I lean one hand on the counter for support, and grip Thorin’s neck with the other.
“S-so close,” I stutter, caught up in the sight if his dick sliding in and out of me. I’m perched on the kitchen island, feet spread wide, and at the perfect height for Thorin to take me like this. And good God, the angle. He hits me deep, every.single.time, and when that glorious spark ignites at the base of spine, my toes curl, and Thorin’s grasp on my hips tightens.
“Fuck, babe,” he grunts.
Yes, fuck indeed. And he does it so well, too. The man is relentless. And insatiable, it seems. He took me from behind only hours ago—I’m running on four hours sleep, people, but don’t mistake that for a complaint—and interrupted me while I was making breakfast, to, well, have me for breakfast. I bite my lip, and try to swallow the sounds crawling up my throat. At this rate, I’m going to make sure the whole of Horseshoe Bay knows what we’re doing. As it is, were anyone to walk past my living room windows, they’d get a front row view of Thorin’s ass.
“Get there,” he growls, pulling me right to the edge of the countertop. He rubs his pubic bone against my clit—this position gives the man full access—and circles his hips. My mouth pops open, and my pussy clenches. Rather than scream—because, let’s face it, this man’s fucking calls for screaming—I sink my teeth into his shoulder, and bite. Hard. Which is what sets him off. Our orgasms trip over each other, and his muscles tense, our bodies riding out the exquisite high together.
“Jesus,” he breathes, his hips slowing. “I thought taking you from behind made me come hard, but this…” he shakes his head, his forehead sweaty.
I look at where my teeth sunk into his flesh. “Well,” I exhale, “that’s gonna bruise.”
“Crazy woman,” he chuckles.
“Who knew, huh?” I wipe my hair from face, and he tilts my chin, kissing me deeply. So deeply, and so throughly, I squeeze his dick one last time.
His hips piston once in response, and I giggle. “Sorry.” It’s muttered against his lips. He slowly pulls out, and drags his sweats up over his ass.
“Don’t move,” he tells me, a glint in his eye. He stares at my bare pussy, no doubt at the warm liquid I feel is…my cheeks warm. Oh Jesus, he’s so watching his cum leaking out of me. He walks backward, and disappears into the guest bathroom in Mya’s room, coming back with a warm cloth to clean me up. I should be doing it myself, but my legs are kind of stuck. He realizes this, and once he’s satisfied I’m clean, he helps me stand, allowing his giant shirt to cover my lower half. My underwear’s around here somewhere. With my luck—oh look, it’s on the ceiling fan.
“Happy now, Caveman?”
He plants his hands on either side of my hips, and gives me a wolfish grin. “Very. But, after that, I think it’s best we eat. For real this time.”
On cue, my stomach grumbles, and so does his. He kisses my forehead, and it’s a sharp contrast, his tenderness, to what we were just doing. The man’s a beast. “Get comfortable on a chair, and I’ll cook, since I was the one who…distracted…you the first time.”
“Uh, do you think you could…” I point to where my pink cotton panties are hanging precariously from a fan blade. He spots them, and laughs. “Grab those?”
I swat his ass as he walks past, and with little to no effort, he swipes my panties. I slide them back on as soon as he hands them to me, and rather than have him do breakfast alone, I choose to help. It’s quicker with two of us, and in no time, we’re both seated, stuffing food in our mouths. He shoves his plate away, and wipes his mouth, chuckling when he sees I ate just as much as he did, if not more.
“Hungry, huh?”
“You worked up my appetite, fiend.”
He reaches for me, and puts me on his lap. I don’t think he’s stopped touching me at all since last night. Not that I’m much better because I’m reaching for his face, my fingertips brushing over his nose, his lips.
“Are you okay, after last night?” He asks quietly. “After our talk, I mean.”
“I am, actually.” It felt good opening up to Thorin, even if it was largely for his benefit. I wanted to assuage his guilt, or at least help put his mind at ease about our past. Whether or not I succeeded, only time will really tell. His brows furrow, and I use my finger to smooth the creases, aware of the shadows that linger in his eyes. “There was one more thing I wanted to talk about,” he says. He’s relaxed, but it’s his tone that’s cautious, like what he wants to talk about might upset me. I drop my hands to my lap.
