Adams was in the bathroom when she arrived. She wondered what it would be like to share his shower.
When Adams cleared his voice at the door, Akinyi looked at him from a whole new perspective, and she wondered what it would feel like to share his house for a short while.
“What a pleasant surprise! I was beginning to think that you had forgotten all about me,” Adams said, entering the sitting room. He smelt of soap, his aftershave and his sweet natural scent that she had come to associate with only him. His white shirt and blue thigh hugging jeans made Akinyi feast her eyes on him until he got to his seat. She could not just help it. Something innate was driving her to him, something beyond her control.
“This is awkward, but I have to ask,” Akinyi said, looking into his eyes to gauge his mood.
“Go ahead,” Adams urged her.
She plucked up her courage and asked, “My mother’s last dying wish is that I should get a husband. I have explored all my options, and I think you are my best bet.” She finished and felt all too tired and relieved at the same time. However, she was worried when Adams frowned and shifted uncomfortably in his seat.
“Let me get this right. You want me to be your husband. You wanted nothing to do with me because I was once a man in uniform. What has changed?” Adams asked.
“It is only in name,” she quickly assured him. “After she dies, we can go back to being friends.”
“What is the difference? The fact is that I was once a man in uniform, and you despise the men in uniform. You keep running hot and cold on me. What has changed?”
Akinyi could not form an answer immediately. She did not want a man in uniform. No change there. She just wanted a temporary marriage that would appease her mother. She looked into Adams’ eyes and saw all the longing in them as he bathed her in his gaze. Then, she knew there would be nothing temporary about their marriage.
“Nothing has changed,” Akinyi stated and got off her seat. She was angry, but she did not know why. She had expected too much from him, just as she always did. She knew first-hand how too many expectations often lead to disappointment.
“Goodbye, Adams,” she said and felt tears forming in her eyes and turned sharply to leave.
At the door, Adams grabbed the knob before her. He saw the tears in her eyes, cursed under his breath and took her into his arms, holding her tightly.
Akinyi sobbed quietly into his shirt. After calming, she pulled away from him.
He tugged her back to him and crushed her mouth with his.
Confused, she took a while to respond to the kiss. He deepened the kiss, and she had no option but to respond with the same energy.
He explored her mouth with his tongue, groaning. Shivering, she put her hands around his neck and moved closer. He moaned deep in his throat, and her inner princess danced around the room, ululating triumphantly.
She had never been kissed with such passion and abandon. She broke the kiss, shifting so she could look into his eyes.
He stared at her and smiled before kissing her tears away. She felt warm with every kiss, and when he finally pressed his lips to her eyes so tenderly, she knew her time was up.
He cupped her face in his hands, looked deep into her eyes, and said, “Damn it, Akinyi! Don’t ever cry on me!”
He brushed her nose with his. They stayed that way for a while, their heartbeat and breathing the only sounds in the room.
“I cannot marry you in name only. I want you so much. The whole of you. I wonder what the men in uniform ever did to you, but I assure you I am different,” Adams said.
She saw the sincerity in his eyes, but David had also shown such sincerity and still broken her heart.
“I cannot take that chance,” she said, turning on her heels to leave.
It was dusk, so she rushed home before it became darker. She felt so alone, despair eating away at her. Feeling cold, she hugged her sweater closer to her body. When she finally got home, her head ached from thinking and deliberating.
She checked on her mother and found that she was still sleeping. The nurse informed her that she had eaten just ten minutes ago. Akinyi herself did not feel like eating. She took some painkillers and retired to bed.
***
After Akinyi had left, Adams felt a heaviness weighing so strong in his heart. He was tempted to follow her but resisted the urge.
Why did saying no to her request feel so wrong when it was the right call? He paced about the living room. He knew that he was hooked. He hadn’t planned on falling in love or whatever they call these strange feelings that engulf you and force you to bow to their will. But, with her, he wanted nothing less than to belong to her and her to him.
