The Nuckalavee was in darkness so they could not really see him properly. But whatever he was, he was BIG. He loomed over them like a great gloomy precipice, only his thirteen yellow eyes visible, staring down at them. His voice bellowed and echoed most eerily around that cavern. Every now and then he gulped, as if there was something stuck in his throat and it was bothering him. It was most disconcerting.
“WHOOOOOO ARE YOUOUUUUUUUU?” repeated the Nuckalavee. Gulp.
Both Wish and Xar knew better than to answer that question correctly. You start telling your real name to a beast that ghastly in a cave that eerie, and you’re deader than doornails before you’ve even started.
They tried to keep their Magic staffs steady, pointing them straight at the gigantic horror in front of them, but my goodness, even the staff in Xar’s hand was slipping and sliding in his panicky sweating palm.
“We are humans,” said Wish.
“Very, very powerful humans,” said Xar, hoping to impress the mammoth opponent in front of him. “We may look unimpressive, but we have Magic swords and Magic eyes, and the girl here has more than one life and everything… and we’re here on a very important shadow quest.”
“Your Magic will not work in here,” said the Nuckalavee.
Oh dear.
Xar tried to cast a spell with his staff, and sure enough, nothing happened.
Wish put her eyepatch up a smidgeon, and her Magic wasn’t working either.
Oh dear, oh dear, oh DEAR. This already wasn’t going well.
“Why were you talking to the dead Wizard?” said the Nuckalavee.
“Dead Wizard? What dead Wizard?” said Xar.
All thirteen of the Nuckalavee’s eyes turned toward Bodkin, crouched, shaking, on his ledge.
“That dead Wizard,” said the Nuckalavee. “The boy-who-didn’t-take-his-shoes-off.”
“He’s not a dead Wizard. He’s a Warrior and he’s alive,” said Wish.
Unbeknownst to Wish and Xar, this was good news for the Nuckalavee. The Nuckalavee had an aura about him that dampened and digested the Magic of Wizards, but it worked better when they had their shoes off. The Nuckalavee’s Magic-quenching properties traveled up through their bare feet and smothered the Magic inside them most effectively.
When they kept their shoes on, the Nuckalavee had to fight them before he killed them, which took a lot of energy. Even though Wizard Magic didn’t work well against him, Wizards were very clever and tricksy at using magical objects.
However if the boy-who-didn’t-take-his-shoes-off wasn’t a Wizard after all, he wasn’t going to be a problem.
The Nuckalavee relaxed.
“He won’t be alive for long,” said the Nuckalavee. “He can’t stay up there forever. He will starve and if he comes down, I will kill him. Normally I offer visitors to my island the chance to make a bargain with me. But they have to take their shoes off before they come here. This boy was dead the moment he stepped on my island… in shoes,” said the Nuckalavee. “Dead boys can’t make bargains.”
It wasn’t a great start to a conversation, on the whole.
“You, however, are both shoeless,” said the Nuckalavee. “And therefore you are welcome to try to make a bargain with me… if you wish. What are you bringing me?” asked the Nuckalavee.
“We’re not bringing you anything,” said Xar. “We didn’t know we were supposed to bring you something.”
“Don’t you know the rules of this particular shadow quest?” asked the Nuckalavee.
The eyes, from their various different perches on the Nuckalavee’s great barnacled head, swiveled in to look down. Six of them looked at Xar. And seven of them at Wish.
The eyes were old, and it was very difficult to see their expression.
“Foolish,” said the Nuckalavee, “to come on a quest without knowing the rules yet.”
“But the rules are a secret!” Wish pointed out. “Apart from the bit about taking off your shoes!”
“Taking off your shoes is polite,” said the Nuckalavee, “and shows me that you can follow the rules.
“Now let me tell you the rules of this particular shadow quest,” continued the Nuckalavee. “You don’t have to accept the bargain I offer, because at least you have taken your shoes off. You can walk away from this cavern free and alive. But if you take the bargain, then you must keep to the rules and pay the price I ask. Is that understood?”
“Yes,” said Wish.
“I am a sin collector…” said the Nuckalavee, “a secret keeper… a guardian of power… I am a prisoner of the Droods, and the shadow men and women come to me and I look after objects for them that are too dangerous to be in the world.”
That would explain the extraordinary amount of treasure in that cavern.
This was the secret of the Nuckalavee. It was all treasure that the Droods and the Wizards considered needed guarding.
“And in return…” said the Nuckalavee.
“Yes,” said Xar. “In return?”