“I never apologized for what,” he swallows, “Jessica did to you in high school, for allowing her to get away with so much.”
Now, it’s my turn to frown.
“Or for being a dick back then,” he adds. “For breaking so many promises, over and over again, and not being a better friend.” His frown returns, and whatever’s going through his head right now is clearly making him unhappy.
“It was high school. You’re not the same person you were back then, Thorin.”
“Still, I felt like I needed to say it. Last night couldn’t have been easy for you.”
“It wasn’t,” I admit. “And Jessica will always be a trigger, unfortunately, but—”
“Am I? A trigger?”
I sit up straight. “Not at all. If you were, things wouldn’t have played out the way they did. You wouldn’t have been able to touch me, let alone do…other things, if you were a trigger. Where’s this coming from?” I honestly thought we wiped our slate clean last night. In fact, I thought we got rid of the damn thing altogether.
“I was watching you sleep, and I realized it was something I never apologized for. I know I did when we were kids, but then I kept fucking things up, so I figured it’d mean more to you now than it did back then.”
“I appreciate it.” I rest my hands on his chest. “But, we all did things in high school, and you can’t be responsible for what Jessica did. I thought you knew that?”
“I guess I wanted to be sure, since things have changed between us. I didn’t deserve you back then, babe. Not even as a friend, and—”
I clamp my hand over his mouth. “Stop, Thorin. You’re being too hard on yourself. And maybe you didn’t deserve me, as a friend or as anything else, but that was then. Are you worried that you don’t deserve me now? Is that what’s bothering you?”
I drop my hand, and his silence is the only answer I need. Inwardly, I sigh. What more can I do to help him let go? I can tell him he’s not the same person he was nine years ago, ten years ago, eleven years ago, until I’m blue in the face, but it won’t matter until he believes me.
“I want to be worthy of you,” he murmurs. “I want to earn your love, your trust, your forgiveness.” God, doesn’t he know he has those things already? I may not have said I love him, but what I feel is pretty damn close, and after I bared my soul, surely he would have seen that I both trust and forgive him? Obviously, hearing that he is worthy won’t be enough, so…
“Then earn those things,” I tell him. Thorin is the kind of man driven by purpose, and that’s something I understand. “Woo me, if you want. If that’s what it’s going to take for you to really just let all this stuff go.”
“You’ll give me a shot?” He sounds incredulous. Gah! Why are men so obtuse? Honestly.
“I thought that was implied after everything we spoke about, and after we had sex.”
He’s quiet again, watching me, the cogs in his head turning. Must I spell it out for him? Must I make the first move? Fine. I will.
“Thorin Decker, will you go out with me?”
There, that wasn’t so freckin hard, now was it?
“I’m supposed to ask you that.” His mouth lifts up on side, and hallelujah, the man is smiling again.
“Time’s a wastin’, bud.”
He rewards me with his I’m-a-fucking-rockstar smile, and I light up from the inside out. “Reese Hayes, will you go on a date with me?”
I wrap my arounds his neck, and pretend to think it over, tilting my head to the side. “Fine,” I sigh. “Since you asked so nicely.”
He goes for my ribs, and starts tickling. “Tease.”
I squirm in his lap, and smile. “Had to make you work for that one.”
“I’ll work for all of them,” he tells me, brushing his lips across mine. “And I’ll show you I’m a risk worth taking.”
“I’m betting on that.”
His mouth is on mine, but the moment is cut short by a shrill scream.
Thorin darts up, effectively taking me with him. “What the—”
We look at each other, and at the same time say, “Eli!”
I scramble from his arms, and dart to the bedroom. “I need pants!”
Grabbing the jeans I had on the night before, I hop down the hallway, and manage to zip up just as Thorin flings my front door open. We run to the main house, and come to an abrupt halt when Fletch drags a guy down the front steps, and throws a camera onto the gravel.
