| |
The calm before a storm should mean nothing. It is literally nothing, but it somehow has the power to pull the deepest thoughts and emotions from the human heart.
-Musings of the Historian
––––––––
I LAY ON MY BACK WATCHING the stars above me. It was a moonless night and the stars lit the ebony sky, burning in their own silent infernos. I heard a rustle in the grass next to me. It was Sadavir.
"Can't you sleep?" I asked as he sat down next to me.
He shook his head and smiled.
"Walking over here I passed seven other men. I have yet to see anyone sleeping tonight." He fell silent for a moment before he spoke his next question.
"Uncle, have you seen war before?"
I nodded, my eyes still on the stars.
"I'm afraid," he admitted openly. I turned my head to look at him.
"You've already seen a fair bit of battle yourself, Sadavir, surely you've gotten used to it a bit. Dealing with larger numbers actually isn't all that different than dealing with small numbers. It's all about position."
"It's not that. I have my armbands, and I have my Stone. This is what my life was supposed to mean. I do not fear for myself, but what of my father? What of my mother? What of..." His voice trailed off and I heard the name he never spoke. He resumed without finishing his last sentence.
"How will I be able to protect them? They have no black Stone, they have no armbands. How will I be able to concentrate on what I have to do when I'm looking around to see if they're all right? What if I fail them? What if they die?"
"Sadavir," I began, choosing my words carefully. "You might fail them."
His eyes raised to the stars. Even in the dark, I could see the tears form in the corners of his eyes. I continued.
"But there have been a thousand times I have seen you where you might have failed them. You haven't let them down yet. They are proud of what you've become.
"The possibility of failure is very real. It haunts all thinking beings. You will always live with that fear, everyone does. But will that fear stop you from trying?
"When we were in that dungeon under Saddhan's house, you depended on Aric to dig you out and Olya to heal you. What if they had failed you?"
"But they wouldn't have," his voice was insistent, as if he were a little offended at the thought.
"Why not? They are human, they could have failed."
"I don't know why. They wouldn't have failed, they would have made sure it worked out some way or another. I just know it."
"How do you know it?" I pressed.
"I don't know," he reiterated.
"Yes, you do. You just aren't saying it. The answer is right in front of you."
He thought for a moment, then smiled, his eyes dropping to his armbands.
"Was that a joke, Uncle? I don't think I've ever heard you tell a joke. I see what you're saying, though. You're saying that they wouldn't have failed me because they love me?"
I nodded, barely visible in the darkness.
"So are you saying that I won't fail them because I love them?"
"The answer is right in front of you," I repeated. "You won't let yourself fail."
"Thanks. How did you become so wise?" he asked with childlike curiosity.
"Because I'm old, boy. Now go to bed."
"Sure, maybe I can sleep a little," Sadavir said and slipped noiselessly back into the night. I waited a moment after he left, studying the stars.
"You can come out now, Olya," I spoke into the night. I was answered by more footsteps, these much quieter.
"I didn't want to interrupt you. I didn't know you saw me," Olya whispered as she lowered herself down to the ground in the very spot Sadavir had sat only a moment before.
"I heard a twig snap in the bushes as Sadavir was getting up to leave. The only other person who would be coming to talk to me is Aric, and that man moves about as quietly as a falling tree."
"You certainly seem to be in high spirits, Uncle. Doesn't it bother you that men might die tomorrow, or even tonight, if they get through the gate?"
"I don't think that they will try a night attack, their advantage depends on good lighting.
"As for my feelings, I am no more anxious to see anyone die than you are. But the deaths of men aren't what interests me, it's their lives, their stories. Tomorrow will be a defining moment for thousands of lives, both present and future, whatever the outcome may be."
"You are a strange one, Uncle."
I smiled in the darkness.
"I've been hearing that a lot lately," I responded.
"What do you think of Andre's plan?"
"I think it shows a great deal of cunning. I don't think anyone but Andre could have realized the potential of the Stones so fast."
"I don't like it," she blurted out.
I raised an eyebrow.
"And what is it you don't like about the plan?"
"Don't you think it depends too much on one man?"
"You mean Sadavir?" I asked.
"Yes," Olya said, exasperated. "What if something happens to him? The whole plan would fail."
"So you're afraid of what will happen if the plan fails? Worried for your people?" I turned away so that she wouldn't see my smile.
"Well, no," she admitted. "I mean yes! I mean, of course, I'm worried about my people, I've seen what those weapons can do. It's just that..." Her voice trailed off.
"Don't worry, even if Sadavir gets killed, we'll figure out some way of stopping them."
"I know, I know, but I don't want..." She stopped as her voice started to crack.
"You don't want Sadavir to die," I finished for her, rolling back over to face her.
She nodded, not trusting her voice.
"I understand, little one. And you should know that he loves you too. As for your fears, I only have one piece of advice. There is a small voice inside you that tells you that the sun rises in Sadavir's eyes and that he can do anything. All women in love hear that voice. It's not reason, it's not even true, but you need to listen to that voice tonight."
"Thanks, Uncle. I'll try," Olya said, standing. I smiled at the stars; they seemed to laugh with me.
"You should get some sleep too," I said out loud once Olya was out of hearing range.
"Silent as a falling tree, eh? I should kick you where you lay, you conniver. It would serve you right."
Aric's large shadowy form separated itself from a large rock and he walked away. He only paused once.
"Will it all be all right, Amar? You seem to know something we don't." Aric's voice was low, but it carried well in the still night air.
"All I can promise is that the sun will rise tomorrow. And that is enough."
Aric chuckled softly.
"More than twenty years you have lived and worked with my family, Amar. I don't think I've got a straight answer from you yet."
"Maybe you just didn't ask the right questions, Aric."
I could see his head shake.
"Good night, Amar."
"Good night, Aric."