At Greenlanes

(An Epistle)

Do you remember, Margaret, how we came

Out on the heath our first evening

Together? How the pines rose like a name

Cried once by a dying man; and whirriting

Nearby the nightjar’s bell

Rang down reluctant curtain on the day?

Do you remember the brute smell

Of bracken that heaved at the darkness where we lay?

I could hear my heart like a lupin pod

Rattle its wizened dreams. (What now could rally

Hope grown dead pale feeding on its own blood?)

And then I heard your voice say ‘Tell me!’

It was the dew that falls on the castaway –

Honest and small as the dew but far more tender –

A sweetness drugging his dismay,

Though yet no rescuer sail flares up from under

The parched horizon.

So I was happier

Than I had been since loneliness began,

Secure with you, my wise and witty dear,

And Douglas the rabelaisian keen man.

Honeysuckle tuned our world

To roundelays that made the stiff sun nod;

All the summers of Arcady were revealed

In a blackbird’s period.

This hollow, where noon lay down to drowse and blink,

Every night became a bowl

Brimmed by the moon with nectar for me to drink

Rapt in the clear refectory of your soul.

I felt your thought reach out sure fingers

For mine, that had groped so long, so emptily,

Finding no flame but a touch turned it to cinders.

Your hands on mine, we worked the key

(How rustily it stammered!) of this dark mind,

This cupboard crammed with sour forgotten

Live skeletons yammering underground –

Fantastic fears in strait-jackets, all sodden

With solitude.

We turned the key. We let

The brave, bird-echoing sunlight in.

No monster showed: there was only Margaret,

And love, and a dead most laughable mannequin.