-CHAPTER 6-

Mean Grills (She Doesn’t Even Grill Here)

Are you ready to make^{make out with} America’s favorite grilled meats? Let’s make Amber D’Alessio proud. This chapter includes recipes for your grill that are not only chock-full of flavor, but also won’t cause you to singe off your eyebrows. (The au naturale bushy Caroline Krafft look is so in right now, so don’t stand

too close.) Our Hot as Africa Pepper Chicken (here) is so hot it caused the back building to burn down in 1987. We’ve also got a great burger recipe, so you can take the night off of going to Taco Bell and skip that bathroom line at Barnes & Noble (sorry Gretchen, I know it was an emergency). We even have a great vegetarian option for all those non-meat eaters out there. (You know who you are, and so do we because you won’t stop telling us.) This bowl of jungle vegetables is sure to make you go wild, Principal Duvall style.

Invite your nearest and dearest, put on your ugliest effing skirt, and invite all your Plastic friends over for a balling BBQ. Just remember to ask Ms. Norbury to stop by after she bartends down at T.J. Calamity’s; maybe she’ll bring you some meth^{a six-pack.}