The setting sun cast shadows upon the walls until it finally disappeared over the horizon. The apartment had become dark with only the light from a few electronics and a few stars outside to break up the black. Maddie didn’t notice. She lay on her couch in a mass of hurt, her body racked with sobs, as the scene of the end of their relationship played over and over in her mind. Why? Was it because she told him that she loved him? Was it too soon? Did he get scared? Maybe he didn’t love her in return. A fresh wave of tears started with that thought. He didn’t love her in return.
What was wrong with her that the man that she loved didn’t love her? How could she have read him so wrong? She was positive that she had been right. When she finally told him how she felt about him, he smiled and kissed her. She was so sure of his feelings that she thought that he would tell her that he loved her on their special date planned for that night.
She even dared to dream of more. She dared to dream of him proposing to her. She had been flying high in anticipation all day. She would have said “yes.” She knew that she wanted to marry him. She knew that her feelings were true and weren’t based on a crush from years ago. They were based on her getting to know Rick as he was now. He was a wonderful man who claimed her heart and stirred her blood like no man had ever done before.
Her feelings for Tom were a pale comparison. She thought that she knew what love was when she was with Tom. How wrong she was. Love was what she felt for Rick. Her feelings were so much stronger, so much deeper, so much everything. With Tom, she had doubts about her feelings, his feelings, them. But with Rick, she knew that he was the only man for her. It was like her soul found its mate in Rick. They were meant to be together. It always felt right.
Wrong again.
She cried herself to sleep on the couch that night. She woke in the same position, curled in a ball on the couch, when the door buzzer buzzed the next morning. It had to be Lisa. She said that she might stop by to pick up the little paint ladder that Maddie had borrowed and shoved into the back of her closet. Maddie stood up slowly and with care.
Her body ached, but her heart felt worse. The pale blue dress was a wrinkled mess. She looked at herself in the hall mirror by the door without much interest. Her hair was a rat’s nest, and her eyes were red, puffy, and ringed with smudged mascara. Other than that, her face was very pale.
Without bothering to check who was at the door, she pressed the buzzer to admit the person downstairs. It was just Lisa. As much as she wanted it to be Rick, she knew that he wouldn’t be coming to see her again. She heard the finality in his voice and words the night before.
While she waited for Lisa to reach her apartment, she started a pot of coffee then brushed her teeth and washed her face. The rest of her cleanup routine would have to wait because there was a knock at the door. She pulled it open without looking at who was in the hall and stepped back. She nearly jumped when Tom walked through the door. What was he doing in Iowa and at her apartment?
“Maddie? What happened to you? Are you ok?” He took hold of her arms as soon as he saw her. His handsome face looked worried as he examined her appearance. She felt nothing when she looked at him.
“I’m fine, Tom.” She pulled out of his hands and walked over to the coffee pot. After pouring a cup for herself, she looked at him to see if he wanted a cup. He nodded. He looked exactly the same. He was always dressed perfectly without a spot or a wrinkle in his expensive shirt and pants. Not a hair was out of place. He remained quiet during all of her actions as he waited for her to say something.
Once he had his cup, she walked into the living room and sat down. The worried expression on his face remained as he followed her. When he sat in the chair, she said, “I didn’t know that you would be in town. Why are you here? I’m sorry, that was kind of rude.”
“It’s ok. Maddie, what happened to you? You look like you’ve been crying. Are you hurt?”
“I told you that I’m fine. I had some distressing news last night. That’s all.” She really did not want to talk about Rick with Tom of all people. “Tom, why are you here?”
“Can’t I see my best girl? I’ve finished law school and am moving back to start with Kramer, Wilson, and Hewitt after Labor Day. You know who they are?” He looked proud and puffed his chest out when he said the name of the law firm. Everyone who had a television set or read the newspaper knew that the law firm was a big one in Cedar Rapids. Their ads were everywhere, and articles about their win records hit the press regularly. Good for Tom that he was starting there. What did that have to do with her?
“I’ve heard of them. I’m happy for you. You talked about joining them years ago.” She took a sip of her coffee then looked at him again in confusion. “Tom, why are you here?”
He put his cup on the table then got on one knee in front of her. She backed up on the couch. What was he doing?
“Maddie, my sweet Maddie. I know that I told you that we should see other people while I was gone. I never got over you, though. None of the women that I dated could compare to you. I want you back, Maddie. I want to marry you. I know that now. I know that I’m going fast here. I can see by your expression that you think so, too. I can’t help it. I love you.”
What was he talking about? She knew that she was looking at him with complete disbelief written all over her face, but she couldn’t help it. Before she could say anything, he started talking again.
“We broke up before I left. That was my fault. I wasn’t ready to get married then, but I’m ready to get married now. It would be a good, sound move to get married now. A man in my position needs a wife. You’re that woman, Maddie. You’re the only woman that I can see in that position. I love you, and I want to marry you.” He grabbed her hands and squeezed them encouragingly.
