I stared out the large window at Libations by R, watching the cars drive by as I waited for Juliette and her sister. Since I was early, I used the time to reflect on my past. At some point in my life, I became hyper aware of my surroundings. Constantly noting danger and strange occurrences as if I were cataloging the things in my life for a reality TV show. If I was honest with myself—hell, if I had even finished the self-help book I’d bought instead of returning it—I would know, no, more like confirm, that this hyperawareness was a result of the trauma inflicted on me when I was a child.
Pain and hurt were a constant in my life. So much so they were now like old friends, sticking around reminding me that I could never truly be happy. The need to fill the holes I had sensed inside myself led me down paths I wouldn’t normally have taken—into bedrooms I should never have entered.
The book could have also explained why I craved danger. When I walked down the hospital hall last night, something kept trying to tell me to run. The adrenaline pumping through my veins, my heart pounding in my chest, and the hairs rising on my skin—all these warnings were sounding the alarm. But I pushed forward. I’d felt Logan in the corner of the room, even subconsciously made note of his presence. Yet, I stood there, wrapped up in the thrill running through my body, waiting to see what would happen.
I flipped open the magazine Hathor told me would help me find my purpose and turned to the quiz. The first question made me groan.
Circle all the traits that describe you.
None of mine were listed, so I shut the magazine and took a sip of my coffee. Was there even caffeine in it?
Rosalind walked over and sat down across from me. “You look troubled. Care to unload?” She took a sip of her tea and looked around the coffee shop.
“What would you say my purpose was?” I asked.
She glanced at the coffee cup in front of me. “Judging from the amount of coffee you’ve already had, I’d say you either needed to get some sleep or go pee.”
“I’d say you’re right. That about sums up my life right now.”
“You also need to fix your hair.”
I nodded. “Yes, that too. Should I sleep or pee before I fix my hair, though?”
She laughed. I’d always loved her infectious laughter. It sounded like she pulled it directly from her happy place. “On second thought,” she started, “I’d say your hair looks nice. The wildness really brings out your eyes.” She leaned back in the seat. “I was always jealous of you four in high school. You were all so sure of yourself. So free. I was a nerd.”
“Rosalind, you still are a nerd. With a frou-frou coffee shop in the middle of a seedy neighborhood known for its eclectic nightlife.”
She smiled. “Life does have a way of putting you in your place. Maybe my purpose was to open a coffee shop.” A man walked in, and Rosalind focused on him. “Herbal tea with lemon and an oatmeal cookie.” She shook her head and turned back to me. “Remember when you four went on that ghost hunting expedition?”
I grinned, recalling Kara, Steve, Marta, and me being fascinated with the existence of ghosts ever since the Islia Sea—a luxury yacht that was found abandoned floating off the coast of Tulare in the Atlantic Sea—had been found. Hell, the whole island had been. We even went on a ghost hunting expedition that resulted in our getting banned from the boat for life. We never did prove the existence of ghosts.
“My friends and I had gone, too. We saw the guy throw you all out.”
I turned my coffee mug around as old memories came back. The expedition had been Steve’s quest. One of his many, what we called, nerdy ideas. I smiled at the memory. “That was embarrassing.”
Rosalind gave me a sad smile and reached across the table to touch my hand. “I always thought you and Steve would end up together.”
I leaned back in my seat, trying to get away from the discomfort suddenly overtaking me. Rosalind, as if sensing my discomfort, pulled her hand away and continued, “Anyway, it was that day my first story idea came to me.”
I furrowed my brow in confusion as I tried to remember her first novel. Was it about ghosts? I could have sworn she wrote romance novels.
“Oh…” She laughed. “It wasn’t about ghosts or anything. But it was about first love.” She paused, staring at me, as if she were willing me to understand. After a short while, I nodded. She was talking about Steve and me.
“You are aware that you can read minds, right?” I asked, changing the subject.
Rosalind polished off the rest of her tea and stared at the customers. The look on her face made me think she was searching for something. Like most people who looked inside themselves, gaining perspective from their own endless life lessons and experiences. “The people who come here make the best characters,” she said finally. “The man in the corner…” She dipped her head in his direction. “Last night, he entertained two women and three men in the alley. Today, he’s going to work at the bank.” She turned to me. “I always knew I had some magick. But your friend, the one who was sitting with you the other day, called me a mage.” She shrugged. “I looked it up.”
“Does it scare you?”
She smiled, shaking her head. “Not at all.” She leaned in. “But please don’t tell anyone. I would lose my source material.”
She slapped the table, her entire face lighting up. “I sold another story.”
“Oh, that’s great! What’s it about?” Despite her reassurances, I thought learning she was a mage did disturb her.
“You know I don’t discuss that. But I will give you a signed copy.”
I should have remembered Rosalind didn’t discuss her stories. “Speaking of mind reading,” I said carefully, “the other girl who came in. The one whose thoughts were not her own.”
She nodded slowly. “Yes, the one who wanted herbal tea. I think he was confused what to order.”
I lifted a brow in confusion. “You mean she?”
