Twenty minutes later, Gabby stood outside Cade’s door, wearing her glasses, a flannel shirt draped over her T-shirt, and shorts, because she was not going to dress up or put on makeup for him after they’d fought. She crossed her arms to signify that she was still a little irritated with him.
The door opened and he stood there, looking like everything she’d ever wanted. “I’m glad you came,” he said. He looked relieved and happy to see her. The same familiar heat as always engulfed her in flames, and dammit, all that made it impossible for her to stay mad. But she gave it a good try, furrowing her brow and standing firm.
“I’m sorry,” he said. “For how I behaved. I was upset about my father, and I took it out on you.”
“Maybe you overreacted, but I was the one who did something wrong. I should’ve told you about meeting your father. And I shouldn’t have encouraged him without your permission. Sometimes I react emotionally and I want to make everything better. Your dad seemed so…sad. But mostly I guess I thought reconciling would be healing for you too.”
“I understand why you did it. You were trying to help. I need to learn to be a little better at taking help. And listening.”
“Then we’re good,” she said. “You could’ve said that over the phone though.”
“No, I couldn’t have.”
“Why not?”
“Because I needed to do this.” And then his mouth was on hers, kissing her deep and hard, not a hello kiss or a you-look-beautiful kiss, but an I-am-going-to-strip-you-naked-and-kiss-every-inch-of-you-and-have-fabulous-make-up-sex kiss that made every part of her instantly turn to Jell-O. His mouth possessed her, his tongue invaded her mouth, and he made it quite clear that he was very, very sorry.
Wow. When they finally came up for air, she became dimly aware that he was holding her by the arms and steadying her just in case she happened to wither to the floor in a boneless heap. Which at this point seemed a distinct possibility.
“Please come in,” he said, placing his hand on her forearm and leaving it there for a few seconds. Its heat seeped into her, making her want to curl into his big body and say, Forget about it, no biggie, all is well.
But she’d done that in the past. Not demanded much of any man. Forgave all without much explanation. She’d never insisted upon intimacy from anyone. This time was going to be different.
She let him take her hand and lead her to the couch. The room was cozy and dim; one floor lamp was on by his favorite chair. All of Ava’s toys were tossed into the cute basket they’d bought and pushed back beside the couch.
Cade held her hand, rubbing his thumb against her palm as he spoke, which probably wasn’t playing fair, but she didn’t want to pull away. “I understand how harboring anger eats you from the inside, and I try not to be angry. It’s just that my father has created a lot of havoc and hurt. I don’t want it to happen again.”
She’d never seen him so open and vulnerable. He was good at protecting his heart, that was for sure, and who could blame him? His own father had abused it, as had his wife, in the worst possible ways. No wonder he had trust issues.
But so did she—in the opposite way. She thought everyone was a good, solid, heart-of-gold kind of person. She wore her heart on her sleeve, and that was a very easy place for it to get rubbed against and bruised.
Gabby tried to explain where she was coming from. “The fact that I grew up without a mother and longed for her so badly—and the fact that you have a dad—even if he’s somewhat of a scoundrel—seems like it might be worth the gamble. Maybe he meant it about changing, Cade. He was definitely sober tonight.”
“You always see the best in people.”
“And in you,” she countered.
He chuckled.
“By the way, did your ex remember Ava’s birthday?” Gabby asked softly.
“No. And Ava was asking about her.”
What reason do you give for your kid’s mother forgetting her birthday? Gabby couldn’t even fathom. “I’m sorry, Cade. And I’m sorry for Ava.”
“I have to be honest,” he said, not releasing her hand. “When I found out that you didn’t tell me about my dad, it reminded me of all the things Emerson kept from me. She kept a lot from me. Her anger and resentment, namely. And the fact that she’d started seeing other men.”
“Oh God.” She held his face in her hands. “Cade,” she whispered, looking deeply into his eyes, “I’m not Emerson.”
He swallowed and nodded. “I know that,” he said softly. “And about my dad—I’ll think about letting him see Ava. After I’m sure he means it—when I see that he’s genuinely changed, if that’s even possible with him.”
Gabby smiled. “Sounds fair.”
“And now I want a chance to make up with you.”
“You could say you’re sorry again,” she suggested, as he came closer.
“Um, I had another tactic in mind.”
“Which is?”
“Begging your forgiveness in a completely different way.”
“That sounds very interesting.”
“Oh, it is. But to see me grovel you have to promise me something.”
“What’s that?” Anything.
“That you’ll stay with me.”
“Here? Tonight?” Whoa. She understood that this was a big deal for him, to have her stay over with Ava here. She wanted to let him know she got that, so she pulled out her phone.
“What’s this?” he asked.
She held up the screen.
He frowned as he focused on it. “You set an alarm for two a.m.?”
“In case we fall asleep.”
He tugged the phone out of her hand and punched a few things.
“What are you doing?” she asked.
“First of all, there won’t be much sleeping going on, at least if I have my way. Second, I hate the thought of you going home alone in the middle of the night. But I do appreciate your concern for Ava.” He held up her phone. It showed that he’d reset the alarm for six. “That okay? Even that’s early, but—”
She rested her hand on his forearm, where she felt the quiet, warm strength of him. She also saw the determination in his eyes. “I get it. No explaining necessary.”