“The fuck?” The guy yells, grabbing the camera. “Do you know how much this thing is worth?” He stands, and angrily dusts himself off.
“Yeah? And do you know this is private property, dickhead?” Fletch snaps. “You can’t just walk into this house!”
“Who the fuck are you?” Thorin asks. The guy scowls, and brushes his greasy hair behind his ear. His jeans are dirty, and so is his t-shirt.
“Fucking paparazzi,” Mya says from beside Fletch. “Found him lurking around the damn kitchen.”
“I’m calling the cops,” Thorin says.
“No, no, please, don’t. I just—”
“Wait,” Thorin cuts him off. “Isn’t this the same sleaze bag you found in the garden yesterday?” He looks at Fletch, who nods. “Yeah, but he’s not the first.”
“Damnit,” Thorin mutters, his hands going to his hips.
“What do you mean not the first?” I ask.
“This is part of why I came home early,” he tells me. “Paps have been loitering around the guys’ house, and the ranch lately. Benji caught this fucker here yesterday morning, too.”
“I just wanted some pictures,” the guy says. “Your manager declined an interview.”
“For good reason,” Fletch replies. “We don’t want to speak to the press!”
The guy swiftly lifts his camera, and takes a few shots in rapid succession, then takes off, running down the driveway. Thorin yells as he takes off after the sleaze ball. Fletch is right behind him, and it doesn’t take long for them to tackle the pap to the ground. They get into a scuffle, and after destroying the guy’s camera, Fletch escorts him past the open ranch gates. We should have seen this coming, since everyone knows Thorin and the band are in town, but this guy must be from one of the big cities because no one in Horseshoe would bother Thorin and his bandmates. People here know who they are, since they were all born and raised here, and when they’re in town, they’ll acknowledge them, but then go about their day as if seeing them is nothing out of the ordinary. Hell, not a single picture of them has been posted online since they arrived.
“Nice t-shirt,” Mya says from the porch. I was so worried something had happened to Eli, I forgot what I must look like. She smirks. “Looks like my plan worked, after all.”
“What plan?” I see Thorin and Fletch walking up the drive way in my periphery.
Mya pivots on her heel. “Want some coffee? Looks like you need it.” She disappears inside, and I follow.
“Mya, what plan?” She doesn’t answer me, and that can’t be good. “Mya!”
“Oh, come on,” Mya chides from her spot against the counter. “It’s not as bad as you think. I just paid a few people off, and got the two of you in the same room.”
I want to be mad, or at least a little annoyed, because her meddling knows no limits. But I’m not, because if she hadn’t meddled, last night wouldn’t have happened. Not that I’m going to give her the satisfaction of knowing that.
“And there was no mold in Thorin’s penthouse building either?” I ask, spying Fletch and Thorin coming up the porch steps.
“Nope.” Mya smiles around the rim of her coffee mug, and rather than continue this discussion—I’ll save it for later—I pay attention to Eli. I missed him last night, and judging by the way Thorin smiles when he sees the little tike, he did too.
“Everything okay?” I ask. He pours himself some coffee, and takes a seat next to me at the island. Fletch takes up his spot next to Mya.
“I’m not sure,” Thorin tells me. “I’ll have to call Alex, but I think we’re going to have to get a security system, and maybe consider building a wall around the front end of the ranch. I can’t risk yours, or Eli’s safety, babe.”
“Or yours and the guys’ safety,” I add. “Don’t you think it would be better if you all stayed here? It’s not like we don’t have the space.” Fletch, and Thorin share a look, and Fletch sighs. “She has a point, but I’m not sure what’s going on with Carson. The party last night was his idea.” He casts a glance my way. “And he’s the one who invited Jessica and her friends over after bumping into them at Jameson’s.” Jameson’s is the bar in town, a landmark in Horseshoe Bay, really. It’s been around longer than we’ve been alive. “I’m sorry about not keeping an eye on them, Reese. Benji and I were policing Carson most of the night.”
