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Is there any more beautiful sight than Cobain standing on the beach in his black trunks, his olive skin darkened by the sun, and his thick hair flowing in the cool breeze? Why, yes, there is. Him standing there while holding his toddler daughter.
A part of me knew Cobain was mine as soon as he stormed toward us that first day. Under my desire for his good looks and admiration for his talent, I felt he was a man I could never give up. Fortunately, he can’t get enough of me either.
Bahira is a child perfectly designed for a man like Cobain. He can’t stand screaming, and she’s very quiet. When he gets irritable with her, she thinks he’s funny and laughs.
While her hair lightens over time to a chestnut brown like mine, her dark eyes are all Cobain. They watch me in the same intense way that his do too. Unlike her papa, she’ll smile to soften up her penetrating gaze.
Tall for her age, Bahira adores swimming like her cousin, Ani. The girls are fast friends, spending days playing on the beach, in the pool, or with Mama and their dollhouse.
As much as I adore my baby girl, I hated pregnancy. I didn’t own my body, feeling out of control for the entire nine months. It’s the closest I come to knowing how Mama and Sunny felt when they were the property of others.
Being powerless—and dangerously moody—isn’t something I want to do again. My new birth control holds strong, allowing Cobain and me to focus on our daughter and family.
Despite witnessing my wild behavior for those nine months, Sunny is inspired to try motherhood.
“No matter how scared or upset you got, everyone helped you,” she says a few weeks after Bahira is born. “I think I could do it with a family around me. Besides, Ani keeps asking if I have a baby in my tummy.”
“She won’t be much older than Kai was when Mama had me. I grew up with him showing me the world,” I say and smile at him nearby.
I can never thank my brother enough for his desire to travel to the United States. Without his restless spirit, Cobain would still be alone in that house. Robin’s last year of life would have been cold and lonely. No one would have ever cared for them. I can’t bear to think of Cobain back there. He’s the part of me I didn’t realize I was missing.
Cobain isn’t quite the same man who appeared from under a tarp and gunned down the cultists with his big gun. For one thing, he’s a better lover these days. He takes his time now that he realizes I’m not going anywhere. My pleasure matters more to him, and sex is no longer an outlet for his frustrations. He actually has fun in bed.
I sure as hell do too. The man never loses his sexiness. Some women might be bored at the thought of only a single lover for their entire life, but I hit the jackpot with such a wild one. Before my trip to the United States, I viewed romance as a business arrangement between two people. Manuel suited me on paper, so I figured he would make me happy. Yet I craved what my parents shared. Falling for Cobain was never a choice. Once I saw him, I couldn’t look away.
Since the trip, though, I’ve lost my taste for danger. I still carry my weapons, and I’ll drop any threat, but I can’t go looking for adventure anymore.
My only work away from home is real estate related. While my family doesn’t really need the money, my father raised us to stash extra cash away for a rainy day.
Cobain joins me when I show properties to foreigners. He isn’t necessary, of course, but I do love having a sexy bodyguard. He strikes such an imposing figure too, dressed all in black despite the hot weather. After the showings, Cobain and I spend time alone in town. One of his favorite activities is to walk through the outdoor markets, picking fruits and flowers for me.
In those unguarded moments, I think about the life he lived before we met. I’ve pieced together much of his past. Cobain still doesn’t tell me anything substantial, but I’ve gotten enough hints to understand why he fears children, distrusts women, and assumes all men are predators.
As much as his past haunts him, Cobain eventually adjusts to his new circumstances.
Years ago, something happened to make him feel guilty over a child’s death. That’s why he chose to keep Ani at arm’s length. Yet he now spends most of his time watching over his daughter, nieces, and nephew.
In his youth, Cobain was wronged by his mother and Priscilla. Yet he trusts my heart will never allow me to hurt him. With the exception of when pregnancy hormones overtook my brain.
As for evil men, he’s seen more than his share. But he also grows closer to Papa and Kai. During their fishing excursions, they talk business, women, kids, and no doubt topics I don’t want to know about. Unlike with Nilsson and DeMarco, Cobain understands how my father and brother are his family and will never betray him.
The James clan might not be the friendliest people, and we have our share of oddities. Yet once someone is welcomed into our family, we’ll protect and cherish them fiercely. Cobain finally has a home and people to call his own.