He sat down and tried to watch some news to get his mind off her, but it was pointless. Then it hit him that since he had turned down her offer of marriage, she would choose another man for the role.
Who knew, the arrangement might turn out to be permanent. Hence he would surely lose her for good. He shrugged and told himself that it didn’t matter. But deep down, he knew that he cared more than he dared admit to himself.
He pictured another man laying his hands on her—touching, kissing her and making love to her like he’d wanted since they first met. He bolted off the chair like it had become too hot. That could not be! He had to be the one doing all those things to her. He quickly looked at his watch and rushed to pick up his keys from the counter. He had to see her, and it could not wait until the next day.
When he arrived at her house, it was around 8pm. The maid opened the door for him. He went to see Akinyi’s mother in her room and found her wide awake. She looked at him disinterestedly as she drifted off to sleep. He sat on the stool next to the bed and held her thin, frail hands that were warm.
“I want to marry your daughter,” Adams said, surprising himself since the words were alien even to his ears, yet the voice was his. What had come over him? He had never felt this strange feeling that pushed him to do right by any woman not related to him by blood. Akinyi’s mother’s eyes flew open, and her face broke into a smile that made her face light up.
“Thank you, my son. Now I can rest in peace knowing that she is in safe hands,” she said and closed her eyes.
Adams went in search of Akinyi and found her fast asleep. He had intended to wake her and tell her the good news but changed his mind. She looked too peaceful to be disturbed. So he went to her, kissed her goodnight on the forehead and left.
***
The following day Akinyi woke up late, but she was still feeling very exhausted. She yawned, stretched, and got out of bed. She went to her mother’s room and found her awake already with a big smile plastered on her face.
“Mama, you are very bright today. That’s lovely,” Akinyi said jubilantly.
“Yes, my daughter. I have never been better,” her mother answered, her smile intriguing.
“What aren’t you telling me, Mama?” Akinyi asked, eyeing her suspiciously.
“Don’t lie to me. You already know,” her mother insisted.
“No. I would also be brimming with joy if I knew,” Akinyi said, the suspense killing her.
“Alright. The young man, Adams Okal, came to ask for your hand in marriage. That boy is God-sent, isn’t he?” her mother said.
Akinyi’s slight smile turned into a frown. What had made him change his mind? Last night he had been adamant about marrying her. She had really wanted him to say yes, but now that he had, she did not know what to feel.
“What’s wrong? I thought you would be jumping with joy by now,” her mother asked.
Akinyi smiled. “I am happy, Mama. It’s just that I didn’t expect him to say yes that fast.”
The news made her mother happy because it was what she really wanted. On the other hand, Akinyi had not planned on getting married in the foreseeable future. But she did not have a choice in the matter. It just had to be done.
She bathed her mother, and after feeding her, she left for Adam’s house. It was then that the news really dawned on her. Adams was going to be her husband. Even though it was in name only, she feared the unknown. If seeing him occasionally was too much to handle, how about staying with him under the same roof?
She walked to the front door timidly and rang the alarm. Mama Awino rushed to open the door and welcome her into the house. She asked about Awino and her baby before inquiring about Adams.
“He is in the study room,” the woman commented.
She went to the study, glancing at the other room, all spotlessly clean. She knocked on the door slightly before entering.
He sat at the desk, reading. Dressed in a blue shirt and a pair of black jeans, he looked handsome. He lifted his head, his brown eyes flicking over her, undressing her.
Adams thanked his lucky stars for bringing him to Kachieng. Akinyi was in a white floral dress clinging in all the right places. Her big eyes looked back at him defiantly. It was rare to find beauty and brains in a woman. He had been troubled all night that he had made a rash decision, but seeing her looking so beautiful in front of him, he knew she was meant for him. He closed his books and set them aside.
“Good morning, Jaber. Have a seat,” Adams said, extending his hand.
She took it, sitting beside him. There was a tense and awkward silence about the room.
“Akinyi, I came to your house last night and asked for your hand in marriage,” Adams said, resuming his seat. Akinyi forced her eyes to move from his lips to his eyes.