“Ava will probably wake up shortly after that. She’s got a field trip tomorrow to the bread bakery outside of town, and she was pretty pumped.”
He stood and offered her his hand, which she took readily. At the top of the stairs, he took a quick detour to check on Ava. Then he led her to his bedroom.
As soon as the door shut, he grasped her top and tugged it off, doing the same to his own shirt and shorts, then shucking off his briefs. He came to stand in front of her, beautiful, purposeful, naked.
“You don’t waste any time, do you?” she asked. “Not that I’m complaining.”
“Never.”
His eyes held hers, not straying, and they were filled with everything she’d ever wanted to see—want, need—yes. But more—a full, welcome acceptance, of all of her, that she’d never felt before from anyone. Dimly, in the background, she registered a bed nearby, a dresser. But mostly just Cade. All Cade.
He tugged on the waistband of her shorts. “Take these off,” he said, his voice low and breathy. And oh, she loved this Cade, who was going to let nothing stand in his way. She complied. He unhitched her bra with one studied flick. It seemed to slide right off her and drop to the floor. Then he led them both to the bed.
“And now I grovel. Be prepared.” He kissed her hard, intensely, deeply, taking her breath and her balance. She lay a hand on his chest to steady herself, and felt his heartbeat, steady and strong in his chest. She let him back her up against the bed until they both fell on it in a tangled heap.
“I love this groveling,” she managed.
“Honey,” he whispered close to her ear, “you haven’t seen anything yet.”
He gave her a few more kisses, slow and luxuriant this time, then he pulled his lips away and came to kneel beside her. A twinkle shone in his eyes as he positioned himself near her feet. He bent and kissed the arch of her foot. “I’m so sorry,” he said.
“I forgive you,” she replied.
He kissed her other foot. “Really sorry.”
“Cade, you’re so silly. Get back up here.”
“Oh no. You’re getting the full grovel experience.”
She rolled her eyes. “Okay, let’s not get carried away.” But oh, she wanted to be carried away, swept off her feet. She wanted all of it, with him, like she’d never wanted a man before. And he was thrilling her in a way that she’d never experienced.
He proceeded to kiss up her calves, behind her knees, farther up her legs, tracing a trail with his tongue to the apex of her thigh. She quivered at his touch, her body on fire, tense and taut, anticipating what he was about to do.
He was bent low over her, and she could clearly see the dim light from the street shining off sculpted hills of muscle as he purposely went to his task.
Then his tongue was on the most sensitive parts of her, pressing into her flesh. Her legs dropped open, and a moan escaped her throat. His fingers joined his skillful mouth, plying her swollen flesh.
Thoughts fled, her pulse pounding wildly, her body tight as a rubber band, as she lost control. She dragged her hands through his hair, over the smooth curve of his shoulders, then clutched him, fevered and panting, riding the intense waves that shook her to her core. Cade. She wasn’t sure if she cried his name out loud but he was all she knew, inside and out.
“Forgive me now?” he whispered when the waves had finally ebbed. “I hope so,” he added with a playful grin. He was over her now, entering her, filling her, and it was too much sensation, too much pleasure, her body still vibrating with the waves of her release. But he began to rock against her, creating a friction that welled up inside of her and made her just as needy as before.
He looked at her lovingly, worshipingly, honestly, like he was seeing all of her, and that look devastated her, because she knew deep in her heart—she knew—that for her there was no turning back. This was it, this was the man, this was the life, and she didn’t dare think beyond that.
His thrusts became more urgent, more purposeful, and she clung to him as he drove himself deeply inside her and she began to spin off into another blinding climax. He kissed away her cries even as he shuddered and cried out himself, both of them finally falling over the edge.
Afterward he held her tightly, their breaths coming rapidly in the silent, dark room. Gabby felt the pounding of his heart next to her, the dampness of his skin, the warmth of his body as he leaned his head against hers. He had spoken no words of love, but everything he’d done had revealed something that answered a cry deep in her heart. She didn’t want to—couldn’t—think of what any of this meant. And so she tried to lighten things up.
“Is this how it’s going to be every time we have a fight?” she asked, playing with the hair at the back of his neck.
He gathered her in, wrapping his arms around her. “I’m willing to concede any argument to you if this is the result.”
She felt him smile against her cheek as he kissed her there, his head still resting against hers. Then they fell asleep, tangled in each other’s arms.
* * *
Cade startled suddenly sometime in the middle of the night, all at once opening his eyes. In his half-awake state, he became aware of Gabby’s soft, warm body, clothed in his T-shirt and flannel pants, her hair silky and springy against his chest and neck and tickling his nose. Besides putting on his clothing, she’d also double-checked her alarm and placed her phone on the bedside table next to her.
Instinctively, he smoothed down her hair, and she stretched in her sleep, her soft curves molding up against him. He draped an arm around her, and she snuggled into him further, which had the disconcerting effect of arousing him yet again. He nuzzled her neck, kissing it gently until she stirred and tilted her head back to give him better access.