“Don’t worry about it, thanks for taking care of Mya and Eli while Thorin and I…”
Fletch grins, and so does Mya. “Sorted out your differences?” He chuckles. “It was about time, in my opinion.”
Thorin gives him a high-five, and I can’t help but roll my eyes. Boys.
“But seriously,” Mya says. “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine. I just didn’t expect to find Jessica in my house. I didn’t even know she still lived in town, I’ve never actually seen her around.”
“She doesn’t live in town,” Fletch says, his brows furrowed. “She lives in Austin.”
“Huh.” I look at Thorin. “Maybe last night is exactly what she was hoping for, then. To see Thorin.”
He snorts. “Please, I don’t want a damn thing to do with her. Hopefully, she fucked off back home last night.”
“So, she’s the ex.” The statement comes from Mya. “At least now I know what she looks like, so I can boob-punch her if I ever see her again.”
“You won’t see her again,” Thorin replies, his voice hard. “We’re locking the gates from now on, and no one but us will be allowed on the property. If we see her in town, well, ain’t nothing we can do about that.” When he notices that I’m stiff as a board, he places his hands on my neck, and starts rubbing out the tension. “You don’t have to worry about her, Reese.”
Easier said than done, but I plaster on a smile anyway. Though, it’s meek at best. “No, I know.” I glance down at Eli, and kiss his head. “So, what’s the deal with Carson?”
The question is meant to direct attention away from me, and all talk of Jessica, and if anyone notices how deliberate it is, they don’t mention it.
“You know I told you and Mya he went off the rails half way through the last tour? Well, looks like he’s back to his old tricks again. Not sure if he’s doing drugs, though.” Thorin looks at Fletch, who looks just as concerned. “Not that I’m aware,” he says. “Benji would have picked up on that shit real fast. You know how he feels about that kind of thing.”
When Mya and I remain quiet, Fletch explains, “Benji’s mom was a drug addict. She’s clean now, after he paid for her rehab, but when we were in high school, it was real bad. He cut her out of his life when we went on our first tour, but after we made it big, she asked for his help. Been as clean as a whistle for five years now. Needless to say, he knows the signs when someone is using, it’s how we found out about Carson.”
“That must’ve been hard for him,” I say. “I had no idea.”
“We kept it quiet,” Thorin says. “He spent most of his time at Fletch’s place in high school. His mom used to date other addicts, and sometimes even dealers when we were kids. They used him as a punching bag a time or two, at least until he got bigger and started punching back.”
“He lived with me for senior year,” Fletch adds, his expression contemplative. “Don’t think he would’ve made it through senior year if he hadn’t gotten out of that godforsaken trailer park.” Although the trailer park was demolished about five years ago, it was notorious at some point in time. Now, the land is occupied by a fancy retirement home.
“That’s rough,” Mya says. “No wonder he’s so shut off.”
“Just his way,” Thorin says. “But he’s a good guy.”
My heart hurts for Benji. I had no idea what his life was like, and I’m ashamed to admit I judged him when we were in high school. Guess none of us really knew each other back then, save for me and Thorin.
“And Carson? What’s his story?” I ask.
“Complete opposite,” Fletch says, looking between me and Mya. “Parents were rich as fuck, and didn’t really give a damn about him, or his younger sister. They were raised by the hired help, and then given a fat allowance to stay out of their parent’s way. His sister lives in New York, though, became a model and made her own way. As far as I know, she hasn’t spoken to Carson in over a year, though he won’t say why. Doesn’t talk about her much, either, so I guess there’s no love lost there.”
“So, out of the four of you, you and Thorin had it the best?” Mya asks. Fletch gives her a half-grin, and I swear, she’s making eyes at him.
“Yeah, Thor and I were the lucky ones. My parents were awesome, so were Mr. and Mrs. D.” He folds his muscular arms across his chest—build-wise, he could easily be Thorin’s double—and gives Mya his rockstar smile. Poor girl, those things are potent. His does nothing to me, but Thorin’s? Heh, fuggedaboutit. “What about you, Mya? What’s your story?”