“Why the sudden change of heart? Is it out of pity?” Akinyi asked, trying to regain her composure. What was wrong with her? She didn’t know why being around him always made her have wayward thoughts.
And Adams chuckled before saying, “I feel many things for you, Akinyi, but pity is not one of them.”
Curiosity took the better part of her, and she asked, “What are these things that you feel for me, Adams?”
He liked how she called out his name, like a plea.
“Right now, I feel like taking you across my lap and kissing you senselessly.” He laughed loudly when he saw how Akinyi’s eyes widened in surprise.
“You are crazy, I swear,” she said, smiling.
“Maybe, but I am used to saying what is on my mind. I always get what I want, Akinyi, always.” Adams appraised her body until his eyes rested on hers.
She felt heat rising to her face and quickly looked away and murmured, “So domineering.”
He stood up from his seat, and all her senses became so alert. Was he going to act on his word? For a strange reason, Akinyi wished he would kiss her. But he strode purposefully to the home theatre radio occupying one corner of the room and switched on the music. Disappointment washed over Akinyi. He was such a tease.
The refined sound of Johnny Junior’s song of ‘Adongo’ filled the room. Then, he walked back to her and held out his hand. Akinyi blinked in surprise. This man was very unpredictable.
“I don’t know how to dance,” she whispered because she had lost her voice.
“I will lead, and you follow,” he explained, and she put her hand in his and stood up. He held the small of her back and pulled her to him, and they started swaying to the music.
She felt so tense being this close to him at the beginning. She felt his body heat permeating through his shirt to her skin. She looked up at him and found him smiling down at her. His bald head and his grown beards made him look dangerous and handsome. She lifted her right hand and gently caressed his beard, liking their coarse feel in her hands.
He closed his eyes and inhaled deeply. They were bright when he opened them, with purposeful light added to them. She knew then that she was playing with fire, and she would soon get burnt.
As the music went on, she relaxed and leaned her head at the crook of his neck, liking the smell of his skin and his beards tickling her cheeks. When he felt her breathing on his neck, he tightened his hold on her, and she felt so protected, so possessed, like she belonged to him. She wanted to remain like this forever and feel only him. True to his word, he was leading, and she would follow wherever he went.
He cupped her face in his hands, placed his lips on hers, and kissed her so slowly, gently, and deeply that she felt tears coming to her eyes. She had never felt such a profound connection with any man. Then, he pulled from the kiss, and she saw his eyes darken with something akin to lust. She wanted to look away but could not. She felt a tremor run through her.
“Are you cold?” he asked, running his hands up and down her arm. No, just feeling like taking this beyond the study room, she almost said but couldn’t find the courage to do so.
Akinyi pulled from his arms and sat down. “Let us make this marriage a temporary deal. Just until my mother … dies,” she said, almost afraid to spell out the last word.
Adams looked at her as if she had suddenly grown horns on her head.
“What? You thought it would be a permanent arrangement?” she asked.
“Not at all. Temporary is good enough but don’t you think it should be negotiable. For example, if you find that you love me after staying together, we can prolong it,” he inquired.
He wanted to make her so happy that she wouldn’t want to leave his side when her mother died. He was going to give it his all.
“I doubt whether I will ever fall in love again, Adams. Mine is a lost case,” she said in a wistful tone that pierced his heart.
“What did that man do to you? Not all men in uniform are dogs. Furthermore, remember, I have retired from the forces,” he pleaded for understanding.
She knew that there were men in the forces who were honourable, sensible, and responsible like Adams. All he had shown her was love and kindness, but the hurt had cut deep, leaving her slow to trust again. She was still walking around like some wounded animal, and she wondered just for a second if she was letting the past hurt and disappointments shadow the present. She wished she could wake up one day and realize that she had selective amnesia and could not remember the past hurts. She really wanted to give the present a shot. They said that time heals all wounds; she just hoped they would heal sooner.