FORTY-ONE

Junkfood John here, continuing the story.

Luke Puke, Nervous Rex, Rob Slob, and I stayed up late to celebrate. The others were exhausted from all the tension and excitement and went to bed. Even Mama.

I ate two bags of tortilla chips and a couple frozen pizzas to tide me over till breakfast. Rob Slob pulled some crumbs from his hair and ate them. I have no idea what they were.

Nervous Rex paced back and forth, his hands clasped behind his back.

“Rex, what’s your problem?” Luke Puke asked.

Rex shook his head. “I’m w-worried. I think Mama is going to be trouble. We’ve always done fine without any parents. I just know we’re going to be s-sorry.”

Rob Slob burped four or five times. Then he said, “Sorry? Why will we be sorry?”

And then we heard a deep rumble of thunder.

No, not thunder.

Rex stopped walking back and forth. Luke jumped to his feet. Rob stopped burping.

Another deep rumble shook the walls.

“What is that noise?” Luke asked.

The four of us tiptoed to the back hall. The lights were out, but we could see that Mama’s bedroom door was open. Another roar made the floor tremble beneath us. And I thought I heard the ceiling crack.

“She—she’s snoring!” Rex exclaimed.

I dropped the bag of chocolate-covered cotton-candy chips I had in my hand. “Yeah, she’s snoring, all right.”

“RRRRRHONNNNNK RRRRRRHHHHHHNNNNNNK!”

Behind us in the living room, Pooper started to howl. Dogs have sensitive hearing, and it was more than he could take.

I covered both of Pooper’s ears. But I couldn’t shut out the deafening snores.

“RRRRRHONNNNNK RRRRRRHHHHHHNNNNNNK!”

“RRRRRHONNNNNK RRRRRRHHHHHHNNNNNNK!”

The ceiling cracked some more.

“The noise—it’s vibrating in my head! I . . . I feel sick!” Luke Puke cried. He covered his mouth and went running to the bathroom.

“RRRRRHONNNNNK RRRRRRHHHHHHNNNNNNK!”

Everyone came running out of their rooms.

“Earthquake!” Wacky Jackie yelled. “Everyone duck under a table!”

“RRRRRHONNNNNK RRRRRRHHHHHHNNNNNNK!

“RRRRRHONNNNNK RRRRRRHHHHHHNNNNNNK!”

“There’s a bear in the house!” Babbling Brooke screamed. “Run for your lives!”

They couldn’t escape from the hall—my stomach blocked their way. “There’s no bear,” I said. “It’s Mama. She snores kind of loud.”

“RRRRRHONNNNNK RRRRRRHHHHHHNNNNNNK!”

The snores were so loud they even woke up Adam Bomb, who came staggering into the hall rubbing his head. “What’s up? What’s happening?” he asked.

It usually takes Adam a couple of days to recover after his head blows up. But even a headless kid couldn’t stay asleep with those roaring snores shaking the house apart.

“Adam—it’s Mama,” I said. “She—”

CRRASSH!

We all jumped. Paintings were coming off the walls. I ducked as plaster fell from the ceiling and landed all around me.

“We’ve got to do something!” Nervous Rex cried, holding his ears.

“I have an idea,” Handy Sandy said. “And I think it will work.”

“What’s your idea?” Brainy Janey asked.

“Close her door,” Sandy said.

She and Janey crept up to Mama’s bedroom. Silently and slowly, they pulled the door shut.

Would that make it quieter?

“RRRRRHONNNNNK RRRRRRHHHHHHNNNNNNK!”

No—Mama’s bedroom door cracked off its hinges and fell to the floor.

“RRRRRHONNNNNK RRRRRRHHHHHHNNNNNNK!”

“My ears are bleeding!” Nervous Rex cried.

“What are we going to do?” Sandy asked.

Brainy Janey stepped up to the fallen bedroom door. “I have another idea,” she said.