Not for him. “Why don’t you at least stay long enough to grab a bite to eat, maybe look around a little. I know you’ve mentioned before you always wanted to see Big Harry. I wish I had time for a guided tour—”

He shook his head. “No, I understand. And . . . well, I want to thank you. For being strong enough to do this face-to-face. You’re a class act. Always have been.”

Tanzy smiled, felt like she was going to cry. “Thanks. So have you.” She pointed him in the direction of the party. “Go. Have quiche. It sounds like it’s winding down. Millicent is here. She loves to show off the place, especially at Christmas.”

She foisted him off on Rina, then ducked down the hall, pushing the punch-bowl cart laden with empty food platters to the kitchens for a refill. The reality that it was truly and finally over began to sink in, leaving her feeling almost light-headed, giddy. Mariel, she noted, seemed thrilled with all her booty. Rina had mentioned that Mariel’d been particularly touched by the baby-milestones journaling book Sue had helped Tanzy pick out. Appropriate from a writer, she’d thought. She’d noticed Sue looking over the mountain of baby gifts, cooing and ahhing, as she’d left the room.

“Oh, she’s definitely next,” she murmured, trundling down the hall. Anyone who looked that rapturous over some contraption that cleaned diapers was a total goner. At least it looked like Mariel would have someone to gab baby with, mercifully leaving the rest of them out of it.

God, the kitchen looked like a war zone. Millicent had offered to have the entire event catered and they’d eventually agreed to have the food brought in, but no wait staff. Tanzy hated having to insist on that, but after the charity ball, both she and Riley felt better knowing there was no hired help on the premises, no matter how vetted the caterer was ahead of time. Looking at the kitchens now, with the stalker crisis over and done with, she really wished she’d lightened up on the catering embargo.

“Need a hand?”

Tanzy squealed and jumped about a foot. Hand to her chest, she turned to find Riley lounging in the doorway. “God, you scared ten years off of me.”

“I’m sorry, I thought you heard me.” He took the bowl from her hands and put it on the counter, then drew her into his arms. “You okay?”

“Yeah. I guess you saw and heard everything?”

“Yeah.” He didn’t say anything else, just pulled her against his chest and rubbed her back. “I’m sorry.”

She hadn’t known what to expect from Riley. She should have known it would be compassion. For her, and for Martin. “It’s so sad, really. I think he was just lonely. And one thing led to another and he built up this whole other fantasy in his head. I just wish I’d brought it all out in the open sooner.”

“We didn’t know. And I still think it was better to be cautious.”

She smiled up at him. “Yeah, easy to say now that being cautious ended up landing us in bed together.”

“Well, there is that.” He grinned, then leaned down and kissed her. “I was really proud of how you handled the whole thing.”

She hugged him. “Thanks. I—” She shook her head. “It’s going to be a little weird for a while, but I think we nipped it off in a way that will allow us to salvage our working relationship okay. I just hope he gets some help.”

“Yeah.” Riley looked beyond her to the disaster area that was the kitchen. “You’ll be happy to know I gave Millicent the go-ahead to bring in a cleaning crew when this is over.”

“Does she know? About Martin?”

“I didn’t think this was the right time. Who knows what she’d say to him.”

Tanzy shuddered, glad they’d never included her great-aunt in their little plan. She’d have never been able to pull it off if she thought Millicent was out in the foyer, eavesdropping on the whole thing. Which she assuredly would have been, one way or the other. “True. What did you tell her?”

“I just whispered that the crisis was over and that we’d discuss it later, after the party. She’s off giving Martin the grand tour.”

“Oh, good.” She took a breath, then let it out. “I can’t believe it’s really over.” She looked at the punch cart. “I guess I’d better get out there with more stuff before they start gnawing on the diapers. Who knew a bunch of women could eat and drink so much. Must be all the baby talk. Nesting hormones and eating for two, and all that rot.”

Riley laughed. “It’s not contagious, you know.”

“Tell that to Sue.” Tanzy began arranging food on the empty platters. “Sloan showed up.”

“Yeah, I saw.”

“Right. I forgot. You were upstairs playing Rocket Powers, International Man of Mystery.”

“You’re so amusing.”

She gave him a cheeky grin. “I certainly try.”

He kissed her, and what started out as a brief kiss turned into another, then another. “You sure you don’t want to leave a bit early? I think wrapping this up deserves a celebration. I had something for two in mind.”

“I can’t leave until this is done. Sue would never forgive me. As it is, she’ll want a full explanation of where I was during the gift oohing and ahhing portion of her program. I figure we have another hour at least.” She smacked at his arm when he went to pull her back into his arms. “Stop flirting with the help.”

“Wait till I show off my big muscles and manhandle that full punch bowl onto the cart for you. Gets ’em every time.”

“If you really want to prove your manhood, you’ll roll the cart into the parlor so I can carry these last trays of food out there.”

He didn’t even blink. “Sure thing.”

“I don’t think you understand. A roomful of women? Playing with baby things? Nesting? Cooing? It’s the estrogen ocean in there.”

He just winked. “I’m Rocket Powers, remember? If you get bored or you just need a break from bassinettes and strollers, you know where to find me.” He rolled the cart to the door.

Tanzy pictured the women in the room enjoying watching Riley. She certainly did. He’d make an interesting contrast to all the pinks and blues, geese and mice. “Be brave,” she called after him.

“I’ve managed to face the best defense the NFL can throw at me. I can handle this.”

“Ah, but you underestimate us, grasshopper. Women have a sixth sense about weak spots. And you with that bum knee.” She tsked. “You’ll never stand a chance.”

“You’ll rescue me if necessary?”

She grinned and patted her hip. “I’ve got my estrogen laser gun already set to stun.” She heard him chuckling as he rolled the cart down the hall. Still grinning, she turned back to the trays of food, suddenly feeling a whole lot more settled about the entire thing.

She was actually humming a tune to Jack and Jill, as she arranged the similarly themed salt and pepper shakers on one of the trays, when she heard him come back in.

“If you’re coming back in here to lure me upstairs,” she began, a wicked smile curving her lips, “you just might succeed. Because I was thinking that I could save some of these cherries and—”

“Finally, we’re alone. I’ve waited such a long time for this moment.”

Tanzy started in surprise. It wasn’t Riley behind her. It was just one of the guests. What had she said? Waited such a long time for this—? Oh, she realized a second later. One of the ladies must have recognized her, had probably been waiting for a private moment to ask for an autograph.

She pasted a smile on her face and spun around. And felt her heart stutter. It was the woman with the floppy flower hat. Mariel’s unfortunately frumpy relative. Only looking at her straight on, Tanzy now realized she’d seen her before. And not in Mariel’s family photo album. She’d been thrown off by the dead-brown shade of hair. It had been blond in the employee photo.

“Margaret? Margaret Swingler?”

Her eyes, hidden behind thick-lensed glasses that made even Riley’s sheep frames look stylish, widened slightly. “You’ve known? Known it was me?” She clasped her hands together, a look of almost maniacal rapture lighting her face.

It was the maniacal part Tanzy keyed in on. Oh. My. God.