It was surreal having him in her living room again after so much time had passed, and proposing to her! Maddie could not have been more shocked by his words and actions. An alien could have walked through her balcony door and told her that he was taking her to his home planet, and it wouldn’t have shocked her as much as Tom’s proposal shocked her. An image of Charlie the Alien posed on his knees in front of her as he asked her to marry him flashed through her mind. She felt a giggle coming and stopped it before it could escape. Before another one could form, she pulled her hands from his and stood up.
At a total loss for words, she turned around and walked into the kitchen. He followed her. When she saw him behind her, she turned and held out her arm to stop him from taking her in his arms. “Tom, you’re already engaged. Remember?”
“I called it off. I realized that I wanted you. Maddie, I was a fool for breaking up with you. But I’m back now. We can get married just like you always wanted.” As she looked at him, she realized just what a fool she had been for wasting any of her time on him. The only thing that she wanted from him now was for him to leave.
“I can’t marry you, Tom. I won’t marry you.”
“Of course you can, sweetie. You love me. Remember how we were? We were great together in college. We would be great together again.” He smiled his best, beguiling, lawyer smile. It was the smile that he used when he wanted to sway someone around to his way of thinking. It usually worked with people, but not with her and not that day. When she shook her head and told him “no” again, he looked at her indulgently. “Right now you’re confused. I get it. We haven’t seen each other in two years. But we’ve talked on the phone.”
“That’s because you called me. I didn’t call you.”
“What does it matter who called whom? The point is that we love each other, and now that I’m back, we can get married like you wanted to before.” He took her arms in his hands, and she had to step away again and put her hand up between their bodies to keep him away.
“Tom, I don’t want to marry you. I don’t love you. I thought I did years ago, but I don’t. You don’t love me, either. Not really. We’re too different. We want different things. You won’t make me happy, and I know that I won’t make you happy.”
“Maddie, this isn’t about Davidson, is it? Jason said that he had seen you out a few times with Rick Davidson. He’s...”
“Leave Rick out of this,” she interrupted him. “He has nothing to do with you and me. I don’t love you, Tom.”
“Just give us a chance, Maddie. I came on too strong in asking you right away when we hadn’t seen each other after so long. I was overly anxious. Give it some time. Let it sink in. We can go out like we used to. You’d like that. We could visit some of those old places that we used to go to. I know...we could visit Galena. You always wanted me to go with you. We could go later today or tomorrow.”
He tried putting his arms around her again, and when she stepped away, he backed her into the refrigerator.
“Or we could just stay right here, baby. You and I could spend the weekend right here and become reacquainted. I’ll make you forget all about the loser. I’ll show you just how good we will be together. I heard that you became a little wild, a little dirty. If you married me, we could do it any way you want it. What do you say?”
He began to kiss her neck, and she tried to push him away. He didn’t budge. His arms were like steel bands, unmovable as they rested against the refrigerator door and pinned her in.
She felt something for him then, all right. It was anger plain and simple for the insults to both her and Rick. She tried pushing him away again and telling him “no.” He didn’t get the message. But she wasn’t raised with four brothers for nothing. They had taught her how to defend herself from unwanted advances. After she tried one more time without any results, she went for the vulnerable spot between his legs. With a quick knee jab to his groin, she dropped him, and he fell quickly. While he struggled to overcome the pain, she walked to the door.
“I said ‘no’. I won’t marry you, Tom, and I’m not interested in a relationship, either. You wasted your time in coming here. There’s someone else out there for you, but she’s not me. Now, I want you to leave.” She opened the door and waited. She hoped that he didn’t try anything else. He glared at her and stood up. Then he smoothed his hands down over his shirt and limped over to the door.
“Alright, Maddie. Go spend your time with Davidson. Have your fling with him. Once he’s dragged you down to his level, you’ll want me back again. But don’t expect me to make a fool of myself a second time. Next time, you will need to come to me, and you will, too, when you see that he’s nothing but a blue-collar loser, nothing but a nut job. You’ll be begging me to take you back. I’ll be waiting for your call. Have a good day.”
With as much pride as he could muster, he lifted his chin, straightened his back, and walked out. Maddie closed the door and rested her forehead against the wood surface for a minute while she caught her breath and collected her thoughts. What could possibly happen next?
“When it rains, it pours.”
* * * * *
“Ok, so let me get this straight. Rick comes over last night for your date then tells you that it’s going too fast, that he only wanted sex, and breaks it off?” Kathy shook her head in amazement. “What a dope. Something must have spooked him.”
