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EMMA
Dad picked me up from the bus station and I tried to act like everything was great, but he was my dad and he saw through all my bullshit. Instead of taking me home, we stopped at Harriet's Diner, the restaurant Jake's parents owned, for a burger. We ordered, and then Dad's ice-blue eyes were trained on my face and I was withering under his silent cross-examination.
"What's going on? No more sugary crap, just the truth."
"Nothing's going on."
"And you think I believe that?"
So many lies and all I could think to do was stretch the truth. "I met a guy but I don't think it's going to work out."
Dad shifted in his seat. The conversation of boys clearly hit a nerve. "Why not?" he asked, trying to sound sincere, like he wasn't unhappy about this revelation.
"He's not right for me. I like him, but it just can't work."
"You're young and have lots of time to meet boys," Dad said relieved. "I was worried this had to do with Jake."
"No, nothing to do with Jake." At least that part was true, right at this particular moment. I was too upset about Zach to even think about Jake.
"Do you want to tell me what happened?"
The food arrived, buying me a few more seconds of stalling. I grabbed a French fry and dipped it into my ketchup a million times until it resembled a limp noodle. "Do I have to?"
"I suppose not, but you seem down. Did he hurt you?" Dad asked, his eyes narrowing.
"No, he's a really nice guy."
"Then what's the problem?"
I dropped the fry onto my plate, but didn't look up at Dad. "When I meet the right guy, I want it to be real. I'm not sure he does real."
"He's a player," Dad deduced.
"Pretty much."
"I was one of those. Stay away from them. Look, Kiddo, you'll meet other guys. If you don't have a good feeling about this one, then it's best to walk away."
But part of me did have a good feeling about Zach, and that's what was eating me up. The other part of me was issuing a constant reminder that I didn't want to end up like the Beccas of the world. At the end of the day Zach's word didn't mean all that much. He could say anything he wanted, but that didn't mean three months from now he'd still want to be with me.
"Can we talk about something else? Having the boy talk with my dad is kind of weird."
He laughed. "Let's talk Christmas. I should probably tell you that Dad has invited Wendy for dinner. She's nice enough, but I kind of like when it's just the three of us."
That was it? End of interrogation? Boy, I'd gotten off easy.
"Do you like her?"
"I do, but I guess it feels like Mom is being replaced."
"You know that he's not trying to replace her. He just doesn't want to be lonely. And sorry, Dad, you just aren't cutting the mustard."
"I suppose."
We finished our burgers and I was anxious to get home. I needed the safety of our house, a place that was my own. The short drive from Harriet's had me edgy. I couldn't keep my feet still and their constant tapping resulted in a look from Dad. I stopped. I nearly jumped out of the moving car when Dad pulled into our gravel driveway. Grandpa met me at the front door and gave me a big bear hug. I missed this so much.
"My girl is home! We missed you, Emma," Grandpa said, kissing the top of my head.
"I missed you guys, too," I said burying my face in his shoulder. If I cried now, they'd never leave me alone.
"Did your dad tell you about Wendy?" he asked.
"Yes, and I'm happy she's coming."
"Are you sure?" I didn't know why they thought I'd be so bothered by it. Of course, they couldn’t know that I was more concerned with our Christmas Eve dinner at Jake's parents' house. He and I would be in the same room for the first time since he'd kicked me out.
"Yes, of course. It'll be nice having another woman around."
Grandpa beamed. "I hoped you'd say that. Now let's get inside before we get a chill."
Yes, being home was exactly where I needed to be.
#
A PART OF ME HOPED that Zach would call or even text. Days, then weeks, went by without a word. I was getting ready for dinner at the Bennetts’ house and wished to hear some comforting words from Zach. I pulled out my phone and hesitated for a long time before sending him a text.
Me: I wanted to wish you a Merry Xmas. Hope all is well. I'm going to Jake's tonight so that will be super awkward. Say hi to your parents.
I waited, not that he'd text me back instantly. But what if he didn't text at all? I sent Genie a text too and finished getting ready. What would I say to Jake? Would we just pretend it was all happy times? What if Bianca was there? My phone buzzed. I ran for it, excited for a response from Zach.
Genie: Merry Christmas to you too. See you in a couple of weeks.
I wanted to text her back to see if she was with Zach, but instead I put my phone in my pocket and met Dad and Grandpa downstairs.
"Ready to go?" Dad asked, getting into his coat.
"You bet." It was now or never.
The Bennetts lived less than a block away. I'd walked this route so many times I could recognize every imperfection in the sidewalk. The three of us trudged through the newly fallen snow and I longed for my phone to sing to me. It didn't.
"Emma, what do you know about Jake's girlfriend? Ron asked me and I said I'd ask you."
Just the subject of Bianca raised my already sky-high blood pressure. What if she was there? The whole afternoon I'd vacillated between all-out panic and then a minute or two of calm once I temporarily convinced myself she wouldn’t be. Then I'd think of her again, and my hands and body would shake. I tried to busy myself with laundry, baking a pie for the Bennetts, and some reading, but all the words melted into each other. I didn't even remember what book I'd attempted to read. Mercifully, the pie and laundry were unscathed.
"Not much." More lies.
"I'm getting the impression the Bennetts don't care for her. This is the first time Jake hasn't spent Christmas with his family."
I skidded to a stop. "What?"
Dad glanced over at me looking puzzled. "You knew that, didn't you?"
"Right, sorry, my head was in the clouds."
Dad took a long hard look at me but resumed walking. "Ron was so pissed off. You don't bail on a Bennett family Christmas."
I wanted to let out a gasp of relief. This news couldn't be any better. I wouldn't have to face Jake, and Dad wouldn't be able to use his super-parent power to figure out something was amiss.
"The only thing I know for sure is that Jake really likes her." Finally, some truth out of my mouth.
"Ron and his parents are going to grill you."
"Dad, I don't have much to add. I barely know her."
"Apparently she's all Jake talks about. Not with you?"
"No, not really."
I checked my phone again. This time there was a text, one I hadn't heard.
000:000:0000: Merry Christmas Bitch.
I gasped. Who would send me this? I stopped again to reply.
Me: Who is this?
"Something wrong?" Dad asked.
"Just someone from school," I said in a fake voice. Dad had to know I was full of it.
This time I heard the chime as the response came in.
000:000:0000: The person who's going to fuck you up.
My insides tightened. Bianca. Who else? I didn't know whether to be worried or angry, so I chose neither. The best course of action with a person like Bianca was to ignore her. If she kept it up, then I'd go to Jake. He'd stop this. She wanted to ruin my Christmas even though she had Jake safely in her clutches. I deleted the two texts and put my phone away. Bianca Smythe could shove it up her ass.