Jase’s mind skidded, trying to organize and control the conflicting emotions and sensations flooding through him. Aisha’s hand in his, smooth and cold—a perfect companion for his always-running-hot body temperature. Would the rest of her feel cool to his touch too? Well, the soaked part of her definitely—he quelled the thought, hoping his face didn’t reveal where his thoughts immediately ran at this smallest bit of physical contact.
Her cartoon-worthy fall and splash had made him laugh, and for a second her face registered annoyance. But the minute he gripped her hand, her expression changed. Now she was biting her lip, looking up at him, and he was hit with the kind of surging desire that made rational thought difficult. He wasn’t a kid anymore, so it wasn’t impossible to control, but it was . . . surprising. And uncomfortable. And . . . awesome. It had been a long time since he’d felt anything like this, this sense of possibility. This rush of pure physical want. This welcome awareness that it was mutual.
Aisha dropped his hand like it burned her, and that made sense to Jase. He felt like he’d been branded.
They inhaled sharply at the exact same time, then simultaneously jammed their hands into their jacket pockets, and turned away from each other. Anyone watching would know something was up with them, but not what exactly.
Join the club, Jase thought.
They didn’t exchange another word until they were at Aisha’s door. Jase was suddenly uneasy. He’d made her uncomfortable. Maybe she would change her mind about feeding him lunch.
But Aisha smiled up at him and inclined her head toward the door in obvious invitation. “Pumpkin or tomato?”
Jase had read about pumpkin soup, but it wasn’t something his circle of acquaintances ever cooked up. “I’d love to try pumpkin,” he said.
Aisha’s beautiful eyes crinkled, and Jase was lost. “My favorite.”
My favorite, thought Jase.
Minnow cabin smelled like what Jase imagined Aisha’s skin would if he pressed his lips to it, the lightest essence of patchouli, cedar and coffee. Sexy, earthy, hot.
“What?” she asked and Jase, afraid his face revealed his hunger, pretended not to hear. He wanted to study everything in the snug, unpretentious room that was so uniquely Aisha. The first thing that grabbed him was a large collection of rocks—quite nondescript ones, actually, which made him smile for some reason—and equally plain scraps of wood and branches on the large picture window’s wide cedar sill.
“Mo’s,” Aisha said from behind him, a smile in her voice.
He turned. “Sorry, what?”
“The ‘most precious treasures’ collection.” Aisha motioned at the pile closest to him. “Friends of ours, Gray and Mia, collect interesting things while they walk, much to Mo’s fascination. She latched onto the idea and now there’s not an unloved bit of gravel or plain-as-dirt stone around the place. Every one’s a priceless treasure. I finally had to make a rule that in order to add a new one, she has to part with an old one.”
Jase chuckled. He’d seen and heard enough of Mo in action at the dining hall to know she’d resist that.
Aisha nodded like he’d spoken his thoughts out loud. “You laugh, but I’m a serious cramp in her style. Sometimes there are actual tears—not real ones. Just ones to make Mom feel bad.”
Jase laughed again. “How old were you when you had her?”
Aisha’s jaw tightened—almost imperceptibly. If he wasn’t always studying her so intently, he might not have even noticed. “Seventeen, but it didn’t keep me from graduating from high school. With honors.”
The response came instantly to his mind, heavy and hard to contain. I have a ten-year-old daughter, he desperately wanted to reply, but I never see her. I really admire you. You’re amazing. He didn’t let himself say any of that, of course. He was shocked and alarmed he even wanted to. He kept his jagged-edge fatherhood status well-buried and tried to avoid thinking of it directly, let alone sharing it.
“Cool,” he said eventually. “I didn’t graduate from high school, but I read everything I can get my hands on.”
Aisha looked at him oddly. Did she think less of him because of the school thing? “I’m going to get out of my wet clothes, and then I’ll put the soup on. Will you watch it for me so I can go grab Mo? I’m calling it quits for the day.”
The rain was falling in sheets beyond the big window, so Jase understood the decision, but was still unreasonably disappointed. At least he still had lunch to look forward to. He’d focus on enjoying that. “Sure—and yeah, makes sense.”
Aisha disappeared through an arched door off the kitchen. Jase sat on the floor to stretch out his back and tried not to think of her stripping down to skin just beyond the wall closest to him.
She reappeared a second later in nothing but an oversized gray sweater that hung almost to her knees. Her bare legs and feet were bright pink. “The leggings I want are in the dryer.” She caught him looking at her legs and lifted one, waggling her foot. “I am freeeez-ing.”
Minnow, as its name suggested, was a very small space and her foot was right there. Jase caught it without thinking. “It’s like ice,” he agreed. He was about to release her, but the heat in her eyes stopped him.
