EIGHT

The stars were very bright and more numerous than Vandien had ever seen. His head was pillowed on a bundled quilt and the earth beneath him was warm. Satisfaction flowed through him as comfortingly as his own blood. He listened to the crackling of the fire and the horses’ teeth grinding the rough dry grass. Laundry draped on the low-growing bushes made friendly ghosts in the night.

Ki’s silhouette came between him and the firelight. ‘It was stupid,’ she informed him. Her knees cracked as she squatted down beside him. He took her mug of tea and stole a sip from it.

‘Necessary.’ He felt too lazy to even make complete sentences. The long tension of the day had taken its toll. Now that it was finally eased, he felt both incredibly sleepy and very smug. Too smug to trade words with Ki. Besides, the argument was already old.

‘Stupid. If I hadn’t stopped and pretended to be taking a stone out of Sigmund’s hoof, you would never have caught up with us. Dragging him like a sack of potatoes. You couldn’t have attracted more attention if you’d been blowing a horn.’

‘A diversion,’ he said lazily. ‘Carefully planned. The Brurjans at the gate were too busy asking me why the boy was unconscious to wonder what might be inside the wagon. No smuggler in his right mind would go out of the gate like that.’

‘Hmm.’ Ki sipped at her mug. ‘I put a poultice of cold tea leaves on it, but his face is going to be purple. We’ll be lucky if the bruises fade before we get to Villena.’

‘I’m truly distressed to hear that,’ Vandien said laconically.

‘You should be. What if he had come to at the gate and made good on his threats? Or what if a patrol stops us again? He’s still furious. He’s full of low names for you. He must have told me two dozens times that you were going to be very sorry you’d treated him that way. I was glad to get out of the wagon and leave him there. You should see his jaw. It’s a wonder he can talk at all.’

‘Breaks my heart.’ Vandien smiled briefly. ‘I knew he wasn’t going to come to at the gate.’ He made a show of massaging his knuckles.

‘You get that much satisfaction out of hitting a little boy?’ Ki asked acidly.

Vandien wasn’t fooled. ‘More. Infinitely more. You can’t imagine how good it felt.’

‘I’m ashamed to say, I can,’ she admitted with a small smile. She settled comfortably beside him.

‘Willow’s asleep?’ Vandien asked after a moment.

Ki nodded to the dark. ‘Under the wagon. I think she’s exhausted from the tension, and couldn’t stay awake any longer, no matter what she believes about Goat.’ Her voice faded into the silence between them.

‘And what do you believe?’ Vandien finally asked her.

‘I don’t know,’ Ki admitted. ‘I haven’t been sleeping too well since we took on Goat, but my waking hours haven’t been pleasant, either. That girl said she’d dreamed of him?’

‘Yes.’ A more serious look came over his face. ‘I think that’s what upset me the most. Not a boy and girl in the straw, but the deception he used to get her there. The lack of honor.’

‘Honor is so important?’

His dark eyes pinned hers. ‘Yes. A man’s honor is what he is.’

Neither spoke for a long time. Ki sat up, arranged the quilts and Vandien’s arm more to her liking, and settled into them again, pillowing her head on his shoulder and upper chest. She spoke softly. ‘I like the sound of your heart beating.’

‘Me, too. I’d be very annoyed if it stopped. Ki, what do you believe about Goat?’

She sighed, and he knew she didn’t want to talk about it. But she would. ‘Everything, and nothing,’ she said. ‘Yesterday, and this morning, he was like a different boy. Helpful, kind. But this afternoon …’ She paused, took a breath. ‘I suppose I believe that we should be careful. Knowing that he might be capable of such a thing negates it, doesn’t it? It’s kind of like finding out a man’s a liar. He doesn’t deceive you easily after that. I won’t be swayed by anything I dream.’

‘But you aren’t going to give up sleeping?’ Vandien filled in.

‘Oh, I’ll sleep, all right.’ Ki lifted her head, slowly scanned the camp. Willow was a motionless huddle under the wagon, and the door of the cuddy was shut as tight as Goat could slam it. She ducked her head and brushed her lips down Vandien’s face to his ear. ‘I’ll sleep if there’s nothing better to do.’

‘Um.’ He settled more comfortably. ‘You’re warm. Feels good on my ribs. Well. So, what are we going to do after we drop Goat in Villena?’

She lifted her mouth from his neck. ‘If you’re too tired, just say so.’