“No, the one controlling her. He didn’t know what to order.” She looked off, this time as if she were searching for a memory. Her face scrunched up in concentration. Finally, she shook her head like she was dismissing something. “That was the impression I got. A distinctive male voice inside her head.”
It had to be an Old One—possibly the same one controlling Karl. But why would he be inside Juliette’s head?
She frowned, staring at me the way she did when she was trying to figure out my order. “Your purpose. I got it now.” She leaned in. “And so do you. Finish the quiz and check out the ads.” She got up before I could respond.
Well, that wasn’t cryptic at all. And now, that made two people who encouraged me to take a self-help quiz. I was so damn screwed.
My phone buzzed, and I glanced down at the display. It was a text from Jonah, telling me Juliette and her sister were walking up the sidewalk. I shoved the magazine in my purse and switched seats so Juliette wouldn’t spot Jonah sitting in his car outside. Our plan was to follow her when she left. Like Devlin said, we needed answers, and I seriously doubted she would willingly give them to me.
Juliette walked in a few minutes later with her sister Bridgette in tow. They both stopped at the counter and let Rosalind decide on their drinks. This time, Rosalind guessed on the first try. Interesting.
They came to the table carrying two fancy coffees and muffins. They both wore jean shorts and tank tops. While Juliette had her hair down, Bridgette had her dark brown hair in two braids. They regarded me out of similar green eyes.
“Thank you for meeting us,” Juliette said. She looked at her sister. The girl seemed to shrink back into herself. “You remember Bridgette?” She elbowed her sister. “Say hello,” she whispered as if she were speaking to a toddler.
“Hello,” Bridgette said, her voice soft.
They both took a seat and set their coffees in front of them.
“I almost didn’t come,” I said in lieu of saying hello. “You failed to give me all the details about the gathering you invited me to.” I didn’t keep the chastisement out of my voice.
Juliette frowned. “I apologize for that. I honestly believed you knew what went on. I mean, you came to the church and all.”
I didn’t know how to respond to that. We did come to the church, but even a blind man could see I hadn’t wanted to be there. “I heard about some of the charitable activities and wanted to check them out for myself,” I said, stumbling my way through.
She gave me a skeptical look. “The church doesn’t do much charity. Only The Daughters of the Vine.”
I made a noncommittal noise. I needed to move this along. “Why did you want to talk to me?”
She hesitated for a minute and then said, “I wanted to ask for your help.” She held up her hand. “I know that’s awkward. But…you managed to keep Gavina out of your head. Can you tell me how you did it?”
“I thought you said she’d stop whispering to you all?” It was my turn to give her a skeptical look.
She looked down, playing with her muffin.
“Tell her,” Bridgette said, nudging her.
Tears cascading down Juliette’s cheeks. She swiped them away and sat up straighter. “Our parents died two years ago,” she said as if in answer to a question. “We didn’t have anyone to take us in on Tulare.” She paused, eyes imploring mine. I nodded and she continued. “We have an uncle in California, but we didn’t want to leave the island, so we lied to family services and said there was no other family. They said we’d have to go into the foster system.” She looked out the window. “I went to school with Xavier. He always had a crush on me.” She laughed. “But I told him I wasn’t interested.”
“How did he take that?” I asked, thinking about his Instagram account.
She smiled. “Not well. But he got over it. Especially when he found out what happened to our parents.”
Didn’t seem like something Xavier would be broken up over. More likely, he saw an opportunity to try and use her grief as a way to win her over.
“He talked to his mom about our situation. He told me she was worried and offered to take us in.”
I was at a loss for words. A few nights ago, I witnessed her having sex with Gavina. How did she go from being taken in by the woman to sleeping with her? “Did she take advantage of you?” I asked, anger lacing my words.
She shook her head vehemently. “No. No, nothing like that.” Her eyes rounded. “Oh. You saw us having sex at the gathering?”
I nodded slowly, searching her face for any sign of discomfort. There wasn’t any. She had been willing to sleep with Gavina.
She smiled. “She asked me if I wanted to join her group when I turned eighteen. I told her yes.” She closed her eyes, her mouth slowly turned up in a smile. “I love all that energy we share. It’s unbelievable.” She opened her eyes and focused on me. “Monique said you stopped by the other day.” She leaned forward. “She has a bit of a crush on you.”
“Yeah, I wanted to talk to Gavina about what happened the night before.”
“You didn’t like it?” Juliette asked, surprised.
I shook my head and signaled for her to continue. This wasn’t about me. And the only person I was going to confront about what went on the other night would be Gavina.
“Okay. Yes.” She sucked in a breath. “Well, Monique also said she told you about some of the girls leaving.” She glanced at her sister. “Gavina asked Bridgette if she wanted to join.”
I turned to Bridgette. “How old are you?”
“Seventeen,” she said. “I’ll be eighteen in two weeks.”
“Why did she ask Bridgette to join before she turned eighteen?” I asked, my anger once again rising. Something was seriously off here.
