Heidi looks broken. More broken than before. She stares at the doorway, as if expecting Alex to come back in at any time.
‘I can’t believe this is happening,’ she says eventually, looking downwards.
‘I’m sure the police will find out what really happened,’ I tell her. ‘They will be able to see that Alex is telling the truth. All this has to have a rational explanation.’
Although I’m not sure what it could be. The coroner can’t have got it so wrong. I wonder, for a moment, if Alex has told us the truth, or is he covering up something else? My gut tells me he’s genuine, though. His story rings true, as does his fear and his sadness.
‘Let’s focus on what we can do to help,’ I tell her. ‘Let’s see if we can find Joe’s diary. If we can find that, and get it to the police, it could help in some way.’
‘Do you think Kathleen or Marie took the diaries? Or Stella?’ Heidi says.
I shake my head. ‘Stella definitely didn’t. I’d know. Possibly Kathleen or Mum.’
‘Do you think the police might have taken them?’
I shake my head again. ‘If they did, they would have told us, or they would have found what he’d written by now. I’m sure of it.’
‘But maybe we should call them. Just to check.’
She is agitated, wringing her hands together and scratching her arm so vigorously, I’m worried she might break the skin.
‘I’ll call them,’ I tell her. ‘And I’ll call Mum and Kathleen, too.’
She blinks at me, her eyes wide with gratitude. ‘Could you? Would you?’
Her vulnerability unnerves me a little. It saddens me. I know I’ve seen it before, when I was young and vulnerable myself. I nod and lift the phone.
As expected, the police confirm they didn’t remove any paperwork from the house. Heidi’s face falls as I tell her the news. I see the livid red marks on her arms from her scratching. I kneel in front of her and take her hands in mine to stop her from hurting herself.
‘You have to stay strong now, okay? For Alex and for Lily. I’ll call Mum and Kathleen now. I know this is scary but,’ I glance down at her arms, ‘hurting yourself isn’t going to help.’
She looks down, startled as if she hasn’t even realised she is doing it, and starts to rub her arms gently.
‘You’re right,’ she says. ‘You’re right.’
I sit beside her while I make the calls.