After my call from Lydia, Marshall and I glued ourselves to the TV like a pair of slugs on a stick, too lazy to make a move. And then, simultaneously as if it was planned, both of our cell phones sounded. I already knew who my caller would be and took my time, but I heard Marshall say, “Hey, Nate, what’s up?” before I answered my call.
“Phee! Herb’s over here. It’s a good thing we didn’t get into our sleepwear yet. Not that it would matter. All of us have those long terry-cloth robes that are more blanket than robe, but—”
“Mom! Enough with the robes. Please don’t tell me you called to let me know Herb stopped by.”
“No. I wanted to let you know why he stopped by. They just evacuated Lizard Acres and the bowling alley. We heard a number of sirens but we hear them all the time. Too many speeders on RH Johnson and Grand. Anyway, Kenny called Herb from the bowling alley. What a disaster!”
“What disaster? A fire?”
“No. Worse. Lizards.”
“I don’t think I heard you clearly. Marshall’s speaking on his phone and he’s right next to me.”
“I said lizards. L I Z A R D S. Lizards.”
“I still don’t understand.”
“No one knows exactly what happened, but when they opened Lizard Acres this evening, the place was crawling with lizards. On the bar. On the tables. On the floor. And in Nomos Bistro, too. Of course, the bistro was closed since it’s not open at night, but the cleaners got a shock when they went in. Lizards everywhere.”
I looked at Marshall but he was too occupied with Nate’s call.
“Are you listening, Phee?” The annoyance in my mother’s tone was hard to miss.
“I’m just stunned, that’s all.”
“Kenny said there were all kinds of small lizards. They’ve got the fire crew over there, along with members of the Arizona Herpetological Society who will help catch and release them.”
Just then I heard Marshall say, “What? Crickets? Didn’t think they were around this time of year—Pause—Oh, pet shops. Got it.”
Then, everything jelled at once as Marshall continued his conversation with Nate. “Why do they need us? We don’t have any experience catching those things—Pause—Source of origin? I understand. Okay, I’ll meet you in front of the bowling alley. It’ll be priceless to see the look on Bowman and Ranston’s faces.”
“Let me call you back, Mom. I’ll just be a minute.” Before she could answer, I ended the call. A practice I was getting pretty good at, I might add.
Marshall and I tripped over each other’s words as we both conveyed the same thing to one another—someone let a bunch of crickets loose in the bowling alley complex and added to the fiasco by dumping a boatload of small lizards as well.
“Sounds like your mother heard about it, too, huh?”
“Yeah, she’s got a front-row seat, plus ‘breaking news’ from Herb via Kenny. Tell me the real version.”
“It’s chaos over there. Not dangerous, just creepy and annoying. Oh, and it will involve the health department, too. The deputies need Nate and me to check with local pet stores regarding purchases of crickets and lizards. The stores are open until nine so we need to hustle. The fire department and the herpetological volunteers are gathering up the reptiles.”
“What about the crickets?”
“Who knows? Maybe they’ll open a door and let them scoot out. Of course, I imagine many of them were already dinner for the lizards.”
“Ew. I don’t want to think about it.”
“Please tell me that your mother doesn’t intend to go over there.”
“She didn’t say, but I doubt it. I mean, they evacuated the building. Can’t very well bend everyone’s ear at night in the cold February air. My bet is that more book club ladies show up at her house for an extended sleepover and marathon gossip fest. It’ll be a first, that’s for sure.”
Marshall stood, grabbed his jacket from the closet and returned to give me a kiss. “I’ll keep you posted.”
“Do they think it was a prank?”
He shook his head. “No. Given the fact that quite a few people observed the verbal altercation between Harris and Jonesy, the deputies believe Harris might have been behind this crawling nightmare. Plus, it cost the bar quite a bit of business, not to mention the bowling alley. To make matters worse, everything will be locked down tomorrow until they get an all-clear from the county health department. Keep in mind, those lizards pee and poop, too!”
“Thanks. I hadn’t thought about that, but now it will be impossible to get that out of my mind.”
Marshall laughed, gave me another kiss and raced out the door. It was past ten when he returned, exhausted and hungry.
“I know more about feeding reptiles than I ever thought imaginable. Nate and I divvied up the list and went to all of the stores, including PetSmart, Petco, Pet Market and Pratts. Not to mention EJ’s Reptiles.”
“And?”