“My parents are first-generation Portuguese-American, and they live in Newton, Massachusetts. I’m the third oldest of six kids, three brothers and two sisters, and have like, forty cousins because I have eighteen aunts and uncles. Typical Portuguese family, I guess. No sob story here.” That’s not exactly true, but I don’t blame Mya for keeping her cards close to her chest. Of course, I know how hard she had it growing up, she was the black sheep of her siblings, and could never do anything right in her parents’ eyes. To some extent, she’s a daddy’s girl, though, and like me, it’s her mother she doesn’t see eye-to-eye with. At all. I met her parents once in the four years we studied together, and to be honest, they’re intimidating people. Filthy rich, too. The only person who never gave Mya a hard time, except about her potty mouth, is her avó. “My craziest years were in college,” she gives me a pointed look. “But, we don’t kiss and tell, do we, Reese?” She winks.
I zip my lips, and pretend to throw away the key. “You’re my ride or die,” I tell her. And I mean it. Mya is loyal to her core, and the sister I never had.
“That really all there is to you?” Fletch asks. He stares at her a moment, and she shrugs. “Sorry to disappoint you, Fletch, but I’m nothing like your groupies.”
“I didn’t assume otherwise. I’d be bored by now if you were.”
“Gee, thanks, Fletch,” Mya scoffs. “Now that I know you find me entertaining, I’ll just sleep so much better tonight.” Hoo boy, the sarcasm with this one is on pointe today.
“You had no trouble sleeping last night.” His smile is so much of smug rockstar. My eyes widen, and I wave my hand between the two them. “You two, uh…”
“Got nekid,” Fetch finishes, all trace of humor gone. “Yes.”
Mya raises her brows. “No, dorkiss, we didn’t, and if we did, clearly you did something very wrong because I don’t remember anything.”
“You wound me.” Fletch clutches his chest, and are rockstars always so dramatic? “I thought we had something special, Mya.”
“In your head, rockstar. Only in your head.” Her annoyance is just an act, and as much as I can tell Fletch enjoys giving her shit, she enjoys giving it back to him just as much. Which has me thinking, perhaps a little fun will be good for her? God knows she had enough drama with Kyle, and if Fletch can help her forget about why she fled to Horseshoe Bay to begin with, am I going to stand in the way of that? I don’t think so. Thorin was right, they’re consenting adults, and if Fletch does end up hurting her, I’ve watched enough episodes of Bones to know how to commit and get away with the perfect murder. Thorin shakes his head, no doubt entertained by Mya and Fletch’s back-and-forth bickering, and winks at me before standing. “So, what’s on the agenda for today?”
“Ugh,” I groan. “Groceries. We need to get some of those.”
“Do they have a salon in town?” Mya asks me, finally diverting her bedroom eyes from Fletch. Thank the damn Pope and his popey people.
“There is actually, why?”
“I’m thinking a girl’s morning, my treat, and then we’ll hit the farmer’s market for some groceries.”
Thorin takes Eli from my arms, and kisses the crown of my head. “I think that’s a great idea, but take my credit card.” He leans down to whisper in my ear. “Buy something sexy for our date, yeah?” Too bad it’s not soft enough because Mya hears ‘date’.
“You’re going on a date?” And there’s the mischief coming out, loud and proud.
“Now you’ve done it,” I mumble to Thorin.
“When?”
“It’s a surprise,” Thorin answers, though I doubt he’s had time to plan anything in the short time since he asked me. “But you girls go have fun. Fletch and I have some things to do around the ranch, we’ll take Eli with us.”
I pout. “You won’t hog him all day, will you?”
“No,” he laughs. “We’ll be here when you get back, babe.”
I smother Eli’s face with kisses. “Good, I need some time with my favorite boy.”
Thorin makes a noise at the back of his throat. “And what am I? Chopped liver?”
“No, you’re the disco stick,” Mya replies. “Obviously.”
“The what now?”
