SATNAM TURNED DOWN their entreaties for dinner with the response that he had run into an old friend and the two of them had enjoyed some hearty snacks along with several cups of tea. He was completely stuffed and couldn’t eat another morsel, he pleaded.
Krishna expected that he would sit with her and brief her in detail about the council’s meeting. Instead, Satnam hurried up the steps to his room and bolted the door. She sat motionless for a while, staring vacantly at the stairs long after he had disappeared.
Satnam switched on the light in his room and lay down. He tried closing his eyes for a while.
The knots in the jute twine of his bed appeared to grow bigger as they pushed into his spine, causing him to toss and turn in discomfort. Why did his bed seem so uncomfortable tonight? He’d get up every few minutes, turn off the light for a while and then turn it on again. From pitch dark to bright light and then pitch dark again. The room swung randomly between the two extremes.
The hours ticked away. He felt like a bird whose wings have been clipped. The bird wants to fly, puts all its efforts into the endeavour, flaps its wings and rises briefly before plummeting back to the ground.
‘Ah, this is terrible. I can’t take it anymore,’ he mumbled to himself. He rose again and switched on the light. The room looked strangely bloated in the harsh light. His eyes went towards the wall clock and he exclaimed, ‘What? It’s a quarter past two already!’
He walked to the door and reached out to open the bolt but pulled his hand back as a voice within him cautioned, ‘Satnam! Where do you think you are going? It’s wrong to go to Krishna’s room at this time of the night. You will disturb her sleep.’ He took a step back. The hand he had extended towards the door changed direction and settled on the light switch. The room plunged back into darkness.
Several images flashed across his mind as soon as his back touched the bed. His mind had become a canvas for the ultimate artist, the one who could paint new pictures, erase them and create new ones as he willed.
The procession of paintings being made and erased went on for some time and his state of suspended animation was broken only when he heard a voice filter into the room through the window. There was a sweetness and melancholy in the voice that reached deep into his soul.
‘Who is singing out there?’ he wondered as he sat up in bed to listen more attentively. The voice was singing softly:
Other worlds do lie beyond these stars
Other ordeals still lie in love’s path
He felt that the song was bringing him a message straight from the heavens. Those two lines were like a beacon guiding him out of the labyrinth in which he had trapped himself. They had appeared like a life-giving shower on the arid landscape of his heart.
He got up from the bed and took a couple of long strides towards the door. He thought that he had become familiar with many of Krishna’s remarkable attributes. But the fact that she could also sing in such a melodious voice was something new.
He reached out to open the latch and once again withdrew his hand without touching the metal. It was raining and Krishna was probably getting drenched in the rain as she stood outside his door. And yet, he refrained from opening it. Maybe it was his greed, the desire to listen to the rest of the song without interruption that kept him frozen in place.
The mellow notes of the voice again echoed in every pore of his body:
No dearth is there of life in this world
Other caravans are there, in hundreds too
Don’t lose yourself in worldly colour and fragrance
Other gardens are there, and bird nests too
If you’ve lost one nest, why despair
Other places remain, to long for and lament
An eagle you are and fly you must
Other skies there are, spread out for you
Don’t get trapped in this day and night
Other times await you, and places too
Being lonesome in this party is a thing bygone
Other friends are there now, waiting for you.
Satnam felt the darkness within him being replaced by an incandescent brightness as he heard the ghazal. The paintings being created by the supreme artist on his mind were erased in a flash and their place was taken by a new picture being created by the lines of the ghazal. A steed appeared in the picture, flying through the clouds as it crossed over rivers and forests. It sped past the sun and the moon, left countless stars behind as it traversed the skies, staying on course as it headed towards its goal—a lofty peak that stood alone in the distance. The summit of idealism and high principles.
The ghazal had ended but its words were still echoing in Satnam’s ears, its rhythm resonating like the hooves of a steed galloping in the distance. He opened the door and stood aside without switching on the light.