“Lots of grasshopper and cricket purchases but all were cash and no one seemed to remember who did the buying. No significant reptile purchases. The chain stores are forwarding their surveillance videos to MCSO, so I guess Bowman and Ranston can have some fun with that. Meanwhile, I’m starving. Any good leftovers? Or junk food? Or anything?”
“Lots of yogurt, granola, and cereal. Also leftover deli ham and cheese. Come on, I’ll make you a sandwich.”
It was eleven thirty by the time we crept into bed and I wondered if indeed Harris had sabotaged Lizard Acres to strongarm Jonesy. If that was the case, then he didn’t count on the owner and cook at Nomos. Martha McMillan took over the bistro that she and her late husband owned a number of years ago. A no-nonsense former line server, she built the bistro up by catering to the bowling crowd. Given what I’d heard about her from the book club ladies, she wouldn’t take well to a setup caused by unwelcome crickets and lizards.
“What’s your take on this mess?” I asked Marshall before I turned off the lamp on my bedstand.
“If not Harris, someone sent Lizard Acres and the bowling alley a message. Let’s hope that’s all it turns out to be.”
“For once, I agree with Bowman and Ranston. Gee, that’s scary. Anyway, New Media Entertainment is the only enterprise I can think of.”
“Unless it’s personal. And if so, someone discovered a new scapegoat. Get some shuteye, hon. You’ll need it. I have a feeling that things are going to escalate. Especially with that sit-in.”
“Aargh. Don’t remind me. That’s the stuff that’ll make me toss and turn all night.”
“Join the club.”
• • •
Augusta couldn’t keep a straight face the next morning when all of us told her about the lizards and crickets at the bowling complex. The consensus from our guys and the deputies was that Harris wanted to deliver a clear message to the folks who ran the establishments there—“New Media Entertainment is about to change everything! Like it or leave it.”
And while Harris was brought in for questioning at MCSO, our guys focused on their ongoing cases as well as uncovering more details about Orlando. By late afternoon, having chatted with the guy’s neighbors, they uncovered a tidbit of information that promised to change the trajectory of the investigation. Namely, about Sherrille Wainwright, Harris’s wife. The woman was presumed to be having an affair with Orlando. And not only did the neighbors mention it, a former waitress at Nomos by the name of Doris told Nate about it as well.
“It was serendipitous really,” Nate said when he and Marshall returned to the office at a little past four. “Doris, who goes by Dot, is a friend of the widow who lives across the street from our victim. She was there when we knocked on that lady’s door. As soon as she heard why we were there, she opened up like a cooked clam.”
“It’s a regular Peyton Place over there, isn’t it?” Augusta waited for me to finish getting my coffee before she approached the Keurig for her usual late afternoon “energizer.”
I glanced at Nate and then Marshall. “What did Doris say? Does she think Sherrille killed her lover?” Oh my gosh. This is straight out of my mother’s mouth.
“Whoa, slow down, kiddo. We can’t really ascertain that they were romantically involved. It’s still hearsay. Believable hearsay, but hearsay nonetheless.”
“It gives us another motive to point the finger at Harris,” Marshall said. “Not only business, but now, personal.”
Just then, the phone rang and Augusta picked up the call. “Hold on a minute. Mr. Williams is right here.” Then she mouthed to Nate and Marshall, “Ranston.”
I held still, along with everyone else, waiting for a new shoe to drop. Thankfully, it didn’t, but this case was just getting started.
“One mystery solved,” Nate announced. “It seems someone broke into the small lizard breeding sanctuary at the Arizona Herpetological Sanctuary in Scottsdale on Tuesday evening and made off with coolers full of the reptiles. The volunteers and workers who showed up at Lizard Acres had no idea it was their lizards. None of them worked in that part of their building so they were clueless.”
Augusta furrowed her brow. “You mean to say no one realized they were missing until yesterday? Back on the dairy farm, we’d notice if the eggs were gone in the chicken coop. Hmm, they probably had their faces glued to their phones.”
“If it was Harris,” I said, “I wonder how he’d know about those lizards.”
“I’ll tell you how he’d know.” Augusta couldn’t wait to spout off. “It was on channel 3 last week—fun places to take the family during midwinter break. Kids love those slimy, crawly things.”
“Apparently, so did our perpetrator.” I rolled my eyes. “Now what?”
“The usual. Forensics at the sanctuary and in the bowling complex. Interviews ad nauseum and the deputies latching on to Harris as our guy.” Marshall stretched his shoulders back and half-heartedly shrugged.
“What about the evidence? Reliable evidence?”
“They’ll find it,” Nate said, “or they’ll make a darn good stab at it.”