‘I’m not too tired. I just enjoy being persuaded. And it brought to mind what I heard in town today. About a week from now, there’s going to be a festival in Tekum. The Duke will be there, with all his retainers, and there will be jugglers and street musicians and wrestling on the village green …’

‘And so?’ Ki asked, loosening the lacing of his shirt.

‘And so I thought we might want to stay and enjoy it.’

‘Not a good idea,’ Ki said decisively. ‘Does this tickle?’

‘Not exactly, but it’s nice. Why not the festival?’

Ki paused to answer him. ‘Timing’s all wrong. We should be nearly to Villena by then. Because the Duke will be there, and if the Duke will be there, then his Brurjans will be there, and if the Brurjans are there, then we don’t want to be there.’

‘But we’d be part of a crowd, hardly noticeable in the throng. There’d be a lot to see and do, and maybe we could pick up some freighting that will take us out of Loveran. Even if we don’t, the man who issued our papers today said that Tekum boasts a number of good swordsmen, and that the Duke always offers a purse for the … hey! Be careful of my ribs, will you?’

‘I hate this damn belt buckle. Next town we come to, I’m buying you a different one.’

‘It works fine if one doesn’t get in a rush about it, Ki.’ His hands moved lazily to her assitance. ‘But you could buy me a new one at the Duke’s festival in Tekum if you want. Staying for it would delay us a few days at most.’

‘Delays are one thing that I have no tolerance for,’ Ki said pointedly.

‘And you say I’m impatient and impulsive.’ He sighed theatrically as he reached for her.

Ki awoke to darkness. Vandien’s elbow was in her ribs; sleepily she shifted away from it and resettled herself in the quilts. Then she heard again the sound that had wakened her. Willow drew another shuddering breath, sniffed again. For long moments Ki listened to her weeping, trying to imagine what could be wrong with her. At last she rose and went to her. The dry earth was warm beneath her bare feet. She crouched by the wagon, gripping a spoke of one of the wagon’s wheels. ‘Willow?’ she whispered gently.

The prone figure of the girl twitched. She buried her face deeper into her crossed arms. ‘Go away,’ she said in a small, muffled voice.

‘All right, if that’s what you want.’ Ki knew that some kinds of grief did not bear sharing. But others did. ‘I’ll go away, Willow. But if you change your mind and want to talk to someone, or just have someone sit up with you, let me know. I’m not hard to wake.’

Willow took in a gasping breath and suddenly lifted her face to stare at Ki. In the deep shadows under the wagon, her eyes were two smudges in her pale face. ‘That’s wonderful.’ She spat out the words. ‘Now you’d like to listen to me. Now, when it’s too late! Well, there’s nothing to tell you, Ki. Nothing’s left. Unless you want to hear about a bad dream I had. Unless you want to share my nightmare with me!’ The last she all but shrieked at Ki. Ki stood and backed stiff-legged from the wagon, repulsed not so much by Willow’s words, but by the low chuckle that echoed them; a laugh she would swear came from within her wagon.

She sensed Vandien’s wakefulness even before she touched him. She snugged her body against his, belly to back, feeling chilled despite the warmth of the night, and shrugged the covers up.

‘What happened?’ he asked softly.

‘I don’t know. I heard Willow crying and went to see what was wrong. She said …’

‘I heard. Goat?’

‘I think so. I think he got into her dreams somehow and gave her a nightmare.’

‘Or maybe she just had a nightmare about him.’

‘I hope so,’ Ki muttered against his neck. ‘But somehow I don’t think so.’

Morning came muted in grey. The bright blue skies that had shimmered over them for days were suddenly robed with clouds. The air was muggy, the team restless in the charged atmosphere. Rain, Ki thought to herself, and thunder. She breathed deeply of the heavy air but it didn’t satisfy her lungs. She rolled from the blankets and staggered upright.

Vandien sat cross-legged by a tiny fire, a mug of tea balanced on one knee. He raised his brows at her as she rubbed her face. ‘Why didn’t you wake me?’ she demanded.

‘I thought we could all use a little extra rest.’

She drew water from the cask on the wagon and sloshed it over her face. She ducked to peer under the wagon. ‘Where’s Willow?’ she asked, turning to accept a mug of tea from him.

‘Sleeping …’ His voice faded as he stooped to poke at her empty blankets. The eyes he raised to Ki were anxious. ‘She’s gone,’ he said needlessly.

‘How long?’ Ki wondered, ‘and where to?’

