Appendix D
Helping the Child Explore and Plan a Career

“What should I be when I grow up?” Your children’s future careers will affect them as well as you. If you tell your children what to be and they later decide against your wishes, they feel they have disappointed you. If they become what you want but don’t enjoy it, then they resent you. Your responsibility is not to say, “Be a teacher!” or “Be a plumber!,” but rather to give guidance in helping them (1) know themselves, (2) explore and compare careers, and (3) decide a way to reach their goals.

KNOWING THEMSELVES

Insights about your children are clues to career possibilities. Your child may like to tinker with things, pulling them apart, putting them together again, or building something new. Another child may thrive on working out a monthly budget or figuring the square footage of the lawn in preparation to buying fertilizer, and still another child may want to be surrounded by friends every minute—a real conversationalist and social butterfly. A people-oriented person probably would find a job as a research scientist as confining as the data-oriented person would find a job as a hotel manager.

Parents hear children fantasize about what they would like to be. If Johnny, at seven, talks about being a football star, let him enjoy his fantasy even if you see that as a very unlikely role for him. However, at twelve, if he still talks about being a football hero but shows absolutely no promise on the little league football team, you can begin drawing some realism into his dream. Ask, “Why do you think this would be exciting? What else would you like to be, if for some reason you couldn’t be a football player?” Don’t make an issue of what seem to be unrealistic choices, because career decisions don’t need to be made at twelve.

Provide a broad base of experiences. Take your children places and encourage them to join clubs and have hobbies. City recreation departments and community organizations offer varied programs to meet a child’s interests—direct them in these areas. Try to eliminate sex bias in thinking about experiences to provide. If a friend tells your daughter that she can only be a nurse and not a doctor, try to acquaint her with a female doctor or a male nurse. Point out that her desire and ability are more important than her sex. Notice, and give praise for, the school subjects in which your children excel. Teach them that their “job” as students—getting to school on time and completing assignments accurately—is important for a successful career in the future.

Your job as a parent involves helping your child develop a positive attitude about working. One high school counselor said the number one complaint from employers is “Why can’t you teach kids to have a positive attitude?” If, as parents, you see your role as contributing to society, your child will likely pick up that attitude, too.

The opportunities and attitude you provide will help your children build faith in themselves, foster a feeling of worth, and find what really interests them. By the time they are about seventeen they should be in a better position to honestly answer “What do I really enjoy? What life style is for me?”

EXPLORING AND COMPARING CAREERS

If you know yourself, you can better explore and compare careers. When Charlene, a high school junior, could only talk about the excitement of ranch life and horse training as a career, her parents arranged an experience for her on a dude ranch. After feeding, brushing, saddling, and scooping up after the horses all summer, Charlene decide ranch life was not very romantic, and she was ready to look at other career choices. Where can you send your children for guidance? Have them ask people about their jobs, and visit job sites to provide still a broader understanding. Lori was determined to be a nurse, until she visited a small clinic and passed out from the smell of the anesthetic. Many high schools provide career exploration programs that can answer your child’s questions about the employment outlook for the future, suggest some suitable career options for your child’s academic strengths and weaknesses, and give aptitude tests that analyze interests and skills. Of course, these tests won’t tell your child what to be, but they will offer hints and guidance toward possible fields. School counselors can offer job interview tips, suggestions for filling out resumés, and supply current books and magazines about different careers.

Some high schools may not offer career guidance so you are on your own to find help. A good source to begin with is the Occupational Outlook Handbook, published by the U.S. Department of Labor, Bureau of Labor Statistics. It is revised and reissued every two years and copies are available at most libraries. It gives job qualifications, salaries, opportunities for employment, and present trends in thousands of careers.

The Boy Scouts of America offer a career program, Explorer Scouts, for boys and girls between the ages of fourteen and twenty-one. As a parent you can call the Scout office in your community and tell them the career in which your child is interested, from Aviation to Zoology, then the Scout office will steer you to that career group. If a group is not functioning in your area of interest, they will attempt to organize one. These groups usually meet twice a month with a volunteer specialist in the field working with the youth in a wide variety of ways. The philosophy is “Explore today for tomorrow.” One such group in the Denver, Colorado, area, the Veterinarian Explorers, has been functioning for four years. This first-hand contact with professionals can help teens gain knowledge, make valid comparisons to their personal interests, and have a lot of fun.

Another school counselor was quick to say that the parent is the number one teacher of skills relating to the work experience such as writing out a check, preparing an income tax return, and seeing that the child has a social security number. Don’t forget these important details.

DECIDING HOW TO REACH THE GOALS

When the child knows the answer to “What do I want to be?,” the next question is “How do I reach my goal?” First, check out the requirements in the Occupational Handbook or with people in that field, then set about meeting them. School counselors can help again by guiding your child toward the best schools or training options in your city. Perhaps even the school system offers some training in that field. Gary decided his freshman year in high school to be a veterinarian. From that point on, his classes, part-time jobs, and most of his leisure reading focused on that goal. His experiences confirmed his choice, and by age twenty-five he was well-established in his career and doing post-doctoral work. Gary is an unusual case because few children know so early the perfect job fit, however, once the decision is made, efforts should be started to get maximum exposure, as Gary did, to the chosen field. Encourage your children to acquaint themselves with people in that occupation and search for part-time or volunteer work. Career changing is common in our society; few people stay in the same job until retirement. Show understanding if your children go through changes too.

Remember the caution of many career specialists: “A college education is no guarantee of occupational or financial success.” Help your child think about all kinds of educational opportunities, from vocational and trade schools to armed services, junior colleges, and on the job training. Sadly, many college graduates experience unemployment and settle for work completely unrelated to their chosen profession. One enterprising young man took computer science at a technical center and did welding on the side, a skill he learned in high school. His welding business was successful enough to finance his continued schooling and completion of a computer science degree at a university. Encourage your children to think about two career choices—one that is practical and marketable and another career they really want to follow. This way the young adult may be worth twice as much on the job market.

Your child can investigate getting scholarship money and student loans. Such information can be obtained from high school counseling offices and colleges. Millions of dollars in scholarships and grants go unused every year because no one applies for the money. Not only do universities offer money, but also government, industry, fraternal, and other community groups award scholarships. Student loans from colleges are usually offered at lower interest rates and provide payment plans following graduation.

Above all, be a sounding board for questions, concerns, and anxieties. The confidence you have helped build in your child by nurturing independence and by teaching home management skills will carry over at this critical time too.