My day should have been an adventure and a pleasure. Instead, I am left feeling like a total heel, and rightly so. I have done a bad thing and I am feeling it … acutely.*
I am in a daze as we walk to O’Connell Street and, bless Uggs, he does his best to keep me in touch with the world around us.
‘Why are there so many clocks above the shops on this street?’ he asks.
Normally that would provoke a fine discussion, a good argument even.
‘Would you have chosen a particular shop because you loved their clock?’ he wonders.
Dixie is nowhere to be seen and I am glad cos when she appears I’ll have to plaster on a lying smile for her all over my vile face. How can I be such a betrayer of friendship? When did I become sneaky? WHY did I?
‘They’re not all agreed on the time,’ I say. ‘There’s a bit of a difference between them all.’
‘Five or ten minutes,’ he agrees. ‘If you chose the one the buses are ignoring, you’d be out of luck for getting home. There’s probably a big philosophical argument waiting to happen right there.’
‘Uggs …’ I start.
‘No, Jen, it’s OK,’ he says. ‘You’ll tell Dix when you’re ready. You don’t like being crowded and it’s a big thing you’re doing. Take your time.’
How can this guy be so great? He’s thirteen too, so why can’t I be like him?
Dixie slopes out of Primark to the left of us, plastered in make-up – she’s obviously let someone† loose on her face in a department store earlier. And it’s not just make-up; she’s clearly also been sprayed by any perfume seller she’s passed in the last two hours.
She puts bits of hand and arm up to our noses, saying, ‘What do you think of that?’ The tip of my nose now has a concoction of odours on it and I’m not sure I like any of them.
‘Which clock are we going by?’ she asks, like she was listening in on some of our previous wonderings. She’s in tune with Uggs and me, even if she doesn’t know all of what has passed between us. I feel even worse now.
‘Not sure we can trust any of them,’ Uggs says.
I feel this clock discussion could start mirroring my life and how untrustworthy I am as a friend. If I can’t tell all my Bestests what I’m about, how can I be a true friend?