“Because more girls have left. The ritual only works if there are thirteen of us.”
“And you don’t want to join?” I asked Bridgette.
She shook her head no.
“Why can’t she just say no? Why do you need to find a way to keep Gavina out of…” I trailed off. Now I got it. “She’s been whispering to you,” I said to Bridgette.
She glanced at her sister and then said, “Yes. For a few days now. Her pull is so strong. But I don’t want to be a part of that.”
“Did you tell her that?”
“She took us in,” Juliette said. “We can’t just say no.”
“Yes the fuck you can,” I said, my voice rising.
“No. I mean.” Juliette blew out a noisy breath. “Not that. She won’t push. It’s just, we feel like we owe her. She kept us out of the foster system.”
“Doesn’t give her the right to take advantage of you.”
“I know. We just thought if Bridgette could learn to keep her out, things would be fine. I like the gatherings. I even told her I would invite more women.”
“And what did she say?”
“She was okay with it. But if we can’t find enough girls…” She shook her head. “Can you please just show us how you did it? We both have magick. We can learn.”
I splayed my hands on the table. “I can’t tell you how I did it. I’m still learning myself.” I leaned forward. “But I can help you find another place to stay.”
“No. It’s fine. I’m sorry we…we bothered you.” She stood up; her sister did too. “Thank you for at least listening.” She stared down at me. “Again, I’m sorry if you were uncomfortable at the gathering.”
They walked away before I could respond. Well, that didn’t go as planned.
After saying goodbye to Rosalind, I went out the back entrance and climbed into Jonah’s car.
“How did it go?” he asked, pulling away from the curb. They had gotten in a car a few spaces down.
I told him what had happened.
Jonah was silent as we followed the girls across Brunswood and into Tulare. When they pulled into the mall parking lot, I screamed inside my head.
He pulled into a spot a few places down from them and turned to me. “Do you think Gavina is forcing these girls to participate?”
I shook my head, thinking. “Juliette was adamant she wasn’t. But…”
“What’s wrong?”
“Her story. At first, I was looking at it through my own experience with Gavina. But now, the more I think about it, the more it just doesn’t make sense. If Gavina doesn’t force them to join, why do they need to learn how to keep her out of Bridgette’s head? And then there’s what Juliette said the first time I met with her. She told me Gavina had stopped whispering to them, and they didn’t know why. But the way she described it sounded as if Gavina was constantly giving them encouragement. Not forcing them to join the gathering. Why do I keep calling it that? It’s a fucking cult.”
“You’re right, on both fronts. And it does sound strange.”
I placed my head in my hands. “Devlin is going to be pissed. I wasn’t my usual self in there. I forgot to ask about blood magick.” Truth be told, I had not been my usual self for weeks now. “And either I’m paranoid, or everyone seems awful interested in my magick.”
Jonah rubbed my back. “Don’t worry about it. He’ll understand. You were blindsided in there.”
We climbed out into the heat. I so did not want to traverse through the damn mall.
“And Logan telling you to look into the history of the phoenix has something to do with your magick as well.” We weaved around a group of teenagers who had decided to stop in the middle of the parking lot, blocking the path. “So, no. You’re not paranoid.”
“Do you think Logan is the one controlling them?”
Jonah shrugged. “What would be his end game?”
“I can’t for the life of me figure out what he wants,” I said as we made our way toward the entrance.
Juliette and Bridgette bounced along, chatting as if they hadn’t just spent the last twenty minutes trying to convince me they needed my help.
“I wish I knew,” Jonah said. “Are you ready to go shopping?”
“No. I’d rather gouge my eyes out. Do you see all these teenagers?” I hated coming to the mall when school let out. Way too many people milling around, getting in the way.
He laughed.
“When’s the next pool party?” I asked, smiling. I needed to take my mind of things for a minute. And block out the current situation we were in. I really hated crowds.
His chest shook with laughter. “I’ll let you and Alek know.”
We spent the next two hours watching Juliette and her sister go from one store to the next, shoplifting. The strange thing about it, though—they were only getting items men would want. Rosalind’s words came back to me. She got the impression a man was influencing Juliette’s decisions. Would an Old One have her shoplift for him, too?
I was so damn confused.
I shared my theory with Jonah about an Old One possibly being involved, and he agreed it made sense.
When we got home, I told Devlin what happened, and Jonah was right—he wasn’t angry. I think we all decided a few days ago that the Young family wasn’t practicing blood magick. It was time to move on. I’d contact Juliette in a few days and try to encourage her to leave.
It took some doing, but I managed to convince Devlin to let me go see Ezra alone to get information on the phoenix history. Alek wasn’t too keen on the idea, but he finally relented after Rachel reminded him she could track my phone. Not creepy at all. Before I walked out the door, Alek pulled me into a kiss that left us both out of breath and me wanting to rip mine and his clothes off. Sadly, it would have to wait.
Lips swollen with need coursing through me like hot lava, I got in my car and headed out to play Russian roulette with my life.
Well, if Ezra did decide to kill me, at least I got to kiss Alek first.