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DON’T EXPECT LIFE TO BE
EASY OR TROUBLE-FREE

When you ask people whether they expect their life to be easy or trouble-free, almost everyone says, “Of course I don’t expect that.” Yet, interestingly enough, when you pay careful attention to the way people respond to minor adversity, it becomes apparent that, in reality, we often do expect our lives to be easy. Otherwise, we wouldn’t be “sweating it” whenever life wasn’t accommodating us the way we would like it to. We’d be far more accepting of the way things are rather than insisting that things be different or better.

Think about it. We expect and demand that our computer works perfectly every time, without a glitch. Why else would we go crazy and get frustrated on those rare occasions when there is a problem? Same thing with other electronic gadgets and conveniences. We’re fine so long as they work as expected. If not, we’re thrown off balance.

The same can be said about the expectations we often have of other people. For example, we expect others to behave in certain ways—and when they don’t, we become upset. We also expect certain reactions from people—but when we don’t get them, we’re stressed or disappointed. Similarly, we expect things to go a certain way. We’re okay as long as they go as planned. But when they don’t, we lose it.

Years ago, a dear friend of mine asked me a question that, in an instant, changed the way I looked at things. I was complaining about my life and my many troubles and hassles—mostly “small stuff.” He looked me in the eye and said in a sincere tone, “Richard, do you think you should be exempt from the rest of the human race?” He wasn’t being condescending or mean-spirited. He simply wanted me to understand that along with the gift of life comes plenty of hassle, frustration, and difficulty. No one is exempt from this absolute inevitability. There are no exceptions.

I hope you’ll consider this bit of wisdom as well. It’s ironic, but when you remind yourself that life isn’t supposed to be easy or trouble-free, in some strange way, your life begins to seem a bit easier and more trouble-free.