“You know, the Lady Gaga song?” When Fletch and Thorin give her a blank look, she huffs, and then belts out the lyrics, ‘I wanna take a ride on your disco stick, don’t think too much just thrust that dick’. “God,” she huffs, “No culture. Thor, you’re her disco stick, she rides—no, wait, Thor has a hammer.”
Fletch just about busts his gut with laughter because only Mya would be able to talk about Thorin’s hammer so seriously. Never mind that I’m sitting right here, and he’s hammered me six ways from Sunday since last night!
Thorin catches on, and it’s the look on my face, my tomato-red-bordering-on-beet-purple face, that has him joining his bandmate. I cover my face with my hands, and Mya asks, “What?”
I want to bang my head on the counter, and then maybe bury myself in the garden from sheer embarrassment. It builds inside me, until my eyes start to burn. This should be no big deal, damnit, friends joke about everything, and that should include sex, right? So why do I feel like I’m the butt of a joke? I know this feeling, I grew up with this feeling. I hate it. “Mya,” I groan. “Really?”
“Well, am I wrong?”
Naturally, this only makes Thorin and Fletch laugh harder, and it’s about as much as I can take. I stand up, and politely excuse myself. Thorin stops laughing, and chases after me, Eli in tow. I hide my face, afraid that he’ll see my mortification leaking down my cheeks.
“Hey.” He grabs my arm, and spins me into his chest. “We’re just teasing, babe.”
I feel absolutely ridiculous, crying from embarrassment, but Mya knows I’m not comfortable talking about this kind of thing so openly. “Why’re you crying?”
“It’s nothing.” I wipe my face. “Just forget it, okay? I’ll see you later.”
“Reese.” I look up, and Mya’s on the porch next to us, frowning. “I didn’t mean—” She stops talking as soon as she sees my expression, not that I’m even sure how I look because I have no clue where this is all coming from. Maybe I’m not as okay as I thought. Maybe last night has left me just a bit vulnerable with Thorin, and that’s new to me. It’s out of my comfort zone, and while I may have dealt with far worse humiliation, that terrifies me.
“Mya, give us a minute?” Thorin asks. She hesitantly goes back inside.
“I’m being silly, Thorin. It’s nothing.”
“Talk to me.”
I blow out a puff of air, wringing my hands together. “This is just…new to me, okay?”
“What is?”
“Just…I’m not as open about sex as you are. It’s…personal, and I know y’all were just joking around, but I don’t know how to do that. At least, not yet.”
Thorin brushes his hand over my cheek. “I wasn’t laughing at you, Reese, but I understand.” He tilts my chin, and looks me in the eye. “We don’t have to talk about what’s happening between us if you’re not comfortable with it.”
“Can we just keep the bedroom talk between us?” When I say the words out loud, a different kind of embarrassment washes over me, the I-completely-overreacted kind. Because I did overreact.
“Of course we can, I’m sorry I upset you.”
“Not your fault.” I seriously need to get a grip. It’s not like Mya meant any harm, I know she has no brain-to-mouth filter. And maybe that’s my problem—I think too much. “I’m going to get ready. Tell Mya to come to my place?”
He nods, and places the lightest of kisses on my lips. “I’ll see you later.”
Mya finds me in my bedroom a few minutes later, her face taut with worry. “How badly did I screw up?”
“You didn’t,” I sigh. “I just overreacted.”
“I’m sorry, Reese. If I’d known—”
“You didn’t do anything wrong, Mya. I promise. I’m just feeling overwhelmed by what…I’m feeling.”
“I’ll make it up to you.” She wraps her arm around me, and squeezes. And she does. By the time we’re back from being pampered at the salon, and doing our grocery shopping, I’m feeling a lot more settled. I talked it out with her over lunch, and when I broke it down, the way I usually do when I’m overwhelmed, I realized that I’m scared. I’ve never been in a relationship before, and I’m already worried about every which way it can go wrong. Throwing caution to the wind has never been my style, but Mya pointed out that with the right person, it wouldn’t not be scary if it didn’t mean anything. And this thing, whatever it is, with Thorin? It means more than something. It means everything.