He shrugged. ‘I’ve been up about an hour. I thought she was still sleeping.’

‘Goat!’ They said the word simultaneously, but it was Ki who dragged the wagon door open. The boy was there, lying on his back with one arm flung out. A foolish smile was on his swollen face. As the light touched his eyes, they opened. He turned his head to squint at them. The smile faded.

‘Oh. Good morning.’ There was heavy sarcasm in his voice. Ki ignored it.

‘Do you know anything about Willow?’ she asked anxiously.

The fatuous smile returned. ‘Oh, yes,’ he replied leisurely. ‘I know lots about Willow. More than she knows herself,’ he added, a giggle in his voice.

‘Where’s she gone?’ Vandien demanded impatiently. ‘There’s bound to be patrols along this stretch of road, and if she’s spotted alone, with no papers …’

‘Gone?’ The word came out of Goat as if it were a rock he’d discovered in his mouth. ‘Willow’s gone?’

‘Yes,’ Ki told him angrily. ‘And if you know where, you’d better say now.’

‘She can’t be gone.’ Goat sat up, frowned, then winced and put his hand to his jaw. ‘My face hurts still, you pile of sheep dung,’ he told Vandien angrily. In the next breath he muttered, ‘She wouldn’t dare be gone. She can’t be gone.’ He glared at them as if he suspected a trick. ‘She’s probably off peeing in the bushes.’

‘Sure she is. Since dawn,’ Vandien agreed sarcastically. He turned to Ki. ‘Now what do we do?’

She shrugged. ‘We can wait for her to come back. But we aren’t sure that she’ll do that. Or we can look for her. Damn. I should have stayed with her last night, made her tell me what she was crying about.’

‘I should have tried to talk to her,’ Vandien added guiltily. ‘But I was just so tired.’

Ki shook her head. ‘None of this does us any good now. There’s no good in worrying about what we should have done. The question is, What do we do now?’ She turned aside from them, climbed up to the top of the wagon itself. ‘Willow!’ she called. But the heavy air of the gathering storm muffled her shout. Ki turned slowly, scanning the prairie in every direction. Its seeming flatness was a deception. The tall dry grass and low growing brush were moving in the winds of the rising storm like the waves stirred by a storm over water. Any of a hundred rises and dips could be hiding Willow, even if she were walking back toward them. And if she were deliberately hiding, lying flat in a swale of grass, they could look for days and never see her.

‘Where did she go, Goat?’ Vandien’s voice was flat. ‘And why did she go?’

‘How would I know?’ Goat demanded angrily. ‘I was sleeping in the wagon, stupid. It wasn’t my job to watch her.’

‘Goat.’ Ki cut into the argument. ‘Did you get into Willow’s dreams last night?’

He scrambled out of the wagon. He suddenly struck her as ridiculous, his clothes awry and his hair wild from sleep, his pale eyes huge in his swollen face. Her question hung in the air between them, and as she looked at his childish stance, his arms crossed stubbornly over his narrow chest, her own words seemed silly. This spoiled and pouting brat the nefarious dream-thief of the old legends?

‘That’s stupid,’ he echoed her thought. ‘Willow tells you a lot of gossip about me, and then, just because she runs away, you think it’s true. You’re stupid, both of you. Just as stupid as that dumb Willow.’

‘The girl in Algona,’ Vandien said, his voice soft and fanged. ‘Was she stupid, too? Or was she lying when she said she had dreamed about you?’

Goat looked flustered. ‘I don’t know!’ he sputtered. ‘Some stupid girl says something … who cares what the stupid little wench said … she just wanted to make an excuse, because she let me mate her. She wanted to make it my fault that she couldn’t keep her legs together.’

Vandien lifted his hand suddenly and Goat instantly shrank in on himself, throwing his arms up to cover his face.

‘Hitting him won’t get anything out of him,’ Ki observed pragmatically, but disgust was in her voice. ‘Leave him alone, Van.’ She climbed down from the wagon to stand in front of the boy. Vandien gave a huff of frustrated anger and turned away from them. Going to the fire, he began to kick dirt over it.

Goat peered out anxiously from the shelter of his arms. Seeing that Vandien was a safe distance away, he dropped his arms. ‘It wasn’t my fault,’ he told Ki earnestly. ‘None of it was my fault.’