“Your hands are so warm,” she said breathlessly.
Resting her foot on his outstretched leg, Jase smoothed his hand over her cold skin, rubbing her calf and shin, then her knee and thigh. Her flesh started to warm with his heat. All the while, her eyes were locked on his. She didn’t stop him, and she was biting her lower lip in that familiar, sexy way of hers.
Jase was sure he would’ve stopped before he got much higher. Or he hoped he would’ve. If they were going to start something, this wasn’t how he wanted it to begin—though, on second thought, he could think of worse ways.
A loud rap on the door, followed immediately by the rattle of a latch and the turning of the doorknob almost stopped Jase’s heart. He practically shoved Aisha’s leg away, then bolted to his feet. She, equally startled, leapt back from him as if scalded.
“Mom!” Mo exploded into the room, then stopped and stared at Jase, open mouthed.
Sam entered on Mo’s heels, but walking slightly backwards, holding the door with her skinny butt and maneuvering inside with a large box in her arms, speaking over her shoulder as she did. “I thought you might be taking a break on account of the rain and—” She turned, caught sight of Jase, and almost dropped the box. She didn’t stare quite so literally gape-mouthed as Mo, but close.
Jase saw the room, saw Aisha, as if he were removed from the scene and knew how it looked. Her, half dressed, rosy-skinned, hair damp, like she’d just come out of the shower. Him—a big awkward dope, definitely looking guilty of something because he felt guilty.
Sam looked at Aisha, looked at Jase, then looked back at Aisha. She was obviously thinking something, but her face gave no clue as to what.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t realize you had company.”
Mo pinned her mom with a bossily inquisitive look—an expression Jase didn’t know existed until seeing it on her. “Why is the man who eats so much in our house?”
Unlike Jase, Aisha was, thankfully, capable of not being a complete dimwit in social situations. “Funnily enough, he’s here to eat lunch, Mo-Mo. Your grandma is right. We got rained out.” She glanced at Sam who rested the big box she was carrying down on the small two-person dining table. “Good timing. I was going to put soup on, then come to grab her. What’s that?”
“A bunch of junk I thought you’d love.”
“Ooooh, very intriguing!” Aisha seemed genuinely thrilled, which made Jase wonder what their idea of junk was.
“Do you need me this afternoon? I’m available till you name it.”
Aisha rested her palm on Mo’s crown of curls. “I’m actually taking the rest of the day off, and tomorrow too. Me and the monkey have serious play plans.”
“Goody!”
“Do you want company?”
“No, we’re good. Thanks though.”
Sam nodded and Jase saw a flicker of something he thought he recognized in her face. Before he could nail down what it was, however, her smooth, give-nothing-away smile was back in place.
Aisha had been looking at the box, now she glanced back at Sam. “Dad flew out to that writing conference in Florida yesterday?”
Sam nodded.
“When does he get back again?”
“Not for a month! He’s doing the con, then having some down time, then meeting with some writing friends, then presenting at a retreat. I was thinking of flying to join him, but I know it’s a busy time for you. I want to be available, in case you need me.”
“Oh, don’t postpone on my behalf. I can figure out other childcare, no problem. I don’t want to put you out.”
This time, the flicker was more pronounced. Sadness, Jase thought. No, that wasn’t quite right. Longing. He thought about his first impressions of Sam and Aisha—well, of the whole family, actually—watching them in the dining hall, hearing them discuss various bits of work and personal life. He’d viewed them as this perfectly in sync unit and been struck by how much he’d missed. Now that he knew Aisha’s story, though—or a tiny part of it anyway—the gulf between her and her biological mom was crystal clear.
“You could never put me out,” Sam said brightly, “but I’ll let you know what I decide in the next few days.” She kissed Mo and Mo put her through a complicated “secret” handshake that Jase was pretty sure she was making up as she went along.
When the door closed behind Sam, Aisha took a deep breath and put her hands on her hips. “Okay, let’s get this party started, shall we?”
“Yay!” cheered Mo.
Jase wasn’t sure how pumpkin soup would equal “party,” but he was almost as excited as Mo to find out.
And he wasn’t disappointed. Lunch did seem like a party. The soup was delicious, though he wasn’t sure how he’d describe what it tasted like if someone asked him, and Aisha served it with generously buttered rye toast and slabs of soft mellow cheese. “This is amazing,” was all he could say.
Aisha shrugged off the compliment. “You like everything when it comes to food.”
“I guess that’s true. What can I say? Food is good.” He was about to try to add a specific compliment about this meal being particularly good, however, but Mo jumped into the conversation, apparently approving of where it was going.
“Food is good,” she confirmed. “Can we have popcorn for dessert?”
“Absolutely.”