“Daddeee,” came a voice from the hall that appeared to be coming closer like the whistle of an oncoming train. Within seconds, the train had arrived, Ava hurtling herself at him with the speed that only a child’s nightmare could fuel. Cade disengaged himself quickly from Gabby and turned his body in Ava’s direction, sitting up quickly to block Ava from seeing Gabby, who had suddenly tensed beside him.
“Daddy, Daddy, I had a bad dweam,” Ava cried, grabbing him with a death grip around his neck and sobbing.
“It’s okay, sweetheart,” he soothed, rubbing her head. “It’s just a dream.” Cade worked hard to pivot his body, to get himself and Ava headed back in the direction of Ava’s room before she could sense that Gabby was in his bed.
“Daddy,” she said, her head popping up from his shoulder. “Daddy, who is that?”
Oh, fuck.
Then she was squirming and using her arms to push down out of his grasp. She’d no sooner hit the floor with her bare feet than she’d cried out, “Gabby! Gabby’s here!” and padded over to Gabby’s side.
Gabby sat up. She blinked a few times in the light that was pouring in from the hall and rubbed her eyes. Her gaze caught his for one second, as if she was deciding what to do. Then she smiled, opened her arms wide, and let his daughter jump right into them.
“I had a bad dweam,” Ava repeated. “There was a bear, and a monster, and a giant dog with big teeth, and he wanted to bite me!”
“Did you bite him back?” Gabby asked, smoothing down Ava’s jumbled hair, rubbing her back. “I heard you’re good at that.”
She glanced at Cade again, who shot her a warning glance, but he couldn’t help smiling.
Ava made herself more comfortable on Gabby’s lap, snuggling in. “I bited him back and said, ‘Grrrr! Go away, mean dog!’ And he did.” Now she was embellishing, a sure sign she’d all but forgotten her nightmare. She picked up a handful of Gabby’s hair. “You have pretty hair. Why are you sleeping with Daddy?”
Cade closed his eyes. He had no words. He felt like the worst father that ever walked the planet. He’d done his best to always put Ava first and the one time he didn’t—
“Because I really, really like him,” Gabby said exuberantly, giving Ava a squeeze. “And I really, really like you. How about we get a glass of water and I’ll walk you back to your bed. Because you have a very busy day tomorrow with your field trip and I want you to be very rested.”
“Okay,” Ava said. “We’re going to the bwead factory and everybody says we get a whole loaf to take home!”
“Well, I love bread, so save me a piece, okay?”
His daughter turned around at the doorway to give him a quick wave and a “Night, Daddy!” The chattering continued down the hall as Gabby led Ava back to her room.
Cade sat down on his bed and let out a big breath. That didn’t go so badly. Ava had taken that quite in stride. His daughter was clearly infatuated with Gabby. And she wasn’t the only one.
* * *
The following Friday, Gabby took the entire day off. She was happy to be off work, but truthfully work was going a little better—managing Nonna’s stock portfolio and helping her set up a trust and rewrite her will had given her the idea to ask if she could work with more seniors. Milo actually thought it would be good for the firm’s reputation for her to do some pro bono work one half day a week. Which she actually was thrilled about. Two of Nonna’s friends from the senior center had already come in to update their wills.
It wasn’t that working with seniors made her love her job so much more but it definitely had made it more tolerable. And just the fact that the senior partners had been amenable to letting her do something she felt passionate about was a plus.
Gabby spent the morning sitting at her mother’s desk drinking coffee and tapping away on her laptop. Out her window, the fields bloomed with goldenrod, and the sky was such a pure blue it nearly took her breath away. It was a perfect day in just about every sense of the word. Not because she was actually writing a story or because sometimes she actually felt like a writer, but because something was different about herself.
Cade had given her the courage to really try and make a go of this. He’d believed in her talent and ability and had pushed her to write the best story she could write.
Plus, something else amazing was happening. She was getting used to this, the routine of sitting down to write. It still took her all day to get a word count down and she struggled a lot but it was…fun.
At around ten o’clock Gabby stood and stretched, poured another cup of coffee and decided to check her email. In her inbox was a name she had to reread twice before she could process it—Joanna Devereaux. The name of a very successful New York agent she’d heard of because…well, because everyone in the writing world knew about her. She represented star-power authors whose names were as familiar to most people as rock stars and Hollywood celebrities. Why on earth would someone like Joanna be emailing her? It was probably spam. With trembling fingers, she clicked on the email.
I had the opportunity to read your first 3 chapters and I’d love to read the rest. Please consider sending. Best, Joanna
Gabby’s mouth dropped open. She had to press both hands over her chest because it felt like her heart was about to grow wings and beat straight out of her body. Someone with credibility wanted to read her manuscript, was interested in something she’d written.
She must surely be dreaming, because she suddenly realized she’d never sent Joanna Devereaux her manuscript. In fact, she hadn’t sent anyone her manuscript. She got up from her desk and paced the room.
She walked back to her computer and did some furious Googling, and within a minute she had the answer. She hadn’t sent Joanna her manuscript when she was drunk or in a trance. But Cade must have. Because Joanna Devereaux was his agent.