‘Whatever.’ She dismissed the earlier quarrel. ‘What I need to ask is this. Where do you think Willow might be?’ As the boy opened his mouth to protest, she quickly filled in, ‘I know, you said you don’t know. I’m only asking you what you guess, where you suppose she would go if she felt very upset. You know her better than Vandien and I do; maybe you can guess what she might do.’

The calmness of Ki’s words reached the boy. He stood scuffing his foot in the dust. He finally looked up at Ki guilelessly. ‘She’d probably go on to Tekum. To her precious Kellich!’ There was a wealth of distaste in his words suddenly. ‘Yes,’ he added, staring off down the road. ‘She’d hurry ahead to Kellich, to try to explain.’

‘Explain what?’ Ki prodded gently. But Goat was wary again.

‘Whatever was troubling her,’ he said sweetly. ‘That would be just Willow’s way. Run ahead and tell all her troubles to big, brave Kellich. Big brave Kellich can make everything all better. Or so she thinks.’ The sneer in his voice was unmistakable now.

‘Vandien!’ Ki called, but he was already putting the big horses to harness.

When the rain broke it came down in sheets of grey water that shut down the world around them and set Goat scuttling inside the wagon. Lightning flashed in the distance, and cleared a space of silence in which Ki and Vandien listened to the creak and rumble of the wagon and the damp clopping of the horses’ hooves in the now wet road. He reached and put his hand on her leg as the thunder reached them, filling their ears with its threat. Ki took one wet hand from the reins and set it atop his.

‘You’re worried,’ he said, sliding closer to her.

She nodded into the rain, blinking against the heavy drops. ‘I feel responsible,’ she admitted.

‘Me, too.’ The rain was not cold, but it was constant, drenching them and running down their faces. It soaked Vandien’s hair to his skull, making his curls lie flat on his forehead and drip in his eyes. ‘I always wondered what it would be like to have children.’ He paused. ‘It’s a pain in the ass.’

‘When they’re your own, it’s even worse,’ Ki told him. ‘Except for the times when it’s wonderful.’ They rode a long ways in silence. The rain stained the grey backs of the horses to a deeper charcoal. The road became both sticky and slick. The horses began to steam. But despite Ki’s anxiety for Willow, the storm brought a strange peace with it. The drumming of the rain on the wagon became a noise so constant it was a different kind of silence. She and Vandien were alone on the box, rocking together to the sway of the wagon. The annoyance of the rain trickling down her collar and running a wet finger between her breasts seemed minor.

‘A few weeks ago, I’d have said this was miserable weather.’ Vandien echoed her thoughts. ‘Now it seems peaceful.’

She nodded into the rain, blinking away the blinding drops. ‘I’ve missed you,’ she said, and laughed aloud at how senseless her words seemed. But he understood. He lifted his hand from her leg and put his arm across her shoulders.

It was nearly noon before they came upon Willow. ‘She must have slipped away right after I talked to her, to get this far,’ Ki observed. Vandien nodded silently, and stared at the small figure plodding ahead of them. Her clothing was drenched, and her long skirt clung to her. Mud weighted the hem; her slippers were a ruin. Her hair was plastered down flat. But her spine was straight and she did not look back, even though she must have heard them coming. Ki glanced over at Vandien and slowed the big horses. Vandien stood, then agilely swung down from the moving wagon. His boots threw up clods of mud as he ran.

When he reached the girl he slowed to keep pace with her. Ki watched them walk together, the girl’s back straight and angry at first, and then starting to hunch in misery. Vandien, she knew, probably wasn’t saying a word. As a storyteller, he excelled, but his ability to listen, to nod and be understanding, had earned him more meals. She watched him listen, saw Willow wave her arms wildly and even caught the sound of her angry words as she ranted at Vandien. Then suddenly the girl turned and butted into him, burrowing her face into his shoulder and clinging to him as she stood crying in the rain.

Ki let the team come up on them and pulled them to a halt. She sat silent on the seat, feeling the wind of the storm buffet the side of the wagon as it drove the rain suddenly against it. Vandien was patting Willow’s back. He looked up at Ki, a resigned expression on his face. ‘Come on,’ he told the girl softly. ‘Let’s get up on the wagon. You’ll get there a lot sooner that way, you know.’

‘I guess.’ She lifted her face from Vandien’s shoulder, but did not look at him or Ki as she clambered up on the seat. She sat on the farthest edge of it, curled over her clenched fists and shivering. Vandien had to climb over her to regain his seat by Ki. As soon as he was settled, she started the team. They rode on, the silence as thick as the rain that pelted them.

‘Willow?’ Ki ventured finally.