A slender silhouette, more of a faint shadow than a person, stood shivering in the doorway.
Krishna entered the room, switched on the light and bolted the door from inside. Satnam was sitting on the bed as she approached him. His eyes had a blank look and his lips were whispering, ‘Farewell! Farewell!’
‘What did you say? Farewell?’ Krishna sat beside him and asked as a tremor went through her body.
‘You are omniscient, Krishna!’ Satnam murmured in response. ‘You’ve brought a divine message for me. I remember this poem of Iqbal very well. I think it was part of our syllabus at some point. But I was in such a delicate state today … your ghazal was like a message from God Himself. I was so upset, so agitated that I didn’t know if I would survive this night.’
‘But what on earth has got my brother so worried,’ she placed her hand on his shoulder and asked. ‘You were perfectly fine when you left home this afternoon. And what’s this business of “Farewell?” Why don’t you explain that first.’
‘By sheer coincidence, two separate incidents have taken place that have sent my brain into a spin. The first one was nothing extra-ordinary. Just that usual stuff about Sudarshan. He’s coming up with some vile new ways to discredit our efforts. But I do believe that he has made it impossible for the two of us to live in the same house. I’ll have to find a new lodging for you somewhere. The place on Queens Road where we have our office is quite spacious. If you agree, I’ll make arrangements for you and Bapu ji to move in there. You’ll be able to directly supervise the work of the Unity Council, too, so there’s that advantage.’
‘You shouldn’t allow these things to bother you so much, Bhaji,’ Krishna replied with a worried look on her face. ‘We can’t be driven by our emotions alone. There is a huge task ahead of us. And as for Sudarshan and his canards, let him do what he likes. We have truth on our side and there is no reason to be fearful. As for the matter of lodgings, I am happy to stay wherever you think is most convenient. It doesn’t make that much of a difference. But now, let’s come to the second incident.’
‘The second one,’ Satnam started with some hesitation. ‘The other incident is one that will snatch you away from me forever. I know that it will take a long time for my heart to recover from this blow. But you should be happy because I’ve found something today that is very precious for you.’
‘Why are you getting into these riddles?’ Krishna frowned with irritation. ‘What is this precious thing that you have found, and who in this world has the power to snatch me away from you?’
‘You might have forgotten him, but he certainly hasn’t forgotten you.’
‘Who?’
‘The one you have loved, but also hated from time to time.’
‘Why can’t you say clearly whatever you have in mind, Bhaji? I can’t figure out these riddles of yours.’
‘Krishna! Haven’t you loved a fellow called Yusuf?’
‘What?’ A muffled cry escaped her lips.
She lifted her eyes to glare at Satnam, then quickly lowered her gaze. She wanted to say something but there was an invisible force dragging the words back before they could reach her lips.
A minute passed. Then another. In silence.
Krishna sighed deeply before lifting her head. She lifted her gaze from the floor and fixed it on Satnam’s face. He looked carefully at her, unable to discern the expression that had now descended into her eyes, a strange mix of compassion and despair. He had never seen her in such a miserable state since that first encounter in the serai.
‘Krishna!’ he patted her back as he spoke. ‘Have I hurt you?’
‘No,’ came the monosyllabic response.
‘I promise you I won’t speak another word on this subject. Please forgive me, Krishna.’
‘No, no! Please go ahead. I’ll listen carefully.’
‘Krishna! I met a person today who told me all about Yusuf.’
‘What did you say? Someone told you about Yusuf?’
‘That’s right.’
‘What did he say?’
‘He said that Yusuf hasn’t died. He is very much alive.’
‘Alive? He is alive? But … but…’ she mumbled, unsure of her next question.
‘I learned from that man that Yusuf isn’t just alive. He lives by the memories of Naseem.’
News about Yusuf being alive was like a shower of rose petals on Krishna’s heart but the reference that ‘he lives by the memories of Naseem’ instantly buried the rose petals under a heap of embers.