“You answer a riddle that I ask you,” said the Nuckalavee. “If you win, you walk out of here, free and alive.”
“And if we lose?” asked Xar.
“The shadow men and women who lose stay here on this island to look after me,” said the Nuckalavee. “I turn them into nixes and they become my slaves forever…”
Oh dear.
A nasty, clammy, cold feeling stole over Wish and Xar.
“The clever and the lucky know the answer to my riddle,” said the Nuckalavee. “They are the ones who escape. Accepting my bargain takes courage.
“Now, what is the treasure that you have brought me?” said the Nuckalavee. “Is it that staff you are carrying? It looks a very powerful one…”
“We already said, we have nothing to bring you,” said Wish, her voice trembling with fear. “And in fact, we are wanting to change the rules slightly…”
The Nuckalavee’s eyes narrowed. His yellow eyes blazed orange for a second. “I hate it when people want to change the rules,” said the Nuckalavee. “It’s like people who come here without removing their shoes. Very rude.”
“It’s just a small change…” said Wish. “We don’t want to BRING you something. We want to TAKE something from you. Two things, actually. If we lose, we will stay here as your slaves. But if we win, you must give back the life of my bodyguard, and… you must also give us four of your scales,” stammered Wish. Suddenly the request did seem a little, well, cheeky. “I hope you won’t miss them. You have an awful lot of scales, after all.”
All thirteen of the Nuckalavee’s eyes swiveled to look at Wish.
“Really? You want me to give you four of my scales?” said the Nuckalavee, repeating Wish’s request thoughtfully. “Now, that IS an interesting suggestion. My scales are very precious, of course… they’re powerful, powerful Magic, and they make the bearer a mighty Wizard indeed. But Magic as potent as this must be handled very carefully.”
“It’s for a good cause,” said Wish. “The scales are ingredients in a spell to get rid of Witches.”
The Nuckalavee thought for a very long time, all of his yellow eyes looking this way and that over Wish and Xar and their companions. Wish could feel her stomach going liquid with fear.
“If you want to change the rules,” said the Nuckalavee, at last, “in all fairness, I must be allowed to change the rules too. You have asked for two things, so if you guess the answer to my riddle, I will want two things back. You must not only answer my riddle correctly, you must also perform a task for me. If you do both of those things, you can walk out of this cavern free as birds, and take the boy-who-didn’t-take-his-shoes-off with you. Otherwise, you stay here as my slaves just like the others.”
“What is this task we have to perform?” said Xar.
“I have something in my throat that has been bothering me for twenty years,” said the Nuckalavee, and he gulped again. They could hear from his voice that there was indeed something that had lodged in there. “You must walk into my mouth and remove it for me.”
“But if we walk into your mouth you might just swallow us!” said Xar.
“I promise not to swallow you,” said the Nuckalavee. “That is part of the bargain. I want this thing removed, and you can remove it. And I think that you are both lucky and clever, and that you will know the answer to my riddle. Do you take my offer?”
“You swear that if we walk into your mouth, you will not shut your mouth and swallow us?” said Wish suspiciously.
“You drive a hard bargain, small girl. But I swear by mistletoe and all things Magic, I will not shut my mouth and swallow you,” said the Nuckalavee. “My life shall be the forfeit if I break this promise. That is our contract if you care to take it. But if you do not take it… the boy-who-did-not-take-his-shoes-off is dead indeed.”
How could they turn this deal down when Bodkin’s life would be the forfeit?
The idea of climbing into the Nuckalavee’s mouth and removing something from it, trusting that he would not close it, was very unpleasant indeed. But what do you expect from a shadow quest? Of course it was going to be gruesome and challenging and terrifying. If the ingredient you are searching for represents courage, well, it seems logical that your bravery should be properly tested in order to find it.
Wish and Xar had a short, whispered conversation.
“I think the Nuckalavee wants us to win the bargain. His voice sounds terrible. I know how I feel if I even have a sore throat for a week. Imagine having one for twenty years!” said Wish. “The Nuckalavee will feel better if we take whatever it is out, and a promise made on mistletoe and all things Magic is an unbreakable promise.”
“We’ve come all this way,” said Xar. “And we need those scales. The Nuckalavee says we are lucky and clever, and we are… He thinks we might know the answer to his question. We need to have courage…”
“Don’t take the bargain, Wish and Xar!” Bodkin shouted down. “Seriously, Wish, as your bodyguard I have to urge you not to do this!”
But Xar and Wish took the Nuckalavee’s bargain.
They swore the oath of the shadow quest.
And the Nuckalavee asked his riddle.