“I don’t know what,” Mary said as she poured another round of coffee for everyone. Lisa came over right after Tom left, took one look at Maddie’s face then called Kathy Davidson. Kathy, in turn, called Mary. Before Maddie knew it, she had an apartment full of women who wanted a blow-by-blow account of last night’s event so that they could plan their next move.
She already knew that Kathy and Mary wanted hers and Rick’s relationship to succeed. But she was surprised to find out just how much Kathy, Mary, and Lisa were involved in orchestrating her relationship with Rick in the early stages. Lisa had arranged the blind date with Rick because she knew that Maddie would want to see him again and brought the red dress over in hopes that a mishap would occur on the date. Maddie wasn’t sure if she liked all of the interference, but at that point she would take any help that she could get to find out what happened.
“Donnie told me last night that Rick came into the shop yesterday morning and asked Joe and him for the name of a jeweler. That doesn’t sound like something a man would do if he planned on breaking up with a woman. Rick isn’t the parting gift kind of guy. He also told them not to come around this weekend, that he had plans. Something happened between yesterday morning and last evening.”
“I know what spooked him,” Maddie said in a small voice from her place on the middle of the couch. Her eyes began to water again, and Lisa handed her a tissue. “I told him that I loved him. That’s what spooked him. He doesn’t love me back.”
“Nonsense,” Lisa said from her spot next to Maddie.
“Having a woman tell a man that she loved him would only scare him off if he didn’t love her in return.” Kathy spoke again. “That man loves you so much, it’s ridiculous. No, he was planning on asking you to marry him. I know it.”
“You don’t think that he was afraid to tell Maddie the truth, do you?” Mary asked Kathy. Maddie and Lisa looked at the two of them in confusion. What were they talking about?
“I don’t know.” Kathy moved to the side of the couch, on the other side of Maddie, and sat down. “Maddie, what has Rick told you, if anything, about himself other than the obvious? Did he tell you about his drinking problem after the injury and about suffering from PTSD? Do you know about his nightmares?”
“Yes, he told me. I know all about them. He doesn’t drink anymore, and I was with him when he had a nightmare. He’s had a few PTSD episodes, but they weren’t major. Rick said that the nightmares and episodes occur less frequently and are less severe. Carlos even asked Rick to come with him to talk to other vets about getting help. He thought that Rick would be a good inspiration to other veterans who are suffering from the same things.”
“Then those can’t be what scared him off,” Lisa said. “I don’t get it.”
“I told you that he realized that he doesn’t love me and wanted to end it as quickly and as painlessly as possible.” Fresh tears started, and she quickly wiped them away. “I know that you want to help, but perhaps the best thing to do is to not interfere anymore. If Rick really does love me, then he’ll come around eventually. If he doesn’t, then I’ll have to accept that. I’ll just have to move forward with my life.” She stumbled over the last part and bit her lip to stop it from quivering.
“Don’t be melodramatic, Maddie,” Lisa told her. “I wonder if it has anything to do with Kevin and Tom being back in town. I saw Kevin at your parents’ house this morning, and you said that Tom came by before I got here to ask you to marry him.”
“Wait a sec. You didn’t tell us that.” Mary jumped in. “Tom was here this morning and asked you to marry him? What a rat! You two don’t see each other for two years after he dumps you, then he decides to ask you to marry him? What, did he think that you were just sitting around for the last few years waiting for him to come to his senses?”
“Who’s Tom?”
“Ex-boyfriend from college,” Lisa supplied Kathy with the information. “I bet he heard that your father was appointed as the dean. I bet that’s why he’s suddenly back asking for your hand. I always thought that he was a bit of a suck-up.”
“He told me that he’s starting at Kramer, Wilson, and Hewitt and needed a wife now. It would be good for his position in the company,” Maddie told them.
“That makes him a double rat,” Mary said and drew a laugh from everyone. “He’s a rat on steroids.”
“I wonder if Rick ran into Kevin or Tom yesterday,” Kathy said with contemplation. She stood up and began to pace the small living room. “Have you tried to call him today?” She directed her question to Maddie, who shook her head. “Ok, we’ll leave him alone for the weekend to stew in his own juices. You might want to find out if Kevin is involved in this. Next week, Mary and I will make a little visit to the lake to see how Rick is doing. But my guess is that by the end of the weekend, Rick will have come to his senses and will be back begging for your forgiveness.”
“And if he doesn’t?” Maddie asked with a glimmer of hope forming in her heart.
“If he doesn’t, well, then Mary and I will get to the bottom of this. That man can be stubborn, but he’s no match for Mary and me when we’re on a mission. Don’t worry, Maddie. I have a feeling that you and Rick have only hit a speed bump. It happens with every relationship. If the two of you are meant to be together, then you’ll get past it.”
“If we’re not?”
“Don’t think that way until all hope is lost.” Kathy sat back down next to Maddie again and put her arm around her shoulders. “Hang in there, girl. Hang in there.”