Krishna had never managed to push aside her feelings for her childhood love. But if there was one thing that always triggered pangs of despair, it was the thought that Yusuf had probably died because of her, that he would lay the responsibility for his death at her doorstep. Hearing that Yusuf was still alive lifted a heavy burden from her soul, but learning that he was going around claiming that he lived by her memories sent a wave of anger through her body.
‘Enough, Bhaji!’ she frowned in irritation as she thought of Yusuf. ‘Knowing that he’s still alive is good enough for me. That’s all I wanted to hear. I don’t need to know anything more about him.’
‘I really don’t want to say anything more about him, Krishna. The rest of the stuff is something that he wants to tell you himself. But let me just say one thing: trust me, this Yusuf is a completely transformed person. His friend told me all about Yusuf’s failings and the way he had misbehaved with you. And he told me plenty of other things that led me to believe that today’s Yusuf is pure 24-karat gold. I wouldn’t be exaggerating if I said that he is now truly worthy of being your partner.’
‘No, Bhaji,’ she protested. ‘There is absolutely no way that I’ll see that fellow again. It doesn’t matter if he is pure gold or a diamond-encrusted crown. Please don’t bring up his name with me ever again.’
‘I won’t speak about him. But on one condition. You must meet him just once and hear him out.’
‘Sorry, Bhaji. I can’t do that.’
‘You certainly can if you wish to.’
‘I absolutely don’t wish to.’
‘Won’t you do it for my sake? I know that you won’t turn down a request from your brother.’
‘God forbid that I turn down a request from you. But let this be the one thing on which I won’t agree as long as I live. Of course, you can kill me right now and carry my corpse across to meet him.’
‘No, Krishna! Please don’t humiliate me, my dear sister. I’ve given my word to my friend.’
‘Fine!’ she spoke with bitterness. ‘I am ready to be insulted so that you don’t get humiliated.’
‘You insulted? I don’t understand.’
‘Yes, I’ll be insulted. By a man from whom it would be foolish to expect anything else. Since your friend has shared so much with you, he must also have told you about the number of times I was spurned, the number of times I was humiliated.’
‘I really don’t want to prolong this argument,’ Satnam huffed. ‘My only request was that you meet him just once.’
‘And I’ve already given my response.’
‘What?’
‘That you can take my dead body to see him.’
‘Krishna! You’re making a big mistake.’
‘You can see it any way you like.’
‘Okay, let me make another suggestion.’
‘What?’
‘If you don’t want to meet Yusuf, so be it. But at least you can meet his friend, Mr Shafi? I hope you won’t have reservations about that.’
‘Shafi? The one you said has recently become a member of our council?’
‘Yes.’
‘I’m happy to meet him. In fact, I’d already said that I’d like to see him.’
‘Good! That might solve the problem.’
Having arrived at an agreement, the two sat for a little while to discuss other matters before Krishna got up from the bed and headed towards the door. ‘Wait!’ Satnam called. ‘There’s something else that I wanted to discuss it with you. You know that Bapu ji has spoken about going in for an eye operation. As luck would have it, I ran into Dr Sohan Singh this afternoon and took up the subject with him. He’s been a very close friend of my father’s. He said that this is not the best season for eye operations, but he agreed to see Bapu ji tomorrow morning at the hospital. If the problem isn’t too serious, he might operate on Bapu ji tomorrow itself. I suggest that we take Bapu ji to the hospital in the morning.’
‘That’s wonderful,’ Krishna beamed. ‘To be honest, it’s only his will power that enables him to carry on. The fact is that his eyesight has gone from bad to worse.’
‘It also serves another purpose.’
‘And what’s that?’
‘It automatically removes you from this house for a few days. You’ll have to be with Bapu ji in the hospital until he recovers.’
Krishna knew that Satnam had come up with the suggestion so that he could also counter Sudarshan’s innuendo. She was happy that this would allow him to kill two birds with one stone.