Aisha was good to her word. After they lingered over their soup—Jase had thirds feeling self-conscious, but Aisha forced him to and wouldn’t take no for an answer—and while Mo kept them amused with non-stop chatter about her morning and her plans for rest of the day, Aisha made the largest stainless steel bowl of popcorn Jase had ever seen.
Reluctantly, he said he should probably head out.
“But you can’t miss popcorn!” Mo insisted. “Pleeeeeasssse stay. And we’re going to listen to Junie B Jones or watch a movie or play a game or maybe all three.”
Aisha shook her head, but when she looked at Jase, her eyes were full of laughter. “Yeah, what Mo said. Pleeeeassse.”
Jase laughed. “Well, if you’re sure I’m not in your way—”
“We’re sure!”
Aisha nodded and Jase laughed again. He wanted to say he was flattered, but the words caught in his throat. What he really felt was . . . gratitude and something else he couldn’t quite identify, but strangely made him think of the shadow he’d seen flicker in Sam’s eyes.
“It is a nice afternoon to curl up with a show, but the TV’s in my room. . . . That won’t be weird for you, will it?”
“Not at all.”
Jase felt that flattered thing again when minutes later Mo insisted on sitting in between him and Aisha on the bed, not just with her mother. “Now you both get to sit beside me!”
“Lucky us,” Aisha said. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.”
“Are you the biggest man you’ve ever seen?” Mo asked Jase randomly, a second later.
Aisha choked on the mouthful of juice she’d just sipped.
Jase looked at her, then at Mo. “Um, I don’t really know? I’m not sure?”
Mo raised her eyebrows and widened her eyes, apparently scandalized by his inability to give a concrete answer about such an important topic. “Well,” she said firmly, “you’re the biggest man I have ever seen. For real.”
“Excellent,” said Aisha. “I’m glad we got that nailed down.”
To Jase’s surprise, the movie was on VHS tape. Aisha’s TV was tiny and had a built-in VHS player. Jase bet it was older than her and weighed almost as much.
“That’s cool,” Jase said, indicating their setup.
“Right?” Aisha leaned over the edge of her bed, pulled open a big drawer hidden by her quilt, and revealed a huge array of Disney movies. “My dad collected old videos for me when I was a kid. Awesome, hey?”
Mo chose “Oliver and Company” and Jase watched it, as enraptured by the storyline as she was—although she was obviously familiar with it because she sang along with every song, word for word.
The popcorn was salty and buttery and delicious, Aisha’s bed was a nest of pillows and super soft quilts that looked homemade, and every so often Aisha caught his eye over Mo’s head and smiled. After the movie, they played go fish and built domino towers.
It was an achingly perfect afternoon, and Jase knew it was destined to be a memory he pulled out on low days, to remind himself there was good in the world and that he was occasionally lucky enough to be a part of it. It also made him think of Emily, and complicated, confusing grief throbbed through him. He prayed this kind of day, its cozy family togetherness and low-key good fun, was her norm.
“Are you okay?” Aisha asked and he realized he’d accidentally gone quiet.
“Yeah, I’m good. Really good, in fact. Just thinking how nice this is.”
Aisha gave him a considering look, then smiled. “It really is, isn’t it?” She patted his arm and his heart revved.
All too soon it was dark outside, and Aisha wondered aloud if she should start something for dinner for them.
For them. Jase liked the sound of that so much—but then a stone landed in his gut and squashed the happy feeling. It was dark, that meant it was, what, after six? He’d totally forgotten about Callum.
“I’ve got to go,” he muttered and bolted to his feet.
“It’s fine, honestly. It won’t be much, but—”
“No.” Jase shook his head. “I mean, I’d love to stay but I forgot that Callum wanted to talk to me. He’s going to think I blew him off.”
“He won’t. It’ll be fine.”
Jase was nowhere near as certain as Aisha was, but that was another of the things he liked about her. She was so optimistic and sure that things mostly worked out. Life hadn’t jaded her or made her resigned yet.
“Fine, go—but you have to promise me a rain check on dinner. Pun intended.”
Rain check. He wished hard that he’d be able to keep that promise, but his gut warned otherwise. Callum and Jo were happy with what he’d gotten done. Needing to have a private chat could only mean one thing. The inevitable. That his services were no longer needed. That his temporary job was even more temporary than he’d thought.
Aisha’s hand on his forearm made him jerk his eyes to her.
“Don’t worry,” she said softly.
“I’m not—”
She arched a skeptical eyebrow. “Callum’s a good guy. Whatever he wants, it’s not bad news.”
Jase wondered what the heck his face had been saying that he hadn’t meant it to. He worried all the way to the office. As much as he was dreading what Callum had to say, he was feeling even worse about breaking the news to Aisha. She really didn’t seem to get that he was the kind of person people always considered expendable.