Immediately the girl sat up. ‘I don’t want to talk about it!’ she flared. ‘I told you what he was, but no one believed me. No, everyone thought I was some stupid little twit, full of wild fancies. Well, now he has ruined me. And there’s nothing anyone can do. So I don’t want to listen to a lot of stupid apologies.’ Willow sniffed angrily.

Ki sighed, but said nothing. The pelting rain slowly changed to a pattering, and then ceased. As suddenly as it had begun the storm was gone, blowing off into the distance. Before them, the sky opened in a wide streak of blue, and light poured down like a gush of white wine, flooding the landscape before them. Ki pulled the team in for a moment to stare at it.

The land was obviously sloping away from them now. It was a very gradual slope, but in the far distance there was the silver glint of an immense river winding through the valley. There was an edging of dark green along it; trees, Ki decided. On the far side were the green and yellow shapes of tilled fields. The unnatural clarity of the light after the storm made it seem closer than it was. Rivercross would be on that water, she decided, and Villena not far beyond it. If only it were as close as it seemed, and both these annoying children delivered.

‘Tekum?’ Vandien asked, pointing, and she followed the direction of his finger. Yes, it was there, a pattern of fields and beyond them, enough buildings to make a respectable town. This, at least, was attainable.

‘We’ll be there sometime tomorrow,’ Ki estimated. It looked like a pretty, restful place. There were trees there, too, perhaps orchards on the outskirts of the town.

‘That low building at the beginning of the town. That’s the inn where Kellich said he’d meet me. Those orchards belong to his master. And the meadows beyond.’ There was childish pride in Willow’s voice as she spoke of her lover.

All were startled as the cuddy door slid open. Goat thrust his head out. ‘What are we stopping for … Oh!’ He stared at Willow and the atmosphere around the wagon was suddenly as charged as it had been before the storm. She stared at him, hatred shining in her eyes. Ki held herself ready for another tussle. But Willow turned her head away from Goat. Her lips were a hard line as she stared out over the wide river valley.

The wagon started with a lurch. Goat bumped his head on the side of the door. ‘Close the door, Goat,’ Vandien suggested. Goat looked from Willow’s stiff spine to Vandien’s cold eyes.

‘I didn’t do anything to her,’ Goat said suddenly. ‘But you’ll never believe that, will you? No matter what she says, you always believe her, and you always think I’m lying. I didn’t do a single thing to her …’

‘Did so!’ Willow hissed angrily. She whirled suddenly to confront him. ‘Lying won’t change it, Goat. I know what you are, they know what you are, everyone knows what you are! You think you can run away from it, but you can’t. When we get to Tekum, Kellich will know. Kellich and the whole inn! No matter where you go, people will find out …’

‘Oh?’ Goat’s voice was suddenly cold. ‘And you’re going to tell Kellich all about it, aren’t you, Willow? In every little detail? Well, then, let’s share what I know. Your pretty little Willow, Vandien, with the mismatched eyes? You think her so sweet and naive, running off to find her true love. I think you should know more about her. She isn’t what she appears, neither she nor Kellich. Willow is never what she pretends to be. I’m not the only one around here with mixed blood. Mine just shows. Did you know that when she was twelve or so, four of the old women in her village went to the Ducal adjutant there and swore she was a witch? Cost her papa a lot to get those charges dropped, it did. Of course, that was before he moved his two daughters to Keddi; Willow thought no one would ever know that about her. Didn’t you, Willow? Now it’s your turn. Go ahead, tell a secret you know.’

Willow had gone white except for two red spots on the points of her cheeks. She stared at Goat, and then swayed as if she would fall from the wagon. ‘Keshna!’ she invoked wildly. Vandien put out a hand to steady her, but as he touched her she stiffened. Drawing herself up straight, she took a deep breath. The wagon jolted on. Ki’s grim face stared out over the ears of her team. Goat sat quite still, smiling at Willow’s back. The sound of her ragged breathing was louder than the creak of the wagon. Twice she drew breath for speech, and Vandien kept his hand on her shoulder, braced for whatever she might say.

She took a sudden deep breath. She turned to him. Tears had tracked down her face and shone still in the brightness of the sun after the storm. But she no longer wept. Her eyes were open, but shallow; her soul was walled up behind them. He sensed that a decision had been made, and wondered what it was. But when she spoke, her calm words took him by surprise.

‘Won’t you tell us another story, Vandien, to pass the time?’